If you became single again, What ?

[Rayleen]

As I was walking as I usually do, it came to mind if I was single again and it could well be, what direction would I take.

I could be free to enjoy my pastime CD
I could consider therapy for sex orientation
I could consider crossing over and move to another town.

Have you ever think about this and what are your opinions ?

something to meditate on for sure !!!

[NicoleScott]

I did become single again, and at the same time moved to a new town for a new job, where I knew nobody. Outside of normal office hours M-F, I was free to dress as much as I wanted. I learned that 3-4 timed a week was all i needed, and often more than I needed. I like close shaves before I make up, and 2-3 day beard growth gives me the closest shaves. Very close shaves every day is hard on my face skin. I can't just dress. I need the works.
I also learned I am a crossdresser, a guy who likes to dress up. Nothing else. It's about me, my clothes, shoes, makeup, wigs, nails, jewelry, accessories, etc. And very importantly, my mirrors (plural!), and my camera and computer.

[Jaylyn]

I really think I've found the one soul mate for life. I'm not ever planning on being single again. Ours is now 47 years n counting. I suppose though every one has to put their priorities in order. Good luck in your decisions Rayleen. Hope you find what you want in life.

[NicoleScott]

Jaylyn, you are so fortunate to have found "the one".
There are many members who are single again, for different reasons. And there are members who, again for different reasons, are facing the possibility that they may soon be single again.
My advice is to avoid making important decisions, like moving or transition, during stressful times (death, divorce...). But contemplating such an event isn't wishing it.

[Rayleen]

I did become single again, and at the same time moved to a new town for a new job, where I knew nobody. Outside of normal office hours M-F, I was free to dress as much as I wanted. I learned that 3-4 timed a week was all i needed, and often more than I needed. I like close shaves before I make up, and 2-3 day beard growth gives me the closest shaves. Very close shaves every day is hard on my face skin. I can't just dress. I need the works.
I also learned I am a crossdresser, a guy who likes to dress up. Nothing else. It's about me, my clothes, shoes, makeup, wigs, nails, jewelry, accessories, etc. And very importantly, my mirrors (plural!), and my camera and computer.

Nicole , I also like the way you went, the difference is I'm retired and can go and come as I want and move if not suitable.

[Rachael Leigh]

Well I don't have to wait I'm going to be single again next year.
It's been the catalyst got me going towards transition. I'm full time at work now and I'm so enjoying being me
Rachael

[carhill2mn]

I did become single again several years ago. I now spend about 90% of my time presenting as a woman. There is no one telling me what I should be doing or not doing except me.

[ShelbyDawn]

I became single again five years ago. As they say, the pendulum swings both ways. I went crazy with the pink fog. Makeup, wig, clothes, shoes,Dressing as much as possible, going out in public dressed. I have since mellowed, gaining a more accurate perspective on what works for me and what I need to be happy. I now underdress every day, sleep in a nightgown, and lounge around my apartment dressed but have given up on ever passing and as such, have lost the wig and makeup. If things change again, I’m sure I’ll adapt again.

[Elizabeth G]

I suppose a lot of self discovery would occur for me. It's easy in a hypothetical like this for my mind to ruin wild so rihht now my my thoughts are that I would come out to a bunch of people and outside of work I would be free to dress all the time, and who knows maybe go further. However reality might be very different. I would have to just see where things led me. One thing is for certain though I would finally get rid of all this unwanted body hair :lol:

[nikkim83]

I love my wife with all my heart, but if I were to become single again I would not remain my birth assigned gender. I stay what I am for my wife and kids.

I would then remain single until the day I went home.

[Joan58]

If I were to become single it would mean my wife preceded me in death, a sober thought for sure. Most likely
I would not change much about how I live,as I can freely dress now,maybe just get out amongst others more often.

[Tracii G]

When my ex walked out my whole world opened up.
Dressing was not a thing I was doing while I was married I just felt free of having to live in constraints and having to put up with her.
All things got better and dressing was something I could partake in more.
So my coming out was not a big deal and she knows all about me now and is glad I am happy.

[sara66]

If something were to happen. I would move to another state ( nothing to do with dressing). I would probably spend more time out dressed. Definitely have a lager wardrobe. I don't think I would marry again. I liked be single, I didn't get married until I was 40 and only had dated 2 woman in my life.
Sara

[Dana44]

After 62 years of going thru girls. I have finally found my soul mate and she is accepting. It took an awful long time. I did try men. But they only want sex no love from them. So I gave this girl a chance and it is great to have her.

[alesha]

But contemplating such an event isn't wishing it.
Very well put.

I would be devastated if I were to be single again. I would eventually move on and may be find a way to transition but there are other considerations to take into account, mainly kids and work.

[Teresa]

Rayleen,
I will be separated in the next few weeks , I'm planning to move about 20 miles from my current home and family , so it's far enough away to do my own thing but near enough to keep in touch with my family obligations .

While I wouldn't call it a pastime I will be free to dress as I choose , I hope it will be 100% , that all depends on the family ties !

My intention is to set up an art group and run it from my home as Teresa, I have already made inquiries and have the support of the SAA( Society of All Artists) they will give me guidance on forming and running a group and supply me with materials. They have also welcomed me to attend their workshops and open days with my group obviously accepting me as Teresa . I have Emailed some pictures so they know what to expect .

Where my gender issues go from there who can say ? I'll be more than happy walking my dog , doing my shopping and all the other every day jobs .

[LeannS]

I would give myself some time to refocus and then start the road to transition.
and moving would be part of the program

but I am not going to rock the boat to get to that point either.
If only wishes could be fishes
I could see the game warden now writing out a ticket for over the limit on wishes.

[Stephanie Nicole]

I became single again late last year, as others have said, I too did not dress while I was married except for the extremely rare occasion when my wife was out of town. Afterwards I bought quite a few things and spent as much time dressed as possible, even going out a few times ( mostly on drives but a few times shopping also). I am nowhere near passable and as such do not wear makeup except for lipstick occasionally and only wear clip on earrings and a necklace for jewelry. As I have said in other posts I met a wonderful woman who not only accepts my dressing but encourages it. I am so happy being with and around her that I asked her to marry me.

[Pat]

I could consider therapy for sex orientation

I don't understand that one. Are you saying you're having trouble accepting your sexual orientation? Or did you mean to type gender identity? (It doesn't seem to match the other things in the list.) My understanding of sexual orientation is there's nothing (healthy) you can do about it -- it is what it is. Of course, the same is true of gender identity -- all you can really do is accept it or suppress it.

I read an interesting article that said people "come out" about their gender identities when they experience some kind of existential crisis -- age, near-death experience, loss of love, etc. I know it's true for me. I've read lots of people's stories and it seems to be largely true for them too. So if you became single again and gender was important to you, you might well do any of those things.

My choice was to go down a long, winding path to a non-binary transition. Yours will be, well, yours. ;)

[Heidi Stevens]

First, you don’t have to be single to see a gender therapist, Rayleen. If you have any doubts about yourself, go find out.

I was asked by the professionals I have seen, for my dysphioria and subsequent care, a form of your question. They wanted to know my goals and how it involved my marriage. I honestly answered that what ever her requirements were to stay together, I would meet them. She is my only reason to be presenting myself as a male. As stated by others, she would have to precede me in death for me to peruse any other course. Love is a strange thing. Even though she objects to me dressing, she has given me some ground rules that we both can abide by. I do not find them hard to accept all. Like I said, Love is a strange thing.

They also wanted to know my course if she were to pass. There I honestly explained I would leave the area for a while and proceed with living as my true self full time. After a period of time I would possibly return to the area a new person to all our friends, even though I’m still the person I’ve always been.

[katiej1989]

I've thought about that (often) and know that if I were to become single again, I would most likely dress regularly and begin to transition to dressing full time in my life.

But, my wife and I are very committed to each other and odds of us splitting are fairly low, so I don't dwell on it too much.

[Rayleen]

To explane some points in my statement, for health reason of my partner, could become single again. Then not in a rush of mixed emotion will think it thru for a while. What I was talking about is going for consultation to help me for myself , but one thing is sure...I will not stop my CD . Time enough to focus on my future and where I want for me. It will be time for me for sure.

- - - Updated - - -

Sometimes I have difficulty accepting my gender identity, being born in the wrong gender.

[Ressie]

I've been single with my own home since 2005. My crossdressing has increased and closets are overflowing with female clothes. For the first couple of years I found that the women I met and found attractive were all married. I started having sex with men for the last 3 years instead.

Now it's getting harder to see myself getting into another romantic relationship with a female. Between finding one that's pro CDing and that I also would love for all the other reasons, it seems far fetched. Heck, maybe I need a therapist!

[Lana Mae]

I am single. My wife passed away two years ago! Shortly after that I started dressing! Now my nail are polished and my ears are pierced. I wear panties, women's jeans and shoes/sneakers and a male/unisex top! That is my attire except at work! If I go out en femme, it is with bra, forms and wig and make up! I just started dressing at 65! I am just going with the flow on my journey! Hugs Lana Mae

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Rayleen:hugs:, At my age I probably change a thing.>Orchid...:daydreaming:...

[Jean 103]

I did become single a little more then two years ago. I live as Jean a transgender person. I represent as male at work and female the rest of the time. When I thought about living this way, I thought I would have to move out of the area. I did the exact opposite, I did it in the town I grew up in. Growing up here was how I became part of the in crowd. It's pretty crazy if you think about it. I've come so far in a short period of time.

[SaraLin]

I honestly don't know. And to tell the truth - I'm in no hurry to find out.

OK, not that I've gotten that out of the way, H-m-m-m

I don't think I'd seek another partner.
I do think I"d be more "girly" on a regular basis, but decided years ago that transition is not for me.
Maybe I'd get more active in the LGBT(etc) community.

'bout it.

[CarlaWestin]

I do experience being single every now and then. It's interesting to be able to live as a woman for awhile but there's that underlying feeling of loneliness that is haunting. I do enjoy the experience but, I'm so happy when she's back home. If I were to become single, I would certainly downsize and think about retiring earlier. I just wonder if after doing all of the CD bucket list stuff, what would be the next adventure?

[Meghan4now]

Careful what you wish for. You might just get it.

[Fiona123]

Divorce would be painful to be sure. It would make transitioning more possible though.

[Jayne44C]

I haven't thought about being single. I enjoy my life as it is, with one exception. The caveat is I don't dress and if I were single, I'd be free to do it as I chose to.

[Jackie7]

I became single again, via a long separation and then divorce, after 30+ years of marriage. I moved closer to NYC, decided to present en femme socially as much as possible, and found that I could handle it 3 or 4 days each week. I met my second wife while dressed, we became girlfriends before lovers, she is totally accepting and approving partly because there never were any dark secrets to reveal, and today I have never been happier.

BTW in the divorce I decided it was in my best long-term interest, and for the best in family politics, to just roll over financially. The nut included an executive-level 401K, a big house on a lake in Connecticut, and a business property, all sold in 2005-06, at the peak before the crash. So it was very expensive for me, but I got the best value for money I’ve ever spent. As an old friend told me, a retired divorce lawyer who is also trans, “guys like you get back on their feet in a couple of years, don’t worry about the money and go for what you really want.” Best advice I ever took.

[jennifer0918]

For me it's been 20 years and it's been hard. I'm ready to go!!!!!!!
Yes more to time to CD,and yes maybe will consider to transition.

[Sara780]

I am in the process of separating from my wife after almost ten years of marriage. My CD'ing didn't come out until the end, it wasn't the cause of our separation, but an underlying cause of depression and anxiety which was more of the cause. I found a good therapist who is helping me come to terms with myself. So I have a new start on the horizon and we will see what it brings.

[Gypsy Sam]

Intrigued by Ressie's response to this topic, and making a choice to date men after giving up on finding a woman. Couldn't imagine life without my wife, yet my imagination spins widely about assuming a female role with a gender male. Curiosity can be a dangerous thing, yet wonder if others made that choice as well?

[Sarah Doepner]

I was married for 40+ years when my wife passed away. Within a few weeks in this empty house I started dressing much more often. Several months later an adult son needed a place to live with his young daughters and I fell back in the closet. That's been about a year now and although I'm single, I'm not living that way. I'm getting older by the day and wanting to see what the world holds for me as a single person once again. I have no idea what I'll do but I'll be starting at square one and probably go through the "kid in a candy store" phase again. Stay tuned.

[Beverley Sims]

I have these musings from time to time although I plan things around the fact that I am happily married.

Maybe a similar freedom and enjoyment as when I was twenty but I think a little more of a lonely existence now.

[Alice B]

The only way I could become single again would be the death of my wife and she should live longer than me. At 75 nothing would change other than dressing more.

[Mickitv]

Wow what a great question. At this age it is difficult to say. I know I would keep dressing and probably dress more often. Beyond that probably remain as I am - " A cutie pie in a dress." lol

[Cherylgyno]

Good question, you already realize that. I am a cross dresser and have been since I was 6 year's old.
If my wife were to precede me in death I wouldn't look for another woman to take her place. I would be content being alone with myself.
If I were to meet a GG I would make sure that she knew Cheryl right off. She would have to love Cheryl first.

[Alice Torn]

I know i am one of the few singles on here. Never knew what it would be like to not be single. It is lonely a lot, with no one to share life with, and even dressing gets old at times.

[AngieStone]

I have to agree with Cheryl, my wife and I have been together for over 37 years and if something would to happen I have no intentions of getting married again. I was lucky to find my one true love at a young age and if I was by myself I would just use it to have more Angie time. More Angie time is not a bad thing.

[susan54]

I have been single for several years and I live in a large, secluded house. I only have to be in the office 2-3 days a week so spend almost all my time in skirts and dresses (or nightdress at night). My legs and armpits are shaved and I have Minx toes (pedicure with coloured stick on transfers). I occasionally go out as a woman and that is the only time I wear make up or a wig - I don't want to be a woman but I love the clothes and how I look in them. Am I happy on my own? Yes, very much so. Would I be even happier with the right woman? Yes. I like intelligent, open-minded women anyway but most of my partners have not been into clothes and were not comfortable with how stylish my wardrobe was, but at least one used to like me to sleep in a nightie. Being on my own brings other freedoms I enjoy like going to bed and getting up when I feel like it and reading or playing music in the middle of the night (remember my house is secluded so no neighbours to disturb). Recently met a wonderful woman who is in a relationship (not actually married) but has let me know she is not happy - I met her when I was wearing a dress so if something develops it will obviously not be an issue.

[Angie G]

Next year my wife and I get to the 50 year mark. So I don't think being single again is on the board. Nor do I wish it. Well just say it happened if I was 35 years younger I may have thought about going over to the other side.:hugs:
Angie

[Crissy Kay]

If I were single again, I am sure I would do more dressing then I do now. Not too sure about much else.

[Stephanie47]

If I were to become single again it would be only due to the passing of my wife. At my age (70) I believe I would remain single and have absolutely zero entanglements. That would let me Stephanie whenever I felt the need or desire.

[sometimes_miss]

I became 'single' again about 20 years ago. I'm one of those who had stopped crossdressing for over ten years, and thought that I had 'beaten it'. I really believed that I'd never do it again. A few years after I got married, the crap hit the fan, and the urge returned with a vengeance. Several years later, we got divorced. At that time, all I knew was how I wound up being a crossdresser. My ex thought otherwise. So, I decided to figure out exactly where I stood, as far as finding another mate. And the prospects weren't good. Each book I read, showed pretty much the same thing: That the figures were stacked against me. Only 6 percent of women thought it ok for a man to crossdress. Three percent would accept it in someone they knew. And one and a half percent thought that they could accept it in a mate. I found it interesting that each time, the numbers were about halved. When I went to therapy with my wife, the therapist told us that of the women that thought they could deal with it, about half again, eventually wound up splitting up with their crossdressing SO.
(I've rounded off the stats to the nearest whole number, but each time, it was very, very close).
So. The end result was that less than 1% of women are able to deal with having a crossdressing mate. And that's not acceptance, that's tolerance. As we see on these boards alone, the number of women who accept it is still few.

What I decided to do. And how I have to live.

I felt that this was no fault of my own. No one chooses to become a crossdresser; it's a desire that occurs within us, and we are left with the decision as to whether to do it, or be faced with the constant frustration from not doing it. And it is this, which poses the dilemma. If we are up front about being a crossdresser with every woman we meet, odds are that we will have to date over a hundred women before we come across even one that might accept us. Then add in all the other compatibility potential issues, and the odds are slim indeed that any of us will find a mate. After all, how many people can we date? I don't know about any of you, but in my lifetime, I certainly don't have a 100% batting average.
So I studied further. And learned how to spot women that are interested in me already. Yes, there are all those pick up artist books, but they rely on sheer numbers to even get phone numbers. There had to be a better way. So I learned it. And lo and behold, it works. But it still relies upon me approaching a woman, asking her out, and then carefully asking questions in order to see how she feels about men who, well, for the simplist way to put it, are gender benders. The first barrier is to see how they feel about homosexuality. Then transsexuals. I ask if they know anyone in either group, and see if she gets along with them, supports them. Not overtly, but when I find something in the news, I mention it and see what kind of response I get. Assuming positive, during our dates, I will bring up a movie or a show involving some type of crossdressing male. Wong fu seems to be an acceptable show; and Patrick Swayze is pretty much hot to almost every woman. The question I will pose sometime during the movie, will be how she feels about him. Now, I usually establish her attraction to him with another movie first; Ghost, Roadhouse, Dirty Dancing, take your pic. Then it becomes the issue of whether if he's seen in woman's attire is a deal breaker. If not, the I suppose full steam ahead, and eventually discuss crossdressing, gender bending, etc., and see where it goes. I have yet to find a woman who would accept a crossdresser for a mate. I have found several that would be OK with a son who was a crossdresser, but none that would be attracted to a guy who does it.

After I got divorced, I placed an ad on America Online's personals section. Seems I was pretty interesting to women, I got lots of hits. curiosity got the best of me, and I place a second ad (under another screen name), adding that I crossdressed; not all the time, but that it was something that I occasionally needed to do. Other than prostitutes, dominatrix's, and other ladies for hire, I got zero responses. Over the years, I also place ads on Plenty of fish, again, almost zero responses. The women who responded to me, were so desperate for a date that they would say yes to anything, but eventually admitted that they really didn't find it attractive, and wanted to know if I would stop.

So, basically zero. Out of what, 26 million people on AOL, and who knows how many on POF?

The odds are terrible. So it leaves us with little choice. If we want to date, we're going to have to be happy with short term relationships, essentially until we find out if the lady can put up with a crossdresser as a mate. And then, when we find out the worst, figure out a way to let her down without outing ourselves (unless of course you're just fine with being out).

It's a hard life to live that way, but at least we can date. As the old saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all.

and that's where I currently stand. It seems that crossdressing is a deal breaker for almost all woman.

[Ally 2112]

Been single for about 5 years I think i have got to the point where i just want to stay single .I just do not want to go through a third time telling some one only to have it fail in the end

[Rayleen]

I became 'single' again about 20 years ago. I'm one of those who had stopped crossdressing for over ten years, and thought that I had 'beaten it'. I really believed that I'd never do it again. A few years after I got married, the crap hit the fan, and the urge returned with a vengeance. Several years later, we got divorced. At that time, all I knew was how I wound up being a crossdresser. My ex thought otherwise. So, I decided to figure out exactly where I stood, as far as finding another mate. And the prospects weren't good. Each book I read, showed pretty much the same thing: That the figures were stacked against me. Only 6 percent of women thought it ok for a man to crossdress. Three percent would accept it in someone they knew. And one and a half percent thought that they could accept it in a mate. I found it interesting that each time, the numbers were about halved. When I went to therapy with my wife, the therapist told us that of the women that thought they could deal with it, about half again, eventually wound up splitting up with their crossdressing SO.
(I've rounded off the stats to the nearest whole number, but each time, it was very, very close).
So. The end result was that less than 1% of women are able to deal with having a crossdressing mate. And that's not acceptance, that's tolerance. As we see on these boards alone, the number of women who accept it is still few.

What I decided to do. And how I have to live.

I felt that this was no fault of my own. No one chooses to become a crossdresser; it's a desire that occurs within us, and we are left with the decision as to whether to do it, or be faced with the constant frustration from not doing it. And it is this, which poses the dilemma. If we are up front about being a crossdresser with every woman we meet, odds are that we will have to date over a hundred women before we come across even one that might accept us. Then add in all the other compatibility potential issues, and the odds are slim indeed that any of us will find a mate. After all, how many people can we date? I don't know about any of you, but in my lifetime, I certainly don't have a 100% batting average.
So I studied further. And learned how to spot women that are interested in me already. Yes, there are all those pick up artist books, but they rely on sheer numbers to even get phone numbers. There had to be a better way. So I learned it. And lo and behold, it works. But it still relies upon me approaching a woman, asking her out, and then carefully asking questions in order to see how she feels about men who, well, for the simplist way to put it, are gender benders. The first barrier is to see how they feel about homosexuality. Then transsexuals. I ask if they know anyone in either group, and see if she gets along with them, supports them. Not overtly, but when I find something in the news, I mention it and see what kind of response I get. Assuming positive, during our dates, I will bring up a movie or a show involving some type of crossdressing male. Wong fu seems to be an acceptable show; and Patrick Swayze is pretty much hot to almost every woman. The question I will pose sometime during the movie, will be how she feels about him. Now, I usually establish her attraction to him with another movie first; Ghost, Roadhouse, Dirty Dancing, take your pic. Then it becomes the issue of whether if he's seen in woman's attire is a deal breaker. If not, the I suppose full steam ahead, and eventually discuss crossdressing, gender bending, etc., and see where it goes. I have yet to find a woman who would accept a crossdresser for a mate. I have found several that would be OK with a son who was a crossdresser, but none that would be attracted to a guy who does it.

After I got divorced, I placed an ad on America Online's personals section. Seems I was pretty interesting to women, I got lots of hits. curiosity got the best of me, and I place a second ad (under another screen name), adding that I crossdressed; not all the time, but that it was something that I occasionally needed to do. Other than prostitutes, dominatrix's, and other ladies for hire, I got zero responses. Over the years, I also place ads on Plenty of fish, again, almost zero responses. The women who responded to me, were so desperate for a date that they would say yes to anything, but eventually admitted that they really didn't find it attractive, and wanted to know if I would stop.

So, basically zero. Out of what, 26 million people on AOL, and who knows how many on POF?

The odds are terrible. So it leaves us with little choice. If we want to date, we're going to have to be happy with short term relationships, essentially until we find out if the lady can put up with a crossdresser as a mate. And then, when we find out the worst, figure out a way to let her down without outing ourselves (unless of course you're just fine with being out).

It's a hard life to live that way, but at least we can date. As the old saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all.

and that's where I currently stand. It seems that crossdressing is a deal breaker for almost all woman.

Thank you for your very informative and interesting answer sometimes miss.

[sherri]

I think a lot of gurls who have to deal with restrictive circumstances daydream about living free and unecumbered, but the reality is if you do find yourself single and rid of constraints, and you do decide to ramp up the femme stuff, it is easy to succumb to isolation and loneliness due to social stigma, lack of interested partners, etc. In other words, it is nearly impossible to escape barriers altogether. That might not be a problem if you're content with solitude, but most of us need more than that and eventually something has to give. Just saying, the dream of a 24/7 femme life isn't all that realistic given the realities of life and some sort of balance has to be found. I'm single and live alone and I dress to some degree almost daily here at home, but for me there is an element of frustration involved because the desire to have personal relationships as a femme person is a constant itch that never gets scratched, so to speak. I tried for years to cultivate friendships at the clubs that would extend into everyday life but they just never materialized. Now I have to be self-aware about lapsing into a routine where I'd rather just keep to myself where I can be femme rather than get out and interact as a guy. "A guy" is not really who I am but a certain amount of guy time in necessary to avoid becoming a total recluse. I guess what I'm saying is there is no magic wand that makes crossdressing simple or easy. :heehee:

[barbara gordon]

I became single a few years ago after being married for a long while.

I started dressing more . and more freely .
eventually , I started dating again.

at first i kept my dressing a secret (AGAIN). I realized that I didn't want to go through having the burden of a deep dark secret . So I decided from a certain point that I would not hide my mixed gender and crossdressing from any new romantic partner. It worked . I met someone who I liked a whole lot and I told her on the first date about crossdressing ,and about my gender self identification . Best thing I ever did for myself. its been a few great years now with no hiding from my companion.

If I become single again , I will tell any new potential partner about crossdressing , so that from the beginning we will each know where we stand on this point.

[colourmannn]

If single again,
The restraints of a closet CD would be lifted, I would dress as the desire warranted without the fear of discovery in my home.
I would check off every item on my CD bucket list-fully dressed, head to toe, out and about,meeting with like minded ladies.
Would love to have a female friend(s) to share my CD experience with, to learn from the sex I admire so much (and maybe check off a few items on my fantasy/fetish bucket list).
I would remain single. The older I get, and after 30yrs of marriage, I'm tired of compromise to please others.

[Bobbi46]

Being single again (2nd time for me) can be many things, it can bring being both alone and loneliness, it bring happiness for most but for me yes I am happy dressing everyday doing just as I please. But i am I totally happy! and no i never will i have been rejected twice in my life now and am resolved to live my life alone. but there are of course the plus sides as i say do what i want go where I please, that is where a peacefulness of life can be found, no secrets, no hiding in closets, and being totally open with the few friends and neighbors I have here who all know ans have seen me dressed.
So yes being single is not to be looked upon as something to be frightened or to be afraid of sometimes it is a blessing in disguise which in all honesty is where i am now because dressing has brought to me a different level of happiness almost an ethereal one sometimes tangible sometimes not but at the end of the day a way of life, of peace and of tranquility.

[Kas]

I would move to a city where I don't know anybody, rent a small place for myself and try to transition to full-time. Doubt it will happen though...

[Steph_CD_62]

If I became single again I don't think I would change a whole lot. Yes I would probably be dressed every day after work until I got up the next day, and I would take more trips out of town while dressed and do more shopping.

[Robyn16]

It’s funny I have thought about this on numerous times recently.
So if I was single again the direction I would take would likely be that I would consider crossing over and move to another town.

[Lacey New]

I don't know that i would actively look for another partner. However, I would probably move to another place - probably in the country but not far from a decent sized city where I could shop and be anonymous. . I would experiment more with my dressing and perhaps even go out in public or meet up with a group. another town. If I would happen to find another partner, I would not keep my crossdressing from her. I would tell her and simply see where things go.

[Vintage4sarah]

Especially over the last few years, I have given this idea some thought, but it is only a fantasy. After 46 years married to my best friend, being single would mean that a tragedy had happened. If this did happen (hopefully not), I think that I would fully shave my body and do more to feminize my face and body so I could spend more time as Sarah. I would definitely resettle in a new area closer to tg friends and others.

[ellbee]

Not to jinx it, but this is a really cool thread! :thumbsup:


Eh, I'm pretty much habitually single. Always been that way. Part of it is I'm tough to please? :strugglin

Has its pros & cons, to be sure. Grass ain't always greener, blah blah blah.


I seem to have taken the opposite approach that many have, in that I got a lot of CD/gender stuff "out of the way" early on, especially in my 20s & 30s. You know, while many guys instead were meeting & finding their future brides, getting married, having kids, doing the whole grown-up thang, etc.

Did I miss out on stuff? Eh, I look back at the GG's throughout my life, whether how much or how little we got/could have gotten involved, and I realize it probably would have been a mistake with each & every one of them. No offense to any, of course. :D


These days, I probably would welcome finally settling down. As a wise woman once said, it's nice to have someone to go through life with. And I ain't getting any younger. :heehee:

I swear I've met "her" -- you know, "the one." Not to sound cliche, but I kinda instantly knew when I first met her, just something about her presence... At the time, I'm thinking to myself, "Umm, don't I know you?" Of course, in my typical fashion, things are moving at a glacial pace, as I always need a lot of time & space to grow accustomed to the idea & to prepare myself. But I could honestly say that I could see myself spending the rest of my life with her -- no small feat for a "confirmed bachelor" like myself. Eh, we'll see what happens. One day at a time, here. And no fear.


Anyway, while I'm going through this stuff now, at this stage in my life, others who I mentioned above, may now only be wondering or perhaps dipping into what I have already done. I suppose I went against the grain of what normally happens/is expected... Wasn't always easy, and some single people who have already posted have touched on some of the stuff that we go through.

But, I suppose I needed to live my life exactly the way I have, in order to reach this point now. It's helped me to become who I am today. Would I want to go through all this CD/gender stuff all over again? Heck, no. But would I have done things exactly the same way, if I could start over from the beginning? Heck, yeah!

So many feelings, discoveries, adventures & memories, of all kinds of various shapes & sizes. Though at the same time, the past is staying in the past. Been there, done that. I've had "my fill" -- or better yet, I've grown as a human? :)

[Lindabrown]

I would set up a room as a makeup and photo studio