Dealing with the man in you !

[Teresa]

I've had days now of going out dressed it really does feel so good but the man in me caught me out a couple of times the other day. I was just coming out of the supermarket fully dressed and walking across the car park was a young woman possibly early mid twenties with an older lady . She had short red shorts on a neat TShirt and her long blond hair loosely crinkled , she took my eye and I found I was tracking her across the car park, luckliy I had sun glasses on so my eye movement wasn't too noticable . Later that day I slipped on my short shorts and flat canvas shoes to take the dog for a walk , I met a lady walking her dog who became nervous about her dog and bent to put it on a lead , her TShirt dropped enough to reveal a very nicely proportioned bust , ( peaches and cream came to mind !!) Again I had sunglasses on so she wouldn't have noticed my attention evenso we chatted for a few minutes about our dogs .

Twice in one day did the man in me show an interest in attractive women , I was trying to tell myself I'm dressed like a woman and shouldn't feel like this , it is confusing at times what goes on inside our heads .

[Paula DAngelo]

Twice in one day did the man in me show an interest in attractive women , I was trying to tell myself I'm dressed like a woman and shouldn't feel like this , it is confusing at times what goes on inside our heads .

Teresa,

This doesn't necessarily mean that the man is you is coming out. Remember there are women who like men, men who like men, women who like women, men who like women, and even men and women that like both. Your feelings aren't wrong, who you find attractive has nothing to do with your gender, it's just one of those things that is. I say if you see someone that you consider attractive whether it's a man or a woman feel free to enjoy what you are seeing.

[Tracii G]

Exactly Paula !!

[Gillian Gigs]

Human kind has always seemed to have a mixture of contradictions, so why wouldn't CD'ers be any different. I have looked at some women and thought WOW would I ever like to be dressed like that. Another time I go WOW what a beautiful woman, as in a me Tarzan, you Jane thought mode. All this proves is that you are not dead yet...LOL.

[docrobbysherry]

You're behind the times, Teresa! Trans online that do that call themselves, "transbians".:brolleyes:

No, I can't tell u exactly what it means-----:heehee:

[Piora]

Teresa, sometimes when I see an attractive woman, nicely dressed, I can't tell the difference about whether the male part of me is interested in her figure, or the female part of me is envious of her curves. I think as CDs we have a vastly different perspective when looking at attractive women.

[biancabellelover]

I consider myself to be what Eddie Izzard calls a “male lesbian”.

Since I started dressing I find I still check out women like I did before, but now with the extra dimension of fashion, clothing, and hairstyle.


Michelle.

[Teresa]

Michelle,
I was a little concerned over using that as so many members get heated over using it , to some it's a nonexistent term . I admit it's exactly how I feel and my gender counsellor didn't have a problem with it . I know on both occasions I wasn't paying attention ito the clothes and that's an interseting point of view Piora mentions , not knowing what strings are being pulled inside your head !

Sherry ,
Do I worry about being behind the times but I have to admit " Tranbians " is a new one on me ! Do I need to wear heavy walking boots to deal with it ?

Gillian ,
Obviously I'm alive and kicking !

Paula,
Thanks for that , I must admit it brought to mind the whole story line of the film, " Some like it hot " . I still find the closing sequence funny when Jack Lemmon declares he's a man and the older guy replies , " Well no one's perfect !" as they go off in the motor boat .

The thought just crossed my mind that perhaps someone could have been tracking me across the car park with my shopping trolley , I wonder in those circumstances what they were thinking ?

[DaisyLawrence]

Twice in one day did the man in me show an interest in attractive women , I was trying to tell myself I'm dressed like a woman and shouldn't feel like this , it is confusing at times what goes on inside our heads .

And yet after all your experiences you still struggle to realise that sexuality and gender identity are not interconnected?

[Bobbi46]

Teresa, Don't bash yourself over this one, we are all human at the end of the day. Sexuality and desire for another person of the oposite sex or the same sex are all natural reactions and normal thoughts, "ooh I fancy her like mad" or thoughts like that.
At times I feel the same, just yesterday whilst having coffee in town, sat outside my favourite brassere not to be confused with a brassiere! I found on a couple of occasions I was looking at women and thinking "I would not throw you out on a rainy night!".
As I say we are all human with natural urges.

[Rachelakld]

I have the same issues, never quite sure if I want her body shape, her body, or both.

[Teresa]

Daisy,
Maybe it was just hormonal that day but it just hit me between the eyes when I didn't expect it .

Bobbi,
I guess I found it confusing because we dress to deal with the female side of us and I felt very comfortable that day as I do most days and then the hidden man surfaces to tell me not to forget him !!

Rachel ,
I guess we should be grateful that the brain still functions OK it's a little mixed up but it still has a difficult job to do , possibly age isn't helping but let's not go there !!

[alwayshave]

Teresa, Beautiful women are beautiful women and everyone looks. I was with a female friend when this women walks buy who is built like a brick outhouse. She stares at her. The friend looks at me and says "did you see that, I'm not gay, but I'd f' her."

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Hi T,

Is it your objective to eliminate masculinity within yourself? Are you saying that you're heading for full transition? I may not be fully up to speed with your progress, not sure.

For me, as an occasional crossdresser, I can't conceive of becoming unaware or unappreciative of female beauty- I was at a wedding yesterday full of hot Parisian millennials of both sexes, it was a visual smorgasbord.

[DIANEF]

Although I strive to look as much like a woman as I can I still am a male under all the make up and female clothes, and I do find women attractive. As has been said it is a mixture of checking out what they wear and how they look, and admiring the beauty of the female form.

[RainbowDash]

I think its a natural reaction for men to look at women and find them sexy, hot, etc. I do this a lot and then 2 things happen.... First I will look at them through the eyes of a man and think to myself how great she looks. Second, I will visualize myself as a woman wearing the same outfit. Nothing wrong at all with the way u felt, we're men and we're gonna have male feelings, unless of course u get treatments and become a woman.

[Stephanie47]

You can stick any moniker on it that you want. A abide by something a counselor threw out to me several years ago. She believes that all men and women have some genetics of the opposite sex. In some it is stronger than others. I figure you're just acting as part of your male genetic component. What going to happen with that thing between your legs if a woman comes onto you because she appreciates you as you current are? You may get a rise out of the situation, if you know what I mean!

[GracieRose]

I have always looked at women with 2 things in mind.
I enjoy looking at attractive women.
I also evaluate their clothing and think about if I would like to be wearing their outfit (or parts of it):daydreaming: or wouldn't be caught dead wearing it :eek:
The thoughts are the same whether I'm en femme, or in my male disguise.

[Jean 103]

Teresa,

Gender and sexual preference are two different things.

Don’t try and put yourself in a box. How you feel is how you feel. Be yourself, it is that simple.

[Teresa]

Jean,
Many thanks , I gave a reply to Daisy with a similar comment , it just caught me out when I least expected it .

[kimdl93]

Went out on 42nd street
That's where the elite all retreat to greet
You can see them coming from everywhere
Every kind of man and woman you will find there

There are men who love women who love men
There are women who love women every now and then
There are men who love men because they can't pretend
They are men who love women who love men

There are those who make love for pay
And there are those who make love anyway
And over in the bar with a bottle of scotch
There are those who would rather just watch

All the men who love women who love men
And the women who love women every now and then
There are men who love men because they can't pretend
They are men who love women who love men

There are those who make love to machines
That don't talk back and are easy to clean
And there are those who will tell you out loud
That they can only make love in a crowd

A crowd of men who love women who love men
And women who love women every now and then
There are men who love men because they can't pretend
They are men who love women who love men





In the pursuit of true love's joy
Boys will be girls and girls will be boys
But sometimes it's hard to know what to do
When you don't know who you're talking to

'cause there are men who love women who love men
There are women who love women every now and then
There are men who love men because they can't pretend
They are men who love women who love men

I still miss Steve Goodman!

[Bobbi46]

Teresa, I hope the " hidden man" was well tucked when you looked at that woman!LOL
But it all proves that what we are is what we are.

kimdL A lovely poem sums up just about everything.

[Becky Blue]

Straight CIS woman will look and appreciate an attractive well dressed woman, its not sexual desire though... I look at woman and see how they wear their clothes, how they carry themselves, how they accessorise.

[Beverley Sims]

The real me ,no going back.

That may be true, but the mindset is still a powerful thing to battle with.

Teresa, you should know, just go with the flow.

I still look at striking women in a wantonly way when dressed.

I just forget for a moment then continue on.

[Robertacd]

I was trying to tell myself I'm dressed like a woman and shouldn't feel like this , it is confusing at times what goes on inside our heads .

Why not?

I have always been attracted to women and never been attracted to men when I am dressed or not. As I have said many times I am the same person in drag or drab, my thoughts, needs, and desires do not change because I am wearing a dress.

Lesbians actually are women and they are fine feeling that way, so it's okay for you too.

[IleneD]

It is SO annoying to get a big woody while wearing a tight skirt, and no tuck! How awkward.

[Teresa]

Ilene,

That's what good knicker elastic was designed for , I'm not being drawn on any further comment but I get the picture !

[Sarah Doepner]

Teresa,

I think I might understand your discomfort. We spend so much time attempting to work on the outward appearance as we do our best to erase all signs of our masculinity. When we are satisfied with the result and our minds are set in female mode we are ready to face the world. But then our basic biology hasn't been convinced and we respond in ways that we see as a failure. But to feel that somehow we aren't good enough to overcome sexuality or open appreciation of the human form is probably a false goal. Accept the attraction, watch for it in the future but don't use it to classify your self or measure your progress in finding the real you.

You have been so much more successful than so many others and just being surprised that you are fully human is just one more learning experience to enjoy. Don't let those moments put you off and focus on all the positive things you've encountered, or maybe that person who is checking you out as you cross the parking lot.

[Jenny22]

Ilene, Just be thankful you can. LOL

[Rachael Leigh]

My eyes mostly go to what the ladies are wearing, when I see the real pretty ones I always think why could that not be me.
A born girl to be able to look so gorgeous.

[Pat]

Teresa - in reference to a similar episode, my therapist just said, "So you like women. You're not the first woman to do that you know. Don't worry about it."

[CONSUELO]

Don't worry or over analyze your feelings Teresa. Although you pass beautifully as a woman you still have the male chromosomes and as you have said before in other posts you are not interested in men, so it has to be women.

Jean is correct in what she says. Don't worry about it, just keep your eye out for a pretty woman who likes Teresa.

[Cheryl T]

In that situation my attention is due to her outfit or the way she carries herself. More studious than anything else.
The man inside is sleeping...

[sarah_hillcrest]

OK, total honesty here, I can't speak for GGs, but as a guy I will occasionally check out another guy who really stands out in the exact way you are describing. Not like, oh dang he is hot, but more out of appreciation for human beauty. I'm sure many women do this with each other. Also since embracing CD I've really started checking out women on multiple levels.

[Sissy Sandy]

I like to dress
I also like women
but I have never been out dressed
if i saw an attractive women and i was id still look

[jacques]

hello Teresa,
just because we wear women's clothes some of the time does not mean that have to be attracted to men!
luv J

[Nikki A.]

Sometimes old habits just too ingrained to change quickly. No harm no foul

[Patience]

En femme, I identify as a lesbian.

Confuses the hell out of everybody.

[Ronnie38]

As a bisexual I have had these moments as well. I am not a public cder but sometimes, and it's rare when it happens, I will see a guy who I think is hot and my mind will wander.... Sometimes I see cute girls and wander in the same way. When at home, dressed or not, I also see my wife in the same way. Sexuality is human nature. No matter which gender you identify with or which gender you are attracted to, you will always be attracted. Go with it. You've come to terms with Teresa, now you need to come to terms with human nature.

[Felicia M]

O I definitely check out women to this very day and when I am in Felicia mode I have come to realize I am a lipstick lesbian!! LOL

[Alice B]

I have to be 100% honest. In those situations it is the male in me that reacts