Money and dressing

[SometimesKairi]

This could well be just confirmation bias but from the people I have spoken to here who dress, all have very good job/retired with cash.

I am wondering if there's a corrolation between having the money and dressing.

Just a curious thing to talk about maybe

[Alice Torn]

I have been low income all my life. I have also noticed that most on here have had pretty good careers, or are retired. I did hard labor all my life, except for security guard work later in life. Was a gravedigger, paint factory worker, baled hay for farmers, laborer, new construction window washer, landscaper, cared for a quadriplegic man, security, Air Force. Helped my elderly father the past six years. No SO, or wife, or supportive family. Very few friends. Lots of acquaintences. Strted full dressing at age 51, but did minor dressing at age 13, off and on. Every time i start to save a bit of money, another big car repair, or dental work, or something else blows it away. A proverb says money sprouts wings, ans flies away!

[Bobbi46]

For me no the correlation does not apply. Dressing is deep within me, is part of my psyche. Sure I have a good pension but that still does not give me the ability to just go out and buy whatever I fancy, round the next corner there is always going to be something to trip up the status quo.
Also available money does not drive the need the want to dress. Dressing is something deep within all of us, and as such especially for me money does not drive me to dress. I dress because I want to, to feel feminine and to encompass a way of life deeply embedded within me. A meaningful way of life which I feel would not be if it was just driven by money plus the fact that such a life would be like a light switch on and off depending on needs whereas dressing from a deeply embedded need is quite a separate to dressing because there is money to do it.

[Alice Torn]

I agree with Bobbi. Money really has nothing to do with the desire to dress.

[Tama]

Alas, rich girl, po' girl.. I have been both...Spent far more time in the poor category but, I'd definitely say that cash-flow has little bearing on our pastime. I've acquired whatever I wanted/needed regardless of the shallow nature of my pockets. but then, when things get good, it's off to the designer stores (Hermes being my favorite!), and have fun! even if it's once in 10 years, no matter, it's fun anyway...

[TrishaLake]

I think I see your point. I know for me I always wanted to dress and had pieces but to achieve my full move to go out, yes I agree money was beneficial. I was able to experiment and try without worrying about cash. That helped, I can see doing ti with less especially today with the internet and more freedom, but for me money was very helpful.

[Micki_Finn]

It could just be that it seems that way because only the people with good money talk about how much money they have. Could have nothing at all to do with dressing.

[AlissaMurray]

I have unfortunately lived paycheck to paycheck for most of my life. I'm not proud, it just is what it is. It may be easier for some one who is retired with a few bucks to dress but that is about it. I don't think money has anything to do with it in any shape or form. Maybe just in the sense that some of us shop at Walmart, Target, and Thrift shops while others can afford to shop at more high end stores. That's about it.

[DIANEF]

I don't have tons of money but am far from destitute. As has been said, this has no bearing on my dressing, and as I have pretty much everything I need already I only have to buy sundries like make up and tights. I do buy things every now and then, but have to keep it under control as my wife would love to know where the money is going!

[reb.femme]

Having money is certainly the gateway to having lots of possessions, clothes and accessories, but I can't see that it makes us what we are.
I've worked all my life, minimal time unemployed, but certainly not well off. Living in south-east London, it's not the most expensive place in the world, but it doesn't help either.

They say that being a multi-millionaire won't make you happy. OK, so when is it my turn to put the theory to the test?

Becky

[gina shiney]

Dressing doesn't require loads of cash. For those who are on a low income it's more the justification of where the money is spent. More available cash makes it easier to purchase nicer clothing (more) & to have accessories such as natural hair wigs,jewelry, fashionable shoes etc. With more disposable income one can experiment on one's own style, afford makeovers, pedicures, manicures and stylists. Those that are fortunate to have available spare cash can also travel for social gatherings away from their location thus allowing them to maintain a separation of their other lives. (If they require it)
For anyone we must have clothing,it just depends on are we out or not. Jocks & socks or panties & hose can be worn out under pants/jeans without anyone being aware. Yes for us who live this life with limited funds it can be more difficult to dress to our own perceived image, but look in the real world and women dress to all different standards in all kinds of clothing.
Btw gina shiney lives the limited income life.

[JenniferMBlack]

I can see where it would appear to be the case. If you have money you can buy the things you need and have money to get out and do things. Then you come online and post your fun times. If your low in disposable income you can't afford to get out as much.

[Sandin Meknickers]

Nah, I don't think so. My Mum used to collect from food banks. Our meat used to come in tins with a VAT 69 style font and have E.E.C. typed on them. I've done OK for myself in adult life and had the same core identity throughout. if it was a little corrupted at times.

I will say money does make things a lot more accessible but it's on the individual to access the right things.

[Diane Taylor]

Money has nothing to do with the DESIRE to dress but certainly can affect the amount and type of clothing one can buy.

[Meghan4now]

If you have the time and resources to be on this forum, even if you're dirt poor, you are probably doing better than 50% of the world's population. Add to that fact, that you must speak English with at least some fluency, and you are narrowing it down. Quite frankly, if you are spending a huge amount of time here, then you have a luxury. Otherwise, you might consider spending your time at gainful employment!

And remember participating on this board has no correlation to the amount of time, money spent or even how "complete" anyone ACTUALLY dresses! It's just a forum!

[Amelie]

Ha ha ha. I been poor all my life and I now live in a trailer, but I'm kinda happy. I started out trans when young and was forced to leave school cause I would have been killed. So I have no education, but I do have skills but no matter how nicely I dress, they still won't hire me, a tans girl. I even had to do nasty stuff when young to survive, today some would call it escort service, but I wasn't all that classy to be called an escort, just a teen with no where to go. So I relied on men to support me in some way or another. Now I am free of all that but still poor, lol.


PS-I don't have a computer, I have to go down away a bit and use someone else's.

[Paula2]

I do like your new picture better! I don't believe money really matters in our community..I am just a factory worker..I am still new here but I hope it is about learning new things

[Tracii G]

Not sure that "having money" makes any difference.
If the will to dress is there one will find a way to dress. Goodwill Salvation Army etc are get ways to build an inexpensive wardrobe.
If you notice some here post pics with the brand name/designer and cost of the item.
I suppose they do it to brag or to make others think they have lots of money.
Generally people with lots of money never brag like that so you know that person that does brag has just spent their rent money on $400 designer shoes.

[Stacy Darling]

Correlation and Dependence?
There is no definitive answer, it is all relative to the individual, their current circumstance and their state of mind.

I'll openly say that I spend money on myself because I love myself! But if I break down the amount of money I spend on manicures it will equate to about AU$3. per week. All of my clothes are second hand ( except underwear and swimwear of course ) and I have never spent over $12. on a dress from the OP shop/ salvation army store.

Now I will say that I know where Dior in Sydney is and just like Tama I also am partial to Hermes.

Now that I have confused myself and don't know if I'm rich or poor, the one thing I do know is that no matter what happens in my financial world, I will always be Stacy, and love her for richer or for poorer.

That was confusing!

Stacy!

[Ressie]

Most CDs I know are quite intelligent or talented. And sometimes that intelligence has helped some in landing a good paying job or career. Since I've been a musician my entire life, there have been ups and downs. I've never been wealthy. Looking back, I mostly blame myself for the periods when I was poor. I could have made better decisions when I was younger but also I lacked information. Ignorance is not bliss.

Some don't have the drive to become wealthy or financially comfortable. Being born into poverty is obviously a disadvantage, yet it gives some people a reason to work hard to build up a bank account. Sometimes I feel sorry for those that never experienced poverty.

I closing, it has nothing to do with the desire to cross dress - Just the ability to shop!

[LizL]

It is a very expensive hobby, no question about that.

This forum does seem to skew a bit older.

With age, you hopefully have moved further along in your career and have more disposable income.

And also as you age, you start to care less and less about what other people think, and thus you become a little more bold with things like cross dressing. My feelings anyway.

[Tracii G]

Ressie the last line in your post is dead on the money!!!
For a musician to get a decent bank account going you need to gig every night of the week and not keep a running bar tab.
People think musicians make lots of money but no thats not how it works these days.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Having money does not affect the desire to dress. Those who are most visible in the trans community tend to be better off, though.

[IleneD]

I think the RETIRED aspect provides more time and leisure to engage in crossdressing. I don't think its a $$$ thing at all except that a person should be financially secure before they retire and leave a needed career.
When some men - our forum members - had active careers, crossdressing meant more risk, greater exposure, limited resources, etc. Now with time, there's no rush. More time to think about "it".

[Rachelakld]

I've $20 to last me from Friday to next pay (Thursday), luckily I already have a full wardrobe so today (Sunday) I still managed to get out pretty and have a $4 coffee, read the shops newspaper and just people watched for a bit.
I probably could have gone to the museum or art gallery (both free), gone to the beach, walk the dog etc.

I do actually have more money but trying to reduce bills (vets bill & daughters Uni fees), so living as cheap as possible.

[susan54]

I agree that the urge to dress is not income-related but how you dress is. Maybe the impression gained on this forum is not so much income related as age related. Older people will be more likely to be at the top of their salary grade or have paid off the mortgage. I have been poor and still wanted to buy nice clothes but couldn't so now that I am a bitter better off I enjoy my spending ability. In love high quality clothes and accessories but I have a knack of finding incredible bargains. I am currently wearing a scuba dress by Coast retailing at £109. I paid £39 for it in Debenhams yesterday, and that is far from my best bargain. If you are limited in funds and care about looking good invest - that is the right word - in a style consultation. They will advise you on exactly what suits you and when you do buy you won't make mistakes. If in the UK use House of Colour - way outclasses the alternatives. It actually saves money in the long term.

[Vikky]

The desire to dress is more pressing than the money to buy clothes. Having said that I do have a reasonable income in retirement but still buy most of my wardrobe via charity chops, Ebay, Amazon and where they come from the usual retailers they tend to be at the lower end of the price range.
Vikky

[donnalee]

As a lifelong musician, I must agree with Traci and Ressie that it is and always was a tough way to make a living. Living poor has it's advantages though as it teaches you to plan ahead and to spend what money you have carefully. You have to think about how useful something may be and whether it will do for your uses even though it may not be your first choice, where to locate what you need and how to acquire it at the lowest cost. Since I am retired on a small pension now, I am pretty comfortable as long as I am careful where and how I spend what money I do have, but it would not be possible if I hadn't learned how to deal with it early on.

[reinasblack]

With decent size 13 women high heels costing $150.00 + s&h a pair and with having a size 32 waist measurement meaning your a XL in female dresses and pants it all comes at a premium cost when I first started dressing. Wanting to dress and spending $600+ for one night out when I was college bound was not gonna happen often if at all.plus being new and shy about it cause I am in the closet with crossdresing for most of my aquantences

Stuff is cheaper now but not back then

[abby054]

I doubt money has anything to do with the desire to crossdress, but it definitely affects the performance. It is no disgrace to be poor, but it can be inconvenient.

[Lana Mae]

Regardless of the money a way will be found to express the feminine side! I am semiretired, because social security is not enough and life circumstances ate my retirement funds. So, I have to work and right now can only make so much or I lose the social security! (not 66 yet!) I have to save money to do almost anything! Now that Uncle Sam took a sizable slice for taxes(first time ever owed !) The car fiasco and still in limbo with old car and new car payments are $100 more! It is going to have to chill for a while but I am not stopping! This is me or a large part of me! No stopping now! Hugs Lana Mae

[Teresa]

Kairi,
I made one promise to my wife which I intend to keep and that is my dressing isn't going to cost a fortune. I now have my pensions and my wife still chooses to work. We've had many arguments over money , so now I let her run the show, it's what she does best and is very good at it. I've agreed to recieve an allowance, at times it is restrictive but it does give the restrictions I need to keep my dressing in line. I mostly buy from charity shops, I'm totally happy with that my outfits work out fine , if I looked like orphan Annie I wouldn't do it but the comments I get are very nice so everyone is happy.

Throwing money at dressing doesn't make a shade of difference when dealing with the need to dress, the thing many of us need more is the freedome to dress as we choose , money can't buy that .

[DIANEF]

Have to agree with Teresa, to me time is more precious than any amount of money.

[sara66]

Having money is good, but I still had a good size wardrobe before I had any solid financial stability. You just have to chose wisely. As far as time to dress, I had more time to dress when I had little money but was still single.

Sara

[Brandy Mathews]

I don't think that it has a thing to do with how much money a person has at all. Had very little income when I first started, about 25 years ago. Things are a lot better now, income wise. I still love a good sale though, lol.
Bree ;)

[Jenny22]

For me, money doesn't make a difference. I retired at age 60, and having had reasonably good financial planning, I am comfortable. However, except for my wigs and beautiful silicone girls, my CD spending is frugal. I'd love to have $400 silicone hip, thigh and butt adornments, but refuse to do so due to their cost.

[StephanieM]

In a way I believe that crossdressing is related to prosperity on some level. For example if we all were farmers struggling to just get enough to eat, we probably wouldn't have time for things like this. This is a first world activity in my opinion, and since we live in relative wealth to many other countries and our ancestors we have been able to peruse this.

I do believe those with more income can devote more resources into dressing. Those with less make do with what we can get on a budget.

[Jenn A116]

I can't imagine how there would be any connection between the two. Yes, crossdressing does require spending money on things you might not otherwise have bought but otherwise there isn't any relevancy that I can see.

[Alice B]

Money is not the motivation. But, I will say it makes the pink fog thicker

[SHINY-J]

Although, I have a stable, solid and well above average salary job that I've been at for well over 10 years, my dressing has made the financial situation SIGNIFICANTLY tighter... it seems I'm always having packages delivered to my doorstep rom my online shopping binges.. to be honest, I think I recently tipped the gurly wardrobe to guys wardrobe ratio to the femme side a few months ago... and my collection keeps,growing and growing!

[Nikki A.]

I live paycheck to paycheck also, The desire to dress has no correlation. I still dress and go out, but I try to keep it reasonable. I shop at thrift shops or when things are on clearance. The only quality things that I'll pay extra for is make up

[Aunt Kelly]

All the responses about money does not matter, does not buy happiness, etc. are right, to a point. but the OP is asking specifically about the preponderance of participants here who at least appear to be well off enough to indulge themselves in a second wardrobe, including non-standard items like wigs, forms, etc. Even the most modest of such collections is truly a luxury to many. So I would not be so dismissive of the OP's observation.
That said, Ilene also makes a good point. Being retired changes lots of priorities. One no longer has work-related expenses, possibly freeing up some funds. And one certainly has more time to indulge in being pretty, so I'm sure that contributes to the perception. I will also add that haunting the thrift stores is a very popular adjunct to cross-dressing, and a frequent topic here, so looking good can be done on a budget. And yes, it is easier when you're not worrying about paying the bills, etc.

[Teresa]

Kelly,
Many of us have to consider does the outlay justify the amount of time we actually dress. OK it's a different question for TSs perhaps. Unless we really need to balance our body shape forget the expensive padding , forms can be made from many things to give a good a good bust shape, the fact they have nipples is irrelevant , if no one sees them . My wigs have come from various sources and none of them expensive and not all new.
I know there is another side to this question some do treat it as a hobby, one they totally indulge themselves no expense spared. That's fine but to me it's not a hobby, or an act . It's a need I have to live with, money doesn't change that feeling, the female part of me has the same inclination as any GG , feeling good putting outfits together , shopping carefully and maybe trying to watch a budget and still look a presentable woman . Being told you look good is an enjoyable bonus, and sometimes totally unexpected, it's being seen and accepted as a woman that is the ultimate goal, not how much money you splashed out on something .

[AutumnNC]

When I did not have much money, I was simply more thrifty. When ebay was new, I could snatch up a quality outfit for a great price. Now that ebay is not so much buy from owner, it kind of faded for me.

Now that I can afford a few things, I buy a lot from amazon. Money does help to get the things you really want. No doubt, but not completely neccesary.

[Aunt Kelly]

Teresa,
Please don't think I don't understand that "need". I am spared that experience (mostly) but I certainly understand it. The OP's query seemed aimed at those who indulge in dressing as an optional activity.

[Teresa]

Kelly,
Sorry about that , I still have a problem with it being a hobby to some people !

[Invisible Emily]

I wish I was retired with cash. I'm a poor college graduate with lots of loans to pay off. I didn't even start dressing seriously until after college so I don't think money was on my mind during that time.

[Beverley Sims]

Those with money and dress occasionally are probably hobbyists. :-)

Most I have seen here have a deeper problem than that and are also less wealthy than the folks you have seen.

Kairi,
It will take you at least a year of being here and replying to posts to see the wide spectrum of people subscribing.

You have probably been selective in your replies because they are the ones that interest you, after being here a while your interests will widen and a whole different range of people will create interest for you.

[CarlaWestin]

Kelly,
Sorry about that , I still have a problem with it being a hobby to some people !

Hobby is just how I would explain it to other people. It saves for having to divulge into long explanations about how gender really works.

The money thing. I've always had some kind of occupation with an income since I was 12 years old. And I plan on working at least five more years. I've spent many hours at night in classes to advance my education in my field and even had my own business at one time. Along the way I've collected enough credits from various pensions to seamlessly retire without a break in income. On the other side, I've been careful with managing money and kept everything in perspective. The whole CD thing was just along for the ride.

[rhonda]

Money isn't the reason , it's how you think , if you do it one time then another and you like it , welcome to the club you're all in and here to stay and you can take that to the bank

[irene9999]

I find that having some disposable income does give me temptation to go out and buy a nice outfit or makeup but I'm sure the temptation would be there even if I was broke. Back when I was a broke college student I rarely dressed though so maybe it does factor into it a little bit

[SometimesKairi]

Some very interesting replies here

If anyone was offended, then none was meant.
Just making a view from what I have seen.

It must be a controversial subject as 50 replies for one of my posts is wow!

[Krea]

Hi Kairi,
It is possible that some of those who are retired may have more free time for contributing to the forum discussions, or that those who have more money may have more lavish wardrobes, but that doesn't necessarily mean a greater desire to dress.


Kairi,
I made one promise to my wife which I intend to keep and that is my dressing isn't going to cost a fortune .
Teresa, this is something which i had to reassure my wife about when i came-out to her recently. As well as her worries about exactly what i might want to wear, people finding out etc , she was concerned that i might start spending money we can't really afford on new things, which i would only wear in private anyway.
Fortunately, i recently received a generous sum of money for my birthday from relatives, who said "Get yourself some new clothes with it!". As they don't know about my cross-dressing, i can't imagine what they would say if they knew what i want to buy haha :)

[Barbara Jo]

When all is said...

It has been sometimes said that how 'far' one goes with their CD / TS feelings often depends on their opportunities to pursue it.

Money can simply often give one more opportunities.... with anything. :)

[Lacy PJs]

As with almost everything, there is a level of practicality... and the urge to splurge once in a while. While I'm sure that those of us with a sizeable income probably get nicer things and probably do so more often, it is probably all tempered with some practicality.

I would like and could afford a tux but would it be worth it if I only wore it two-three times per year? Probably not so ther isn't one hanging in my closet. If I had a lot more money OR would wear it a lot more often, then the circumstances would be changed and my decision probably would be as well.

Lacy PJs