Crossdresser shopping in the UK?

[Jack123]

Hi all, Firstly some background. I'm an international student currently in Bristol , UK. So since i'm away from home and family i'm taking the time to explore my feminine side. I've bought some lingerie online but they didnt come as expected and also from what i hear on this site, nothing beats going the thrill of going out in person to shop. The thing is, i'm a new cross dresser. So any tips for first time shoppers? Do's and Dont's? I've read from some users about emailing the shops beforehand to let them know. Anyone had good results from that? What are your experiences? What if i'm also hoping for feedback and advice from the SA? Cheers girls.

[Micki_Finn]

First: DON'T get carried away. You are a student so I assume you're on a limited budget. It's really easy to overspend and get yourself in trouble. Don't know if Uni in UK is like here in the US, but over here they hand out credit cards like candy to college students. DON'T fall for this. They say they're trying to help build up your credit, but in reality they are preying on college students who tend to be fiscally irresponsible.

As for the actual shopping, just go out and do it. No need to call ahead or anything. Just go out and SHOP. Retailers don't care what you're going to do with their wares as long as you pay them.

DO know your general size before you go shopping if you plan on trying anything on. The only thing that might upset a retailer is if you try to squeeze your size 16 butt into a size 6 dress, as they do have to protect the merchandise from damage

DO be confident. If you're super nervous and slinking around the shop you can look like a shoplifter.

[Teresa]

Jack,
To get over the problem of shopping for myself I used the usual ploy of shopping for my wife . I worked out my own measurements and wrote them down so when I asked the SAs in the shops for help I gave them the list and asked if it was wrong they would keep the receipt so the items could be exchanged, it always worked . Now it's not a problem I just ask to use the changing rooms , OK it's usually charity shops anyway and I've shown many of the SAs pictures of what the outfits look like when I go out dressed . ( Like the leather skirt in my avatar .)

Shopping may have a different meaning if you dress at home and don't intend to go out, yes it can be a thrill but now I'm trying to put outfits together on the basis of going out socially . Online shopping is a pain if you don't have a safe delivery address, I have used Ebay suppliers that do click and collect at Argos, that has worked well.

[SometimesKairi]

Just go and buy it. Deliberately ask for help. Push them boundaries :)

[reb.femme]

Shopping in the UK is a breeze. Personally, I prefer to shop when I'm dressed but, it isn't a problem when drab. No laws getting in your way in regard to buying girl things. Credit is easily picked up here too, so beware the store card. :heehee: Epic place for a great night out Brit style. :devil:

Bristol is my second home. A couple of friends helped me out during a very dark time emotionally, so a large part of my heart will always be there and with them.

Becky

[DIANEF]

Agree with every else, shopping for femme stuff is no problem, once over the initial feeling of nervousness or embarrassment. SAs are just interested in a sale and the majority are helpful if you want to try anything on. So, head up , have a good idea of what you want and of what size you need, and you'll be fine. Oh yes, stay away from any credit they offer you!

[faltenrock]

Hi there and welcome.

I've been going out dressed for about 20 years, only about 9 years ago, I started wearing breast forms, a wig and full make-up, do my nails...

To tell you the truth, going out dresssed for shopping or what ever one might want to do can be very addictive - and fun. Actually, I never buy anything as a guy anymore. Shopping only works for me if I'm fully me in female mode.

Anyway, I never call or e-mail any shop before I go there, that doesn't make sense to me. My experience when out and about are really good and wonderful with no issues in many years.
I suggest that you work on your look and improve as uch as possible and start in small places, small villages, perhaps just a supermarket. The world will soon open up to you.

Good luck

Doreen (Germany)

[Rhian]

Bristol is one of the most liberal places in the UK and you should have no problem shopping for women's clothes. Just be aware that while sales assistants won't judge, other students probably will.

[Swottie]

I agree, it sounds weird to email or call a shop in advance, it would only give the staff something to gossip about.

A university town is probably a good place to shop since people generally expect students be strange creatures anyway, so no one would bat and eyelid even if you told them the stuff were for you. Heck, if I were 18 and living away at university now, the first thing I would do is get my ears pierced. Enjoy student life, it will either never be the same again after you finish, or it could be the start of a new way of life that you'll enjoy for a long time, and that's not just dressing, it's work and everything else... remember you have a choice, don't sell your soul for a few quid, do what you feel is right.

[Jack123]

I see. Thanks girls for your advice. I'm planning to cheat somewhat and go shopping this Friday at Anne Summers. I'm thinking since they sell sex toys, they're probably more used to kinks and fetishes hence i wont be laughed out of the shop and also take the time to buy a sex toy ;P. reb.femme? You mentioned Bristol is your second home? Are you still living here? Thanks Micki, you are right in saying i'm on a limited budget. Thanks Swottie, definitely wouldnt sell my soul for anything. Currrently in an explorative phase. ;)

P.S any review on Ann Summers? Go? No go? Overpriced? Not good material?

[Katie Russell]

Hi

I once went to a personal shopper at Debenhams. It was a great experience. You have your own private changing room. You sit there drinking tea whilst the shop is brought to you. Your personal shopper will help you put together outfits that suit you so no wasting money! They can also help with bra fitting, sizing etc.

It's a little less nerve wracking and more relaxing than wandering around the shop, especially if in drab. My PS helped me with make up and even took me out to Boots to buy some!

Personal shoppers can be booked on line and quite a few of the big shops now offer the service.

Katie

[HollieAJ1986]

Hey there!

Bristol is a really chill place, lots of places you could shop depending on what you are looking for really.

Hollie

[Helen_Highwater]

Hi,

I would steer clear of Ann Summers. It's not what GG's wear in their daily lives. Best places are the likes of M&S (especially for Bras and knickers), Debenham's, Next, Top Shop, get the picture? If what you bought online didn't work ask for a bra fitting to find your band size. If you have forms take them and they'll work the cup size out. If not opt for a B or C cup if you're looking for a fairly modest look and buy the forms to fit. Ebay has loads of cheap forms to get you started.

You perhaps need to think about what is your style going to be. If you're a slim build some of the more boutique shops will have clothes that will fit you as often they don't go above size 16 but they do target GG's in the mid teens so you could end up looking out of place even being that little older.

Leggings and tunic tops are common go to wear for many young GG's. Cheap and versatile.

As for SA's. I've always found them to be helpful. many are paid a bonus on what they sell so it's in their interest to be helpful. Makeup? Go into any large department store, pick a brand and as the SA to advise on what would suit your complexion. They will sit you down and give you a make over but be prepared for the sales pitch, "So will you be taking the foundation, blushers and bronzer?" "That'll be £30 please"

[Jack123]

Hi, the reason i thought of Ann Summers is I'm thinking of getting some sex toys from them as well. And the lingerie that they offer from their website looks pretty cute. And also they sell sex toys so chances are they're more accepting of cross dressers. Despite not being what GG's wear, how would you rate their lingerie? And also to diverge from the main topic abit, what do you thing about their sex toys (not sure if allowed to ask about this)?

[tvhelena]

Just shop as though you're shopping for a partner, if you're worried about them thinking it's for you. In my experience, most shop assistants know straight away if it's for you or your partner.

Another thing to do is get on to eBay. Lots of places do click and collect at Argos now. You can shop with almost total anonymity.

And yes, steer clear of Ann Summers. Their stuff is dreadful.

[Helen_Highwater]

Sex toys. Go online, the choices are vast and likely to be cheaper than Ann Summers ( not that I've ever bought any you understand).

[DIANEF]

LoveHoney is good for that sort of thing, so I'm told.............

[Lorileah]

Um...OK...let's keep this PG please :)

[Beverley Sims]

As a guy or girl shopping in the UK is great.

Scotland seemed a little reserved but most of my exposure was in London, I was always asked questions and at some boutiques it was don't get dressed yet... try this or try that. After two or three hours on some occasions they were able to pry another fifty pounds or so out of me.

Yep! I had pounds of fun trying on all sorts of clothing. I think my favorite garment was an inflatable bra which you could blow up like a balloon.

Love the UK for shopping.

Lovehoney......
I think you have been watching too much TV. :-)

I never watch the show....

[DIANEF]

Lovehoney.....I think you have been watching too much TV. :-)..

No,. I haven't, there is such a website, in the UK at least.
I've been shopping today, went in drab but bought some tights and make up. Not a flicker of a response from the SA.

[valerie anne]

You can drown in lovely sexy, lacy bras in M&S.

But don't let them fit you. They use some old method whereby they add 4" to your under-bust measurement to get your (wrong) size.

Instead, measure your under-bust, then across your nipples. Add a cup size for every extra inch. So 36" under to 37" over is 36A, 36" under to 38" over is 36B etc.

If you do that, all the M&S bras will fit very well. They may be a bit "firm" on first wear, but will settle into comfortable and snug brassieres.

I wear M&S bras all the time. I even posted a review about my balconette being perfect for a small-busted crossdresser, but it got deleted.

[MissEllie]

I've bought some lingerie (stockings + underwear) from Ann Summers in the past and although it's not the best quality, I've never personally had a problem with it. The biggest problem with Ann Summers for me is the fact that it's overpriced.

[paulinescotlandcd]

I'll just second the Anne Summers thing, por quality and over priced. I recall buying a few things (a couple of breast fillets, now cheap as chips on Ebay and much better) way back in 2000 and never went back. Yes, do not worry about buying stuff in shops like M&S, Next, Debenhams, they all want the stuff to head out the door. You have landed lucky living in Bristol. I reckon on my Facebook account half of my CD friends must live work and dance the night away in Bristol. There must be something in the water down there.Contact me via Facebook and I can tell you where to head for your first "thirsty Thursday".

[JennykBailey]

Keep an eye out for marks and Spencer regular sales. Amazing prices can be had especially when they get down to putting yellow price stickers on. My wife and I have got some unbelievable bargains over the last few years!

[susan54]

Once again I feel the need to defend Scotland. Shops that are not happy to serve you as they would a woman are very rare indeed. I shop all over the country and my favourite shops are all boutiques in small towns and villages. And there are ones that seem very straightlaced that turn out to be very nice. And all this includes shopping as a man as well as shopping fully dressed. Remember we are a country where most of our political leaders are gay or bi - Scotland is way more liberal than most countries.

[CherylFlint]

I show the SA a picture of Cheryl and ask them if that would be a problem.
The thrift stores are the best.
The only items I buy new are Jodee bras.

[tvhelena]

Once again I feel the need to defend Scotland. Shops that are not happy to serve you as they would a woman are very rare indeed. I shop all over the country and my favourite shops are all boutiques in small towns and villages. And there are ones that seem very straightlaced that turn out to be very nice. And all this includes shopping as a man as well as shopping fully dressed. Remember we are a country where most of our political leaders are gay or bi - Scotland is way more liberal than most countries.

Totally agree - my experience of shopping anywhere in the UK (Glasgow, London, Manchester, Liverpool) has always been fairly easy. Of course, it's a little nerve-wracking, but the shop assistants generally want to do their job. I recently purchased a Henry Holland dress (oddly, this was for my wife for her Christmas) and the shop assistant jokingly said "is this for you?" (she was genuinely joking, I had my daughter with me at the time) and I just laughed it off.

I was shopping in John Lewis in London a few years back, looking for a new bra for myself, and the shop assistant asked if I needed any help, but I politely declined. She came a little closer and said quietly "if you want to try anything on, just let me know, we're very discreet". Of course, I was embarrassed - but I now wish I had taken her up on it.

The thing to remember is that you're not doing anything illegal or perverted - you're making a perfectly valid purchase. Of course, it is down to the individual shop/store if they're comfortable with you trying items on. Remember, there's a lot of bold weirdos in the world who would do this sort of thing for other reasons. Just don't give the staff any reason to suspect that you're not doing things for the proper reasons and you'll be fine.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Hi Jack, welcome to the forum.

Department stores offer anonymity and frequently indifferent sales staff who are so bored that they barely even glance at you.

Check for returns policy, or be brave and ask to use a fitting room. Obviously intimate items can't be tried on, and may not be returnable, so buy underwear on the generous size, unless you like it tight (I do).

Above all, think of it as something fun and don't project an air of fear or shame- if you are vulnerable to those emotions. If it's stressful, go back to ordering online, and again first check the returns policy, and oversizing is safer than undersizing.

Let us know how you get on!

[reb.femme]

...reb.femme? You mentioned Bristol is your second home?...

Sorry Jack, I didn't see your message to me in a following post.

One of those names, you don't call out on a plane, "Hi Jack".

No, I haven't lived in Bristol since 1998, but my heart still resides there, in part. Sadly, I lost someone and moved back to London as a consequence. Epic memories of my time back then and revisited for work just last year. Met a local group at The Palace pub, Old Market, Bristol. I can always pm a contact if needed.

You'll enjoy your time there, guaranteed.

[Rachel05]

I went shopping last night for new bra and panties and I needed some new hold up stockings too, I had looked on line for anything that caught my eye and jotted down the details of what I wanted

I went to the shop, had a look and couldn't find what I was looking for so asked a female shop assistant that was working in the lingerie department, she went and looked with me, couldn't find it so checked on her computer screen, then she knew what we were looking for, she took me over and found the right bra, checked the colour and size for me, said how nice it was and went on her way, she was lovely and there was no hint of anything other than a super helpful sales lady

Went to the till, paid for my purchases, the lady checked the sizes were correct and had a nice chat with me, no hassle, no silly comments, just a real nice relaxed shopping trip and I was very pleased with my purchases

[HollyGreene]

If you know your size, an easy way to shop is in the supermarkets. Larger Tesco, Sainsbury and Asda stores sell clothes. Pick what you want and go to the self-service checkouts. M&S have self-service in the food halls, but there's nothing to stop you buying clothes via the self-service. I've done it loads of times.