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JocelynJames
12-13-2017, 03:10 PM
As some of you have seen, my desire to dress has dwindled and quite frankly it bums me out as I really do enjoy it. I check in here daily to see what’s new , but alas, the desire escapes me.
Out of the blue, Elizabeth G texts me yesterday to meet for lunch today as we have numerous times (en drab) . I’m not back in but a little face to face sister therapy helped and I wanted to give props to her. It improved my mood immensely.
I’m not sure if I need a slump buster or what. What have some of you done to get back in the groove?

Thanks,
~Joss

Jenny22
12-13-2017, 03:23 PM
Jocelyn, since you are now in winter, you might try fully underdressing ... the whole ball of wax .. and a little makeup, and go out among the normals.

Tracii G
12-13-2017, 03:27 PM
The desire waxes and wanes so don't worry too much.
Lots of people have complained about that so its rather normal.

JocelynJames
12-13-2017, 03:35 PM
Tracy, in the nearly 6 years since I told my SO, it’s been 1-3x dressing a week. The last 8 months has been maybe 4x. Just never been here and it sucks.i know it comes and goes but it seemed rather abrupt like crossdressing found out I still wear guy clothes.
Jenny, I never did the “less in a season”
. I shave year round and if anything dresses more in the winter. I don’t go out at all so maybe I need to next level it and go out for a ride.

Lana Mae
12-13-2017, 03:52 PM
Jocelyn, the desire does wax and wane! I went out for a ride my first time and I felt like I rocketed forward! But it was just a baby step! To me it was great! Best wishes for getting in to it again! Hugs Lana Mae

IleneD
12-13-2017, 04:21 PM
I understand, Jocelyn. Glad that a spark of joy inspired you again.
In the beginning of my re-discovered identity experience, I too would get depressed when I was prevented from dressing as I wish. I put my entire wardrobe away for over a month and I almost went into a crisis (but got over it too). I was and still am finding the right measure of my inner woman.

I'm starting to get on a "daily maintenance" routine where everyday I am Me in my appropriate gender. There will be times when I simply CAN'T dress for practical purposes, or wear more of my male clothes. But my attitude is beginning to embrace the concept of just being Me and knowing I am of "mixed gender" [my own term]. That way I avoid the ups & downs, dry spells and luxurious weeks of full Ilene. I know I can be "Ilene" any day and every day regardless of what's on my body, because I am Ilene.

Hell on Heels
12-13-2017, 06:00 PM
Hell-o JJ,
I know exactly what you're taking about!
Jenn@home has made a pop-up visit to my area
in the past, it couldn't have been more timely, or
effective at getting me back in the groove.

Other times, when I may not quite have been feeling "it",
I simply went and put on a dress and some makeup.
Worked like a charm!
Much Love,
Kristyn

Elizabeth G
12-13-2017, 07:56 PM
Hi Joss,

It was great meeting up with you at lunch today and I hope our lunch helped you in some way because it was certainly good for me. It's always nice to have some face to face sister time and I do enjoy our lunches:thumbsup:

I've been in slumps before and unfortunately I can't think of anything that I did consciously to break out of them. All I can say is that the urge may wax and wane but it ALWAYS comes back.

Elizabeth

Beverley Sims
12-13-2017, 11:14 PM
Just be a girl and go out and have a Starbucks with your girlfriend.

You can then sit there and eye off some of the male population.

Why?

To accept why you dress like you do.

Now go shopping for a nice dress and accessories. :-)

docrobbysherry
12-14-2017, 01:11 AM
Personally, I think you're lucky, Joss! I keep hoping a lull will come for Sherry. So I can clean up and organise my house, garages, the office, my life. But, then I see a pretty woman in a movie, a TV show, or at the mall. And, I just have to be her!:daydreaming:

Or worse! A story pops into my head and won't leave until I live it!:brolleyes:

Becky Blue
12-14-2017, 01:17 AM
Jocelyn, some of us are seemingly just wired that way, where our desires wax and wane. After 4 years of a constant very strong unrelenting desire to dress to go out, to be Becky, she left almost overnight... the next 3 years I did not have even the slightest urge. After thats she came back slowly and since then my desires wax and wane. Sometimes for a few weeks i have strong urges then they go for weeks, at other times my feelings change more than once during a day. Go figure..

Diane Smith
12-14-2017, 01:33 AM
I try to keep the urges on an even trajectory by always dressing for at least my hair and nail appointments, which combined, average about once a week. I may or may not dress up and go out in between, but push myself to do it on those days so I can stay in practice, try out some of my new stuff, and relieve some of the stress that builds up. So far, I've kept up this routine for almost 20 years, the only lulls being a couple of times I was seriously ill for a month or so each.

- Diane

Isabella Ross
12-14-2017, 03:06 AM
I see this part of my life as I do other parts. I golf when I get the urge. I cook when I get the urge. I play guitar when I get the urge. I dress when I get the urge. I try not to feel obligated or force myself to do any activity...if I do, the magic just isn't there. And when I'm not doing that activity, I'm not really thinking about it much (although I do examine most daily happenings and events through my TG lens). But...yes. Sister therapy is real!

mbmeen12
12-14-2017, 04:29 AM
Joss ditto for me but whats great you can start up any time. And when warmer weather comes back, so may the mood. To get back in the mood, Ill meet a friend to spark/rekindle desires over drinks and couple rounds of billiards, warm fire place.

deebra
12-14-2017, 04:40 AM
Everybody here is not normal except for me. The straights are not normal because they don't CD. The CD's that loose the desire to do such a wonderful feminine thing everyday is not normal. I am the only normal one because I love to dress in women's clothes to some degree every day. I might be even more normally female than a female, they have days too when they don't want to put on a bra.

IleneD
12-14-2017, 08:13 AM
Very nice way to keep things in perspective, Isabella.
Eat when you're hungry. Drink when you're dry.

JocelynJames
12-14-2017, 03:22 PM
Thanks everyone. I have been doing quite a lot of other things , but I am hoping to jumpstart this weekend with my favorite girly things and maybe a few new ones.