It struck me when reading a thread

[Marie-Jo]

I was reading Eryn's thread on coming out to people (https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?234480-Coming-Out-to-Long-Term-Friends) which, by the way, is wunderful to read from start to end. At one point she mentioned that the woman in a couple started to help Eryn (then dressed as him) with the hair and later gave her shoes. This act was then recognized as acknowledgement of approval to the disclosure of Eryn as transgender.
A while after it struck me. This sort of happened to me just recently. My daughter, who is as tall as me - about same size, have sort of hinted that she have the impression that I'm transgender. It has never been out in the open though. She have never seen me fully dressed, but probably seen pictures in a notepad that I forgot to take with me at a visit once.
What happened last Sunday when my wife and I was eating dinner with them at their home and she showed two dresses she was about to buy for a formal dinner event, was that she also showed a blouse and a top and asked if that was something we wanted to take as she wouldn't use it. She actually looked at me. My wife do not want my crossdressing to be openly disclosed and said nothing. I thought that I would like to try it on but then ... So my daughter dropped it and said it would go to charity then.
A couple of days later I was picking up their child from school and saw the top and the blouse lying where they were left last time. I picked them up and tried them on. Both fitted fine so I put them in my bag and texted my daughter that I took them. I got an Ok back. Didn't think more about it until I read Eryn's thread. What we actually did was me accepting that she accepted that I was cross-dressing. I do not know if she has informed her husband, so far. Probably not, so it is just between the two of us so far.
Today I made a lunch for my daughter, husband and child as he had his birthday earlier this week. In the morning I had put on a skirt. Still in skirt when starting to cook the meal, my wife commented "You do not intend to be in the skirt when they come?" No, I changed before. I was thinking about if I should use this time to tell about my cross-dressing but decided against it. I think I must prepare my wife for that in advance.

[Jaylyn]

I think that I would wait until your wife is also ready for you to come out. Remember they are a part of many of our CD lives as most married us not knowing we are doing this. I promised mine I would not come out unless she thought the time was right. We are in this marriage together this she is part of it. My wife has been for it 100% in the beginning to maybe sometimes when she was away to DADT. She definitely does not want me to come out. She might let me if we ever got a thousand miles away from the house..... Lol

[Micki_Finn]

I think if you want to come out to your daughter, that’s great. But don’t try to read people’s actions too much. Perfectly innocent remarks/actions can easily be interpreted as “that person KNOWS!”.

[Alice B]

I have come out out to my entire extended family and their friends, two of which have fully transitiioned. In a role reversal I have given a daughter in law several dresses and high heels because I can no longer wear them and we are the same size. I am sure your daughter knows and clearly accepts. What comes next is something that time will tell, but don't push it.

[GretchenM]

My recommendation would be to honor your wife's wish as closely as you can. That said, you need to make sure your wife is not insisting on that as a means to control your behavior for her benefit. If you haven't discussed the conditions of coming out to certain people, it is important to do so. That way you both have an understanding of each other's motivations and the feelings you share and do not share. Coming out does not need to be to everybody, but unless there is some really good reason I think it is just as important to come out to your kids as it was to come out to your wife. I came out to my daughter before I told my wife, but the reason for that was that my daughter is a mental health therapist with a university and has dealt with transgender students before. Otherwise, I would have told my wife first. It is a matter of honesty. I think you can assume your daughter knows; exactly what she knows or thinks she knows is another question. If your relationship with your daughter is a solid one, which seems to be the case, you and your wife should trust your daughter to be discreet about her knowledge. But withholding that information from dear loved ones is really not fair to them. Not very loving. Much of love is based on trust. Just my two cents worth.

[Teresa]

Marie,
It's so good to enter into this kind of relationship , it's never going to happen with my wife but my daughter has seen my clothes and shoes , she has seen my pictures and had no problems with her husband seeing them . She has given me makeup items, I recently bought a couple of skirts which I'm sure will fit her so I'm going to ask if she would like to borrow them .
When my separation happens and I'm living in my new home I will be dressed so I asked her if she would have a problem with dropping in , she said she would be more than happy to because she fully understands and accepts it's what I need to do . My only proviso is it depends how my 5 year old granddaughter deals with it as she's mildly autistic and I don't want to raise issues with her that she can't deal with, having grandpa suddenly becoming grandma. My daughter doesn't think it will be a problem it may not go down so well with my wife when she finds out .