Comprise

[Lori_Lyn]

My wife knows I like to dress, I came out to her a few years back.
She doesn't like it, but we comprised and she agreed I could dress at home
in the house. When she wasn't there. But now she never goes any where without me.
She has me take her every where so I can't dress. A comprise?

[2B Natasha]

YOU need to open that conversation again. This time stand your ground about time to do your thing. In a marriage it’s supposed to be a give and take that accommodate BOTH parties. MarrIge is not a one way street.

[Majella St Gerard]

seems like the only one compromising is you, time for a re-negotiation, she is sabotaging your alone time.

[Stacy Darling]

A familiar situation had here, and probably similar to others which are retired or which look after their partners.
What I've done is change my sleep pattern so that I have time after my wife goes to bed, she sleeps 12hrs though!
Finding someone for her to have coffee with or go shopping with is good as well. It's good for her health and mind to go out with others too!

We all need a little space for ourselves Lori_Lyn, not the Universe, just a little space!
Stacy!

[Tracy Irving]

There was a time when she wasn't always around. That allowed you some freedom to dress. Now that she goes nowhere the rules have changed. Just talk to her about it.

[carhill2mn]

Nope, I call that controlling.

[CoralReef]

its hard to say, but when i really have to dress i just do it. it sounds like you have a lot of thinking to do about how to re approach this so it's not combative. situations are hard to understand, maybe paint your nails for starters......

[docrobbysherry]

You're complaining to the wrong people, Lori. We can commiserate but we can't compromise.

Only your wife can do that!:brolleyes:

[Helen_Highwater]

Lori,

Your SO asking you to take her everywhere could be a sign of her fearing something. Leaving you alone to dress could for her be the start of you going on to ever bigger things. By "nipping it in the bud" she stops any further development of your dressing. This is possibly an indicator of your SO's insecurity as to where she thinks things could lead. She fears the worst. You need to have the talk and find out the reasoning for her demands for your attendance on each and every one of her outings.

[Beverley Sims]

It's about time to have another summit meeting.

Put dressing on the agenda.

[Teresa]

Lori,
I found they were happy to let the goalposts move, if you don't say anything they won't either ! So it's time to renegotiate , don't forget there are two parts to this equation and you have rights to live your life as you wish as well as your wife . Just because we are CDers doen't mean we have to give everything up to appease a partner .

[Stephanie47]

I read your bio page. Says you're retired. Retirement for both spouses can lead to renegotiating the stated and unstated or implied limits. Time for a serious conversation of your needs. If she has fears of the unknown maybe she needs to discuss her concerns with you. As you relate the situation to me it implies 'controlling' you. Even if I was not a cross dresser I would hate being 'joined at the hip.' She needs to develop separate interests. Separate vacations? Relatives to visit?

[Lori_Lyn]

That is what I was thinking as well, thank you all for your sound advice. Time renegotiate, a new compromise. Sorry about my spelling.

[Micki_Finn]

Have you tried “No thanks, I’m going to stay home today”?