How difficult is it to pass as women?

[taylor12]

Hello

I hear many here do not pass but what is the main reason for that to not pass as a women?

I am planning my first proper dressed out in 30 days from now out as a CD but at remote area where less people are there. Clothes are either black peplum mini dress or spaghetti straps mini dress.

[Ressie]

The main reason is that we are men. We have men's bodies, men's faces, Men's big hands and feet. The list goes on....

[Micki_Finn]

I suppose it depends on what you mean by “pass”. Going unnoticed in a crowd from 50 yards away? Not terribly difficult. Interacting one-on-on and face to face? Much more difficult. I notice that you’re from India. I’m unfamiliar with the culture over there, and my understanding is that it’s not a country that’s terribly tolerant towards us, so please please please be very careful going out. If there are laws against that sort of thing where you live be even more cautious.

[Tracii G]

We walk like monkeys, grunt and scratch ourselves too.
Facial structure, beard shadow about a million things give us away.
A remote area late at night can be dangerous so pick a place to go during the daytime where there are lots of people.
Its a lot safer that way.

[mykell]

i think the key is to pass as your"self" first.
once you are over the fear that some will figure you out and it does not matter then you are ready to mix upon folks in the wild.
you wanting to go to a remote area with less people in a mini dress does not sound like the right formula unless you were going to a club to socialize.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I don't know about India, but I find a lot of GGs walking around who don't pass as women.

In the 50s and 60s when all woman were petite, even an average sized dude would stick out in a crowd.

Now with the obesity epidemic, larger woman have made it much easier for many men to pass aa a woman in plain sight.

I think my voice and comportment are my biggest "tells".

[Jaylyn]

As already said be careful in India. You look tall and slender and I really think small long boned guys have an advantage over us brutes that are big shouldered and lots of bulky muscle. Your dress looks nice.

[Dana44]

It is best to go out in day and where three is people around. Blending in is best also. I think you look good enough.

[Pat]

In the 50s and 60s when all woman were petite...

What? :eek: Perhaps you mean when they were trying to make larger, non-conforming women invisible? I'm pretty sure non-petite women are not a recent invention.

I note the Indian Supreme Court has made a number of decisions endorsing transgender rights over the last few years and several state-run businesses have tried to accommodate transgender folks, so maybe things are changing there just like they're changing elsewhere in the world. Still, it's always correct to stay aware of your situation when out and about. ;)

[Jodi]

I pas the 200/200 test. I'm totally passable at 200 yards and at 200 mph. Otherwise there are enough tells that something will give me away

Jodi

[Micki_Finn]

You do know that Marilyn Monroe was a size 16 and by modern standards would be considered a “Plus Size” Steffi?

[Helen_Highwater]

Taylor,

One way people give themselves away is by being furtive, skulking about. Confidence is key. Looking like you belong goes a long way. As said many times, you need to dress appropriately for the time and place. A GG in a ball gown will stand out in a supermarket.

As others have said you need to be careful. Sadly gang beatings and rape are not unheard of in India despite moves made by the judiciary. Goa as I'm sure you're aware is a favorite haunt of young western tourists/backpackers. You're probable safer in areas frequented by them but at the end of the day it's down to you to make those decisions as to where you feel safest.

I really hope it all goes well but please do your homework. Know the place you're going to. Trust your senses. If things feel wrong then they usually are. Time to leave.

[carhill2mn]

Perhaps, the "main reason" that CDs do not "pass" as women is that they have very strong male features. Features such as a large strong body, being tall, having large hands, and feet or a low pitched voice. These things would not seem to be an issue for you. Other things that can be issues are how you walk, how you use your hands, how you move. If you are going to interact directly with others, how you speak can be an issue. Women usually speak differently than men.

Carefully choose where you will go. Sometimes you are less noticeable in a crowd than if there are few people around. Do not sneak around! Act as if you belong there. I do not know how it is in India but a small smile is a great way to help you be accepted as a woman even if you do not pass. Do not do things that will attract attention to yourself. Dressing similar to the people around you is best.

You will, of course, be very nervous when you first go out in public. Try to stay as calm as possible and be aware of what is going on around you. Avoid areas where there could be unfriendly people. Enjoy!

[Jenn A116]

Was interested to read the post about MM's size. Some googling however indicates that she was 5'6" and weighed about 120 lbs. Sounds like a size 4 or 6 today.

[Julie Martin]

Taylor,

I second what others have said about safety..if you are not sure how people in your area will react if they discover you are a crossdresser, please choose the area carefully, and have an escape plan if anyone gives you trouble..safety first!

Also as others have said..blending and passing are two very different things.

If you dress appropriately for your age, body type, and the location you will be going to, blending is not too hard..if you keep moving and don’t engage with anybody one-on-one…unless you are 6-4 or built like an NFL linebacker...then it’s unlikely!

PASSING is virtually impossible for all but a tiny fraction of crossdressers..
..passing (my personal definition anyway) means you could have a 10 minute conversation in bright sunlight with a teenage girl and her mom, and they would never suspect that you weren’t born a woman.
For this you either need:
-a totally convincing female voice (if they couldn’t see you they would still hear a woman), somewhat feminine facial features (think actor Orlando Bloom or similar), great makeup, and either your own long styled hair or a killer lace-front wig (for which you need a feminine face)..if you have all this, you could wear a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants and no shapewear and pass just fine

..or..
-a decent female voice, and be expert at hiding any strong male facial structure with hairstyle and makeup, and distracting with perfect shapewear and clothing selection..even then, unless you sound and look female from the neck up, anything else is moot

So Taylor..if you’ve never been in public crossdressed..go where there are people and you are sure it’s a safe area, and be happy to blend in. Save passing or close encounters for the future..if you are one of the lucky few who can really pass as a woman..you will know when you are ready.

Have fun, be safe!!

[Taylor Dame]

Taylor, Another male giveaway is a large adams apple. It seems you may have a noticeable one from your photo. You might consider a scarf or other neck wear to cover it up. Like others have said, it is very hard to pass when close up to others and speaking. At a distance, even tall individuals can pass because most people don't pay much attention to others.

[candice.aihara]

Most men don't have a feminine physique. For the few who do and dress, however, I'm sure they'll pass to a degree. I've been mistaken at first glance / blush several times. Although I can't remember the exact circumstances each time they've always occurred at dusk or afterwards. Perhaps it was my silhouette or general form when seen from several metres away.

[Judy-Somthing]

For me I'm 5"10" and 42" chest sz 18 in women's dresses I would say I could only pass at a distance in low lighting!
But I'm still having FUN!

[Sometimes Steffi]

What? :eek: Perhaps you mean when they were trying to make larger, non-conforming women invisible? I'm pretty sure non-petite women are not a recent invention.


Larger women are not a recent invention, but women were in large part 5-7-9, hence the name of the store.

My Dad was a shoe buyer, and he took me along on some of his buying trips. I remember one case specifically when he was closing the deal that he wanted shoe sizes 7, 8 and 9 (plus 1/2 sizes). He did not want any 10s because he couldn't sell them.

Today, I think typical sizes for women are 8, 9 and 10, and maybe 11, but size 7 is too small.

[Beverley Sims]

It takes a lot of time to disguise yourself properly, as previous posts have pointed out.

[Alice_2014_B]

It's all about our male features.

In the passing-arena I'm blessed with being short, small hands, and somewhat of a small shoe size (though size 9 U.S. can be considered kind of large for a woman).

:)

[AmandaM]

I would dress like the women around the area where you are going. I'm not sure the minidresses will work for a first time out. Those dresses will draw a lot of attention.

[Becky Blue]

Taylor, your question has a multitude of answers, there can be many reasons why people don't pass as well as many definitions of passing. Personally I like to call it blending, which means that if we have enough female outward markers most people don't look at us well enough to see past those initial markers. So if you don't have too many obvious prominent male markers you can blend in. Don't get fooled by some on here who claim that passing is easy and guaranteed if you look good enough, that's simply not the case unless your gifted with very few male markers.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Voice, physique, facial structure, beard shadow... many things. Passing is difficult even for the luckiest of us. You'd also be much safer, as others said, to go out during the day in a public place (ideally a place with surveillance cameras like a mall.)

Also, for what it is worth, big men and big women are built very differently.

Marilyn Monroe did not wear a size 16 in 1950s sizes, much less a larger modern size 16 "vanity size". https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/dressed-to-fill/

[Stephanie47]

The biggest obstacle of passing is standing out among the crowd. I'm six foot and 200 pounds. Even among men my age I stand out. In pictures with women in my family I stand out. How could I ever not stand out among the general public? I do not see very many women who are tall. When I do their facial features and frame are similar to shorter women. I concur with Steffi (#6, above). A cross dresser emulating a plus size shorter woman has a better chance of pulling it off. The added weight obscures the lack of a defined hour glass shape. Added mass on the neck area hides the Adam's apple. I do peruse on occasion the pictures of very attractive MtF cross dressers on the Internet. I do realize many of the photos may be photo shopped or clean up in the same manner a professional photographer may eliminate unwanted blemishes, but, there seems to be quite a few who pass lovingly. I have to assume I have passed some by in my daily travels, but, I have not noticed them.

My personal experience is east Indian women appear to be slighter in build and not as tall as American women. If that is the norm in Indian, then it may be more difficult to pass in Indian than in America. I have seen comments on this forum that men and women of the same ethnic and cultural background of a cross dresser can identify a cross dresser than the rest of the general population. I can only assume there are signs which giveaway the cross dresser that I am not be able to identify.

[Rachelakld]

For me, at 5 ft 7 and 81Kg,
I'm to old to worry about passing, or spending more than 5 minutes doing make up.

so my give aways
- Voice
- My square chin and 5 o'clock shadow
- My workouts at the gym and pools to build a strong, fit and lean body

[sometimes_miss]

I don't know about India, but I find a lot of GGs walking around who don't pass as women.
Right, but on closer inspection it becomes clear that they ARE women. It works in the reverse of that for us; the closer inspection reveals that we aren't women


I think my voice and comportment are my biggest "tells".

I'm not out, so this is coming from someone who works with the public and needs to see who people really are in a very quick observation. The initial 'tell' will be either visual or sound. Voice is almost always the confirmation; even those CD or TS were still male when puberty hit, so their voices are not typical female about 99% of the time. Sure, there are some of us with Lauren Bacall lower register female voices, but those tick off people's radar to look for other clues to tell them what we are. Of course, if you look like Lauren did, then the inspection will almost instantly bring back the result of 'that person is female'. With us, that becomes either that person is male, or that person used to be male.

It only takes ONE tell, to begin someone's further inspection of us to turn up other clues that we aren't GG's.

In my experience, the first is usually how someone walks, because we see it at a distance. CD & TS often just overdo the female gait by just enough to draw extra attention to themselves just the way that a woman who puts a little extra swing in her hips, does. Now you might like to think, 'Oh, that means I'm passing!'. Nope. What you're doing is just drawing attention to yourself. THEN we start to look you over more carefully, for more clues as to who and what you are. A GG will give off plenty more clues that she is the genuine article. We don't. Sure, some of us will be able to pass the test in lots of other ways, but eventually something sticks out (pun intended) such as Adam's apple, forehead brow bone, bony knees, muscle definition, large/rough hands/feet (especially finger nails), hair where it usually isn't found on the 'model year' of woman that we're trying to portray (beard or overly covering a beard tone of skin are both give aways). And we collect all those bits of information in an instant. Then when the voice comes out, we're clocked.

That's how I spot one of us when they walk into the place I work. And it usually only takes a few seconds.

>99% of us will not pass in those first few seconds. Most of the other 1% will not either, under close inspection. We desperately want to believe that we pass. We come up with all sorts of rationals that support that idea. It's easy to get fooled by looking at 2D images where someone gets to put forth their best possible 'look', but put that person into real life up close, and the illusion disappears, just like the material called illusion that they use on ice skater costumes becomes very obvious that it's not the girl's actual skin.

That said, I wouldn't pass during a power failure in a coal mine at midnight, at 500 yards away.

[Krisi]

I don't know about India, but I find a lot of GGs walking around who don't pass as women.
Seriously? Perhaps some of us have a distorted view of women, but in my observation, 99.9% of women "pass as women". Perhaps they wouldn't be cast on a TV show as a women but they are clearly female.

Back on topic, some men can pass as women. The term "passing" is a moving target. Walking down the sidewalk 50 feet away? Many of us could pass. 20 feet away? Some of us could pass. Sitting in a restaurant at the next table for 30 minutes? Few of us could pass. Yet, there are men who will dress up as women, go to bars and fool men into buying them drinks and even having sex with them for money. So some men can pass pretty well.

You have to look ate yourself. If you are petite and work hard on the presentation, you have a chance. If you are built like Hulk Hogan in drag, not a chance.

[Robertacd]

I find that it's usually the face that gives us away. You sound confident and look pretty good, but at the angle you took your picture I can see your rather strong jaw line and it screams "I am a man".

It takes a lot of hair and make-up work to hide a man face.

The next thing I think is failure to balance our figure. Male shoulders are bigger and usually wider than their hips, women are just the opposite, GG shoulders are small and rounded and their hips are usually as wide or wider than their shoulders. I see a lot of us on here that do not pad their hips or butt and even talk about wearing a skirt two or more sizes smaller than their top. They look too broad shouldered and top heavy (specially if large breast forms are added), that is also a major give away.

[Sherri_Christopher]

If you dress appropriately for your age, body type, and the location you will be going to, blending is not too hard..if you keep moving and don’t engage with anybody one-on-one…unless you are 6-4 or built like an NFL linebacker...then it’s unlikely!


Yeah, this is the reality of the situation when one has a larger stature. I'm 6'2" tall, with wide shoulders, larger sized hands and have a deep voice. I did play football when in high school and was a defensive end, so there's no way somebody like me is going to pass. In the past, I have gone out to CD events and to places that were accepting for folks like us (gay and lesbian bars), but to just go to the mall or another public place like that while en-femme is out of the question for me, I won't pass and don't have the confidence to pull it off.

I get my height from my mom's side of the family. My mom was 6'2", but she was slender and a real beauty! Although I resemble her, I'm the guy version. :)

[Julie Martin]

Lexi, your assessment is spot on! Brutally honest and accurate! I am out..occasionally..and though you may see a GG in some of my photos..and I do have a good female voice..up close under scrutiny?? BUSTED!!

[Leslie Langford]

What? :eek: Perhaps you mean when they were trying to make larger, non-conforming women invisible? I'm pretty sure non-petite women are not a recent invention.

Say what??? How did "they" succeed in "...trying to make larger, non-conforming women invisible..."? Did this involve the assistance of the likes of a David Copperfield, or else a Star Trek-like cloaking device? Point is...there were far fewer of them around in those days compared to now...period.

Steffi is absolutely right. There is an epidemic of obesity going on these days in the Western World because of our addiction to empty-calorie junk food, and it affects both sexes. Did you ever notice when watching actual, real life historical documentaries from, say, WWII, how fit and trim the soldiers on both sides were back then compared to the more beefy current crop? And as for the typical out-of-shape, beer-bellied cops that are so common these days, let's not even go there...

Yes, women as a group are also far heftier than they used to be in the 1950's and earlier, as anyone who has ever walked through a shopping mall can attest to unless, of course, they are being guided by a seeing-eye dog. The average dress size for a woman these days is 14, whereas in the past, it was typically in the single digits. Genetics are also a factor here, and the younger women these days tend to be taller overall than their forebears. Size 10 used to be the normal upper limit for women's shoe sizes in "regular" stores. That has now moved up a notch to Size 11, and Size 12 is also now far more commonplace than it used to be.

So, if you combine the fact that women as a group are far larger than they used to be (both height and weight) and that they are gravitating more and more towards man-style and/or "unisex" type clothing, then yes, the lines between masculine-looking women and feminine- or androgynous-looking males are definitely becoming more blurred these day. That leaves us with facial features and mannerisms as being the final frontiers for us to cross in trying to either blend in or "pass" as women. Here, good makeup is definitely our friend, as are the many YouTube videos on female comportment that are well worth watching for pointers on how to emulate typical female mannerisms that we might otherwise have missed.

All that said, when it comes to "passing", our Asian sisters definitely have an edge over the rest of us with their typically smaller features, shorter statures, and general overall hairlessness. I'm not going to name any names here - you know who they are - but some of our fellow Asian Forum members here are absolute stunners. And if anyone really wants to make their own eyes bug out, all they need to do is watch one of the many YouTube videos featuring crossdressing K-Pop singing and dancing groups which seem to be all the rage there these days.

Talk about "making the boys cry", as our own michelledgg likes to put it.

[Tracii G]

People all over the world seem to be taller these days too and a bit stockier.
I have a close Chinese friend and he is 6'1" so Asians aren't always short in stature.

[Chloe St Clair]

For me I'm 5"10" and 42" chest sz 18 in women's dresses I would say I could only pass at a distance in low lighting!
But I'm still having FUN!

Judy, I humbly disagree. Based on the photo you've chosen for your avatar, I'd say you are being a wee bit hard on yourself. I think you look totally realistic and feminine.

[kimdl93]

I probably have as many tells as anyone...height, and masculine in shoulders, hands, facial structure throat. I dont even think about passing.

But i do know from trustworthy sources that im not grossly conspicuous either. When directly interacting with anyone, im sure i am considered a transwoman. From a distance no one can be sure.

Also Im not the tallest woman out there and in a country suffering an obesity epidemic, i have managed to stay fit...so some curves are in the right places.

And that’s good enough for me. I am.

[DIANEF]

To pass '100 per cent'?, almost impossible. Even if you look great something will give you away, your voice, big hands, adam's apple, any one of several things. Except for a really tiny minority, anyone who believes they pass completely is utterly self deluded.

[Ressie]

Based on the photo you've chosen for your avatar, I'd say you are being a wee bit hard on yourself. I think you look totally realistic and feminine.

Passing in a photo is much easier than passing in 3-D reality. The OP is talking bout passing in the real world. I've met transgenders that are very passable up close, in person, but not many. I haven't met Judy-Something but being 5'10" per se isn't a deal breaker. I'm sure Judy knows her limitations.

Chloe, once you get your 10 posts you'll have access to many great photos of the members here! So many gorgeous photos and some that you will swear will be passable up close.

[natalie edwards]

Well I was just chatting with a guy on Facebook and he was telling how beautiful I look and how he wants to meet me, etc,etc. Then says " can I ask you something?" Why are so many crossdressers on your page? LOL! I answer because I'm one too! He still doesn't believe me. Then asks if I have man parts. Then he doesn't believe that I do and starts apologizing for saying something wrong thinking I'm making all this up so he goes away! Finally he says he doesn't care if I have one he loves me! OMG! From a 5 minute chat?
So yes pictures can definitely be deceiving.

[kimdl93]

Wow, poor guy. I would guess he has considerable difficulties in developing real world relationships.

[Tracii G]

Natalie middle eastern men hit me up all the time and I tell them and its like no no no you are a woman I know you are.
I think they are just really hard up LOL.
Passing in pics is a piece of cake but in real life not so much.

[Teresa]

Taylor,
I've realised looking for that Utopia is never going to happen there are numerous reasons why we don't pass, the important thing is stop looking for it and just be you . Your choice of clothes may or may not be suiatble for your intended trip , going OTT or out of context gives the game away as much as the male attributes you hopefully think you're hiding .

The saying is, " you can fool some of the people some of the time but not all of the people all of the time ! " The point is don't go out and try and fool them , it's not an act , you will get far more acceptance by being dressed appropriately and polite to people .

[natalie edwards]

Natalie middle eastern men hit me up all the time and I tell them and its like no no no you are a woman I know you are.
I think they are just really hard up LOL.
Passing in pics is a piece of cake but in real life not so much.

The desperation is ridiculous. And the pics they send lol. If mine looked all deformed like that I'd remove it myself!

[Tracii G]

Oh I get those pics too Natalie.LOL

[Celee]

I was going to comment on this but sometimes miss said it all perfectly.

[Stephanie Julianna]

OK. I was not going to bite but I will anyway. In my opinion it is always harder to pass when you are younger and the male hormones are at their strongest. Unless you are genetically gifted with a slight image and soft features like many Asian girls here and on the internet seem to be it simply is hard. However, for us older girls it gets easier with age. Simply because as the male hormones wane in men the estrogen in women is doing the same thing and we are meeting in the middle. Women's voice can get deeper and features get a little more masculine while men can get a bit softer looking. Being 69, I am observing women my age and even a bit younger and I am amazed how much easier it is for me to be out and about without raising an eyebrow. In my 30's I was blessed with nice skin and a diminuitive size so I just had to hide my biceps and enhance my makeup skills to pass. Now I can pretty much show it all without to much worry. Even getting older has it's benefits. In India I would still be very leary to test social norms there.

[natalie edwards]

Wow, poor guy. I would guess he has considerable difficulties in developing real world relationships.

I told him if he wasn't masturbating to a computer screen all day long maybe he could meet someone.

[kimdl93]

Lol. Great answer, and undoubtably true!

[Tracii G]

Good point Natalie.
Got a .dick pic last night by a guy from the Ukraine and I asked him what that was a pic of?
He said must be a language barrier LOLOL.

[Teresa]

Stephanie,
Does it get easier or do we just stop caring what people think ?

I have the age battle sometimes , am I getting too old for all this then the makeup goes on and it's a resounding no , the lifestyle is so much more enjoyable and fun . The last thing I would want to do is look through the male racks in clothes stores but I don't think I shall ever tire of checking out the female ones . To hold a dress against yourself and check it out in the strore mirror without anyone batting an eyelid is wonderful . Going back to the question of passing , it's moments like that when it feels 100% .

[CaseyAdams]

I'm not sure if we really have to pass as long as we appear friendly. A nice smile seems to go along way and others tend to reciprocate. Those that don't, I ignore!

[docrobbysherry]

Taylor, to answer your question' "Yes! It's hard to pass as a woman." So hard, that most here, even those that go out often never have! I know, because I go out often among Vanillas. I'd say easily over 100 times. And, how many times did I pass? Maybe 5?:sad:

The question u should ask is, "How do u know when you've passed?" The answer is, "You'll KNOW!":heehee:

Because when people mistake u for a woman with no 2nd thots, they treat u quite DIFFERENTLY than if they "aren't so sure".:D

[Aunt Kelly]

You are so, so right, Casey.
This topic comes up on the regular, enough so that it grows tedious to discuss, but what the hell...
First of all "passing" is a loaded term, and typically involves some assumption about the subject. In other words, "passing" means one thing for a crossdresser. It means something else to a transsexual who has transitioned. Unless or until we provide some context, we can only speak in general terms. With that in mind, I'll say (yes, again) what I always say. Very few of us actually pass when even to most cursory of attention is paid to us. There are so many cues that give us away that once one is picked up, the rest will be examined in short order and the game is over. Blending, on the other hand, means simply escaping that first notice, which is not nearly as hard. Easier for some than others, but again, we're speaking in general terms.
But to get back to Casey's observation, "blending" is, in my book, much more that escaping notice that would invite further scrutiny. Comportment, "acting like a lady", if you will, matters even more once we've been "read". The confident smile and pleasant demeanor will do much to get people to respect you and your presentation. If, on the other hand, you behave like a nervous, guilty-looking, man in a dress, the reaction you receive is likely to be less... kind.

[LexiNexi]

Its not easy! The one thing I have learned is don't dress over the top. Dress like a normal girl would. I am a few months into my transition into being a female responding really well to hormones and having laser hair removal so alot of head start and I have alot going for me like small stature/hands/feet and I still don't pass; just come off as really fem/gay boy. Voice gives it away. Any cross dresser that can pass has my envy and they put alot of work into it.

- - - Updated - - -


For me, at 5 ft 7 and 81Kg,
I'm to old to worry about passing, or spending more than 5 minutes doing make up.

so my give aways
- Voice
- My square chin and 5 o'clock shadow
- My workouts at the gym and pools to build a strong, fit and lean body

If you use foundation or concealer thats the same as your face color it works wonders. Even before I got laser on my face a one minute application of concealer and the 5 oclock shadow completely goes away; all day. The stuff is really amazing. Kind of tricky to put on because you want to rub it in but dabbing it on real thin is the trick. I sometimes use it on my arms to cover marks from needles from hormone shots.

Also great to cover track marks If you like to shoot up drugs :)

[suzanne]

For me, passing is impossible. I am 58 years old, bald and over 180cm tall and 140kg. That does not prevent me from putting on a dress and going out in public. I am, however, selective about where I go while dressed. If I feel there will be hostility toward me, I don't go alone. But I am discovering that very few people in my part of the world pay much attention to me, and I do not get negative comments or hostility from anyone. But my experiences may be of no use to you in India.

[jennifer0918]

Just remember my friend cover girls don't cry once the mask is on ,scars to beautiful. ..your so beautiful

[Queen Bridget]

Passing is easier the younger you are. I used to be passable in my teens. But when you hit your twenties, your face begins to mature and look more masculine.

It's something that's very noticable if you go to places like the Crossdressing Reddit page. Nearly all of the "Passable" CD's there are young guys in their late teens or early twenties.

Of course there is also the "Genetics lottery". Some people are just born lucky and can pull it off naturally.

[Vicky_Scot]

I don't know about India, but I find a lot of GGs walking around who don't pass as women.

Totally agree with that statement 100%

[BrendaPDX]

As others have said, dress for the venue and time of day. Your dress, while it looks very nice and passable on you, will only attract extra scrutiny if it is out of place for where you are. But on the good side, you look passable, stay safe and have fun. Have you thought of making contact with another CDer?

[char GG]

If I may make some suggestions; these are things I noticed when I went out with my SO's support group.

Don't overdo the eye makeup.
Never use blue eye-shadow.
"Cat eye" makeup is not day-wear unless you are in your 20's. Save it for the club.
Don't sit with your legs apart.
Don't walk with your legs apart.
Make sure your forms are in proportion to your body. Nothing calls attention to you faster than DD's in a tight top. (Save the tight stuff for the club)
Don't eat like you are at a trough, (that is with your head just inches away from your food and stuffing it in your mouth like someone may steal it from you).
Don't wear stripper-wear to the mall or to family restaurants (save it for the club).
Be polite and friendly.
Generally, people out in public don't care about you so don't slink around like you are hiding something.
Smile.

[gender_blender]

It generally requires 2 feminine traits to offset a single male trait. For some, the effort needed is too substantial. Others don need to pass to obtain satisfaction. Depends on the individual. I found that taking hormones and getting my eyebrows done helped me pass the most.

[Krisi]

I don't know about India, but I find a lot of GGs walking around who don't pass as women.


Totally agree with that statement 100%

Please take a moment to stop and think how insulting that statement is. These "non-passable" women are human beings, somebody's daughter, somebody's sister, somebody's wife and somebody's mother. Perhaps they are not up to your standards but have a little respect and compassion.

[docrobbysherry]

Krisi's rite. But, on the other hand, some women don't care or need to "pass". Why? Because they r women. :daydreaming:

The reason many of us want to is because we r NOT!:heehee:

[Teresa]

Sherry,
To answer your reply ( 51#) It is quite funny to be in that sitaution , I was discussed by a husband and wife, the wife read me the husband wouldn't hear anything of it , I just sat back and took in their discussion . It was when the wife was looking for the paper I had been reading and I stood up and walked over to ask if she would like the paper , the look on the husband's face was priceless !! Maybe I should have offered to buy him a drink he looked like he needed one !

[char GG]

So, Sometimes Steffi, do you mean that if men don’t look like, say for instance, Brad Pitt, they don’t pass as men? GG’s don’t have to be petite, young, or fit whatever your vision of a GG is. They are GG’s by default.

[Shelly Preston]

The saying is, " you can fool some of the people some of the time but not all of the people all of the time ! " The point is don't go out and try and fool them , it's not an act , you will get far more acceptance by being dressed appropriately and polite to people .


I usually say that Teresa but I agree being yourself is actually easier. I did not mean you are setting out to fool them.

Although to someone looking from the outside of the community that is how it may seem.


Char GG is absolutely correct women come in all shapes and sizes just like men.

[Barbara Jo]

Things that I have found out....

1) the older you get, the easier ir is to pass because as humans age, males and females tend to get gender neutral in appearance. ...females start to look more masculine and males look more feminine.
2) Females come is all shapes and sizes. For example, Kaley Cuoco (TBBT) has for a female, rather broad shoulders coupled with narrow hips .
Females, learn to use clothing types to mask their flaws and accent their good points
3) You must dress your age and given situation. Fetish clothes are definitely out.

Having said all that....
As long are you are reasonably feminine in face and body when dressed, anyone can pass.
By pass, I mean just walking down the street.... in the mall etc.... in some stores ,
Interacting with people, other that smiling, can be a different story of course but , that can come as confidence grows.

Finally.......
4) You must have the attitude that you are not doing anything wrong and are just wearing exactly what other females are wearing.
You must think that you have every right to wear what you are wearing.
So, there is no reason to be nervous. You can even browse the lingerie sections alongside other females and no one will give you a second look.

People can notice nervousness and it will attract attention.
If you act like you are doing something wrong, people will just assume that you are up to something / doing something wrong.

[Shely]

Passing is a myth for most of us, but going out can be fun anyway. I was at the mall Monday, my first real outing, and I had a ball. I was spotted by a couple of women, one was at the beauty counter, she gave a warm smile, way more that a perfect stranger should get. No problem, i was comfortable and having a great time. I was dressed modestly, but thoroughly, with hip pads, jewelry my new grayish wig, thinking i will blend in 100%. I did venture into a middle eastern dress store to look at some beautiful full length gowns, with sequins and details out of this world. the SA strolled over to me and I said these are beautiful, to which she said, "and you are beautiful" No s**t. I didn't know what to say, so i said "i just love women's clothes, men's so are boring". She smiled, so i asked her if she would take my picture. here it is:
291182

[Barbara Jo]

Fact is.. there are some fairly masculine looking females .
I have also seen men with tiny hands and females with man size hands.... men with wide hips and females with narrow ones. There are men with high pitched voices and female with low pitched ones..etc...etc.
It's all about how you carry and present yourself.

People just do not view every female thinking that they might be a man, unless you you give them reason to think so.

Also, consider this.....
In this day and age, someone might indeed senses that you were born a male but, they may also think that you might very well be transitioning into female and have a bit of respect for you.

Haters will always exist and this is why you have to be careful about where and when you go somewhere.