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View Full Version : Sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do !!



Teresa
09-17-2017, 09:17 AM
For those of you who may be following the situation of my impending separation all hinging on the sale of my current home , all I can say at the moment is everyday feels like a week. the whole process is like watching a snail race ! To top it off I had to cancel going out Friday night because my wife had taken my car.

My wife had to stop over last night to child mind and then go directly to work, so I did get a good night's sleep in my nightie but unusually wearing a bra with my forms in. This morning ( Sunday ) I decided this girl needed some retail therapy, so I slipped on my suspender belt and stockings, panties and a short slip, slipped on some male trousers and shirt and headed off to the city twelve miles away. Parked in the shopping centre car park and headed off to see which charity shops were open. My basic need for the future is everyday wear, suitable jackets, skirts , shoes all the items you need to wear on a daily basis.

My first find was a neat fitted skirt just on the knee £2.49 after trying it I bagged it. Across the road I found a lovely grey real leather skirt reduced to £2.00. size 12, tried it , no it was nearer size 10. Headed on a found a neat jacket and some boot cut cord trousers, the jacket felt wrong the style was great but being a guy it wasn't long enough in the back, the cords were great but I left them both to try on a lovely sleeveless dress , I didn't have my boobs on so I knew it was going to be too tight with them . Finally stopped at my favourite shop , the Sue Ryder Retro shop , sadly they haven't sorted the autumn/ winter clothes so the selection of leather skirts weren't available . Instead I found a very tight fitting silk skirt with lace hem , not everyday but something special to go out in .

I headed back to the shopping center ,a report in a magazine gave good reviews on a perfume in Next but before I found the store became sidetracked in a HMV store and bought a cheap DVD copy of the Danish Girl.
Finally made it to Next and was looking for the recommended perfume when the SA asked if she could help, I made it obvious what I wanted and who it was for, no problems , she sprayed the back of my hand with the perfume, it was OK but not one for everyday, so she spayed several on different parts of my hand and arms , eventually the selection became confusing . Then she pointed out that the three I liked most were packaged in a pack of three , they were £8.00 each for 30mls but the pack was only £16.00 so one was for free . She then remembered the occasion I'd bought my snakeskin heels , for some reason I had put my selection of pictures in my pocket so I showed her the one of me in my bodycon dress wearing the heels, she was astounded , she pulled out the other picture of the one I use for my avatar and couldn't believe it . I then showed her my favourite which is the black cocktail dress I wore for the Xmas party.

I headed home feeling really uplifted , I could smell the selection of perfumes , I had two nice skirts one of which I'm still wearing while I type this with a blouse and wedges on .

For those who are truly still trying to hold on to their marriages I apologise but I can't wait for the time when I'm free to do all this without looking over my shoulder and waiting for the barrage of questions and scathing comments . Now I have to revert to drab before 4.00pm and make sure it's all out of sight again I'm also prepared for the question of what have I been doing all day !

kimdl93
09-17-2017, 10:25 AM
No scathing criticism from me. What's important is that you are at peace with the direction your life is taking. And I wish you and your soon to be x the very best.

sarah_hillcrest
09-17-2017, 10:27 AM
Yeah, I feel you. There have been times when I've wished that my wife and I could just part ways and live our own lives. She went to visit a friend for a week once and I realized at the end of the week that she wasn't holding me back as much as I thought. Things kept getting in the way, and then I made some excuses eventually to avoiding glamming up because I realized I was just worn out. Don't get me wrong I wish I had more time to dress, and I'm lucky because she has slowly come to accept me, just needs boundaries

Lana Mae
09-17-2017, 11:34 AM
Sounds like you had a good time! My best to you and her in your lives separate! Hugs Lana Mae

docrobbysherry
09-17-2017, 11:38 AM
Fortunately, the beginning of my dressing and our separation were almost simultaneous. I cannot imagine what it must like for a trans trying to explore her gender variance under the watchful eye of a spouse!:daydreaming:

Or even worse. While sneaking around behind her SO's back!:doh:

I was blessed with all the private time and space I needed to try every sexual and gender variant idea that entered my mind for over 15 years. Without a worry of being interrupted or "caught"! :o

Now, u have that same freedom, Teresa. I wish we all did!:thumbsup:

NancySue
09-17-2017, 12:04 PM
Totally agree. Life is a myriad of decisions...some good, some bad. You appear to have your head on straight and know what to do...near, short and long term. Time will tell and heal. Best to you as you move ahead.

Jean 103
09-17-2017, 12:22 PM
I know how you feel. When I separated from my wife, is when my live changed. My advice is just take it easy and wait. It will happen, the clothes are one thing, life is another. This will soon be a distant memory. I would be willing to bet that in a couple of years you see things differently. The difference between hiding and being out, accepted, making friends, just living in the open is huge.

Teresa
09-17-2017, 12:35 PM
Jean,
Thanks for that, the problem is those friends are on hold !

I realise it's not all about clothes and I'm try to build a wardrobe that I can be comfortable with so it blends with my lifestyle. You'll notice I didn't use the word pass, the only thing TGs pass as is as TGs we are as we are .

~Joanne~
09-17-2017, 12:50 PM
I'm also prepared for the question of what have I been doing all day !

It's funny, of everything you typed, this is the sentence I have the most problem with. If your getting a divorce, it's none of her business what you did all day. Just saying.

Teresa
09-17-2017, 12:59 PM
Joanne,
She will continue to ask the question until the day the removal men take our furniture to the two new homes .

We are only separating , no talk of divorce but even so it will be none of her business when we are living in different homes !

Sarah Doepner
09-17-2017, 01:23 PM
I agree with you Teresa, once you are in your own places your lives will only involve the other on a limited number of things. Shared finance or family news are the ones that come to mind initially. I'm looking for that kind of independence from my adult children, but without the "shared finance" part, I've been doing that for their whole lifetimes and I need my time to make the kinds of decisions that effect me and just me. We put off so much for others over the years and it can feel or be judged as selfish, but I suggest we have earned that opportunity. So I wish you the speedy arrival of the moving vans!

CONSUELO
09-17-2017, 01:53 PM
Teresa,

I hope that the snails speed up for you. It must be very frustrating.
I am typing this while dressed and thank goodness I don't have to revert to drab as I dress openly at home. Given all that you have gone through Teresa it must be so frustrating that you cannot even dress as you want in your own home.

Best wishes for a speedy conclusion to this phase in your life.

Jean 103
09-17-2017, 01:57 PM
Teresa, I have read a few of your posts and it sounds like you have your head in the right place to do this. I use transgender person because I feel this best describes me and how I live. I love fashion and looking for the best deal. I'm very social and always looking for something new to wear.

Rachael Leigh
09-17-2017, 04:10 PM
Teresa I without question understand your situation as you know I too am going through much as well.
Someday it will all work itself out and I sure know the feeling of that retail therapy always a good thing
Hang in there sister
Rachael Leigh

BLUE ORCHID
09-17-2017, 05:59 PM
Hi Teresa:hugs:, It sounds like the trains are going to be running on separate tracks and not crashing into each other anymore.>Orchid...:daydreaming:...



Lets hope that the light at the end of the Tunnel isn't just another train coming the other way!

Teresa
09-17-2017, 06:39 PM
Many thanks for all your lovely comments to support my decision in taking this step.

Blue I'm hoping the light at the end of the tunnel is the fruition of my plans.

Some may be aware of me talking about starting my own painting or art group in my new home. I've taken some steps towards that by contacting the SAA. ( The Society of All Artists .) It is based in the UK not too far from where I intend to set up my new home . It does supply art materials Worldwide along with a useful magazine to members and very good tutorials and demonstration days. I asked directly if they had any TG members who I could possibly contact and more importantly if they are also running their own group. So far they have been very supportive and given me details of an exhibition sponsored by a national supermarket chain, to help disabled groups and members of the LGBTG community .

Maybe it's not for some to come out to this extent but to me it would be a dream come true, to present myself as I truly feel and to share an enjoyable hobby with other people.

To be forced to remain partly in the closet under a DADT regime would be almost criminal ! Yes Blue that is the light at the end of my tunnel, I might be in my mid sixties but I'm fit and well and can't wait for this new life to start .

Majella St Gerard
09-17-2017, 07:04 PM
Separations are tough, I'm working on my 2nd divorce, the best of luck to you. Enjoy your freedom.

Tracii G
09-17-2017, 07:38 PM
Freedom is everything.

Stacy Darling
09-18-2017, 07:49 AM
Teresa needed to do what Teresa needed to do!!

I'm happy that you are now happy! that's all that matters to me!

Stacy!

Karen RHT
09-18-2017, 10:43 AM
Happy to hear your proactive efforts to deal with your wife and be content with your life and lifestyle are improving and moving forward for you Teresa.


Karen