A dilemma!!!

[Vicky_Scot]

I started dressing at around 11 years old and have been for the last 39 years. I have a wonderful wife who knows all about Vicky and accepts her as part of me. The problem I have is that I know that I am not transsexual and do not want to transition but although I can dress when ever I want at home (except when family/friends are in) I have this overwhelming desire to dress more or less full time now. What's a gurl to do?

[Beverley Sims]

Go with the flow, dress more frequently, go at a pace that is acceptable to your wife and don't push it too hard.

If your wife objects, back off a little.

[kimdl93]

I know the feeling. It seemed for a time that it almost hurt to change back to male mode. Still unless you were inclined to go full time and be totally out, you still have to find a way to make due. Enjoy the considerable freedom you and acceptance that you have, and think of how fortunate you are when you are unable to dress.

[Rayleen]

Vicky, good advice from Bev and Kim. A good communication is essential , also go slowly and enjoy yourself

Hug, Rayleen

[Pat]

You don't have to be transsexual to dress full time. You just have to dress full time. Do what makes you feel happiest -- keeping in mind that happiness includes the wife -- for as long as it makes you happy. When it stops making you happy, stop doing it. Pretty simple rules. ;)

[Krisi]

If dressing is not hurting your relationship and isn't getting in the way of doing things you need to do, fine, dress all you want to. If it's getting in the way of other hobbies or chores like mowing the lawn or washing the car, you're going to have to cut back.

[Amelie]

One doesn't have to transition to have the desire to live like a woman all the time.There are non op trans people who live as women but don't transition as in surgery. You may have these feelings too, but you have a shared life with your wife which is to be considered.

[Stephanie47]

What would the ramifications if you were to dress full time? With your wife? With your employer and fellow employees? With your friends and family? I would think the experience of dressing among people who are not supportive of that lifestyle would be totally different than dressing around an accepting wife. There is nothing stopping you from slowly achieving this goal.

[Sidney]

It's kind of ironic but before I came out to my wife I found it an almost overwhelming NECESSITY to dress and a need in order to feel feminine and sometimes resenting the times I couldn't . Now since coming out and accepting the persons I am and having the freedom to dress I still enjoy dressing but have found I can feel feminine without being dressed. It's what inside the package that counts, not the wrapping.

[Joyce Swindell]

My 2 cents.... when my wife and I go away for the purpose of me dressing it is always hard to go back to my male side. I'm not ready to rock my world by coming out and going full time fem. I imagine such awesomeness but the reality is earlier statement... I'm not interested in upsetting my whole world. So we will plan a vacation together where I can be this part of me for an entire week. But..... when it happens and it's time to end I may have a tougher time letting it go....or just be greatful for the experience and get to planning​the next one!

[ClosetED]

What is the current level of dressing? You can dress whenever you want at home, but do you? Or do you feel that your wife would prefer you didn't and so you limit it? If so, tell your wife you want to experience a prolonged time dressed and try it for a week 24/7. And that you would love her help to make sure you get a full experience. She make choose things for you to do or wear that she feels may open your eyes, but should make it enjoyable for her as well.
Hugs, Ellen

[Cassandra Lynn]

I think that ebb and flow of intense needs is a fairly common occurrence in all of us, and affects us regardless of where we sit on the gender spectrum.

Or maybe hills and valleys is a better analogy.

As is being said above, you've got to adjust as it comes and goes, balance it to the best of your ability, and make sure when your on that upward (and intense) trend your staying within the happy zone, you and your awesome wife have set.

[KelleyB]

Go with the flow, dress more frequently, go at a pace that is acceptable to your wife and don't push it too hard.

If your wife objects, back off a little.

THIS ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I went too quickly, and got sent back to Go!, do not collect $200.

[Alice B]

I also find mysef wanting to dress more often and have taken to wearing my forms a great deal more. My wife has commented on this, but has not told me to stop at thisd time.

[Tracii G]

I don't know why people have such a hard time doing what they want to do.
Is it that you don't accept who or what you are? Still worried about what others think?
Free your mind your ass will follow.

[Dana44]

Dress the way you want to. Just keep your wife happy.

[RADER]

I found out that since I am now retired, I have more time to dress. SO the more I dress.
But when the wife was around, I took it slow. She liked it better that way.
Rader

[Stephanie Kimberlie]

A wonderful outlook.

[Becky Blue]

Vicky, I think you are being held back by labels, you say you are not transexual and you don't want to transition, yet you feel like you want to dress almost full time, some would say that is transitioning. Whatever 'they' may define you as is irrelevant, I say just go with the flow of course being very aware of you wife's feelings on the matter.

[Shely]

I have also found this to be a problem since I've retired. I dress each, and every, chance I get during the day even if it's only for a couple of hours. This afternoon I dressed all up for 4 hours and hated to dress back in my old clothes, Before my wide gets home. She knows I dress, but doesn't want to see me dressed. I used to be happy dressing once a week, but no more. I'd gladly throw out all my men's clothes, if I just could. I have been shopping for all things feminine, earrings, make up, shoes, stockings, tec. It is overtaking me.

[DaisyLawrence]

You don't have to be transsexual to dress full time. You just have to dress full time. Do what makes you feel happiest -- keeping in mind that happiness includes the wife -- for as long as it makes you happy. When it stops making you happy, stop doing it. Pretty simple rules. ;)

Yeah, that!

[Jenn26]

Great advice from Cassandra Lynn - go with the ebb and flow. I know I feel the same way too many times. As long as you two are good with the amount, go for it.