Reading old diary

[Helen_Highwater]

If I remember correctly in was in 2012 when I first started spending extended time enfemme. Seven days away from home and having the freedom to dress and go out. Repeated in 2013 and then in 2014. It was on this trip I decided to keep a diary. One because I simply wanted a record of where and what I did but also to record my feelings and emotions. Also I wanted to make sure I pushed the boundaries and took my dressing further than the previous years.

A few days ago I revisited this diary and it was interesting to read some of what I'd written. At this point in my journey I hadn't yet shopped enfemme or interacted with either the muggles or a fellow cd'er. Certainly advice that has been written here appear in my scribblings.

"Early evening so people still about. learning to front it out and carry on owning the space". "Feeling more confident while at the same time a sense of needing to be braver".

"Parked on the promenade and after I stopped being chicken walked along the sea front to use the public toilets"

Also listed are MacDonald drive throughs, using self serve fuel pumps; "Getting fuel, other pumps in use but again front it out. See one muggle smiling at my expense. So what!".

The last entry for the week has me setting a goal; "I'd love to make contact with a local CD group. To be able to chat in a public setting would be both scary and wonderful". And next year I hit my goal.

For anyone starting out it can be a good thing to keep such a diary. I've only touched on the things I did in that week and being able to go back and remember those days gives me pleasure as I'm able to see just how far I've come and the experiences I had in traveling to get where I am.

[kimdl93]

Interesting to have those entries to look back upon. Never having dared keep a diary for fear someone might read it...this site is the closest thing to it for me. Its sometimes amusing, and other times disturbing to look back at one's words/thoughts/actions from the perspective of time.

[Teresa]

Helen,
It's a good way of organising your bucket list.
I must admit I started a diary when I first came out to my wife, I was determined to keep it up but it made dire reading it added to my depression then , it wasn't serving any useful purpose so I threw it on the woodburner, it actually served a useful purpose then it kept me warm for a few minutes !
I also have to admit eighteen months ago I would never of dreamed of crossing so much off my CDing bucket list , I've never had anything in my life that has made me feel so contented and comfortable, I guess it's because I'm finally dealing with a need that I have felt most of my life.

[DIANEF]

My 1000th post, what do you know....... I was reading through an old diary recently, one of those small 5 year things, and was struck by the infrequency of opportunities for dressing. For example,1993, 18times, 94, 12, 95, 9, 96 12 and 97 just five. I could live with that though I often mentioned the frustration of it all. Yesterday was my 67th dress day for the last year, sounds a vast improvement but I still have the feeling of wanting much more. I'm not sure whether diaries are a good or bad idea.