Birthdays - Which do you Celebrate??

[Paula DAngelo]

Granted this isn't a life changing thing, but with this being the date of my physical shell coming into existence and with being on vacation and having to much free time on my hands it started me thinking. As any who have legally transitioned, and any one who has seriously thought about it are aware the chance of your physical birthday and legally coming into existence being the same day is almost nil, in other words these days are almost always going to be two different days.

I know for me, the day that the real me came into existence is much more meaningful to me than the day that my physical shell came into existence. I will allow others to continue to think of my birthday as the day I physically came into being, but for myself the day that I started to exist as my true self will be the day that I consider my new/true birthday.

Now for legal matters I know that you need to use the date that you were physically born. What I'm wondering is those of you who have or are planning on legally transitioning which date means more to you. Do you celebrate on the day that you physically were born, the day that the real you came into existence (legally recognized as existing), or both.

Note: Anyone is free to respond to this, all I ask is that you state if you are speaking from actual experience, as an opinion based on having given this consideration due to plans of transitioning, or an opinion due to reading this post.

Thanks all

[Pat]

I will probably always remember the date I legally transitioned, just like I remember the date I started hormones, but my physical birthday is still my birthday. I've had an eventful life and many of those events are worth remembering -- I don't really disown any of them. I suppose I have a hard time singling a date out anyway.

My girlfriend, who transitioned 17 years ago, likewise celebrates her physical birthday but I know she also remembers the dates of her coming out to her family, her SRS, getting an F on her driver's license, etc. They happened at different times -- how do you pick one? Why not celebrate two? Or many? ;)

[Mirya]

I keep a written record of all the milestones in my transition, which thus far include the day I started HRT, the day I realized I'm a TS, the day I came out to family members, the day I went full time, the day of my legal name change, and the days of my surgeries. But I don't mention those dates to anyone nor do I celebrate them in any way. They're just a way for me to keep track of my transition timeline, sort of like how one keeps a journal.

For me, my birthday will always be the same, and that's when I prefer to celebrate it with friends. I don't celebrate any other transition milestones. I don't really want annual reminders of my transition. Once I'm done with my transition, I just want to move on and put this all behind me.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

im so different...

i have no idea of the dates...never kept a "log"(i did keep a journal...which reads like all kinda crazy)

i just never cared...i just wanted to get it over with ....which isn't so great when its such a complicated road that required lots of patience....

so my birthday is same one i had all along!!

[Starling]

I consider the date I joined this forum as my "second" birthday. All good things have flowed from that--and some bad, as well.

:) Lallie

[Megan G]

Only thing I celebrate is my original birthday... the day I came into this world. Everything else is insignificant to me and not worth remembering, let alone celebrating.

If you were to ask me when I started HRT, or came out publicly, or when I went FT or when my name change was.... I would shrug my shoulders and the answer would start off with "I have no idea" and would lead into a guess. Like really who cares?

The whole purpose of transitioning is to fix a birth defect and lead a happy life... remembering "milestones" of transition is just a reminder of this birth defect....same goes for people that only want to talk about trans related surgeries and the stuff that goes with transitioning. There is so much more to life...go out and live it. Spending so much time concentrating on what should be a private medical issue is just silly and a waste of time.

I prefer to concentrate on the future, not the past. I can't change the past but I most certainly can create an amazing future...

[Georgette_USA]

I only really celebrate my date of birth, NOV 13 1950. Always take a vacation around that time, Hate when work people want to celebrate it, Don't mind my age and freely give it out to people.

I have records of some events in my transition, Legal Name Change, Start to work Full time, SRS.

PAT,
what makes the Legal Date of Transition in all this context nowadays.
Back in the 70s, the date of SRS and being able to change most all legally, was what we considered that date. In some states that is still what is required for Birth Certificates.

My partner (hers was APR 2 1977) (I would call her my April Fool) and I would celebrate our re-birth dates for some years, But after 5-10-20-30, we didn't bother anymore. I always say when you count or remember things by decades who cares.

This coming re-birth date of SEP 13 1977, will be my 40th so it is a little more.

[Pat]

PAT,
what makes the Legal Date of Transition in all this context nowadays.
Back in the 70s, the date of SRS and being able to change most all legally, was what we considered that date.

Ah. I was reading it in what I guess might be called "New Age Transitioning" terms -- there are three transitions, not everyone needs all three; Social transition, Medical transition and Legal transition. I got all my forms gathered and changed my Social Security, driver's license, bank records, and arranged a date to meet an examiner to have my birth certificate modified all in one day (August 1st.) There are always millions of little things to update (all these years later, my girlfriend still gets the occasional bit of mail in the wrong name) but in my view I had managed the key ID's and so considered that the date of my legal transition.