I'm out!

[Kendalli]

Well to the wife anyways. So OMG. I'm at the parents house for most of the week hunting with my dad. I had brought a bunch of different options for underdressing and sleeping in being that the wife was staying home until the weekend. Suddenly she decides that she's coming a day earlier and she's asking about using the parents laundry machines for our dirties. so I quickly remove all the dirty panties and bras from my laundry pile and hide them. The wife does the laundry yesterday while I'm out in the woods. I come home go in the bedroom and there is a pair of panties sitting on the dresser! I had missed a pair. The wife wants to confront me in front of my parents but I all her to bring it up later. As soon as the parents head up to go to bed I spill the beans. Tell her how they are mine and that I've been dressing pretty much our whole marriage. (She new I had done some dressing in high school but thought I had given it up.) So anyways, she was supportive! Eek! She was mad that I have been hiding this from her but I told her my fears and she was very understanding. She said she is willing to let me take this as far as I want to take it, though she is unsure about her or any surgeries. I told her I'm not there yet and I don't know how far this will go now that it's out and I can dress more freely around her or even in public if I get the courage. She does want time to come to terms with everything of course so I need to pace myself, and I'm sure more questions are forth coming. She even said she'll help me with clothing and shopping and all that stuff. Such an amazing woman. I guess I found a good one. It's like a huge weight has been lifted off my chest. I've wanted to tell her for so long and been so scared to. Maybe in a few weeks or months I can get some forms and add a new better weight to my chest. 😜

Sorry for the long ramble. Just super excited and needed to share and let it out.

[dawn459]

Kendall: You have a keeper in your
Wife just don't get to fast because you have just come out to her in a way that she is going to have questions later be prepared to share your love of feminine clothes& how you started with her when you return home& be the man she married and both of you go shopping for clothes for her&
Kendall. Good luck on the journey

[LaurenS]

The wife wants to confront me in front of my parents but I all her to bring it up later.

This concerns me, but I hope everything turns out for you. Sounds like an understanding spouse. Good luck!

[Abbey11]

Congrats! Just remember to take it slow and patient

[KymG]

Its always encouraging to hear a positive experience.
Good for you, and thanks for posting.

[Kas]

Now we demand pics!

Joking...(not joking)

[Maria 60]

Dawn I love reading this threads, they make my day. I could just imagine and I know the feeling of lifting that weight off your shoulders and looking forward to sharing this with the love of your life.
It's the most amazing feeling when you can relax watching TV with your wife and dressed up and feeling comfortable being yourself and enjoying it with her.
It sounds like she's a pretty understanding women and hope you don't go full green light and take it slow with her, I will speak for myself looking back and thinking at times how selfish I really was.
Congrats again on the great news and keep us in the loop, sounds like better days are coming for Dawn but not always easy. Just like a marriage you have to always work at it.

[Pat]

Awesome! Congratulations. :) I understand how huge a step that is. I'm so happy your wife along for the ride. Good luck!

[JocelynJames]

Hi Kendalli and congrats on telling her. Pacing yourself is the best thing right now imho. I’m another Massachusetts girl too. There are lots of us here.

[Tracii G]

That is awesome !!!.
Give her time to adjust and understand this isn't a green light to do anything you want.
You both need to "grow" into this together.

[TrishaLake]

step one is the hardest, now make sure you take it slow and make her comfortable. It is hard to digest for most women, so taking it slow is best.

[bridget thronton]

You have a great wife - hope things go well as you move forward

[Tamsin Secret]

The relief is indescribable when you unburden that long held secret. I wish you the best on the new journey your now embarking on.

[mattfrykowski]

Sounds like she is definitely a loving and understanding woman. Many do not understand the desire or want to understand the desire/need that we all have. Keep that one around Kendalli!

[jazzysherry]

So lovely to hear this kind of thing happening. Kind of gives me hope. My partner knows but still says she doesn’t understand nor want to see Sherry.

[Fiona123]

Well done! I wish my wife was as accepting. The advice from Abbey about taking is slow is sound. Good luck!

[foxy bartender]

I also have a very supportive significant other, and the biggest thing you can do, is to communicate with her, and listen to her feelings. If she’s uncomfortable with anything talk it out, or let it go. She sounds like she wants to support you, so you need to be supportive of her feelings too. It’s a start of a very fun journey for y’all!

[Jenny22]

What a wonderful story ending! Send her some flowers! Go shopping with her, and let her select your fem clothing. She may open up a whole new world of fashion for you.

[Dr.Susan]

It's great you have her blessings now. I told my wife before we got married. We just had our 25th anniversary this October. As long as you put her and family first you should be cool. Oh, I live in western mass as well and welcome.

[GracieRose]

This really sounds great. However, as others have said, take it slow. As she processes this further, she may have ups and downs about her level of acceptance.
Keep communicating and do something extra nice for her.

[Leelou]

Congratulations, Kendalli! As others have mentioned, take things slow. What's really helped me with the women I've been out as a CD is to let them know that it's OK for her to set limits or boundaries. And you don't necessarily have to use the words limits or boundaries, because they may resist the idea saying "No, I don't want to limit you". But I need to know if there's anything they're uncomfortable with.

This will be a great time for you! And for your marriage. As others have mentioned, flowers are in order. Hold her tight. You've got a keeper.

[alwayshave]

Kendalli, I'm glad that it all turned out well for you. Take it slow and make sure your wife knows how important she is to you.....

[Linda P.]

"Such an amazing woman. I guess I found a good one."
Indeed! Find ways of continuing to show your gratitude to her.

[Lana Mae]

Go slow and keep communication open! Both of you share your feelings! Sounds like a great lady! Hugs Lana Mae

[Lydianne]

Hi Kendall,

I applaud your honesty, especially when it looked as though it was going well and then your wife said she was unsure about surgery. Surgery is a very high limit, and it would have been tempting to have banked that, but you were open about being unable to count it out, which, in many cases, we can't. I'm pleased that openness was rewarded. Huge credit to your wife.

Great job writing a post with all that adrenaline flowing :p. Enjoy your dressing! :thumbsup:.

- Lydianne.

[Dana44]

So very good that she is accepting. Take things slow and communicate well with here and all would be good, hopefully.

[Kayliedaskope]

another +1 on the taking it slow part. Congratulations on finding a keeper.

[BrendaPDX]

Congratulations! Not my first choice for how to come out, but you are OUT!!!! I am so happy for you, and you are very fortunate to have such an understanding and caring wife. Don't abuse her trust again; you don't know how lucky you are. Thank you for sharing. Brenda

[faltenrock]

Don't stress her and give her enough time to come to terms with your dressing. Communication is the real key.

[Barbara Joanne74]

Congratulations, as all the others here have said, take it slow, they may be many ups and downs in your relationship as you both come to terms.

Barbara

[Kendalli]

So a quick update. It's been close to two weeks since getting discovered by the wife. What an emotional roller coaster. Things started off great with the SO while she was trying to wrap her head around the whole thing. But as time has past, she has become less sure about it. She has been under a lot of pressure from her job recently which isn't helping. She is still trying to be supportive but she can't seem to wrap her head around as me more femme. I have only been underdressing and sleeping en femme. Trying to take it slow. We did set up a Stitch Fix subscription together, to start expanding my wardrobe and figure out my styles. The intimacy in our relationship is gone for now. She said it was weird kissing me now, even when I am in guy mode. She says that I feel like a stranger. I keep telling her that I'm still the same person she knows, just that I like to dress slightly different sometimes. So that is where we are now I guess. She's not leaving me by any means, but we are definitely working through a lot of stuff here. Sorry for the ramble again. And yes Kas, there will be pics eventually. Probably when the first Stitch Fix box comes in, since I don't have any real outfits to wear other than undies right now. ;P

[Rayleen]

Kendalli, the thing for me was good communication and explain your feeling to her and as others have said,
go slow and let her absorb what you tell her.
Hope the best for you two.

Rayleen

[Kas]

Hi Kendall,

That's a tough situation. It sucks about what she said about the kissing thing. That's pretty harsh IMO if its JUST for the fact that you wear women's clothing occasionally.

Are you sure you're not moving too fast? Even though it may not seem like much and she may have seemed supportive at the time, I think even trying to browse women's clothing together within the first couple weeks might be too fast. I think until she has her head wrapped around the idea completely and she has made up her mind if she is accepting or not, I think it would be best to leave the ball in her court for a while and wait to see what she wants to do. If she wants to talk about it she will. If she doesn't, might just mean your stuck in a DADT situation.

If I were you I would not dress (in front of her) until she has decided. If it already feels weird for her to kiss you in guy mode then I don't think you can push it much further honestly... Best of luck!

[Leelou]

Thanks for the update, Kendalli. I'm sorry that she's pulled back on the CD issue, but it's understandable. She learned after the marriage, so that's hard. I couldn't agree with Kas more, I think you're going too fast considering how she found out. It's only been a couple of weeks. My humble suggestion would be to stop wearing women's sleepwear for now, at least not every night. If she's having trouble even kissing you now, she needs some more time to process what she just learned.

Best of luck to you two.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Wow, encouraging outcome- congrats!

But proceed with caution. Be very sure that your wife is truly onside and not just saying what she thinks she ought to say. It's all very new for her- stay well within her comfort level. Hopefully she's solid, but it does sound very encouraging.

*****

Ok, just read your 2nd post. You need to back right off and remove as much stress from your wife's shoulders as you possibly can. She's trying, but she needs a lot of time. Think 6 months to start.

[Pat]

That's a tough situation. It sucks about what she said about the kissing thing. That's pretty harsh IMO if its JUST for the fact that you wear women's clothing occasionally.

It does suck, but I don't think the issue is clothing -- it seems much more likely that it's her being off-balance because she thought she knew Kendalli completely and now has discovered a hitherto unexpected thing about them. It's the old "if I didn't know this, what else don't I know?" I know it wasn't intended that way, but the effect is that the emotional rug has been pulled out from under her. This sort of thing needs time to heal. She has to re-orient herself to a world with this new fact in it. She may not have any experience of a situation like her own and not know how to proceed. It would be great if you could find a gender-friendly couple's cousellor or support group to help her find some examples of couples who have made it through this successfully.

[suzanne]

Im happy for you that it went so well with your wife. I hope it continues. But be careful about showing her everything all at once. Women sometimes fluctuate in how they feel about their husband's dressing and you might find out the hard way that she has hard limits on how feminine is too much. But so far so good!