Dressing "sexy" versus dressing "normal"

[Allison Chaynes]

Forgive me if my choice of words does not convey what I'm asking as intended.

How many of you dress to look sexually appealing? I mean, like tight party dresses, stilettos, etc as your primary interest in CDing, versus how many of you primarily dress to appear like a "normal" woman, just another face in the crowd?

Just curious...

[Danitgirl1]

I dress the way I want to dress.
I dress for the occasion.
Sometimes that means jeans, cowboy boots and a casual top
Sometimes that means a LBD and stilettos
I try to look my best whatever I am wearing

[Becky Blue]

Allison, I understand what you mean. For me it is really horses for courses. For example if I am dressing to go out in the daytime shopping I want to blend so dressing normal is the way to go. If I were going dancing with a bunch of other girls to a TG friendly venue then perhaps the look is a bit more sexy, maybe a slightly shorter skirt or higher heels.

I have found that its not always so easy fitting a mans body into clothes designed for woman, often means we have to trade expediency for a sexy look. For example perhaps a sexy lacy bra may feel or look amazing but it may not offer enough support for insert etc.

[pinklilly211]

I get what you mean also. I usually dress "normal" at home doing every day things. But when I get together with other gurls it"s all out sexy!! Just spent last weekend at a Friends place and it was a FULL ON DRESS TO IMPRESS time. What a blast!! Lilly

[Ashley090]

It depends. At home my clothing shoes and makeup can be quite ordinary like plain shirt and leggings (umdergarments ofc) but also can ends up in sexy overbust corset with decent clevage, miniskirt and pantyhose and wearing 6in heels.
In terms of going out, I aim for "ordinary girl" look to draw least attention as possible. That means no short skirs, big necklines tops or stiletto heels even if I still could (teen girl at hearth :D )
But Becky got point, not all sexy clothes will look sexy on us sadly. Not much of us can take sexy pics posing in lace bra and panties. Envy those who can!!

[Majella St Gerard]

Everything I wear is sexy.

[Tracii G]

That depends on where I am going.
Shopping just a normal everyday look, out to a club I may do a plunging neckline and show cleavage.
Maybe even a dress or skirt out clubbing.
I never consider myself to be sexy in any way shape or form to be honest. I have had guys seem to think I had some sexy attraction.
The one article of clothing that gets me the most comments from guys is tight jeans.

[Teresa]

Allison,
As I mainly go out socially to meetings I dress depending on what is planned for the evening, the dress in my avatar was for the Xmas party . I don't intentionally dress sexily what others see in that is up to them, I always wear dresses or skirts with heels , I can get away with it with my legs , I do admit my legs are my my favourite part when wearing stockings and heels . I have worn a couple of bodycon dresses and next time out I will be wearing a leather skirt . Most of the time I wear what I feel comfortable in I do try and choose items that suit my figure it's the putting it all together that's fun.
If I went out in the daytime to shop dressed I would probably have to tone it down , I would possibly attract attention for being overdressed but possibly not because I look sexy .

[Rachelakld]

In the early mornings, when I'm feeling most naughty, I like to dress ****ty although rearly get outside (maybe 3 times a year) in that mode, but once the sun is up I like to dress normal.
Maybe one day i might start enjoying the night life and be more "sexy" but doubt it somehow.

[CateNatalia]

I dress what I consider to be definitely sexy, but (hopefully) vintage elegant. Glamor is where it's at for me. So that means fully-fashioned stockings, high heels, long satin gowns, pearls and full makeup. I love the art that's involved in choosing an outfit, the makeup and so on. That's what makes me feel like a woman, but of course I realise it's different for everyone. I can completely understand those who are approaching it very differently.

I don't venture outside when dressed; if I did, maybe it would be a little different.

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o Allison,
I'd have to say that in the past it was all about dressing "sexy".
But back then I was hiding in my closet, and my SO didn't have a clue.

Since then things have changed....

First of all, and most importantly, my SO discovered my CDing.
I had no choice but to show her everything.

From there she had a few remarks about my outfits.
(I'm sure she held ALOT back)
But over time I've been learning that if I want to go out
in public...I'll stand out a little less if I dress appropriately.

So how do I dress now?

Well...I'm going for age appropriate sexy! (In HEELS of course!)

Much Love,
Kristyn

[sometimes_miss]

I think we mostly dress to reflect how we'd like to be. If that's sexy, we dress sexy. If it's to feel like we're in a particular role, we dress like that (like how I feel good in my cheerleader uniforms, or my non-sexy school uniforms).

[Georgina]

I only wear clothes that I like, always dresses or skirts, but more on the mature side.

[Mollyanne]

I dress not overly sexy but will wear a skirt and heels

Mollyanne

[Lily Catherine]

Mostly normal. Not too sure how well I can pull "sexy" off, or if I should at all.. I know I've tried, on and off, for some of my photos. I might well have come across as "skanky" even, although I hope to avert that in my daily dress. Sexiness is probably also dependent on the person: one can probably still be sexy even if one is wearing a sack.

I think revealing a lot of skin (a common measure of sexiness) above my hips will be fairly difficult, however. Even if I wear forms I'd like a good part of them concealed - ditto for hip shapers.

[kimdl93]

Everyday, normal, presentable and nice...maybe a bit more stylish for evenings out

[Tracii G]

I dress what I consider to be definitely sexy, but (hopefully) vintage elegant. Glamor is where it's at for me. So that means fully-fashioned stockings, high heels, long satin gowns, pearls and full makeup. I love the art that's involved in choosing an outfit, the makeup and so on. That's what makes me feel like a woman, but of course I realise it's different for everyone. I can completely understand those who are approaching it very differently.

I don't venture outside when dressed; if I did, maybe it would be a little different.

Thats the key thing you don't go out in public.

[CarlaWestin]

Everything I wear is sexy.

I'm guilty with this one. I even have a gray wig from when I was experimenting with age appropriate appearances.
Yawn fest.

[Alice_2014_B]

Like others, I have a certain "foundation" style.

I always dress up with the following requirements:
Heels no lower than 4.5 inches, collar/choker, and a dress or skirt no lower than the knees (no pants/trousers on this girl).

In general, I believe, my style stands out; however, I never do cleavage.
That being said, I've been told I have a sexy look by some, but I see my look as somewhat normal.
But my aforementioned requirements can most certainly make any woman stand out.

We all like what we like.

:)

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Allison :hugs:, With my large collection of clothes and shoes I can cover the whole spectrum
from a blending in soccer mom all the way to dressed to the nines very sexy style
Variety is the spice of life when it comes to dressing pretty ...:daydreaming:...

[XemmaX]

i try to dress relatively stylish rather than sexy. i don't think i could pull 'sexy' off...

[Pat]

When I used to dress occasionally I tried for stylish/sexy/special occasion. And it kind of makes sense because each time was a special occasion. Now I'm full time I dress "normal" because I'm going about my normal day and interacting with normal people. I still like to dress up for occasions but my criteria is probably a lot more like a typical female -- what's practical for the occasion and looks good on me? I will say that I almost never dress as I used to do when I was pretending to be cisgender male -- then I'd just throw on clothes because they fit and not really care about them.

[NicoleScott]

Everything over-the-top glamour, which to me is sexy.

[DIANEF]

The majority of my clothes are of the 'blending' type, but I do have some that could be considered glamorous, or even sexy. Unfortunately I get little opportunity to wear them.

[Jean 103]

I get it. Blending is overrated. I wear what I think I look good in. I'm thin and wear tight fitting clothes, short dresses, high heels. I find it's more fun to stand out and be the unicorn in the room than part of the wall paper.

[Devi SM]

Not been reading all the answers to your post mine is like in a guide to trasgenders book says, we want to express our feminity dressing and at the beginning, as many of us did, we go to extreme, fishnets, miniskirts, corsets, garter, high heels, etc everything that highlight our femine desire to be a woman, in that path usually the lipstick goes strong red, the make up is overdone that we look more like sex workers or hookers tham normal women, but then when some of us can go out of the closet and dress more often, move into a more centered way to dress.
If you see my posts here, I've been trying to show my femine shapes, bust, butt, hip pads, etc. but now when buying wife is orienting to a more normal woman dress, especially for my age.
Now, if I go to a club like hamburgers Mary where tons of crossdresser, transsexuals, etc gather, my dressing is more sexual, like any woman that go to a club wears, tight miniskirts, high heels, like when you go to Vegas, at night, that is a kind obligated attire.

[Jenny22]

At my age, sexy isn't an option, but color is! The brighter the better (hot pinks) for at home, stylish for a dinner out, and normal for other outs.

[Brandybea]

My response is likely colored by the fact that I am still closeted and still in somewhat decent shape for someone 50+ yrs old. So my preference is a sexier tighter fitting clothes that show off my figure. For my own benefit (since I am closeted) I love looking in the mirror or at pics of myself and seeing a feminine shape and sexy woman looking back. However, if I was going out in public I bet I would be more conservative in an effort to not attract too much attention to my nervous self.

[docrobbysherry]

I think women with shapely figures r sexy if whatever they r wearing shows it.:daydreaming:

So, I try to do the same with Sherry's looks. Both at home, where overtly sexy is normal.:D

And, out in public. Where if the outfit doesn't show off my figure, I won't wear it!:thumbsdn:

[Lana Mae]

Lana Mae is too old and does not have the shape to be sexy, but she does have some sexy underwear! LOL Hugs Lana Mae

[LaSirenaBella]

I'm often in jeans and either a t-shirt or nice top. Jeans do show off curves quite well, at least for me. And I want to feel comfortable. I've sometimes called it "Cape Cod Lesbian Casual."

[BillieAnneJean]

I always dress appropriately for my projected age and for the occasion. What this usually means is I present in a classy manner.

I go OUT enfemme every time I am dressed. Almost entirely in the general population frequented venues, shopping, restaurants. My goal is to blend in. The GPs don't know what I am exactly if they look closely, but one thing is certain. I am an ambasatrix for the trans and the whole LGBTQ population. I know this because nearly every time I am OUT someone stops me and asks probing but polite questions about myself and their cousin, neighbor, co-worker, uncle, son, friend. I end up helping people I may never know.

Dressing to blend in is also a safety item. Looking like what I am trying to get them to believe means that if they figure it out, if it takes just 8 seconds, they will miss thir phone or lose interest. If they don't know for sure that I am a CDer, if there is any chance that I might be a woman, they will be cautious about confronting or upsetting me. It is still culturally unacceptable to upset a woman. If they do say something I react in exactly the manner a woman I am projecting would react.

If they have to think about it to decide, I have already won.

Besides our Group, The Grand Illusions has an IN meeting when we can dress any way we want as long as it is in good taste. We have an OUTing for those able and willing to blend in.

FUN!

[Periwinkle]

I definitely don't dress sexy. But I wouldn't really call it normal either. Where I live, it's pretty uncommon to see women (or men for that matter) put effort into their appearance. Everybody looks about the same. I can't remember the last time I saw someone other than me wear a skirt to a place other than church. My style, whether I'm crossdressing or not, is something I put a lot of effort into. I know I don't blend in. I get comments on my appearance all the time, and not all of then are positive. But putting effort into my appearance every day makes me feel happy and confident, so I'd much rather continue to do so and stand out than to stop and look just as bland as everyone else in town.

[Eva Bella]

I don't have a "daytime" look.. I'm wearing fitted bodycon or flared dresses even in the daytime. Usually pretty strong eyeliner and shadow. I have about 30 pairs of heels, one pair of flat sandals, and one pair of sneakers.

I tried to tone it down a bit in my earlier days, but I found that I felt more uncomfortable. After I embraced "being me" rather than trying to "be a girl," everything came into place.

Although I do live in Los Angeles, and it's not uncommon to go to a boring shopping mall at noon and see a GG completely turning it out in a cocktail dress and awesome makeup. My day looks really don't stand out that much here.

[rachaelsloane]

Allison,
I've been going out in SF all around for almost 5 years now and find myself dressing down from when I first went out. I wore a lot of dresses and skirts and the occasional pair of jeans, but now it's been more jeans and legging outfits. The most sexiest outfit is the one I wore (Avatar pic) last year to a formal event, otherwise I dress to be comfortable. I'm usually complemented on what I wearing so I must be doing something right.
Rachael

[NancySue]

In our area, you rarely see combed hair, makeup...basically plain/sloppy. So, I'm forced to dress to blend in. I do "push the envelop" occasionally with a little more eye makeup and lipstick. After dark, I wear hose and yes, they draw attention...especially from guys. I wear low heels. Women rarely smile or make eye contact. I'd like to think they feel bad for looking so bad. I find this frustrating, but it is what it is. My wife agrees.

[JeanTG]

Normal for me. Dresses, skirts, pantyhose, leggings, skinny jeans, blouses, tops.

[Fiona123]

I have a very small fem wardrobe. I prefer dresses/skirts. It's about being (& feeling) feminine not necessarily sexy for me.

[suzanne]

Where I live, it's seems like the women never wear a dress, and a skirt only occasionally. The only time you'll see a woman in a dress is at a formal event or an upscale restaurant. In this environment, anyone in a skirt gets noticed, especially a man my size. So when I want to be out dressed up, I do, but I generally do it in a low key way. Typically, I'm in a dark, knee length skirt, top and black cardigan and my favorite mini wedges. So, for mall shopping, I'm already out of the ordinary, but not in any extreme way.

[Allison Chaynes]

Thanks for the responses so far. As for me, I'm not really into much other than being comfortable. For me, that's tennis shoes/flats, jeans/skirts, t-shirts. Then again, I don't leave the house in full Allison mode. For me, about the only time I'm in heels and a sexy outfit, is when the wife is feeling frisky.

I really need to learn make up skills, as I intend to do Diva Las Vegas someday!

[Diane Taylor]

When I first started dressing back in the early 90's I started with the "streetwalker" look but quickly realized that wasn't the image I wanted to project. I threw that stuff out and bought clothing that could be worn in public, nothing frumpy looking but rather stylish and attractive.

[njcddresser]

I guess my answer is similar to most of the others in that it depends on the occasion. However, my favorite is to dress sl*tty. I love short skirts, low cut tight tops, sheer stockings and high heels. If this is sl*tty then sign me up!!

[NicoleScott]

I tried to tone it down a bit in my earlier days, but I found that I felt more uncomfortable.



I have posted that idea several times over the years, using very close to your very words. I make up and dress very much over-the-top, and that's my style. Given the choice of toning it down to go out and blend or dressing home alone OTT, I stay home and dress my way. I have taken a third choice several times - going to a tg-friendly club where my look was ignored or even appreciated. I'm very happy to dress up alone without expectation to conform to anyone's fashion rules but mine. It's about me, my girly stuff, and my mirror.

[CateNatalia]

I'm very happy to dress up alone without expectation to conform to anyone's fashion rules but mine. It's about me, my girly stuff, and my mirror.

Words to live by. Couldn't have put it any more succinctly than that.

[Karmen]

I dress sexy at home. When I go out, I dress normal, so I don't stand out too much. But I still wear 3 or 4 inch heels.

[Emma1]

I generally dress attractively, but not provocatively. I usually wear skirts and dresses, but I generally avoid low necklines or dresses that are more than an inch or two above the knees.

[missNikki]

When I started wearing and buying womens clothes, I always bought sexy, because thats how I wanted to look. Now I'm buying more regular clothes to try to blend in as Im trying to get out of the house

[Jeri Ann]

Hey Allison,

Sexy women exude sensuousness no matter what they wear. Certainly an occasion can be enhanced by dressing more provocatively which might be normal for that situation and a lot of fun. :lovestruck: Personally I always dress appropriately for the occasion, no matter what.

Jeri

[curvious]

I recently went to a CD TG group meeting and I was dressed in a tight skirt, black hose, 4" pumps, and a sheer black top. Lipstick , Eye shadow, makeup and big hair with lots of jewelry. What a shocker. the gurls there were dressed normal. blouses pants, jeans, sandals, boots, etc.... I stood out like sore thumb and everyone stopped talking when I walked in and just looked at me. IT was pretty crazy, but exhiliarating. They were all very supportive.... My biggest fear was being pulled over during the 20 minute ride to my hotel.....

[Secret Sis]

Definitely more on the sexy side for me.. All I own is sexy lingerie (2 drawers full of it), a half closet of miniskirts, very short dresses and sexy tops and another drawer full of sexy costumes- ballet tutus, a French Maid outfit, etc. Everything I have is probably completely inappropriate for someone of my age and weight, but I never leave the house while dressed and my wife is fine with it.

[Gabriella111]

My bf is neither or those. He dresses in what he finds comfortable and flattering, but always very casual. So it's neither what you defined as sexually appealing or an attempt to look like a normal woman. He doesn't have a face that will pass, so I don't know that he would try to pull off a cocktail dress and heels. He certainly has the legs for it, and even the cleavage, depending on dress (he has nice pecs, so from the right angle...), but I don't get the impression it's on his bucket list. And dressing is just who he is. It's not about trying to be or look like a woman. It's what he's drawn to and what makes him happy. If there's a need for us to get dressed up and sexy, he wears a tailored suit.

[Sandin Meknickers]

Depends what you call sexy. The subtlest aspect can spark inspiration.