View Full Version : What is the attraction of going out dressed
Sometimes Steffi
06-07-2018, 09:28 PM
There's a thread by Cathleen about why we dress if we don't go out. She restricted the responders to those who don't go out.
It seems like many of the responders to the other thread don't go out because they don't think that they could pass.
I think we all agree that most of us will never pass a close inspection. I'm 5'9" and I wear a size 12/14 dress and a size 10/12 jeans. That's about the average size of an American woman. Because I am average sized, I can say that I probably pass at 30 feet. I probably don't pass at 3 feet to someone not wearing "beer goggles".
And, I do go out, sometimes in a large group (50+), and sometimes in a smaller group (3-4). I go out because I can. I got to safe places and don't walk alone in dark alleys, so to speak. I love it when I get positive affirmations from GGs. To me, in indicates a level of acceptance. It also is an affirmation of my fashion style. I work very hard on my fashion style, and always try to look "well put together" whether I'm in an evening gown or yoga leggings. I always try to present different looks. I don't go out in sweats, because to me, that's not crossdressing. I could wear my own male sweats and not present female if I just wanted to wear sweats.
I used to underdress in panties all the time, but I hardly ever do now. I have a different outlet. I take a yoga class three time a week, and always go in feminine (think floral) yoga pants and a women's racerback or tank top.
Maybe someone else wants to comment.
ellbee
06-07-2018, 10:20 PM
Nowadays? Mostly because I can't be bothered to change. :heehee:
Then again, I also don't do the full en-femme thing anymore, either.
When I used to, years ago, my reasoning for going out (as a chick) was quite different.
Don't feel like getting into it all now, but I wanted to see how the other half lived, so to speak.
I also kinda needed, at the time, for others (friends & strangers, alike) to view & treat me as a GG. Or at the very least, as a "hot tranny." I like to believe I did a pretty darn good job, given the circumstances... So much so, that I ended up opening a whole new can of worms, with that.
Was a heck of an experience, and wouldn't have traded it for the world. Definitely needed it during that part of my life. These days? Not so much. I came, I saw, I went. :)
Nikki A.
06-07-2018, 10:22 PM
I go out dressed because I want to. I am a people person and like to interact with others.
Alice_2014_B
06-08-2018, 02:38 AM
For the most I do it for just the fun of it.
I love attention, the good kind of course.
And a while back it became my stand-up persona.
One store I walked into late one night dolled up (full story with pics here in a few days) the SA gal saw me from somewhat of a distance, said, "Hi" as she walked to continue helping another customer.
I just waved.
I already knew I had to talk to her (by now talking to SA's while en-fem is no issue) because I wanted to see if they had certain heels in my size.
As I'm looking and waiting she came over and in my un-disguised voice I asked her, "Did I look real when I came in the door?".
She said I did.
It's the small rewards like that.
:)
Helen_Highwater
06-08-2018, 04:06 AM
Steffi,
For me it's about fulfilling me as a person. When I dressed and stayed within the 4 walls of the house while initially ok after some time I knew that I felt stifled, that I needed to walk further than the length if the hallway.
Wanting to go out and having the courage to do so as well all know are two different things and it took many years, the support of those here and numerous baby steps before I truly ventured out.
Once out and having experienced the feeling of freedom that brings there was no going back. Going out dressed is just part of me, who I am, how I express myself.
True part of it is down to being able to experience wearing nice things and hopefully present well. 5'10", size 18 dress I'm a little taller than most GG's but not all. I can mingle well and a few random interactions have told me that it sometimes takes a second look before some folks realise I'm CD and not a GG.
As others have said, interacting with the muggles can be such a wonderful thing. Being treated as anyone else and for our part behaving like anyone else helps bring about a better more understanding society.
So I suppose if I had to sum it up then I'd say its about leading a normal life , just in different clothes.
Sashauk
06-08-2018, 04:08 AM
I think you are probably right, Steffi, in that the reason why a lot of us don't go out dressed is that we think we won't pass and will be ridiculed because of that - that's my reason for not doing it.
Personally I never wear anything but panties and virtually all the time I have a bra on. At the moment I'm sitting here in bra, panties, suspender belt, stockings, skirt and top. I will be going out shopping shortly so I will replace the skirt and top with jeans and a shirt. I wish I had the courage to go as I am but I know I never will. Even though I have replaced the skirt and top for traditionally male outerwear I will be fully female underneath, and the fact that I'm wearing a bra will be obvious to anyone who looks closely.
So does that count as going out dressed? Probably in some small way.
Teresa
06-08-2018, 04:19 AM
Steffi,
It was hard to reply to that thread because the qusetion was aimed at those who don't , I felt to give a balanced answer it could only come from members who had been gthrough that and now do go out .
I have to agree with Nikki, I'm a people person , I need and love that interaction . I can't believe in such a short time how comfortable I feel , dare I say normal ! As you say think about your appearance providing you do want to integrate , I know some like to stand out , well I always have my social group to let my hair down some and go a little OTT . Sorry to repeat the story again but I had a GG tell me she wished she looked like me when I was trying on a swimsuit in a Matalan store , that did turn the question of passing on it's head .
Elizabeth G
06-08-2018, 05:00 AM
I go out because I want to present as (to the best of my abilities) and be perceived as a woman. I want to be seen by others as I see myself.
Sherri_Christopher
06-08-2018, 05:13 AM
When I was in my 30s, I went out while dressed with members of my CD support group to CD friendly places and also to banquets. It did feel good. Nowadays though, I'm in my early 60s and I'm a tall person, 6'2" and broad shouldered and I would probably stick out like a sore thumb. I am making an effort to lose weight and have taken off quite a bit. I'm planning on moving out west to Colorado in another year, so I may go out while dressed there, perhaps in Denver. I'll have to investigate if there's any CD groups once I get there.
Angela Marie
06-08-2018, 05:54 AM
I dressed inside for a number of years. Just clothes, no makeup. But I wanted affirmation of my feminine side; which is why I began going out into the world. It was very difficult at first. I took some time off from dressing for about two years. Yesterday I went out en femme for the first time in a while. As I strolled through the stores I remembered why I found it so invigorating.
MarinaTwelve200
06-08-2018, 06:09 AM
Well, I don't go out, partly out of fear----But mostly because MY CDing is ABOUT "Getting away from MYSELF" and completely unwinding and relaxing. NOT about presenting myself as a female.--- I look good enough appearance wise, but I really don't have a passable feminine comportment. I have been out in public twice though---Once for Halloween party and another time in a Womanless beauty contest-------Those who DO go out, More power to you. YOU have needs that I do not
confused_cathreen
06-08-2018, 07:28 AM
Thank you Steffi for creating this thread, you are right, my question was limited to specific kind of CDers as it served a particular purpose. Reading your stories though made me wonder: does it make you feel good to be acknowledged when out and about? I went back to my own experiences and realised that women as a rule don't compliment others easily. I have never stopped someone in the street to compliment her on putting on a good look. I don't think I would do it with a CDer, I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be like everyone else 😉. Or does it make you uncomfortable to get attention? Bear in mind that attention comes both positive and negative and all of us flip a coin, not just CDers.
audreyinalbany
06-08-2018, 07:38 AM
I go out because it's gets boring staying home alone
phili
06-08-2018, 07:47 AM
For me the going out or not issue revolves around my sense of identity. I have a portion of identity that sustains me when alone- and how I relate to our environment and general survival needs. Another piece is my identity in relationships, and this is where gender comes into play- as it is a styling. Most of us we were told what our style had to be based on our anatomical sex. I have always felt discontent with the way the style expresses my sense of myself, and therefore with the relationships that were formed with me performing an essentially false or incomplete version of myself.
So now, going out is a way to form new relationships based on presenting myself and acting in accordance with how I actually feel. That brings an amazing sense of relief, of unity, of peace, joy, and creative energy. Sure, some people look at me and frown, or avert their eyes, but others smile and come forward, or just accept me as another strand of the diverse public, and every experience like that wipes away the notion that I am unacceptable, and which kept me hiding for so long.
I particularly like the fact that I am experiencing the free society that I once didn't believe is around us. Life seems good again.
Rachael Leigh
06-08-2018, 08:34 AM
I think what started for me as dressing at home, taking pictures and such I just decided I didn’t want to be that person who
was afraid to just be myself and to not hide behind the door, but to be happy with who I am. Yes I consider myself trans
non binary but besides that, what is the issue with going out dressing as you please. I’ve been going out now for about 2
years, off and on and as I said in one of my picture threads passing for me is what I do on the highway. I’ve come to find out there are lots of good people out there and they just go about their business and most times I’m treated like anyone else and that’s refreshing.
Mandy T
06-08-2018, 08:52 AM
This is just me. I have been dressing for years and never ventured outside my house. Just this year I started stepping out in the public. My wife has been the one I lean on to tell me the truth about weather I would pass or not. I don't want to go out and be made so to speak. I call it my "Alter Ego". Mandy is project that allows me to find happiness. I am never mad or sad or upset when I am Mandy. Mandy has a great life. LOL
As I improve my craft Mandy becomes more and more passable. The end goal is for Mandy to exist in the world with none the wiser.
Add to that it is a total rush to go out and inter act with the public. Next weekend the wife and I are going out on a weekend getaway. A girls weekend. Mandy will be all I have for the whole weekend. This is a huge test for Mandy.
Mandy
Beverley Sims
06-08-2018, 09:17 AM
I like mixing with other women.
DIANEF
06-08-2018, 09:22 AM
There's a big wide world out there, I don't want to be confined within four walls. It took me a long time to step out of the door, I wish I had done it so much earlier.
DaisyLawrence
06-08-2018, 09:29 AM
Presenting feminine is who I am so I have to go out like it or I would be stuck indoors for ever! As Diane said, there's a big wide world out there, so enjoy it while you can :)
TheHiddenMe
06-08-2018, 09:43 AM
Reading your stories though made me wonder: does it make you feel good to be acknowledged when out and about? I went back to my own experiences and realised that women as a rule don't compliment others easily. I have never stopped someone in the street to compliment her on putting on a good look. I don't think I would do it with a CDer, I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be like everyone else 😉. Or does it make you uncomfortable to get attention? Bear in mind that attention comes both positive and negative and all of us flip a coin, not just CDers.
I've gotten a few compliments when out, and yes it feels good.
Before I started going out on a regular basis, I had to buy my girl clothes while in drab, and for the most part, without trying them on. Part of getting out dressed was to be able to buy clothes dressed, both to make sure they fit, and looked good on me, but also because I've wanted to try on dresses for 50+ years.
Once I got out, I found several GG's who were supportive, and would give me feedback on how I looked (my wife and I are pretty much DADT). So getting out dressed and finding support was a big unexpected bonus.
NancySue
06-08-2018, 09:43 AM
The fun, need and challenges. I’m always dressed underneath. There are days where it’s fine, but occasionally, when I add things, the desire to go out increases. Most women around here don’t wear makeup (sad), so I have to tone it down, which is not a problem. Heels and hose are a rarity, too...another 😕, but I can’t seem to help it, I wear hose...so there. Lol
Sometimes Steffi
06-08-2018, 10:59 AM
Thank you Steffi for creating this thread, you are right, my question was limited to specific kind of CDers as it served a particular purpose. Reading your stories though made me wonder: does it make you feel good to be acknowledged when out and about? I went back to my own experiences and realised that women as a rule don't compliment others easily. I have never stopped someone in the street to compliment her on putting on a good look. I don't think I would do it with a CDer, I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be like everyone else . Or does it make you uncomfortable to get attention? Bear in mind that attention comes both positive and negative and all of us flip a coin, not just CDers.
Cathreen
I assumed that you had a purpose in mind, but I started this thread to turn your question on its head. While some of us girls won't go out for one reason or another, many of us love to go out. And some even go out with their wives as two girls. Not me, because my wife barely acknowledges my CDing.
I love being acknowledged when out. I've had a lot of wonderful comments from GGs while out, and some long conversations about the "why" question. I also got hit on by a guy in a gay bar. I don't think he knew the secret. That's what I call "beer goggles"; any girl looks attractive after enough beer. I'm straight, and this kind of freaked me out. I guess that girls learn how to say "No" at a young age. This was the first time I ever had to say "No".
Since I know how hard I have to work to "look pretty", I admire girls who also work hard. I give GGs compliments many times when they've taken the time to look good, whether it be makeup or clothes. My rule about that is to complement their choices in clothing, not their bodies. Like, "I love that necklace" or "That perfume is wonderful". I always get a positive, if somewhat embarrassed response to my complements. Many times, I got told where they bought it. It's too bad if GGs don't support each other with compliments.
I hope some of this helps. It took me a long time to get from thinking that I was perverted to thinking I was within the range of normal, and that I was allowed to be cute, pretty, attractive or just downright hot. Look at my profile pic (not the Bugs Bunny one) and see if you agree. Remember, I love positive affirmations.
When I thought of myself as a pervert, I kept all of my CDing activity very private, and couldn't be open about it with anyone. That may be why you BF didn't say anything about it. It may not have been a problem until your relationship become sufficiently serious.
Joyce Swindell
06-08-2018, 11:08 AM
Early in my crossdressing going outside was a huge adrenalin rush so not only did it feel great but also was an adrenalin high. As time has passed I worry less over what someone might see or think. Going out has gotten easier but also is less of a high/rush. So now I go out because sometimes this side of me has to be out. It's part of who I am. To me sitting at home is like living in a bubble and I am not capable of isolating myself completely except for recovery of a bad day or something. I often focus on my task at hand and you might say that is isolating myself but somehow that seems different....isolation with a purpose I guess. So I make goals. My last was to be more passing. With the outing two months ago (monthly fem meeting) I felt pretty good about my look. Net goal is to do a week as Joyce, weather it be on a cruise or just on vacation. I'm not sure why other than it is something I've never done before.
Life is a journey
docrobbysherry
06-08-2018, 11:19 AM
TS's dress that way all the time. But, us CD's don't. Of course, some CD's wish the could. But, can't for a variety of reasons.
But, then there's us CD, CD's! (Closet Dressing, Cross Dressers.) We could go out dressed everyday if we wished to. But, we don't! Why not? I can't speak for others, just me.
I feel dressing up for mundane, daily tasks and venues populated by vanillas to be stressful and pointless for a number of reasons!
For every smile or nice word spoken, I need to put up with countless guffaws, snarky, disapproving looks, and disparaging remarks.:Angry3:
Then, if out shopping or having lunch, etc. The fact that I am a distraction wherever I go, negative or positive, takes away from the purpose I'm out.:sad:
I can't dress the way I like. Pretty, sexy, stylish. I have to dress to blend!:doh:
It takes me an hour to present as a female. Takes me 5 minutes in drab!:heehee:
sara66
06-08-2018, 11:52 AM
We put a lot of work in looking good. It would be a shame if we didn't get out once in awhile, The first few times it is quite a rush. I gets easier each time I get out. Most people don't notice or don't care.
Sara
kimdl93
06-08-2018, 11:57 AM
I have gone out a lot in the not so distant past. I never really thought I could pass, let alone blend in, so my very first forays were made without much effort at "concealing" my more masculine features....(not that one!)
I found that I enjoyed just being out in the real world and engaging people. I've said it before and I'll risk repeating myself: Getting all dressed up and sitting by myself at home came to feel like confinement. I wanted to do the things I enjoyed....dining, shopping, occasionally having a drink and listening to music, site seeing and traveling as myself.... Getting out felt like, and feels like "freedom".
carhill2mn
06-08-2018, 12:32 PM
Thank you Steffi for creating this thread, you are right, my question was limited to specific kind of CDers as it served a particular purpose. Reading your stories though made me wonder: does it make you feel good to be acknowledged when out and about? I went back to my own experiences and realised that women as a rule don't compliment others easily. I have never stopped someone in the street to compliment her on putting on a good look. I don't think I would do it with a CDer, I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be like everyone else 😉. Or does it make you uncomfortable to get attention? Bear in mind that attention comes both positive and negative and all of us flip a coin, not just CDers.
I go out en femme several times a week to do a variety of things. I enjoy being treated as a woman. I also enjoy receiving compliments, usually from women. I think that I look much better as a woman and can not remember ever receiving a compliment as a man! No one ever compliments a man on his looks, especially an older man!
dana digs sweaters
06-08-2018, 12:51 PM
"What is the attraction of going out dressed?"
Some simple times in my 20s and 30s to show some of the salesgals what I looked like in person all dolled up.
To show them the difference between a crossdresser (me) and a transvestite.
Liking the responses I got from them.
Pass as a woman? No, not at all.
Just enjoying the stores during the day when less people are around. Matinee movies too.
To experience walking in heels more then just inside the house.
Feeling the breeze that would flow up my skirt/dress that gave a gentle cooling effect down there that only women would also know.
Watching my ample false breast jutting out proudly in front and slightly bouncing as I walked was another joy to behold.
The heaviness of wearing false eyelashes along with the slickness of lipstick on my lips was also a treat to me.
All of this is the attraction to be out as the crossdresser that I am
292641
Stephanie47
06-08-2018, 01:08 PM
My comment on Cathreen's thread got bounced. I ask her whether or not my comment passed muster. No, but, I'm glad this thread was started. There are degrees of venturing forth into the world. Does one go to venues and interact with other humans? Or does one still try to maintain secrecy while leaving the confines of the abode. Only on Halloweens have I gone out with the intent of soliciting responses or at least knowing there was the strong possibility of interaction. It was buying doughnuts at a Winchell's Donut House and buying soda at Safeway. A nice comment from a female cashier at Winchell's. Nothing said either way from a female cashier at Safeway, although there was a burst of laughter from a young half drunk male. But it was Halloween, and, my inner self was not riled.
Over the years I have taken drives fully en femme which did include nail polish and full facial makeup. I loved the feel of the breeze caressing my legs and playing with the skirt of my dress and slip. Other times it was sans makeup and nail polish. I viewed those as too much of a bother applying and removing. Still I make reasons to get out of my car. It may be to drop off a book and the night return slot at a library. Or grab a free newspaper. Mail a letter. Buy a can of soda outside a Safeway. Or just take a long stroll in the evening. It has been my intent to avoid any interact because the purpose of my outings is to enjoy the serenity wearing and appearing as much as a woman as I can achieve, and, not be engage in any interactions. As I chicken as many would venture to suggest? I do not believe so. If wearing women's clothing is strictly a private affair with no objective to disturb tranquility, then I do not believe I am chicken.
Yes, I have toyed with the idea I may be involved in an accident, even on those residential side streets, but, that is a risk. I could also have a coronary and end up in an ER. But, that is an acceptable risk. Of course, I could have that coronary at home when alone and pass away fully en femme. That's an acceptable risk. I do not feel I would gain any inner feeling of tranquility engaging sales clerk fully en femme on an ordinary Saturday night.
I have no idea why I do what I do. I know what wearing women's clothing makes me feel. It may be a self imposed limitation, but, I do not feel anything is lacking. So, today while my wife is at work until 4 PM I am fully en femme doing domestic chores; washing my dainty laundry and making macaroni salad for tonight's dinner. I hope I don't stroke out and die on the kitchen floor before she comes home.
I haven't gone beyond my yard dressed, but lots of people have seen me dressed in my house and yard so I felt like I shouldn't have replied to Cathleen's thread. If there was no issues between gender and clothes, I would wear skirts most of the time. They are comfortable and I like how they look and move. So the attraction for me to wear them out is just to wear what I like. I spent most of my life denying this part of me, and now that I have accepted myself it is freeing to go out and show the world this is me. But at the same time I don't want any attention :)
t-girlxsophie
06-08-2018, 08:46 PM
I go out to enjoy my Sophie time,sometimes on my own but generally with my 2 best friends.I don't pass but on the whole I get by without any difficulties.Its just so much fun getting a chance to enjoy this major part of me
Jodie_Lynn
06-08-2018, 08:49 PM
I go out to validate me.
I enjoy interacting with the muggles and spreading knowledge about our culture.
Plus, I really like showing the world what Jodie looks like!
Becky Blue
06-08-2018, 08:55 PM
A very good question and I too would like to have contributed to the other thread but couldn't. I go out mostly because I love it. I love the feeling of being seen as a woman. I love the thrill and excitement of that first moment when I step out. I love the preparation, putting on makeup, trying on clothes, accessorising. I love going out with a bunch of girls the camaraderie the feeling of belonging. I love going out to blend and just be another woman out there.... I could go on
Karmen
06-08-2018, 10:40 PM
I don't bother to fully dress at home, but I do when going out. It's such a good feeling walking around all dressed, make up, earrings, wig. Because I don't pass and I'm still in the closet, I usually go out at night. I don't want to push my luck too much.
ReneeTX
06-18-2018, 04:03 PM
I dress to enjoy, not really to impress. As much as I know the ladies at Lane Bryant know my true gender, I love being addressed as Ma'am and being able to experience the dressing room.
On a recent trip to New Orleans, I went farther than I ever have before. I spent two days doing not a single thing in male mode. I went shopping, went to the movies, out to dinner, and also spent the day at the WWII museum. That museum is a MUST, by the way...simply amazing. At the end of the second day, it was time for me to check in to my hotel, because the next day would start a 3 day IT conference. I parked my truck on Canal, adjusted my forms, fed the meter, and walked to the desk to check-in. The young lady looked at my license, then at me, then my license...and smiled, "if it wasn't for the HAIR". I was so elated, I could barely contain myself. I thanked her so much for the flattery.
I used to try to go to gay bars to watch the drag shows, just so I could go somewhere I thought I "belonged". But, I found that I really don't belong there. I'm straight, and 100% devoted to my wife. I don't judge or look down on those establishments, I just don't feel comfortable. I like what Elizabeth said about wanting to be perceived as a woman, at least to the best of her abilities. That's me. Every once in awhile it takes me a few minutes to gather my nerves and get out of the truck. But, for the most part if I'm far enough away from home, I just get out and have fun. I do worry about confrontations sometimes, mainly because I don't have anyone I can enjoy this with, so I'm always alone. But, I do have a License to Carry, and almost always have a "purse pistol" with me (drinking is the exception, then it's illegal). So, I do have some comfort there. Sure, I may be forced out of the closet when I explain my attire to the Grand Jury, but at least I'll be alive to do it. :D
Sorry...I'm rambling. :) Happy Father's Day to everyone who is one!
Tamsin Secret
06-18-2018, 04:48 PM
.
Was a heck of an experience, and wouldn't have traded it for the world. Definitely needed it during that part of my life. These days? Not so much. I came, I saw, I went. :)
Apart from the 'these days not so much' i think I could have that on my gravestone!:gn:
JeanTG
06-18-2018, 07:30 PM
Just me being me.
Mary Lawrence
06-18-2018, 09:43 PM
A very good question and I too would like to have contributed to the other thread but couldn't. I go out mostly because I love it. I love the feeling of being seen as a woman. I love the thrill and excitement of that first moment when I step out. I love the preparation, putting on makeup, trying on clothes, accessorising. I love going out with a bunch of girls the camaraderie the feeling of belonging. I love going out to blend and just be another woman out there.... I could go onBecky, you have described my feelings almost perfectly! I would only add that the desire to dress and go out is always tinged with a worry that I will be outed and embarrassed publicly. Knock on wood, but it has not happened yet. Also, I envy your apparent access to female camaraderie. That's something I would love to have. I had a great weekend in public in an art gallery, grocery shopping, Home Depot and a movie, but alone. I'd dearly like to share a feminine clothes shopping trip with a gg or two.
Aunt Kelly
06-18-2018, 10:33 PM
I used to try to go to gay bars to watch the drag shows, just so I could go somewhere I thought I "belonged". But, I found that I really don't belong there. I'm straight, and 100% devoted to my wife. I don't judge or look down on those establishments, I just don't feel comfortable.
That's my experience as well, Renee. It's not that we're made to feel unwelcome, but a crossdresser in a gay bar will be often be conspicuously ignored. Now, that's not to say that their are not establishments and occasions where we are conspicuously welcomed. The Houston girls will be hitting a few this weekend. Just sayin'. :)
faltenrock
06-19-2018, 02:32 AM
Dressing up as a woman is part of me and part of my complex personality. Going out is something I need to do. I like the attention, I like the feel of my dress touching my legs, I like watching myself in the window reflexion. I also like to interact with people, especially when dressing won't be the subject of any conversation.
I love to shop as a female for my clothes and to interact with the SA people.
Dressing and going out is a thearpy for me and healing my inner balance.
Do I pass, most of the times I think I do, leaving perhaps sometimes the question whether I'm a man or a woman.
Do I care about passing? No very much, not enough to worry about it.
I live my life, when going out I respect my wife's wish that I do it far away from home to not get recognized.
Presenting as female gives me the feeling that I can be beautiful and pretty, as a man I'm not.
I like compliments a lot and I do get them from women, men and couples, it built up my confidence and self esteem.
That's my experience as well, Renee. It's not that we're made to feel unwelcome, but a crossdresser in a gay bar will be often be conspicuously ignored. Now, that's not to say that their are not establishments and occasions where we are conspicuously welcomed. The Houston girls will be hitting a few this weekend. Just sayin'. :)
I can much relate to this statement. I also used to go to gay bars because I felt, the drag queens and other CD are just like me. I realized that I have my own little femme world and don't need to go to those places.
Most times I go to any place where any women would go, bars, cafes, restaurants, the movies, whatever.
sherri
06-19-2018, 11:56 AM
I don't go out as much as I used to, but from the get-go it was just instantly, instinctively important to me to go out. And I wasn't satisfied with being out of the house, nor was I all that interested in passing. I actually kinda wanted people to know i was something in between guy and girl, and I wanted to interact with people that way, to experience the usual and unusual as Sherri. Over the years I've experienced just about every variation of friendly, unfriendly, tolerant and intolerant, accepting and not, welcomed and ignored, and I used to be pretty wrapped up in all that, fretted about it waaayyy too much. Now I don't really give a rip as long as people aren't hateful, I don't have many expectations, I just savor the tremendous stimulation and fulfillment of venturing out and being the quixotic gender mashup I am. ;-)
BLUE ORCHID
06-19-2018, 01:13 PM
Hi Steffi :hugs:,
~~~~~ SEE LINE #2 IN MY SIGNATURE ! >ORCHID...:daydreaming:...
Jenny22
06-19-2018, 03:23 PM
The attraction for me is wanting to be true to my inner girl by letting her go out. It's like needing a 'fix.' I've never used illegal drugs, but I imagine going out would be like having to take heavier drug doses to get your fix. Its just something a girl has to do, go out, to get her fix for needing more. Make sense?
windycissy
06-19-2018, 04:44 PM
I love to go places as a woman because it’s so much fun! For years I was deeply closeted, until my living situation finally gave me the opportunity. When I first ventured into the real world, there were plenty of embarrassing moments, until gradually through trial and error I figured out how to dress and present myself more femininely (losing a ton of weight really helped) tone down my makeup, find a really attractive wig, etc etc. Now when I walk out the door I feel confident, and that really helps more than anything. So why do I do it? Like I said, it’s fun! Going shopping for dresses and stuff is a wonderful experience, meeting other like minded individuals for drinks, dinner, sports etc is a total blast, and just experiencing what it’s like to wear a skirt on a windy day is part of the fascination for me.
candice.aihara
06-19-2018, 09:11 PM
I do so because I receive complements (not all the time of course), and some people have done a double-take when they spot me. It's a secret thrill.
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