Do you think femine

[Tamsin Secret]

Simple question, so many interpretations.

I'm a man but I know that my approach to many things are considered alternatively.

I'm not out to anyone apart to my wife but even before then she would say she wondered how I viewed things.

Is it the fem side in us shaping our opinion or is it just natural inquisitiveness.

Not sure, please discuss :battingeyelashes:

(Scewed up title sorry!)

Tammy

[Samm]

Hi Tamsin. So to your question "Is it the fem side in us shaping our opinion or is it just natural inquisitiveness"
My initial answer was "aren't they the same thing?" And I think I'm going to stick with that answer.:) Because I see the one word that jumped out at me: natural

[Sami Brown]

I think parts of my personality are feminine. I feel I have more empathy than the average male. I also was never much into things many men are interested in (hunting, etc.)

Having said that, it's not completely that way. I am a big football enthusiast, and even got my wife into it. I also quite assertive in my profession.

I don't know whether I am explaining it very well, other than I have always felt that my mind and heart has been more feminine than the average guy, despite some decidedly male traits.

Sami

[Stephanie Julianna]

I know I think feminine more than masculine almost all the time. When I look at women on TV or out in the world I am always checking out their makeup or how they put their outfit together, Almost always love their shoes. If they are short and blond I always take note of their look and what might work to improve my own look. As a professional, Registered Nurse, I always draw from my feminine side to be the most supportive and sensitive caregiver that I can be. I will also have to admit that in some ways I have been just a bit closer to my daughters and granddaughters even though I am close with my son and grandsons as well. It's just the way I am wired.

[Beverley Sims]

Admiring dresses and lingerie in a department store, sampling perfume and makeup.

This is not really a masculine trait.

Admiring a striking girl walking down the street.........

Now that's a thought.

I do all of these things, so I am screwed too. :-)

[Aunt Kelly]

We are on dangerous ground when we start labeling this or that trait or thought as "feminine". I am reminded of a lesbian coworker I once had. Rather butch, I am sure she paid far less attention to ladies fashion than I do, but we still shared a great deal in common in our views of various things. So which of us was more feminine, or less? Why?
The point I am trying to make is that the things that make up our likes and dislikes, or just the way we view the world, are far more complex than can be simply attributed to stereoptypical gender roles. That's not to say that those roles don't shape us as we develop as individuals, but the genesis of any given "thought" is far more complex than can be accurately attributed to genetics or conditioning.

[Rachelakld]

Like Bev said...

Sometimes I see women in nice tight jeans and think "I'd like to get into her pants" but never quite sure if it's fem or masculine thought, or maybe both genders in an agreement.

I can't think of a car engine in a fem way (my masculine way wants to "modify" the engine for more power)
and I can't look at pretty dresses in a masculine way (my girl side wants to know what I look like with it on).

[Rayleen]

Yes Tamsin , My thinking and my attitude are much more on the feminine side.
I have more female friends that I communicate than men.
I observe more the feminine trend in clothing than males.
I can detect other men that are the same way, and wonder if other women will notice us men like that are like me.
A good question and another subject.

[Stacy Darling]

Wow, How does my mind think?

I can't overcomplicate this one for myself, cos I just can't!

I let my run with whatever it wants, never typically gender specific, and would never want to think in either way specifically.

Part of our freedom is to let our thoughts run free and let them create who we will be!

I will tick the more femme box though.
Stacy!

[mykell]

To me, when men talk, especially with other men, it all seems so... simple. Because of A, it's B. Because B, it's C. Therefore, D. Linear thinking. I can understand them, but it's always been difficult to relate to them in a way that makes me feel like I'm really being understood.

I won't speak for other women, but I feel like my thoughts are distinctly less linear and fuzzier than most men I know, at least as far as I can tell. I'm almost never processing one stream of thought, and when I try, it's often interleaved with other related things. My world is connections. Connections between me and others, connections between experiences, and connections between thoughts. With respect to thoughts...

My mind feels like an infinite web of emotional connections between things. It's never, "something bad happened today, and that sucks. Moving on." Very occasionally,(snip).............................

so in an older gender fluid thread before the non binary section existed i was challenged to describe how i felt like a women, quite a task.....the above quotation was a eureka moment for my "self".

.....then it occured to me i could not describe what it feels like to be a man either. describe tasks yes.....feelings not so much.....now after being out as a women i can describe feelings i have had as a women....

some good reading here that may reasonate with the topic tamsin. some deep stuff....

GGs how do you feel : https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?231501-GGs-only-please-quot-HOW-do-YOU-FEEL-quot&highlight=what+does+it+feel+like+to+be+a+women
feel to be a man thread : https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?239992-For-those-who-identify-as-quot-just-a-CD-quot-how-does-it-feel-to-be-a-male&highlight=what+does+it+feel+like
gender fluid thread:https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?239418-Defining-Gender-Fluid

[DMichele]

Tamsin,
Today my thinking is on a gender spectrum biased towards the feminine side. If I can explain; at one time I was very into the major US sports ala typical guy, but today I just get the results and have more interest in the human nature side of sports and athletes. When out and about shopping, etc. have no reservations about anything female related, even while in the male work attire. In the past I was not as revealing of the feminine side.

[Tracy Irving]

I think like me, whatever that means.

[Helen_Highwater]

Tamsin,

I guess I know what it is you're trying to say but it is one of those things that's very hard if not impossible to quantify. This is in the main due to not really knowing how a GG thinks. When dressed I guess I act more feminine, mannerisms etc. and I suppose you could put that down to thinking more fem. I'm certainly not of the stereotype typical male in as much as I'm not prone to aggression and I've always been sympathetic towards the lives of others around me.

So I have to say the answer is I don't know.

[Julie Martin]

My wife and I often discuss and are amused by the radically different way we often react to the same situation. She has tried to explain to me the way her mind works in various situations, and I try to get my head around it. I can grasp it on an intellectual level, but can't imagine what it would be like to really have a female brain and thought patterns..as she says "it's a scary place, men would run screaming in the other direction if they really understood how we think "..but discussing it really helps us understand each other!
But in trying to get into her head and listening to her, I realize that I definitely see the world as a man..the feminine side is more of an observer in my case.

[Teresa]

Tamsin,
It's difficult to say what effect our femme side makes because many of us were born with the trait so our thinking has always had some bias . Some time ago a question was posed, I recall I answered then that I don't know what it's like to answer it as a guy because part of my brain seeing it in a different way . We are as we are, all I know is I'm comfortable as I am .

[Nikki A.]

I think like me, a very screwed up warped thought process. Not being a woman, I'm not sure how they think (could never really figure out either wife), but on the other hand I'm not your typical dude either.

[Amelie]

To be able to think one needs a brain, that would rule me out.

Because I don't have much in the way of brains, I don't even know what it means, feminine? I have no idea what I do is fem or male, I just think as me, well, when I am able to think.

I think the word feminine is a made up idea that means absolutely nothing.

[Barbara Black]

I agree with Sami's view of how it goes for me, feminine empathy and sympathetic nature. I have the 'required' male traits, but I haven't decided which of them was natural and which were enforced and trained by going through life as a man. I certainly did my part as a male as a professional, but... who trained who?

[sometimes_miss]

Always interesting to read how MEN believe they know how women think, and just how far away they are from even having a clue. Why? Because you assume that women want the same things that you do, and communicate the same way. They don't.

Try reading the differences, you can start here: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Listen-Women-Cant-Read/dp/0767907639/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1524967975&sr=8-3&keywords=allan+and+barbara+pease
and then if you find that fascinating, look through the bibliography and read further.

Thinking 'like a woman' isn't what you think it is.
It's not all about having similar desires, wanting to put on nice clothes, or having sex being the submissive or penetrated partner. It's not about walking down the street having the wind up your skirt; its' more about walking down the street, wondering if the guy who's been walking behind you for the past three blocks is following you, as you clutch your purse just a little closer to your body.

Women really do see the world differently than we do, and don't necessarily want similar things to us. The best example in my mind today?

Read a complaint by a woman who hates getting dick pics sent to her. Men automatically assume that since men love to look at women's genitalia, well then all women must also love to look at men's genitals, right? NOPE.

Same with sex. Any man just assumes that he will have an orgasm every time he has sex; he cannot even contemplate wanting to have sex if he knew that he wasn't going to come. But tens of millions of women will be able to tell you how sex even without an orgasm can be quite an enjoyable thing, because they did it last night. How many men would say the same thing?

Go'est thou and learn.

[SaraLin]

The question posed in the OP is one I've ???wasted??? a lot time thinking about in years past, and here's about the best answer I could come up with...

It seems that for me, I tend to think in the STYLE of a male. I tend to see a situation and look for a solution, which I'm told is a typical male-oriented approach.

But - I find that the things I think about aren't typically male. Sports, mechanics, sexual conquests, competition, dominance, power, leadership - all that stuff isn't in my mindset.

I'm not a leader, I'm a cooperator. I'm not trying to be in the lead, I want to get everyone to succeed. Love is about making my partner happy/fulfilled - not in 'getting what I want'. I don't complain about doing the dishes or cleaning around the house, it needs to be done, and so I do my share. And yes - I'll comment on what Vanna is wearing and whether or not I like her outfit, without thinking of her sexually.
etc. etc. etc. In this, I feel like my mindset is more toward the feminine.

I can't bond with men. I don't understand them. I've had many female friends over the years and feel much more comfortable around them. I've even been told that I was "like one of the girls anyway"

So - I guess I'm somewhere in the middle.

SaraLin

[Rayleen]

SaraLin, I'm the same way, cannot bond with men , its like we're not on the same planet.

Rayleen

[KellyGCD]

I certainly feel as though there are aspects of my thinking that would be considered more feminine. As others have stated, my approach to dress and beauty are definitely more feminine oriented. I also feel like my compassionate, nurturing personality could be viewed as more feminine than masculine. Though certainly at times I feel as though my masculine side is at the forefront.

[TXSara]

Interesting question...

I would say I think like a dude most of the time, although I don't have quite the competitive drive that many men have. I also tend to be a bit more concerned about others' feelings than I think many other men are. I guess a bit of a blend...

Sara

[Becky Blue]

I think that I definitely think F in many respects.. There was a very interesting Documentary by Dr Michael Mosely 'Is your brain male or female?' after watching that I concluded I was a lot more F than M in my head... i too don't really bond with males, I find 'the guys' totally boring and don't have many traditional masculine hobbies.

[Raychel]

Nope, My brain is full guy, not sure that is so perfect.
It definitely does get me in trouble sometimes. :daydreaming:

Although I am not really sure how feminine thoughts are different in every day life
Other then the people you are checking out walking down the street.
I do know some women that have almost the same thought processes that I have.
I check out women and thing nice back side.
and women check me out and think, what an ass. :heehee:

I think about dressing feminine all the time. Does that count. :heehee:

[Georgina]

I know that my thinking is the same no matter how I am dressed. I may act differently in a dress or skirt but that is governed by the clothes and not brain.

[phili]

Don't most of us crossdress because we are trying to connect with, express, experience, and explore what is in our culture termed feminine- the other, the 'opposite', of what we are assigned and allocated to be and do and feel?

We are also trained to fear letting anyone know this.

I think that results in the difficulty I had getting deeper into the experience. When puberty hit I became a fetish lingerie dresser- thinking that feminine was the sensual arousal. I was stunned to realize that if you don't have a penis the array of sensations is very different.

As I learned to understand and articulate feelings just a teeny bit more, I thought feminine was nice, compassionate, compliant- and this was sometimes accessible to me for moments, but fraught with the basic fear that letting myself feel would ruin my ability to be stoic and endure all manner of pain for the larger good- my role in the world.

But we have mirror neurons that help us feel what others feel, and being around women fires them off all the time, so I am aware of feeling like a woman, or feminine, a lot.

Fast forward through an evolution in understanding that feminine exists only in contrast to masculine, and that the binary mythology has been so woven into every aspect of life that we mistakenly think of it as something of its own. I saw that love and tenderness themselves are not feminine or masculine, it is that the expressions of love and tenderness can be styled in either feminine or masculine ways. I think that means in practice that feminine or masculine styling is really extraneous, but part of the affirmation of our M or F that we are all doing constantly. We have to let go of one to have the other, and that seems dangerous or at least destabilizing.

I can now slip over the edge fairly easily, and experience a very vivid 100% actuality of being a non-ovarian woman. Literally everything looks and feels different, my energy and my interaction with the world is changed, I have no interest in the mechanics of things, the web of people and meaning comes to the fore and I have a completely different kind of equilibrium. Astonishingly, men suddenly seem very interesting, and I am deeply attracted to men- who now appear to me as the distant, desirable opposite, bearing all the things I am now missing.

[jacques]

hello,
I don't know what a man or a woman thinks or is meant to think.
Do my thoughts have to be binary?
luv J

[Richelle423]

I think that’s how my brain is wired. When I look at a woman wearing jeans I always think “ I wish I could get into those pants” then I come to a conclusion that they wouldn’t fit me they are not my size.

[Tamsin Secret]

So many interesting answers. Definitely made me think alot about how society and history has shaped understanding of male/female roles and expression.

[Majella St Gerard]

As I am a man, I can only think like a man.

[Dana44]

I think like me. but have some feminine qualities. But I sure don't think like a female.

[Vikky]

I think I have always been sympathetic to the female approach to life, the way of thinking even when acting as a guy and I often seem to gravitate towards females when in a group, so maybe there is something there.
When en femme I am only at home, but I think I tend to think female and consider the female way of things.
Just ramdom thoughts that may make sense to someone.
Vikky

[Lucia]

In regular life As a man, I thinking all the time as a man think and do what a man do . But when I am dressed as a woman I make a transformation of myself including thinking as a woman and in fact all my acts and main are totally fem.