Can you go backwards

[Mark/Rebecca]

I have been a busy girl lately and with the help of a GG dear friend have a much more thought out wardrobe, wig nails and most dramatically forms. As I increase my frequency and intensity of dressing i wonder if I could ever go back to the stage where I am shoving rice in a sock or dressing inappropriately and mismatched for my surroundings. I am concerned as I feel myself creeping into my male self more and more. So my question to all of you is whether you could tone down the level at which you dress (not use forms or makeup or something as important to us as that) and be happy with that, or is there only moving forward, stagnate or purge at this point?

[Allisa]

Try to dress more androgynously, it works for me. Than when you want to go expressing one way or another it's a small leap. Don't purge you will hate yourself later on. You can go as far forward as you feel comfortable, there are no real rules to self expression.

[DIANEF]

I've always tried to move forwards with my dressing. I am my own worst critic and whenever I see myself dressed I think, could I have done that eye shadow better, is my hair right, do my shoes go with my outfit...... and so on. Retrograde steps are never good and as an all or nothing dresser I constantly want to improve what I have.

[Tracii G]

There you go thinking to deeply about all of this.
Just because you do one thing doesn't mean the other thing you used to do has to stop or change.
Dress as far as you want and if you feel the need not to dress completely then don't.
I'm more a mix of both male and female sort of androgynous I guess you cold say.
There are no rules in any of this so don't worry about the small stuff.

[Karen RHT]

I'm not where I want to be yet so no...I can't see myself toning it down.


Karen

[Rachelakld]

Often gone out without forms, make up or wig as a progress to an age of "not caring overly about other peoples thoughts"

The down side when I take selfies, is I see what everyone else sees - a crazy old man - but it's still fun.
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[Mickitv]

I absolutely agree. DON'T PURGE!!! I have regreted every purge I did because the purged clothes and shoes were so cute and lovely. I also like the recommendation to dress androgynously.

[Lana Mae]

It comes and goes like waves or the tide! DO NOT PURGE! Ever! You will regret it! Dress as you feel! This is your journey-enjoy it! Don't sweat the small stuff as someone said! Hugs Lana Mae

[docrobbysherry]

What is forward and what is backward? When I started dressing I just threw on nylons and watched TV with them on all nite long. I did that or put on a bra and forms nearly every nite.

Over the years that was no longer satisfying and I began dressing less, but all the way. So, is forward dressing 3 times a month but to the nines? Or, is it throwing on nylons and forms 3 days a week?

I have no idea------------:brolleyes:

[TrishaLake]

For me I have to put the time in , I love the process and then just being me...dressed ...as a women.

[Ceera]

If I go as far as wearing the wig or forms, I have to do all I can to fully appear female, and to dress as well and as appropriately as I know how to do, including the makeup. I might well wear uisex or male clothes, but if I am trying at all to look female, I'll look like a girl wearing them.

In male mode, I do often wear women's jeans and shoes - most recently even including cork wedge sandals with 3" heels! I also have my nails done 24x7 and wear simple gold ball stud earrings in male mode. I don't wear women's blouses, or dresses, or skirts, or stiletto high heels, if I don't have boobs or long hair. No one has ever commented on the women's pants or shoes, and the only comments my nails get are complements about how great my nails look!

For me, the only stage I had prior to owning full proper silicone forms and a passable wig was using a 'two times sexy' push up bra plus silicone 'cutlets' to get my natural breast tissue to look like I had a C cup and decent cleavage, plus using a cheap but carefully selected Halloween store female wig. I could never go back to the super-cheap costume wigs while presenting female, and I don't care for the decidedly fake feel of the heavily padded bra when I am hugging someone or when I am touched. So no, if presenting female, I couldn't go back to non-silicone forms or to a super-cheap wig.

[Becky Blue]

Please whatever you do don't purge, as you will certainly have regrets later. Of course you can control yourself and hold back, but it is not going to change how you feel, it is kind of like you can run but you can't hide!

[tvhelena]

Only purge if you really, really have to - but the regrets will come if you do it simply to try and get back to whatever "normal" is supposed to be. We've all been there. I guess what you perhaps have to try and do is find more time to dress fully (or whatever your version of fully is). Often, the cause of regression is not having the time or space to do what you need to do properly.

[Angie G]

Never backwards for me Rebecca I don't kink I could.:hugs:
Angie

[Kate Simmons]

I feel that if we get to the point where who we are as a person is not affected by how we dress, that is real progress and shows self confidence. :battingeyelashes::)

[GretchenM]

To me it is not a matter of going backwards or forwards. Ideally, it is a matter of expressing who you are at the time. You always have choice. In terms of identity, someone who isn't quite female may also not quite be male. Actually the proper terms are feminine and masculine as male and female ideally refer to sex. That way we can keep gender identity and sexual identity from getting mixed up and confused. But, by all means don't purge if for awhile you feel you want to go back to expressing a more masculine identity. And as others have said, you can play the middle ground with some androgynous expression. I do that a lot. We are a versatile people. Far more versatile than most people. Periods of not being very feminine are not unusual. Don't interpret those as being a loss of what seemed to be, but just a temporary shift in your identity. It is who we are and we all experience it differently.

[sometimes_miss]

Like real girls, some days I go the whole nine yards of lace, and others, just bra, panties, simple skirt and top.
It's not an all or nothing deal every day.

[Fiona123]

I am stagnant now. I can only go forward. I will never purge again & will not go back.

[Cheryl T]

In answer to your question NO!
I could never revert to those early days of experimentation with water balloons, rice and whatever else.
I couldn't go back to having one outfit to wear for an hour every few days while sneaking around, hiding and fearing discovery.

I am who I am and that's that. I'm no longer in my closet, my clothes are and that's how it's staying.

[BrendaPDX]

For me the intensity changes comes and goes. It can be months (at the longest) or it could be every other day. I agree with others, don't purge! If you need to give it a rest, then take a rest. Plenty of time to wait for the tide to come back in:) Brenda

[Ressie]

Anything is possible.

[Alice Torn]

Ressie, In agree.

[Paigeturner71]

My gf definitely wants me to purge as my wardrobe slowly and inexorably slowly creeps into her space..lol!

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Damn! Said slowly twice! It's not really THAT slow! Haha!

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I get the last laugh tho when she borrows stuff from me...

[Teresa]

M/Rebecca,
Personally I don't like the in between look , the whole thing comes as a package, I'm much happier being 100% Teresa.

After last weekend being seen like that in what turned out to be a very busy hotel and not have any problems felt so good I can only think toning it down for a more in between look might have attracted more attention .

I'm definitely heading forward and not backward.

[CynthiaD]

You can go in any direction you like. Just make sure it''s really what you want to do. For me, I don't see that there's any more forward to go. and once you reach this point, there's no turning back. (Thank God!)

[Dana44]

First off don't purge. I would answer no for me. Yet, all my life I have croosdress and I am gender fluid. So if I get back to male for a time Then I know it will switch back to fem. I regret all of my old purges as you cannot replace some things that were of great value to you. So don't purge and possibly the girl side will come back at some point.

[Paigeturner71]

I'm fairly new to xcrossdressing but not to feeling feminine. But I am definitely not up on some of the terms or jargon as yet. What is girl juices? Like some kind of estrogen supplement? Inquiring minds...277541

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Girl fluid I'm sorry...lol

[Teresa]

Paige,
If you mean gender fluid , it refers to Cders whose gender floats back and forth, I'm bi-gender my feelings remain static .