The Feminization of America...

[Rhonda Jean]

... and probably elsewhere. This is purely from random observation. I lived through and participated in the similar feminization of fashion in the '70's with long hair, platform heels, and boys and girls clothes being practically interchangeable for a period of years. Then there was the glam rock era of the '80's. Maybe it's my age or my perspective, but this seems different, more widespread, and more permanent and still trending toward increasing feminization. It's probably pointless to speculate on the cause. The internet, the media, the growing acceptance and awareness of gay and divergent lifestyles... who knows. It'd be a long list. We all see it play out, and not necessarily just among our out and visible sisters. I'm equally fascinated by the feminine things that work their way into the male side. Things that not long ago were hyper feminine that now hardly get a mention. Seems like especially in the last 10 years the change has been pretty rapid and is not slowing down, like...

Earrings. Young boys not only allowed to get their ears pierced, but encouraged and sometimes even parents having their ears pierced before they're old enough to have an opinion. It seems to be a statement either by the parents or the child, but I'm not sure what the statement is, but I'm sure I could be misreading it. Earrings are as common among the otherwise hyper masculine as they are among the feminine.

Nail polish. I occasionally see it on otherwise masculine guys. Certainly this must be a nod to some feminine leaning. I can't imagine what it would be otherwise. I sometimes see it on TV and sometimes in public. Men as well as young boys.

Long hair. There's long hair that can be masculine, and there's long hair that's unmistakably feminine. This one just stuns me. Especially (but not only) in the black community, I see so many examples of VERY feminine hairstyles that just hardly get a notice on so many males. Football players with braids down to their waist. Men in all walks of life with braids, buns, straightened, or curled. Back in my long hair days I had a formal updo 3 times, and felt like that was the pinnacle of femininity even as someone who frequently wore feminine styles in male mode. Maybe the guys who now wear these "manbuns" pass them off as masculine by putting the "man" prefix in the description, but I'm telling you I see guys with full blown updos. Never ceases to amaze me.

Guys in makeup. Go to a lot of makeup counters these days and there'll be a male SA in makeup. Occasionally a waiter or a clerk. YouTube is littered with male makeup tutorials, particularly with young boys who are admired for their makeup skills as if it's some rare talent like being a musical prodigy. I guess every major cosmetics brand has a male spokesperson now.

Males modeling womenswear. Certainly there is no shortage of women to model womenswear if the purpose is simply to model the clothes. This can only be to showcase the fact that womenswear can be worn by feminine men, and they can look damn hot doing it.

Feminine men's clothes. I typically wear women't shorts. Last year I hit a Dillard's sale and bought a couple pair of men's shorts that are as short as any of the women's shorts I have. One pair is pink. These were straight off the men's rack, but more feminine than some of my women's shorts. Just about a week ago I bought a pair of Abercrombie men's "super skinny" jeans that are literally the tightest jeans I own. It's hard for me to imagine a guy wearing these as a guy.

Men removing body hair. "Nair for men", men's body shavers... so many examples of mainstream hair removal. It absolutely doesn't even raise an eyebrow. It's more surprising these days to see a guy who has body hair.

I could go on, but that probably hits the high points. This up and coming generation is luckier than they realize, and I'm happy for them. Happy for the guys who bravely express femininity in the most masculine of environments. The college football players with their hair in waist-length braids, their ears pierced and their brows done. So happy for the guys on the other end of the spectrum who get a job at Ulta and get up every morning and do full on stunning makeup. Not just for their work day, but for living their ordinary lives. Makes me happy that they can do that! I'm happy for the boys and trans girls like us whose moms are taking them to shop for prom dresses. It's just an awesome time to grow up, and, yes, I know it's far from universal acceptance, but it's mind-blowingly evolutionary to be at this point.

I think we tend to dwell on the negative and the lack of acceptance and the fear of discovery and reprisal. I know I do in my own life. It's just so awesome to know that there's a segment of society that's evolving at a rapid pace. It'll eventually carry over to other elements of society. Probably as the older generation dies off. I could not have seen us being at this point even 15 years ago. It's very exciting to think of where we might be 10 or 15 years from now!

[Nikki A.]

While the times are changing, there is still a ways to go. But I have to admit, I never thought I'd find the acceptance that I do when I do go out.

[redtea]

It's probably a bad thing based on the vast amount of fatherless sons who grow up around women and girls and aren't able to bond with a father figure and blossom into manhood properly.

I know thats the case with me.

[Beverley Sims]

Mmmm!

Looking at some of these "men" they have beards , tattoos, sometimes look scruffy, I think they are searching for an identity that separates them from the rest of civilization.

I can not visualise any of them in a nice pretty frock. :-)

I agree, in twenty years the girls might be growing beards and lifting weights.

Girls are becoming more dominant......

Do you also believe in climate change?

[curvious]

Remember in the last 5 years of the 80's decade, men were wearing bike style shorts and racerback tanks everywhere. The start of Grunge Rock and the Portland/Seattle scene in 89ish closed out an incredible decade. Boots, baggie jeans, over-sized shirts and jackets. Couldn't tell men from women as women went from vixen looks to lumberjack overnight. From there, Jordan demanded long baggie gangsta basketball shorts, which all the teams and kids emulated. Baggie pants dropped to the thighs became de rigueur for thug wannabes and hoodrats.
The entire 90's generation was raised that it was a sign of weakness for a man to show any leg above the knee, although women had to show leg up to their ass cheeks. Our short shorts and Y-back String bodybuilder tanks were acquiesced by women. In Fact bodybuilding and the built look became replaced with a scrawny rock climbing build for a lot of guys - Tied in with the grunge look. I can understand why guys didn't want skinny knobby-kneed white legs showing up to mid-thigh. Thankfully we are finally out of cargo shorts era and at least 7 inch shorts are accepted everywhere. I am trying to get back to my 5" Shorts. Some days when I wear them to the gym, I always get sick looks from guys. I can live with that. I think many want to go that route, but unlike women, deep down they are afraid what others will think. I've Got to hand it to women, they take a style add attitude and run with it!

[Queen Bridget]

The 80's are still the most free men were as far as fashion goes. I still remember seeing guys walking around with eye makeup on. Never see that these days.

It comes and goes in waves.

[Rayleen]

Rhonda Jean,

Very interesting reading on your post, Very true that time has change in younger boys in feminising,

Thanks for posting.

Rayleen.

[Teresa]

Rhonda,
Not just the US but much of the Western World , most things have become equal ( OK wages do vary ) we have far more single parent famillies , women can earn more than men , they do the same jobs ( many just as well if not better ) . Many men don't do physical work anymore so they don't carry the same body bulk, women are becomming bigger , it was unheard off at one time to see size 8 women's shoes , I've spoken to many who now take that size many of them younger females . I also think most clothes worn now on a daily basis are less feminine . I guess we're looking at a natural progression , but it's far from the story in some parts of the World , females are still very much second class citizens with very few rites.

I would say that there more pockets resisting this in the US then there are in the UK , I had to smile at my mum's comments about the younger generation, she said, " men aren't men anymore !" That was before I told her about my CDing , I don't know what she thinks now !

[Gillian Gigs]

I'm of the opinion that in having true equality between the sexes you would see elements of gender blending happen. You might see everything in the spectrum from very masculine to very feminine men, and you would see the same within women, which seems to be happening. In our western culture we see women dress in many various styles as they move closer to having equality with men, True equality would then lead me to believe that men would then want, or get a similar experience. The fashion industry wants more customers and the male market is a vastly untapped area. But... we must remember that other areas of the world are not like our western culture. Women are still very much repressed, misused and abused. Yet, western culture is what many other cultures seem to be adopting, just look at how much Japan has changed since the end of WW2. They have a lot of gender blending going on there!

[Felicia M]

"In a thousand years, there will be no men and women, just ******s, and that's fine by me."
-Trainspotting

I honestly feel we are in a moment in time when binary gender identity is slowly giving way to much more fluidity. As others have said the there have been massive changes to how people perceive gender in the past 15-20 years in Western and even some Asian cultures.I imagine an even more rapid pace of change is emerging with the younger generations. Bring it on!

[sarah_hillcrest]

I think Felicia is right, ten years ago how many people had heard of a gender spectrum? Would a mainstream TV show featured a crossdressing boy in a respectful way ten years ago?

[Alice B]

I think that what you have said is right on and I also think that the public as a whole has become much more aware and accepting of cross gender expression. We now see it on television and the movies as a major roles and not a minor theme. I have posted and have seen recent posts by members here that their spouses or girlfriends have suddenly changed their stand onour cross dressing and gender expression. My wife is a classic example. From acceptance, but don't let me see it to steps leading to full acceptance. This comes from greater knowledge about us and to greater exposure on the big stage. Many things in life are cylic. There was a time in the past when men wore wigs and make up as a part of daily life. Are we headed that way?

[TolerantCD]

Nice observation. I agree, of course, that it’s a good thing that freedom is increasing in society, and there’s more and more tolerance for what’s basically something people are born with whether they like it or not.

I dream of the day where you can go out into the street in whatever clothes you like without it being even something noticeable or worth mentioning. I hope I live to see that day and take full advantage of it. Our time is coming, hopefully.

[Pat]

Is it really the "Feminization of America" though? I was born in the early 1950's, less than a decade after the end of WWII. I'd argue that my generation grew up in a very strict, regimented society as a side-effect of that war and progressive generations are not "feminizing" but benefiting from America (and the rest of the world -- this is not really a US-only thing) unclenching as it gets further away in time from that very traumatic event. If you read up on Berlin before WWI those days seem more like the current state of our culture. I think this is the "Recovery of America (and the rest of the world.)"

[IleneD]

My take on it all is not so much a feminization. It’s just that there are no rules anymore. No rules. Anything from sublime conventional gentleman to full body mutilation

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Rhonda Jean :hugs:, That was a very interesting read, I find myself somewhat in it,


Hairless body from the eyes down, Shaped brows, well manicured nails & polished, Necklace & Bracelets,

Triple pierced ears, Ladies Jeans, >Orchid ..O:daydreaming:O..

[LilSissyStevie]

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Masculine Women, Feminine Men (1926)

https://youtu.be/iSlfQ49Bq1s

[Crissy 107]

Old norms in society are hard to break but there is no doubt things are changing and obviously for the better. Calling it the feminization of America sounds good to me!
Crissy

[deebra]

Rhonda except for a recent interaction with a SA that was a cd/tg I don't see any males wearing female clothing. Crossdressing is males wearing female clothes. If things are progressing and changing Where Are They????? Not talking about hair or ear rings, I want to see a guy in girl jeans, girl top and breasts, heels, girl shorts. The only one I see is me when I am in a store and look in the mirror.

[Cassandra Lynn]

Not to get to far off topic, but where do you live?
I ask because a lot of your generalizations are very geographically influenced. Larger city centers are usually much more liberal in scope. I thought your comment about men and body hair was especially questionable.
Younger and a lot of middle age guys who are into physical fitness do tend to lead the charge in body hair removal, but in my part of the world (I live near the most populated part of my state), I don't see that many men (non gym rats) going hair free or excessively grooming either.

Same goes for make-up, tho I do occasionally see dudes (non gender variant) in the nail salons.
I've been rather pleased to see a few local guys trending back to shorts that are above the knee, and I have to give myself some credit here, because I have had a handful of women tell me thanx for influencing their boyfriends and husbands in getting away from the 'stupid' (their word) long shorts.

I've been cringing a bit waiting for someone to ask me where to find the shorts I wear, because they can't seem to find them.
I will be honest tho, I did tell one guy who asked, that he as just not looking hard enough.

The sad fact is tho, that if/when the day comes when there is true gender expression freedom we will all be long dead.

Cass

[char GG]

@Deebra
I work part time at a concert venue. There is a CDer stagehand that was dressed exactly like you described (sparkly girl jeans, makeup, breasts, her own long hair). I’ve seen that person before, usually wears a tunic top, leggings, girl purse, & makeup. Can’t dress too fancy because she is doing physical work. Not friendly at all, always seems she has a chip on her shoulder.

There was another CDer who was dressed very nicely attending the concert. CDer wore chunky heels, wig, cute skirt, nice blouse, girl purse, too much makeup (usually the giveaway), & walked like a man. This CDer was very friendly.

On another day, saw a CDer from my husband’s social group shopping at a grocery store. That person is really tall, has a long long blond wig, high platform sandals, and leggings with a tunic top. Stands out big time.

So they are around, but not in great quantities, I guess. It was unusual that I saw two in one night. (Although the stagehand is usually always there). Maybe many blend so well that we don’t notice them.

[Connie.Marie]

Rhonda,

200-300 years ago it was the men who were wearing curly wigs (powdered), high heels & corsets.
Those Kings of France & England and their court back then, they looked downright feminine. Take a look back at their painted portraits.

What ever happened to that fad? Why didn't it continue?
Why did women pick up some of that fashion trend?

Again, I have no answers, just observations.

Hugs, Connie

[Alice Torn]

I do wonder what kind of America it will be, though, if most men go fem. History does repeat itself. The Weimer Republic was very very liberal, with all kinds of sexuality going on, but then came Hitler and Germany changed into a war making machine soon after. I am saying that a nation with few masculine men and fathers, may be fun for a while, but we must not brand mascuinity ,as all undesirable, though. I f there is another world war, and like WW2, will we be able to fight for years, with few masculine men, and Redtea makes good points. So many boys and girls with no fathers or father figures! Reality, is that war will come again.

[NancySue]

Great thread RJ...good points made by all. My two-cents involves geography....where you live...in the world. My take, the far West and East coasts are becoming more and more feminine. When I see clothes styles in New York and LA, I sometimes have a problem determining if the models are m or f. There are many trans M-F models of which some are beautiful. Here in the mid-west...nah. In fact, just the reverse. At concerts, fairs, and everyday shopping...no makeup, oversized clothes, etc. it’s sometimes hard to tell..M or F, which makes going out and blending in a real challenge. 2 cents.

[deebra]

charGG I live in Va. Beach a large tourist city, there are six other fairly large cities adjoining. I do go out shopping to these cities including the malls with a lot of people. Maybe my perfume puts out a scent that sends them away. I usually have something on that is visibly feminine, if I ever see a CD and it seems right I will go over and speak and see if she notices and senses we both might be wearing panties.

[Teresa]

Deebra,
Maybe not the best way to approach another Cder, I wouldn't mind another saying hello but I'm not sure if I'd want to get into a conversation about panties , it's not the subject of any conversations I've ever had at my social meetings in fact we don't often discuss underwear at all apart from the stocking/ tights debate , many in my groups prefer tights ( pantyhose ) I still prefer stockings .

If you're out as a MIAD , some CDers may avoid you , I'm afraid you have to accept some cherish their full dressing appearance and may not want to be seen with a MIAD , there has to be two sides to that situation we can debate the rights and wrongs till the cows come home but it will never be fully resolved . OK personally I like to be seen with reasonably dressed CDers .

We are still a minority the chances of seeing another are slim , before I was really out and going out socially I personally had seen only two , one was in the Enlish Lake District and the other on a cable car in SF . I'm finding now I openly talk to people how many there are in my own home town .