Where to Live?

[Krisi]

After reading a few posts bashing my native country, it occurs to me to ask this:

In your opinion, where is the best place in the world to live either as a transsexual or as a crossdresser (please specify)? Country, state, province, city or town, etc. And why?

[Jean 103]

For you it would hard to say. When thinking of a place to live there are so many factors to consider. For me it is easy, here. I grew up here. I thought if I came out and started living openly as a transgender person I would have to find a new place to live. It has been the complete opposite. Having history here has made acceptance and making new friends easier.

[Stacy Darling]

A lot of sense in what jean says!

This CD will most likely keep living not too far from Sydney Australia!
Reason being; I have lived here for 30yrs and know my environment and those in it so well that I can almost smell any non acceptance or trouble. On the other side of it I can see the acceptance and joy in others! I believe that I can better read the people within my own society!

So I guess that I know the boundaries of what I can get away with here, and know how hard I can fight back, and get away with that also!

Place me in your or another country, city or town and it would most definitely get messy, and fast!

I don't know where you live Krisi, I'll just guess it's somewhere in the Americas!

Bashful Stacy! :)

[Tracy Irving]

I don't see myself moving just to crossdress. I will continue to live where my friends and family are. Granted, I can always make new friends but I can't make new family. I know SE Wisconsin well, own my own business here and am quite comfortable.

Illinois, Colorado, Vermont, California, Oregon and Washington are some of the friendliest states for crossdressing but it just isn't worth moving at this stage of my life.

[Mafalda]

I could imagine Netherlands, or somewhere in the US as I can tell from your posts... It seems people in these country are ready to accept your freedom without too much judging. Not in Italy for sure!

[Krisi]

And yet we keep hearing negative comments from those living in the USA about the USA.

I live in the USA in the south. As a crossdresser, I haven't had any issues but it's not like I'm living as a woman or full time as a crossdresser. I suspect San Francisco, CA would be the place in the USA to live if crossdressing was a big part of your life. Or if you were a transsexual. Me, I'm fine where I am.

[LeannS]

Places I wouldn't go would be easier: Wyoming to small population and dam cold, Utah religious same with Idaho I would also include Montana in that also
I would stay to the bigger cities where people don't know one another and basically to each their own.

anyway my 2 cents

[Dana44]

In Texas it is conservative, Yet I have had no problem. So I am a Texas girl and I love it.

[Sarah Doepner]

I'm having the same kind of internal conversation. I live in a Salt Lake City, Utah suburb, I'm about to sell my house and will need a place to live, but it doesn't have to be inm the area where I've been living for nearly 60 years. However, that is where my entire support system exists; family, friends, doctors, financial, social and I even know most of the streets finally. But there are things I don't like about living here as well. The air in winter is bad, I don't like paying income tax on my social security and pension, once I sell my large house there is no way I'm going to get anything similar but smaller in this hot real estate market, and I'm always yelling at the television over local politics.

Somehow the fact that I crossdress (I get out here from time to time) and want to get out more has been a much smaller factor in making the decision than all the rest of the factors. While it's important to my emotional state, it's also very important that I stay healthy, connected and able to visit places where I can CD at will.

[Tracii G]

It's not so much where you live in the USA but there are people out there that think it makes a difference.
I have found acceptance in most anywhere in the USA and I have traveled a vast majority of it being a long haul commercial truck driver for 40 years.
Be nice to others and they will in general be nice back to you.
I would stay right where I am in Central Kentucky and see no reason to leave.

[alesha]

I have passing privilege so there's that and I wouldn't necessarily move somewhere just to be able to cd. For a brief period on my life tho, a lot of my decisions did revolve around the ability to cd.

Having said all that, I would definitely agree that a few cities in California (San Francisco, West Hollywood, and Long Beach) are easier. I've lived in all these places so I can attest to that but the problem with these cities is that there are pockets of neighborhoods where you did not want to get caught at. People are generally more accepting in these communities and it's easier to find other girls like us so there's the socializing aspect that's great.

[Tracii G]

There are areas in all cities that you wouldn't want to venture into CDing or not CDing thats just common sense.
I have a friend that lives in Long Beach and he says its a long cry from the great place it used to be.

I think it would be easier just to stay were you live because you know the area.
I have family that live in SF California and they tell me its a very class driven place to live.
If you have money you are part of the elite and accepted.
If you are working class or low income you are treated like crap.

[Teresa]

Krisi,
I was surprised to find the UK is not a bad country to be a CDer in. , I did think the US would be a freer environment but many members have more problems than I do. OK we could all name no go areas , it also depends to some extent on the individual's personality and I hate to say it but maybe how passable you are.

No matter what country DADT doesn't change very much, it's funny how predictable our wives/ partners are in accepting our dressing.

I'm only putting a few miles between my family and myself at their request I understand and respect their feelings .

[ronda]

You might want to try P town Mass very much a LGBTQ town

[Sallee]

If I was going to move somewhere strictly to satisfy my cd desires it might be San Francisco here in the US. It is a nice city and certainly liberal enough and LGBTQ friendly. BUt I think London might be fun as would Amsterdam. I would definitely go for a big city.

[Pat]

In the US, I'd say California or Massachusetts have the best legal protections for trans folks. I never gave international situations much thought but I'd think the Netherlands would be a pretty safe bet if you could manage the culture change.

But honestly, in most First World places (yeah, I know how arrogant that sounds,) it probably matters more how you live than where you live. I'm pretty friendly and outgoing and so don't have any problems. But I know folks in my general area who think they're virtually under siege and that mindset isolates them. If you live in a dark world, it's dark no matter where you are.

[LydiaL]

My most memorable cross-dressing experiences have been in Las Vegas, NV. And, I suspect, hundreds of others might agree. (Wildsider's Sin City Soiree & Diva Las Vegas, for example)

Sure is lonely around here!

[DIANEF]

My home city of Manchester is renowned for being LGBTQ friendly, we've just had a huge Pride parade, but there are certainly a number of no-go areas even for non CDs.

[Tracii G]

I would have to check the countries Like Sweden or Holland to see just how many Muslim migrants have come into the area.
Safety would be a huge concern no matter where I went

[Becky Blue]

Australia in general is a pretty accepting country specially in the larger cities of Sydney & Melbourne.. but like any place in the world you will always find some haters but the average person doesn't seem to care much.

[sometimes_miss]

No question. Either San Francisco, or closer to me, Greenwich Village, in Manhattan, NYC. Expensive, but you get what you pay for. More entertainment than you could ever ask for, every culture, Food? Again, everything possible within a short subway ride, if not a stroll. Crossdressing? Nobody cares. NOBODY.
The people are as friendly as anywhere else, but don't seem like it because to be friendly to everyone you meet would consume your entire day and you'd never get anything done, so, New Yorkers pretty much ignore everyone unless there's a reason to talk to them. It's not a personal dis.
One of the cities that truly never sleeps, if you're a night person like I am, that's a definite plus.
But a healthy six figure income is pretty much required if you want a decent place to live. If you're young and willing to walk up many flights of stairs, to an outdated apt, which is furthest from the subway, you might squeek by on $80K a year. Oh, and forget about owning a car. The parking and insurance is more than most places housing rent.
Oh yeah, lots of NYC sidewalks have a perpetual stink during the hot weather, that only disappears during a heavy rain. Once you live there, you sort of get used to it.

[faltenrock]

I live in Germany. I don't see any problem here in my country. I've also been dressed and out in other countries with no issue at all, such as the USA, Netherlands, Austria, Switzerland, France, Denmark, Spain and the UK.

It pretty much depends on yourself, your attitude and behavior, it also has to do with the way you dress and your overall appearance.

[Princess Chantal]

Acceptance of crossdressing has absolutely no importance on where I would consider to live or travel to.

[Bruce64]

Come to Toronto, Canada, very accepting here, our Head of State is a Lesbian, by the way I am a Muslim.

[docrobbysherry]

While living in Rite Wing OC in SoCal, I asked a hippie friend of mine back in the 60's:
"Why don't u move up to Northern Cal? There's more acceptance for folks like u there.":straightface:

I took his reply to heart:
"It doesn't really matter. Wherever u go, that's where u r!":eek:

[kimdl93]

Didn't someone say, No matter where you go, there you are? I have lived openly in Texas, and interacted with people up and down the center of the US. I lived openly in my neighborhood for more than 5 years...presenting as a woman. Never in that time, did I have a conflict. Maybe they were just scared of me...or maybe people are less judgemental than we expect.

[Krisi]

Thanks everyone.

The answers are a bit surprising but encouraging. I asked my question because of comments posted on this forum that put the USA in a negative light as far as laws, potential laws and attitudes. Of course I personally don't see this but I wondered how everyone else felt. Apparently the people who originally posted these negative thoughts either missed this thread or decided not to respond. Or maybe they have changed their minds.

[ellbee]

I've only lived in "liberal" New England my entire life.


And here I've had some of the most positive experiences, as it relates to CD'ing -- as well as some pretty close to the other extreme (including 2 near-fistfights... I might not be the biggest person around, but I can also be a scary-crazy bitch :D ).


Good & not-so-good people are everywhere. *shrug*

[daphne_L]

For most of the world, I think it maters more what kind of person you are: Either "the grass is greener" or "Home is more comfortable." For the rest of the world, even those without our issues would rather move to the other part of the world if they could, so obviously don't choose there. But if what you want is a more that the general politeness you find everywhere, you are more likely to find a community of like minded people in or near any one of the major cities in North America or Europe, or a few of the major cities on each of the other continents.