phili
03-24-2018, 10:25 PM
Hi All,
For those who wish they could just enjoy the pleasure of feminine clothing, and enjoy the walk, and the lovely inner feelings, and don't feel the need for the complications of also trying to look a lot like a female- there is hope! Granted, I live in a liberal and well-educated region, and I'm retired so not under the control of others. But even when I go to shopping areas that are not liberal or well-educated, just civilized with normal values of decency towards others, I get the same treatment.
People just stare a little, or are a little stiff and formal, or are just friendly and normal, at ease and making conversation. Someone might joke, such as saying - 'must be really good weather outside', or might point me to the men's dressing room, or otherwise just try to cope with something unusual in a calm manner. But over and over, I find that once everyone realizes, after a few minutes, that the sky is not falling, they just decide they can relax. People are challenged, sure, just as they are by any cross-dresser, no matter how good the disguise may be. But as a rule they decide to be tolerant, to be courteous, and to let themselves see that this is not really a problem. Their children are never worried- just curious. If they want to explain to their children later, they'll also need to be truthful to what everyone could see.
What they see is that I am relaxed and obviously feel perfectly normal.There is no rough edge or pain in being around me. I am conversational in a normal way for me., and it is clear I am an ordinary guy, happy, peaceful, not pretending in any way. The only odd thing is that I am wearing a dress and treat it as normal!
I feel that about a third of the people I am in contact with for very long become relatively happy with my example, since it breaks the underlying sexual tension expected between men and women, and lifts the competitive yoke on men. The simplicity of what I am doing clearly shows everyone that dress codes are not linked to anatomical biology, and that starts to unwind a lot of things. It creates a safe place for women to speak, and every so often, they do, coming up and giving positive strokes, admiring my outfit and striking up a conversation about fabric, etc. They tend to be self-assured, those who like sewing, and those that are sympathetic to men wishing that they could escape the 'man' prison which causes so much grief for women and men alike. Women who are uncertain appear either nonplussed, coping with religious teachings, or perhaps just aggravated that a man is invading their cultural space. Some men are uncertain, timid, or jealous. Most men just avoid looking, and tend to their women or friends. The clothes I wear are triggers for men's sexual urges, but, although difficult for them, the lesson is there- clothes don't make the woman. That is a step in the right direction.
I find that my initial fears disappeared in the light. I feel good, right, peaceful, and there really is no valid reason for denying me this pleasure. Everyone of us is finding our way, and while we have rules and expectations, etc. life opportunities are restrained too much for most people. People are uplifted a bit because I am taking a stand that is reasonable. I am stable, and responsible, and friendly and present, that makes it easier for everyone to understand. I see them coming to their conclusions, so I can just live my truth. I am not trying to influence them except by my example.
Did I say I am ecstatic? AT LAST I can just enjoy these girly things in ordinary society, and they are just as good as I imagined. I feel it is lovely to be alive, and yet I literally feel I am so happy I could die- which may seem strange. I guess it is a testimony to how deeply I felt I wasn't really living- or more accurately, still needed to feel the real 'I' is living. So it is sort of like finding the meaning of life.
I had already found a lot of other good meanings, like helping people, but not being able to enjoy these simple pleasures of the feminine cultural style was a form of imprisonment. It is clear to me that I am breaking jail.
All this makes it easier for me to go drab for the benefit of my wife. I don't feel I am never going to know myself fully, and I can be thoughtful about what I do and where.
BTW The belt you see is my own invention, a man's silk tie with a buttonhole sewn in near the point, which then, between that and the loop already sewn on the back side for the back part of the tie to go through, makes it easy to invent all sorts of beautiful ways to tie it as a sash. Great for any plain waisted dress!
So if you wish upon a star about having wonderful days out- I'm happy to chat here or by pm.
Phil
289969289970
For those who wish they could just enjoy the pleasure of feminine clothing, and enjoy the walk, and the lovely inner feelings, and don't feel the need for the complications of also trying to look a lot like a female- there is hope! Granted, I live in a liberal and well-educated region, and I'm retired so not under the control of others. But even when I go to shopping areas that are not liberal or well-educated, just civilized with normal values of decency towards others, I get the same treatment.
People just stare a little, or are a little stiff and formal, or are just friendly and normal, at ease and making conversation. Someone might joke, such as saying - 'must be really good weather outside', or might point me to the men's dressing room, or otherwise just try to cope with something unusual in a calm manner. But over and over, I find that once everyone realizes, after a few minutes, that the sky is not falling, they just decide they can relax. People are challenged, sure, just as they are by any cross-dresser, no matter how good the disguise may be. But as a rule they decide to be tolerant, to be courteous, and to let themselves see that this is not really a problem. Their children are never worried- just curious. If they want to explain to their children later, they'll also need to be truthful to what everyone could see.
What they see is that I am relaxed and obviously feel perfectly normal.There is no rough edge or pain in being around me. I am conversational in a normal way for me., and it is clear I am an ordinary guy, happy, peaceful, not pretending in any way. The only odd thing is that I am wearing a dress and treat it as normal!
I feel that about a third of the people I am in contact with for very long become relatively happy with my example, since it breaks the underlying sexual tension expected between men and women, and lifts the competitive yoke on men. The simplicity of what I am doing clearly shows everyone that dress codes are not linked to anatomical biology, and that starts to unwind a lot of things. It creates a safe place for women to speak, and every so often, they do, coming up and giving positive strokes, admiring my outfit and striking up a conversation about fabric, etc. They tend to be self-assured, those who like sewing, and those that are sympathetic to men wishing that they could escape the 'man' prison which causes so much grief for women and men alike. Women who are uncertain appear either nonplussed, coping with religious teachings, or perhaps just aggravated that a man is invading their cultural space. Some men are uncertain, timid, or jealous. Most men just avoid looking, and tend to their women or friends. The clothes I wear are triggers for men's sexual urges, but, although difficult for them, the lesson is there- clothes don't make the woman. That is a step in the right direction.
I find that my initial fears disappeared in the light. I feel good, right, peaceful, and there really is no valid reason for denying me this pleasure. Everyone of us is finding our way, and while we have rules and expectations, etc. life opportunities are restrained too much for most people. People are uplifted a bit because I am taking a stand that is reasonable. I am stable, and responsible, and friendly and present, that makes it easier for everyone to understand. I see them coming to their conclusions, so I can just live my truth. I am not trying to influence them except by my example.
Did I say I am ecstatic? AT LAST I can just enjoy these girly things in ordinary society, and they are just as good as I imagined. I feel it is lovely to be alive, and yet I literally feel I am so happy I could die- which may seem strange. I guess it is a testimony to how deeply I felt I wasn't really living- or more accurately, still needed to feel the real 'I' is living. So it is sort of like finding the meaning of life.
I had already found a lot of other good meanings, like helping people, but not being able to enjoy these simple pleasures of the feminine cultural style was a form of imprisonment. It is clear to me that I am breaking jail.
All this makes it easier for me to go drab for the benefit of my wife. I don't feel I am never going to know myself fully, and I can be thoughtful about what I do and where.
BTW The belt you see is my own invention, a man's silk tie with a buttonhole sewn in near the point, which then, between that and the loop already sewn on the back side for the back part of the tie to go through, makes it easy to invent all sorts of beautiful ways to tie it as a sash. Great for any plain waisted dress!
So if you wish upon a star about having wonderful days out- I'm happy to chat here or by pm.
Phil
289969289970