The Choice

[Stacy Darling]

So, I can pull off without trying, a Lagerfeld or Hilfiger look!

In the coming days I will be sitting and eating in some of our local restaurants, looking over North Beach Wollongong!

So! I can naturally appear as a suave male and people love me that way.

The confusion side of things is that I am adored whilst predominantly male!

Not wishing to present as male but knowing that presenting as male puts me on a sort of a pedestal, it's a bit ?

Choosing between male and Female?

[Sarah Doepner]

Stacy,

It all depends on what you want to get out of it. If you need your ego stoked and know that being the suave guy will do that, go for it. However, if you think you're going to go nuts without getting dolled up and going out as Stacy, even if you don't get the praise, do that. Wanting to get that same kind of praise as Stacy raises the bar on how you dress, do your makeup and presentation. At some point, unless you are amazing at all of that, you will be read and if there is praise it will be for your skill and taste and bravery. But it may be balanced by suspicion and colored by all the misinformation out there about our community.

It's a matter of deciding what needs you're trying to meet. Do you know what your priorities are?

[Stacy Darling]

Thankyou Sarah,
Ego is just another word for me and I do respect what you have said, You have really made me think!
Stacy

[ClosetED]

Why not take turns - each presentation taking a day back and forth? You can have the best of both worlds and compare?
Do blondes really have more fun?
Hugs, Ellen

[LeannS]

Stacy
present as female and have a great time!!
btw it is good to hear your out and about
take care of you
Leann

[Tracii G]

There is a difference between ego and confidence so knowing how to separate the two is important.
You need to sit and think what is the reason you need praise all the time or in either mode for that matter?
Do you feel inadequate deep down inside and try masking it with egotistical behavior around others?
I know in my outlaw days that is what my problem was. I felt like if I didn't project a brutal image they would "figure" me out

[Teresa]

Stacy,
If you remain just you it shouldn't be a problem.

I'm accepted for most of the right reasons in male mode and I'm accepted equally as well in female mode, I just feel so much better in myself dressed .

I don't worry about pedestals, you can hurt yourself too much falling of them off them or worse still being toppled off them !