Therapy

[leannejacobs]

I've suffered from stress for a number of years, recently I suffered a heart attack which was thought to be stress induced, I've been instructed to seek professional help for stress management, I have an opportunity to see a therapist through a scheme organised by my employers, I doubt it will be local but that doesn't matter, it's totally confidential obviously.
Now to be perfectly honest I have no idea what causes my stress, I can't say it's my work and I can't say it's my home life, all I do know is that dressing up as Leanne eases the stress immensely.

Now if and when I see a therapist (non gender therapy) should I even mention my dressing habits? If so how soon into the visits, I really cannot think of what I'd have to say.

I'd really like the therapist to be female too, no idea if I could specify this, I'm going to call tomorrow to see what I can arrange, I'll keep you posted.

[sarah_hillcrest]

I think if you feel like its relevant to your stress issues, then yes. I'm totally with you on the therapist gender, in general I'm just more comfortable around women in most situations.

[Maria 60]

Depending what root the therapist takes the dressing may have to be discussed. For myself if I ever need therapy I would have to first feel comfortable with the therapist.
We had some issues with my daughter a few years back and it was breaking up our family, we choose to use my wife's therapist from work but he seemed like he didn't care and it was just a job and nothing came out of that.
Our doctor recommended this therapist and she was the best, we felt very comfortable with her and with that we all opened up to her and with a few sessions and things were all repaired at home. I believe that the therapist is the differences, if you feel comfortable with him or her you will open up. Let us know how it goes.

[NicoleScott]

On both points I agree with Sarah. If you are more comfortable with a female counselor you will be more open, to your benefit, so go for a female.
And yes, mention your crossdressing and see where the discussion goes. Maybe it is relevant to your stress and you just need help seeing it. If you need reassurance that the sessions are confidential, as for it, but you shouldn't have to. I'm not sure what a "scheme organized by my employers" means, but I hope your session content isn't back-doored to your employers by some cozy arrangement. Let's hope not.

[Becky Blue]

Leanne, I think if you see someone and do not tell them everything, they can't help you properly.

[lingerieLiz]

One question I would ask is will any information within the sessions be released to the company other than billing and completion of the treatment.

[Jaymees22]

I would want to know if anything would get back to my employer, probably not it should always be confidential. First get to see if you connect and like the therapist and are confident in her before telling her what relieves your stress. I know I dress to relieve stress. The therapist I went to seemed to help a lot.

[Jennifer in CO]

Leanne, I was there 2 years ago when I had a "stressed induced cardiac event" as they called it. Up to that point they (Dr's) kept telling me when I'd check my BP which usually was 160-170 over 100 to "just sit down and relax for a few minutes". In my situation, it just built up more stress. As a funny, the only time my BP was "normal" was when I was on the race track (road/track racing in my race car). It will be interesting to see what they tell you as recommendations. Post my "event", they put me on a BP med and "stressed" reducing my stress level. Its been hard, but I have cut my workload in half and feel better for it. Stress now is limited to maybe once or twice a week issues, not 24/7.

[giuseppina]

I'm disinclined to use any therapist hired by a company benefits plan for privacy reasons. There is no proof the therapist will be at arms length from the company.

My preference is the therapist have no connection whatsoever to the company.

As for what happens during the session, the therapist will come up with some relevant questions. I can't help but think the CDing is a stressor for some people anxious to keep it a secret.

[leannejacobs]

Just to quash your reservations, the company they use is a well known country wide one, I have no doubt that it would be 100% confidential.
I don't believe my dressing causes me any stress, when I do feel stressed it does add to it slightly if I know I have no chance to dress to de-stress lol it's a vicious circle lol but no the dressing is a complete relief for me, in fact I'm sitting dressed right now an feel on top of the world.
I will indeed request a female councillor, as was mentioned in one of the replies, I too relate better to women and feel more are ease in their company.

[GretchenM]

Seems to me that if you have had a heart attack that has been linked to stress then anything that contributes to stress or stress relief, such as dressing, is fair game for discussion. I have a daughter who is a therapist and according to her anything the client holds back can act as a block to getting at the root of the matter and being able to help the client. In my opinion, if dressing is a stress reliever then revealing that only adds to the chances of the therapist finding the cause of your severe stress. Dressing may not be directly related, but it may provide important clues as to what the cause is. There must be a reason it relieves the stress and that reason may be a cause of stress.
As others have said, first you need to be comfortable with the therapist. If you aren't request another person. Once you develop a trusting connection then pour your heart out with as much detail as you can, even things that make you uncomfortable. Nothing should be off limits. Most therapists are not judgmental and need all the facts you can provide them. Good luck. Conquering stress can be a very enriching pursuit. You find out things about yourself you never knew were there. I know. Been there and done that. Life is so much better afterwards.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Leanne :hugs:, If you really want help be open and honest with your therapist >Orchid...:daydreaming:...

[Sarasometimes]

No idea where you live but in USA, anything you discuss is protected medical info. The key to having therapy work is an open relationship between client and therapist so you need to feel secure in their presence and able to discuss your inner feelings. Sometimes this will take a few tries with different therapists. You can find therapists on Psychology today website by specialty and area of practice. try to find one who mentions gender along with the more common areas like stress, depression...
I have been working for years with mine on a host of issues and i can talk to her about anything, even very intimate subjects. Good luck and trust your gut and I also only worked with females.

[Pat]

I'm disinclined to use any therapist hired by a company benefits plan for privacy reasons. There is no proof the therapist will be at arms length from the company.

It may be different in Canada but in the US your medical privacy is protected. I've worked for/with a lot of companies. They all contract out their therapy to medical groups that specialize in that. The company providing therapy reports that you are receiving treatment so your company can decide how many employees are using the service and if it's financially sound for them to provide the service, but they receive no details on what you're being treated for.

In any therapy, it's up to you how effective it will be. The more information you bring, the more the therapist will be able to help guide you. If transgenderism/crossdressing is an issue for you, I'd suggest pre-interviewing the therapist (you get to choose) to see if they have experience in that area. (You don't hire a driveway guy to fix your roof.) Gender therapy is kind of specialized but all therapists I know treat a wide range of issues, especially those dealing with stress and anxiety in its many forms. So I'd say a gender therapist can help with your stress, but a therapist who has no experience probably can't help with your crossdressing.

[leannejacobs]

I live in the UK where confidentiality is protected, I called the number today and am now waiting for a call back, they are trying to source a therapist in my area, I doubt they'll have one as I live in a fairly remote place but I'm not adverse to travelling to see someone, actually I'd prefer to do so, that way I won't be likely to bump into the therapist in my daily life.

I see some people have actually been asked to attend therapy dressed as their fem selves! I don't think that'd be something one would be advised to do here but I really don't know, IF I spill all and the option is there I think I would do it, another good reason not to attend somewhere local to me, at least then I'd have the option if it goes down that route, on saying that, there's no reason it should, I'm not seeing a gender therapist and I don't think my troubles relate too much to my dressing.

[JenniferR771]

Sara is right. Read through the websites and credentials of the possible therapist available. Look for gay-friendly comments and gender-friendly statements or experience, (avoid any negative vibes). You can find a therapist on Psychology today or referral sites, but remember the therapist probably pays them a commission or finder's fee.
You therapist may need to make a diagnosis before he can be paid to treat you. The diagnosis may be revealed to insurance and ultimately your employer. For instance mine was "gender dysphoria." And the girls in the outer office had that diagnosis written on my paperwork..."And so you are here for your gender dysphoria?" This said loud enough for others to hear.

[ShelbyDawn]

Short and simple. Tell your therapist everything; especially since you are not sure if the root of your stress. I did 5 years of therapy that started as marital issues. It literally saved my life and was a huge factor in my coming to terms with my dressing. I did ask my therapist if she was willing to discuss gender issues and she said it was my time we could talk about whatever I felt I needed to talk about. It all fits together.

[leannejacobs]

Stumbling block I'm afraid, the company aren't as country wide as they'd have you believe, their nearest therapist to me is 100 miles away! What now?

[Jennifer in CO]

what now?...sounds like you have some quality drive time while dressed! Seriously...if its that far away then if it is really important to you then make the drive. Heck...after half a dozen meetings they may tell your employer that you need to reduce your work stress and that will require you wearing a dress at work...ya never know!!

[AllieSF]

Leanne, That seems like a real hardship, which the insurance company should help you deal with. Ask them what is their process for filing a claim to get pre-approved for medical treatment, therapy, closer to your home. You will be surprised that when they put their foot down and then you put yours, you can sometimes win. It is well worth the try. Therapy treatment varies by insurance company, but accessibility to treatment should be considered as an out of policy approval in a case like yours. They do not need to know why, just that you need it. Did your GP recommend it? Tht can sometimes help convince them. Tell your doctor you need it for anxiety. He and them need no other details. Good luck.

[leannejacobs]

AllieSF, we don't do medical insurance as such here in the UK, we have the national health service, I could get a therapist through them but there's a long waiting list and I could be waiting up to 6 months to see someone, I do have private health care through my work so I'll see if they can arrange something a bit quicker, hopefully I'll get someone a bit closer to home.
I have found someone 50 miles away which would be ideal, not too close and not too far away, I'll just have to wait and see if I can get the private health care to pay for it, £50 an hour! I'm in the wrong business lol

[AllieSF]

Thanks Leanne. I didn't know where you lived. That type of problem sometimes happens here in the USA. Not often and it usually can be remedied.