What inspires you, what drives you forward.?

[Bobbi46]

I have thought long and hard and pondered often about this subject.
First of all what drives me forward? my life that I now have, the friends I have here but also the obligation to support as others have supported me. But not forgetting why I am here. I am here because I have found a reason to live, to live in a feminine world in which I am happy and comfortable with. knowing that deep down there is no reason for self criticism as to the why and the what for. No one should criticise themselves because what drives one is the need for (at least for me) fulfilment in being totally en femme and feeling god at the same time as being content with oneself.
What inspires me? reading about all the sisters here who have reached a plateau way beyond me with poise and elegance. Displaying all that we/I look towards to try and achieve that level of femininity that some, me included dream of. Seeing photos of all the sisters here inspires me to move forward. It would be impolite to single out any one in particular but the levels of femininity reached.
Can I reach that high level of femininity? only time can tell.
But I will say this much, just being here is inspiration in itself! Where would I be without the feelings I have here? I care not to put those into words suffice to say that just the inspiration of being here is enough to drive me on wrapped up in a safe community that knows me and I know them. I love you all.

[Tracii G]

Well said Bobbi I feel the same way.
This site helped me to understand who I am and for that I m grateful.

[Rachael Leigh]

While I understand what you mean Bobbie for me I can't say this part of me that I've accepted because of this place drives
me, mostly because I have other things in my life that drive me further such as my faith. I can say I've learned a lot here
I've learned to accept others as they are and not to be critical of those who are different.
I've always hopped that if I can be positive to those here who have suffered and dealt with the many issues we as CD or Trans folks do then I can be happy that I've somehow made a contribution here and maybe that's my drive for being
here at least
Rachael Leigh

[kimdl93]

Perhaps its my upbringing, my own demon, or some other character disorder, but I really don't think self criticism is a bad thing. Self awareness begins with perceiving oneself as perhaps others might see us, and seeing/acknowledging shortcomings...whatever these might be. I think that the downside is setting oneself up for failure by aspiring to the unatttainable. I know I cannot fly, at least without an aircraft, (or a lot of thrust from some external source). Similarly, I KNOW i can't attain a "high level of femininity). I can only do so much and if I impose a higher standard on myself or others, I'm doing that same damned destructive thing that society does to women who seemingly fall short of "ideal"

that being said, I need to add in fairness, that this site doesn't compel me to be what I am, but it certainly has helped me see that, regardless of outward appearances, this "thing" is a part of many of us, and many of us are seeking to cope with it...at varying degrees of success. Any mistakes, any misjudgment, any excesses are strictly my own responsibility.

[Lana Mae]

This is a most wonderful place! Full of support for all! I do not believe that I want a "high" level of femininity! I am a plus size old woman! I do not want the beauty queen look! I want the small daily things! Like I just PMed some one here, to look down at my fingernail polish against my female jeans! There is just a certain feeling that occurs! Small things! This place and the members here inspire me and I will move on on my journey and grow into ...the real me...whoever that is! Hugs Lana Mae

[Bobbi46]

The main thing that drives me is as I said the life I have now ( not just connected with dressing) post divorce and other things outside of this forum. But within this community of ours is where for me a new level of lifestyle has been found.
And support of others is as important as having support for oneself. Each element of where I am and where everybody else is also close to my heart. The world I find myself in now is one to be cherished and cared for whether for myself or for others.
inspiration comes in many forms, from friends either here or in my case down the road for example, but in connection with dressing as is obvious my inspiration comes from within our community.
Inspiration and drive also combine to make lifestyle a much better thing.

[Laura912]

Bobbi, I have often wondered which of the two in your avatar represents you. Your thoughts are interesting. The old Chinese saying, "woman who walk down middle of road get hit by truck going both ways," sort of sums up where I have landed. Like you, this place affords a bit of sanctuary to survive the trucks. If 1941 was not my birth year, it is hard to say how things would have turned out. But as I learned from an early age, things got suppressed early, so now living "between" is the best place one get can get for me. You, on the other hand, can move further ahead. It really is enjoyable to see where many of you are going. I wish you all happiness and successes.

[Eveva]

Existential Dread, General Anxiety, Faith, My wife, the never ending quest for personal growth, therapy for grief, anxiety, depression. Overall just trying to find the whole me hidden in all the dark corners throughout the years. All of course with 1 parts hope 1 part love 1 part faith 1 part Murphy kicking down every door when least expected.

For me after a couple of close brushes with death due to health issues I've started to focus more on the journey and not the destination. So far it has been working for me. This forum gives me a safe space to interact with people that share a common bond. And that too adds to the drive I would have to say.

[Yoshisaur]

Not sure if this really makes sense because well I don't really understand it myself, but I feel that what drives me to move forward is learning and experiencing new things. There are just way too many things i've yet to experience, so many questions I still have that hasn't been answered. I thinks its the wonder of seeing what I encounter next in my life is whats driving me to keep moving on.

[Bobbi46]

Laura, to answer your question about my avatar think the part of me is the puppy asking for love and comfort.
How much further i can move forward remains to be seen. I think in a way we are all in between something or another (the drab and the en femme) my hope is to be totally out one day, when that day will come I cannot say. My journey is slowly progressing that is partly what drives me on. The inspiration comes from those that have moved much further on than where I am at right now. Appreciation of what one has also helps with getting to where one wants to go.

- - - Updated - - -

Yoshisaur
Some of the answers you seek will be found with us all here, you say you don't really understand it yourself but if you rethink it all you will understand where you are coming from and where you are going to. The going to is the drive we all we need the inspiration comes from those that have shown us the way and helps to point one in the right direction.
Being here helped me ti find my right direction.
Eveva,
Yes its also the common bond that we all have here. A safe and secure place to be and not to be judged.

[DIANEF]

To me joining this forum was a real eye opener, after spending so long in isolation I suddenly found there were people out there just like me, lots of them. I have been inspired by some of the great looking members we have, and as a result I have tried to attain a better level of femininity for myself. We don't always agree with each other, but we share that common bond which for many can't be shared anywhere else. I love reading peoples stories and seeing their pictures, I have friends and have exchanged messages with several members, where for decades before there was nothing. People have spoken of being on a journey, well I am on one too, and right now I don't which way it is going, but being here will help me on my way.

[Bobbi46]

I suppose if you look at it one way this forum is what drives us forward but there will always be that inner unspoken thought that desire or drive whatever you want to call it that will propel you forward to your goal. This forum is just the catalyst that is needed to help give us that drive forward. The exchange of thoughts and explanations and ideas that help us on the voyage of discovery. I think all of us here in one way and another provide inspirations for others either by threads, posts or by PM.
Diane, you talk of a common bond that is one thing and a very strong thing which binds us all together. This common bond that you speak of is also a driver of what I/we cherish here.

[Kate Simmons]

Nothing in particular really. I just do what I choose to do. :battingeyelashes::)

[Jodie_Lynn]

What Inspires me..... The people on this forum. The brave ones, the timid ones, the SO's &the GG's, the pathfinders and the trailblazers. Those who can, and those that wish they could.

And yes, I mean you, and you, and especially, YOU!

[Bobbi46]

I think we all need inspiration in one form or another in that inspiration provides ambition which in itself turns to drive to move forward. I am on a journey of discovery like many others to reach the ultimate end that we are striving to reach. A position of satisfaction and pleasure in achieving that aim.
Everybody here are the inspirationers , the drivers the providers for what I/we seek. The answers to be found and to be given. After all of that what are we left with? we are left with companionship, friendship and a mutual trust brought about by the safety of being her, if you like cosseted by this forum but also with the freedom to express our concerns and worries and to find an answer to that which troubles some of us.
But the main inspiration for me comes from being here among all the sisters here. I cannot think of a better place to be.
This forum inspired me to get over some dark moments in my life but the inspiration continued to envelope my desire to achieve the best degree of femininity within my grasp. The drive to do this comes with the inspiration. The need to be feminine to emulate feminism as far as possible.
I don't mean that we should push ourselves as hard and fast as we can towards that ultimate goal that would bring with it stress, I certainly could do without that but to be inspired by someone/something is the way forward.
As my journey continues on this path I feel a greater degree of contentment as dressing slowly and steadily occupies more of my life and brings about it a certain calmness, a feeling of being at peace with everything around me.

[Helen_Highwater]

I won't say this forum drives me forward but it has and does give me the confidence and support to progress and present a more femme me when out and about. Phrases such as "Owning your space", "Being confident", "Hold your head up" have enabled me to go out and loose (nearly all) my self consciousness.

As others have supported me I hope I'm able to pass on what I've learned and there is in truth a degree of satisfaction when you read someone's post about that first step out and you hope you played a part, albeit in some small way.

So perhaps a little belatedly I should thank all those who, over the past years, have helped me along on my journey. You are all wonderful.

[Angie G]

I think it's just the girl in me when dressed I just feel right. Just wish I could go full time but that can't happen.:sad::hugs:
Angie

[Bobbi46]

To go full time is still a dream for me, as it must also be to some of you and for some it will be just a dream. For me it is a hope one day. As Helen has said being confident and holding your head up is half the battle won and thus one moves forward.

[Nikki A.]

This site showed me that I am not alone and that we all are looking for our own satisfaction. As far as inspiration, it is trying to come up with a level of comfort between my two sides and hopefully eventually have the two sides become one. Where this will lead to at this point, I'm not sure, but I think if I was born 40 years later I'd probably be living as a woman. To much water under the bridge, too many responsibilities to go all the way, but I have been drifting slowly to the pink side.

[ginapoodle]

Self knowledge drives me and my Spirituality. I seek peace.

[Bobbi46]

Drifting to the pink side is a lovely way to put it. Drifting suggests a slow pleasant journey of evolvement. To have inspiration is a means to enable the drifting to arrive at a point at which one wants to be or where one feels comfortable with being. To take your words I am still drifting to the pink side but in a more deeper meaningful sense of depth.

[Helen_Highwater]

"Drifting to the pink side". I now have a mental picture of Obi-Wan Kenobi in heels.

[Lana Mae]

I loved that one, Helen! LOL Hugs Lana Mae

[sometimes_miss]

I was inspired to come here to share what I learned about crossdressing, because it was so hard to find the information. It took me decades to figure myself out. Nothing drives me forward. I just lean in that direction, and put my feet forward so I don't fall over.

[Bobbi46]

That's an interesting point actually, does that meant that Obi-WAN Kenobi is the true source of our inspiration? LoL
All this time I thought it was ourselves inspiring each other and getting inspiration elsewhere also. In a way it is a slow projection (drift) towards one ultimate goal and a journey that I don't suppose any body completed in a rapid manner. My evolvement was and is slow and gentle and continues at just the right speed. Shangri la here we come, in time of course.
In the meantime I have an appointment with Obi-Wan Kenobi!!!

[LeannS]

Drifting to the pink side that is a great way to put it !!
I thank each and everyone of you here to help me along my path and give me the strength I need like you say "OWN IT"

Thanks Bobbi for posting this

with much love

Leann

[Bobbi46]

Leann,
Thank you for your words.
A couple of recent events have made a huge difference to my "Pink Journey" (there you are another one to go with pink drift) notably today when after visiting a friend who had found out about me and was so supporting that after I sent an email thanking her understanding of me. The reply I got was "Bob you are a heck of a fella"!.
Words like this create inspiration and drive to continue ones journey. I previously thought that any overexposure could go horribly wrong I was so wrong with this, I have had such kindness sent my way from the few ex pats I know so far and now things are more open I hoping this trend will continue. For the simple reason of inner happiness.

[Nikki A.]

278988 Welcome to the pink side

[Bobbi46]

NikkiA
"welcome to the pink side" is a lovely way to put it. Also my reference to a "Pink Journey" is also relevant to all that we hold true and dear to our hearts. We are all I suppose on different levels on our way through life. Mine seams to be going in a very comfortable way indeed.

[Maria Blackwood]

Momentum and inertia as I charge through this dark and fallen world the gods have abandoned.

[Teresa]

Bobbi,
My driving force was for years unexplained , going right back to the age of 8-9 years , when my GD started and looking back AGP . For so long it was a continual gut feeling, now I finally know what those feelings were I can come to terms with them.
What drives me forward the need to be seen and accepted as a woman, some of the members who inspired me are no longer active members, Marcelle formerly Isha was the first person and friend to greet me when I joined the forum , I related closely to many things she said , like me she was in a mess when first joining and the forum drove her forward to come out and be accepted in the work place ( Canadian Army). She never held back in helping and guiding others, in some small way I hope I'm now doing the same thing for other members.
I will also thank Carole or sowing the seed that finally helped me come out to meet others socially , there is no doubt without the forum I would not be in a happier situation with my Cding. Being brave enough to commit thoughts to strangers and tell them exactly what makes you tick , to accept CDing enough to use a femme name and risk so much by revealing what you look like in reality. I can't see how I would ever have come out without the inspiration of other members here to drive me enough to satisfy my inner needs.

To me it's not pink fog , it's truly accepting something we were born with and finally coming to terms with it enough to admit you actually enjoy it .

[Sami Brown]

For me it is learning to face my fears. I have always been fearful of what others think, and taking small, uncomfortable steps has been empowering.

Sami

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o Bobbie,
Can you believe it? All these long winded replies?
All these deep thoughts about living our lives?
When really it's just finding that new set of heels, that
next new dress, or even that next new (dare I type it?)
pair of panties. (Sorry Adriana, wherever you are)
Here's to whatever comes next!
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Bobbi46]

yes as you say some long winded replies but if they weren't and were more concise the message would not come across properly. Yes all of our journeys are different and some take more explaining mine would for one but as Teresa said she gained inspiration and help from within the forum to move forward as I have had and now my inspiration is coming not so much from the replies to my thread but also from recent events close to me her in France of which were the subject of a separate thread. So inspiration can come from many different directions but the main and most cogent ones come from within our community.

[Teresa]

Kristyn,
Sorry about the the build up but others do need to know some are in the same mess I was and can get through it.

OK so you got to the enjoyable bit, I went and had a quick scan through the shops today, thinking on some outrageous heels , where would I go in them ? 4" silver heels and Fuchsia pink straps

[Bobbi46]

Teresa,
You are so right in what you say, peoples stories/history's need to be told because without them it can cut off from others thoughts and ideas which could inspire them on the journey.
These last couple of days I have been inspired by the acceptance I am getting from close friends just down the road. telling them has taken quite a burden from my shoulders. I am far happier now that people know. But like anything there is always more that has to be done.
Krystin,
Its not just high heels, dresses and underwear they in themselves do not make for inspiration alone. They may provide happiness in feeling good in them but is not something else or someone that triggers that need for inspiration, to reach out to find what one is looking for.

[silkiehosewearer]

Well said Bobbie so tru. That's really it tho the drive is 2 be the best u can be. The inspiration is seeing and helping ur sisters make it and become better which in turn make u better.

[Bobbi46]

Recent events have moved much further on my journey. My closest ex pat friends now know about the real me and although it was a feeling of elation it now gives me more inspiration and drive to achieve more in my search for pure sweet femininity, to feel complete.

[Amelie]

I don't get inspiration from anywhere. The only thing that keeps me going in life is the fear of death, and the fear of making a mess of things and becoming an invalid, or in a vegetative state. So I stay alive, maybe when that fear is gone, well maybe.

Don't get me wrong, I like reading things on the forum but I already knew who I was way before I joined and even before there was an internet I knew who I was. I like to think that some of my posts could be of some help but I don't think they are. Sometimes I think I live in another world compared to the stories I read. Not that this is a bad thing. Just different. I think there might be an educational gap, where I don't understand things. But I still like reading your stories. I like stories of girls at work, going to the malls, driving about, just plain ole having fun. While I'm not inspired, I enjoy reading stuff. I didn't join the forum for support. I lost much time in the 90's with bad things, I don't even remember the 90's. I came to the forum looking for old friends I lost contact with and thought they might be here. But I think they are all dead, I can't find them anywhere. I did find one person here that went to the same bar as I did but we only met at the bar and never went anywhere else.

PS-Maybe I move on in life is cause of my dog, I don't want to leave her alone. No one would take care of her. She keeps me going.

[Dana44]

Bobbi, yes this forum has given us inspiration. I had figured myself out before I came to this site. But I thought I was the only one. But this site opened my eyes and wow there are others somewhat like me here. Indeed inspiration flow though this site and we all lean something new all the time. That is the amazing inspiration of this site..

[Bobbi46]

There are so many just like me who dressed in a small way before they came here. Deep down I knew where and what I was but I still needed answers to so many things and I found them here, and that is what drove me on and gave me the inspiration to be myself and to achieve something in life as well.
To me having and getting inspiration from others is what makes my life so much better than it ever was.

[phili]

I'm inspired by my waking dream, the siren song of femininity within [the anima?]. I'm inspired by the beautiful and radiant, generous smiles on the Girl Mode pics for so many guys. I'm inspired by the depth and sincerity of the conversations and support here for everyone- the goodness of this community.

I'm driven forward by my anima, scratching to get out, wanting to heal the split, and to remake the world for all of us to be comfortable expressing ourselves as we are.