A thought about getting pierced ears

[CarlaWestin]

I've been wanting to get my ears pierced for as long as I can remember but, the stigma of the initial presentation has always been an obstacle. So, having pondered on this one forever, it finally hit me. Now I know a lot of you will tell me, "Just do it and never mind what people think." But, I gotta handle this my way. And, I really don't want to show up at work with my ears pierced just out of the blue. So here's my scheme. Well, maybe. I'm going to just let my normally clean shaven look give way to full facial hair. The works. And then maybe when I get the whole macho look going, that's when I'll get the ears pierced. That old guy biker look is quite the acceptable male image. And then as spring time approaches (you know, temps over 100 degrees) I'll just shave close again. Sound like a plan??

:straightface:

[Jean 103]

Yes it would work but REALLY. I had mine done a couple years ago. Again yes what you outline will totally work. Once spring is here, your ears will be healed and you will not have to wear them during the day. I had like 3mm round silver starter studs put in. They went with my short gray hair at the time. I had them done on a Friday after work so I would have the weekend to get use to them.

[Traci H]

Carla, your plan sounds quite sound and the logic is perfect. Personally I would have a hard time going back to that full hairy face. My plan is to get them done right as I retire. Sort of a rite of passage. I think people will think of it as a later in life mid life crisis.

[Stacy Darling]

No!

Don't Do it!

I have never seen any beauty in ear rings!, and on you I don't think so!

Your call but it's a no earrings from Me!

Stacy!

[Dana44]

Carla,Yes it sounds good and I had mine done a couple years ago.. I wear smaller hoops and have never had comments on them. Many males do their ears now and generally wear big looking CZ earrings. I guess to make a statement. I had my ears laser-ed and I stil have a few hairs I am plucking out. Hate hair on my ears LOL.

[Meghan4now]

Well, I guess it is a plan. Of course I just did them one day, but that's me. You can opt for just the goatee and 'stache if you want. That is suitably macho and biker-esque, and not as hot. Don't do duck dynasty, and especially the neck beard.

But for this plan to work, I'm thinking it's a 6 month minimum commitment, if not a year. Two months to get the beard respectable, two month wait, two months with the earing (minimum!). What happens next? Shave and leave the earings? Take both out and wear the earings away from work? Let them grow over?

Can you not dress for 6-9 months while you do this? Is being the man in a dress look acceptable to you?

Think it through.

[AmandaM]

You don't have to do the full beard, go Fu Manchu or an alternate Biker-acceptable style.

[Fiona123]

I wear clip on's occasionally. I personally would have a very hard time going back to the bearded look. I shaved the beard and stache in Jan after being bearded for 25+ years. That said I advise you to go for it!

[Majella St Gerard]

Why the charade? Just do it, it is totally acceptable for a man to wear earrings.

[Dana44]

Just do a fu man chu and that is easier to maintain and looks like a biker.

[Tracii G]

Why would you want to look like a biker?
I used to be one for real and they smell terrible.
I suppose that plan or lie would work.
After you get it done you are going to wonder why did I go thru all that BS trying to cover up wanting them done?

Oh and just for the record most gay men I know have gotees, soul patches and beards so you are going to look gay anyway LOLOL

[JenniferMBlack]

I guess it would work. Seams lime a long way around as it is pretty normal for guys to have pierced ears these days. I had mine pierced 25 years ago but don't always wear earinga, when I do I normally get oh you got your ears pierced. when I say yes over 20 years ago they might sayoh never seen you wear earinga before. but thats about all.

[Teresa]

Carla,
I love my earrings but having pierced ears doesn't really bother me . I've never looked on it as a credential for CDers, the only reason I might be tempted to having them done is because clippons can be knocked of too easily and lost .

Your plan would be a none starter for me, I just couldn't do facial hair, I hate missing a day not shaving .

[Micki_Finn]

If that works for you then great, but to be honest, I think it will have the opposite effect. The more dramatic changes you make in a short time, the more likely people are to wonder "what's up with him?" Just do it, get some simple studs, and let it go at that. To me, your plan sounds like waving Pom poms around so nobody notices your cheerleading outfit. :P

[Veronica53]

Carla THE PLAN will probably work and you have to get there in your own way. I just had mine pierced this past Wednesday and I work for a large construction company, not one bit of kidding took place and the girls in the office loved it.

[Lana Mae]

Carla, I just got mine pierced 2 weeks ago! My daughter said I looked like an older rock star(maybe like Sting?). At work, one person asked and I said it was on my bucket list! No more said! I just love them and am pretty sure you will also! Hugs Lana Mae

[Genny B]

Bucket list is a good idea! My Birthday was early in December and I got mine done in mid January. Two people asked me why and I told them it was something I always wanted to do when I turned 50. And they responed that took a long time. Yeah, it was a few years. The people I thought that would give me a hard time never said a word!

Genny B

[Sometimes Steffi]

I like Genny B's plan.

At work I would easily get away with saying it's a long overdue mid-life crisis. I really wanted to do it when I was in college but I was afraid of what people would say. Now that I'm older, I don't care what they say.

However, the big sticking point would be with my wife. Whatever I said, she would know it was about the crossdressing. I'm not sure how my adult daughter would react because she doesn't even know that I'm a crossdresser.

[Anne K]

Carla, it's a different world from years ago. People adorn themselves with all sorts of Tattoos. Nobody cares! Just do it. You'll have a couple people say something. Just smile and say, "Glad you like them". You'll love having them and changing them out. Right now, I wear studs in guy mode, but am going to wear rings. I,love big hoops as Joyce!

[SharonDenise]

I would like to wear pierced earrings but even at age of 71 I don't think I can do it. My daughters know I crossdress but it's DADT. They would know right away why i pierced my ears. I still substitute teach a couple of days a week. I don't know how the administration or the kids would take it.

[Aunt Kelly]

The plan will probably work, but you still might get a question or two, so you'll still need an answer. Might... get a question or two... That's all you're going to get either way. Why bother with the masquerade?

[sometimes_miss]

Why bother with piercings. Get magnetic backing, and some rare earth magnets. Double up on the magnets on the backs of your ears, and they hold quite well. For hoops, they make nice spring held hoops of all sizes.

[OCCarly]

I am a lawyer. I am 54. I got both of mine pierced in February. I wore earrings (jeweled studs) to court. I still do every day. No one has said a thing. Just get your ears pierced and don't worry about it.

[XemmaX]

do it! you can wear different earrings/studs depending on your gender presentation. women arent the only people with pierced ears..

[Beverley Sims]

Yes I think it is a plan...
A bit long and convoluted but if it pits you at ease why not.

[wanda66]

Long way for a short cut?.?. If this is how you need to move forward so be it....

[Karyn Marie]

Oh Carla, I know you said you have to do it your way, but I think you should just go for it. My wife knows about Karyn, and I told her this past December I wanted to get my ears pierced. She said go for it, and I did. I had taken a day off and she and I went to a local mall and into Claire's Boutique. I got them pierced. I am a campus safety officer at a public junior high school and when I got to work the next day the office ladies thought it was pretty cool and all the kids complemented me, and thought it was really cool too. I only wear posts at work, but have several sets of dangly, girlie, pretty, earrings. I love them when I dress, and love the look when I am wearing my wig. I am truly a girl, and would not have it any other way, except to add a couple of things and remove one other thing. Yea, you go girl, and don't hesitate. You'll love it.

[Krisi]

You are overthinking this. You don't need to pretend to be a "biker" for a few months to pierce your ears.

Get it done and deal with the people. Most won't say anything. Tell people they are not earrings, they are cell phone antennas and they work great. That should send them away.

Or, make up a story about getting drunk and losing a bet.

It's really none of their business and you can tell them that if you think that's the best answer.

[Rhandi Spencer]

Carla,
I do not know what type of industry you are in and I completely understand the concerns of what people will say. I go to a very conservative church and everyone is opinionated, that was my worst concern over even work.
My Son In Law made a big deal and a few other people but in general not a lot. I have taken the earrings out for church and then put them right back in. DON't Do that until they are healed.
I will not say jst do it. That is up to you and it took me years to get mine done. I still have a few people that don't understand, and that is ok. Most do not care.

Good luck with your decision and no matter what HAVE FUN...

Hiedi

[cdinmd206]

Do not grow a beard. Many guys now have both ears pierced. Just wear small studs during the week.

[Shely]

I have been thinking of doing it and last week my SO suggested when i retire next month i get an ear pierced. I think she was thinking of one left era, but i ma thinking of both. We will have to see which way it goes. I am not sure exactly why she suggested this, we have a quiet DADT relationship going on and she knows I have 75 dresses. Time will tell and i will let you know later. I love dangley earrings though. :devil:

[Angie G]

Do what feels right for you Carla. I had mine done and had no fallout over it hun.:hugs:
Angie

[Krisi]

My wife and I went to the Piercing Pagoda because she has an allergic reaction to most earrings. She got a pair of titanium studs and that seems to have solved the problem.

The lady also gave her some thin plastic tubes (sleeves). These go in the ear holes and standard earrings can be used in them. Possibly you could have your ears pierced and then replace the studs with the plastic sleeves for the healing period. This is something you would want to ask the people at the piercing place about.

Still, my advice is to get it done and "own" it.

[Diane Taylor]

Everyone has to do whatever way they feel comfortable with when it comes to getting their ears pierced so there is no simple answer. In my case I got both ears pierced and there was no fallout at work or in other social circles. Soon after that, I had both ears pierced a second time.

[Luci]

I got mine pierced last weekend. Been hesitant about it for years. After I got them done, no one I know has said anything negative about it.

[BillieAnneJean]

I would LOVE to have pierced ears. But my SO prefers not, and she comes first. And it isn't much on her part to ask that of me anyway. Marriage is a compromise and she certainly has done what to her is a compromise over CDing.

[CarlaWestin]

Well, it sounds like Bucket List and Just Get It Done are the clear winners. The real stumble will be the wifey reaction. Evidently DADT means nothing that even hints at femininity.
Although, I was swimming in the pool all weekend wearing cute little tight pink striped panties!

[Krisi]

Carla, the "wifey" thing adds another wrinkle to the situation. Why don't you wait until you see another male wearing earrings (like your waiter at a restaurant) and point ou7t his earrings. Then, depending on her reaction, you can say "I think I'll get my ears pierced like his."

[Barbara Jo]

This issue has be discussed ad-nauseam.. :)
Males with earnings in this day and age is a none issue and even hyper masculine males now have pierced ears.

Personally, I wear just 3mm CZ studs when in male mode.:)

[Genifer Teal]

The most relevant part of this thread is your wife's disapproval. It's about how she feels. If she feels you will look too feminine, that's all that matters. No amount of logic can change that.
It seems she is not ready for you to take such a big outward step. Tread lightly. Keep her involved in these kinds of decisions. You need to evaluate what compromises are right for you and perhaps not acceptable before the future is lost.

[curvious]

I had my left pierced 2x in the 80's cause I was cool and many. I just did my right today. At the bathroom sink. very little if any blood. a little pain, but not much really. I am waiting for my wife and daughter to see it tomorrow. I think it looks cute with my short champion booty shorts and my little racer back tank......

[CarlaWestin]

The most relevant part of this thread is your wife's disapproval. It's about how she feels. If she feels you will look too feminine, that's all that matters. No amount of logic can change that.
It seems she is not ready for you to take such a big outward step. Tread lightly. Keep her involved in these kinds of decisions. You need to evaluate what compromises are right for you and perhaps not acceptable before the future is lost.

Yep! You hit it right on the head.

[reb.femme]

...To me, your plan sounds like waving Pom poms around so nobody notices your cheerleading outfit. :P

Yep! 100% agree. I got mine done nearly 2 years back now, aged 55 with titanium ball studs and not a word said.

[leannejacobs]

I grew up in an era (80's) where most young lads had their ears pierced, me included, fortunately they never ever closed up and I take full advantage of that.

You do get very discrete plastic studs, try them.

[Stephanie Nicole]

I have been considering it for the past couple weeks now. I am not sure if I want to go that route yet. I do have several lovely pairs of clip on earrings that my GF has gotten me that I do wear when dressed.

[Krisi]

Once you get your ears pierced and get past the healing stage, you will wish you had done it years ago. The earrings don't hurt your ears and there's much less chance of them falling off.

[Stephanie Nicole]

Once you get your ears pierced and get past the healing stage, you will wish you had done it years ago. The earrings don't hurt your ears and there's much less chance of them falling off.

my issue is not the pain ( I had my ear pierced as a teenager a long time ago) it is more the reaction of my family (especially my father and brother) and the people I work with

[paulinescotlandcd]

Go for it, I think it is good plan. A few weeks of bristles is a small price worth paying.

[Barbara Jo]

FWIW...

People usually have more respect for those who are individuals.....those who have a mind of their own .

Whose ears are they..... yours or someone else's?

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Carla:hugs:, Please don't do like me and wait till you are 72 to pierce your ears,

I can't believe that I wasted so many years wearing clip-ons...:daydreaming:...

[Genifer Teal]

I stand by my other more relevant comment. Fwiw, wore clip on earrings once or twice. Extremely annoying. Did not wear them again for about 3 years till I pierced my ears. That was a long time ago. Very few comments. Well worth it, WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT.

[chelyann]

like Nike says = JUST do it ,, nobody cares and you will love it

[Traci H]

Yes, for many of us there are two dynamics involved. The world we live and work in and the world that involves our wives. At this point in my life, I couldn't give a rats behind about the first, but my wife's world is different. The wife radar is always on the lookout for signs that I am sliding into feminity and raises objections. It's not like I could just spread a little bondo in there and cover it up either.

[Erica Skifishski]

I agree that the plan may end up seeming a bit contrived, but IMO, the worst parts about the plan won't turn out as bad as some are suggesting. Funny comment about waiving your pompoms to distract from the cheerleader outfit. I LOL'd. I only got one ear pierced 17 years ago and abandoned it 16 years ago. Nowadays, I'd go two or none, so looking to do the other one soon. There are some very good looking man-mode earrings that a lot of regular dudes would get their ears pierced in order to wear them. Not just diamonds, but stuff for under 100 bucks. I seen several that match at least one pair of my cuff links. I think peeps at work would just be jealous cuz they're gonna look good!!!

[Cherylgyno]

Thank you Pauline. I just checked your Flickr vid. My wife has been pestering me to get my ears done. I think I am afraid that I will like it too much and want multiple piercings in each ear.

- - - Updated - - -

Thank you for all of the positive comments on getting pierced ears. Going to get mine done next week.
Only fear is that this will lead to getting multiple piercings in both ears.

[Sarasometimes]

Carla,
For a moment you had me nervous at
"So here's my scheme. Well, maybe. I'm going to..." I thought she isn't going to say "tell people I lost a bet! JK of course.
We all have to manage these things in a way WE personally feel comfortable with. My fear of trying your plan is that my wife would love for me to grow my beard again but I have told her I think a grey beard will age me, I can't risk her not agreeing.

[Karyn Marie]

I got mine pierced last December, and am so glad I did. I love wearing dangly, feminine earrings, but there are masculine earrings if the need arises. Get'em pierced, you will be glad you did. I don't get many comments, but the ones who do are mostly female, and they are all positive. Should have done this years ago.

Karyn