PDA

View Full Version : Aceptance from sister - YAY!



Ceera
07-19-2017, 07:38 PM
In mid-May, I found out that my sister, who I believed I was not out to, has known since at least last Christmas about my activities as Ceera. (I later found that she first knew around last Thanksgiving). I was told by her eldest daughter, who I also thought I wasn't out to yet, and my niece also told me that "everyone here knows now" - meaning all of my family in my home town. The good news was that all three nieces and my nephew, and their spouses, are totally cool with my being female part of the time. The niece said my sister was 'still in shock' but would probably also accept this part of me, eventually.

So at that time I sent my sister a two page e-mail, starting a discussion on what she knew, and where I stand. She replied the next day acknowledging having read it, and promised to talk more on the subject when her personal life was less hectic. Preferably, as I had suggested, face to face.

Nothing on that topic for two months...

So I sent her another e-mail yesterday, more generically checking in and updating her on other stuff for the last 2 months, but also saying I still wanted to talk about the 'Ceera stuff'.

Today I finally heard back from my sister. Almost 3,000 words worth of thoughtful, and mostly accepting, reply. And the two most important parts of her reply were "You are my brother and I love you completely, and I always will." and "I do want you to be happy and continue your life as you feel comfortable." Yay!

She isn't ready to meet me as a female yet, and might not be for a long time. It is going to take her a while to become fully accepting. But she wants to understand, and is trying quite hard to educate herself about transgender issues and to evaluate and understand our conversation.

The worst part of it was my sister's confirmation that her husband now wants no contact with me whatsoever, and does not want me to come to their home. That will make it difficult for me to attend holiday celebrations that include my sister, nieces and nephew, and grand nieces. But I'm happy to avoid him, as we never have liked each other. And we'll work something out for the holiday stuff.

Rachael Leigh
07-19-2017, 08:06 PM
Ceera, awesome stuff, I don't think most of my family would ever get me as Rachael, my sister is aware of my gender identity issues but I'm just not sure seeing her baby brother in a skirt would work for her.
I'm glad your geting some acceptance

alwayshave
07-19-2017, 09:22 PM
Ceera, I am very happy for you. My belief is that most people know well before you tell them, especially if you have been out to others.

Pat
07-19-2017, 09:50 PM
Awesome that she's provisionally accepting and willing to become more so. And if "everyone [there] knows" already then you're spared a lot of angst, so good news in general. ;) You probably can't do much about the brother-in-law but your sister and nieces can probably intercede on your behalf over time. So congratulations!

Silkydog
07-19-2017, 10:50 PM
Congratulations Ceera! My favorite part was she is educating herself on transgenders. I wish more people would educated themselves before making judgement. We are born with some wires crossed and there is nothing anyone can do about it, except educate people it's ok to be wired a little different. Anyway take things slowly with her and enjoy being Ceera.

Dana44
07-19-2017, 11:33 PM
That is great Ceera, I wish my sisters would accept me. But I know where they stand on it. That is great news.

Amanda1963
07-20-2017, 01:53 AM
wonderful story cetera! I have two daughters and one son. only one of daughters know of my crossdressing and she fully supports me and we all spent last new years eve as girls! it was so much fun to be dressed as amanda. I am not planning on transitioning. I just love to wear women's clothes.

SaraLin
07-20-2017, 05:10 AM
It's funny how differently people react as opposed to how we think they'll react, isn't it?
When I first decided it was time to let family know about my feminine half, I was surprised at the reactions I got.

My mother's reaction was "Oh, I thought you were going to tell me you were gay". No big deal to her.
My sister's reaction was "I always wanted a sister."
My childhood best friend was "You've been a friend way too long to let this bother me."

LeannS
07-20-2017, 09:46 AM
Ceera
I am glad that your sister and your niece's will accept you.
I know that during the holidays it will be really tough for you also
spend it with friends

Leann

Stacy Darling
07-20-2017, 09:47 AM
Very happy to hear that you are being accepted by your family Ceera! I'm pleased if anyone in my family can accept me, most of them I just avoid, just like him! The people which accept you "Are your Family Now!"
Quiet holiday celebrations aren't so bad, only the first one!

Stacy!

Meghan4now
07-20-2017, 01:34 PM
Based on a limited experience, and some inference from typical sibling relationships, I think that the probability of acceptance by a sister is higher than most other relationships. Sisters don't have to own the "failure" that parents and wives feel that they do, and often were sisters in arms with you against the common enemy we you were young. But it's not 100% guaranteed. So this is great news!

My one sister that I confided in a couple of months ago would love to go shopping with Meghan. So it is really possible that this is a very positive development for you too.

Alice B
07-20-2017, 04:23 PM
Thatreally is great and takes a large amout of stress and guilt away. My entire family knows and accepts, which is wonderful. I try not to throw any of it in their faces and have been invited and have attended a couly of famiy parties as Alice. I hope things get that way for you also. Iy just takes time.