??? Compliments ???

[deebra]

I was in WalMart yesterday waiting in line at the return dept. and when the woman in front of me turned around I couldn't help but notice her low cut top and how much she was showing and a lot of women do that today, would I have been wrong to compliment her on how nice she looked (not her boobs)? In the grocery isle there was a thirty something woman in short shorts with beautiful legs, same compliment; yes or no (not your legs look great)??? If I am out cross dressed in low heel boots, girl jeans that fit me nicely and a girl top and it is clearly girl clothes I am wearing would it be right or wrong for some one to give me the same compliment (their approval I look nice wearing girl clothes)?

[Jaylyn]

I believe all women love a compliment but don't be obnoxious. Look her straight in the eyes when you tell them. " the weather sure is (good,bad, cold, or hot) and I just noticed how nice you look today. YOu should by those words you ought to be able to sense if they like a compliment or not. I give compliments but it's usually in passing and tip my hat or standing in line. They'll let ya know if they want any more said after that.
By the way I wouldn't compliment a younger lady in her teens or twenties any more. They will think your a dirty ole man. ( In a dress )

[Teresa]

Deebra ,
The circumstances could be as important as the compliment , maybe not in a grocery store . I was walking my dog and stopped to talk to a pretty lady walking her dog , we chatted for a few minutes until she noticed my pink nails ( I was in drab ) so I then complimented her on her toes and fingers . I met her again today , she said it was chilly and wished she'd put warmer clothes on but I did compliment her on her nice jacket . She then went onto ask me what I would be wearing later to go shopping so we had a lovely conversation about outfits and where to buy them .

My legs are usually what most GGs comment about often without any prompting or previous conversation .

[char GG]

Welllllll, it depends on how you do it and and age of the woman. Just don’t come across as a creeper.

Usually, I only feel comfortable with men that I know offering compliments.

[sometimes_miss]

Random heterosexual males (crossdressers included) approaching women they don't know and complimenting them on their appearance, are pretty much assumed to have some type of sexually motivated reason involved. Unless, of course, you're a very effeminate gay man, then she will probably think you want to know where to get a copy of what she's wearing.
Still; women are used to creepy men approaching them. Say what you want, and judge her response. You'll know what to do, then.

[Gillian Gigs]

Be very careful, things can get out of control very fast with a lot of miss understanding. I never go beyond a smile and saying hello after eye contact, keeping it simple helps to remove any potential creepy issues.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Deebra :hugs:, You just never know when that kind of thing will backfire on you. >Orchid ..o:daydreaming:o..

[DaisyLawrence]

It all depends who is doing the complimenting. If Tom Cruise says the right thing in the right way I doubt many women would be offended but if my sad fat middle-aged single friend (don't ask) tried his hardest to do it nicely I can assure you he would get the cold shoulder (or arrested). It is possible to be complimentary to a stranger without being creepy but looking and sounding like someone they would be flattered to have impressed helps no end.

[Micki_Finn]

“You look great” or anything to that effect is not a compliment for a stranger. It’s vague and vaguely “pick-up line”ish. If you want to compliment a strange woman in public 1) don’t comment on her body (which you seem to have figured out) and 2) be specific! (“I love your blouse” as opposed to “you look good”, “That skirt is a gorgeous color” as opposed to “you’re so pretty”)

[AllieSF]

Hmmmm ..... Daisy, that must be another difference between the USA and the UK. I was that person you described for most of my older adult life. However, I never had a bad experience, cold shoulder or worse, when complimenting a woman. I have had a few where a longer conversation did not happen, maybe because the other person was lost in their thoughts, not a talkative person, or whatever. Now, how you say it and what you are complimenting needs to be done carefully. With my extroverted personality it is easy to compliment both men and women. Wear a T-shirt with a different logo on it and that starts a conversation that many times lasts a long time, or helps to start the path to become good acquaintances while waiting in the Starbucks line.

I think that the problem with most who have never complimented people very much, is lack of experience (over coming some fears maybe) and lack of proper technique and maybe being a little shy or introverted.

[Jean 103]

I tend not to complement anyone unless I know them or they start it, which happens all the time.

I avoid anything that makes my appear threatening.

Dress with a sence of fashion, hold your head up, smile, be pleasent, approachable. It's what I do and why I have so many friends.

[biancabellelover]

I’ve always had positive responses to when I compliment women.

But the compliment has always been in the form of “Hi, I’d just like to say I love your outfit/hairstyle, etc”. Never in the form of “You look great”, because that can come across in the wrong way.

Recently it’s been more along the lines of “Can I pat your dog”, and then we talk about dogs. Which reminds me: I’d better get off the couch and walk mine.

Ciao. Michelle

[Sometimes Steffi]

“You look great” or anything to that effect is not a compliment for a stranger. It’s vague and vaguely “pick-up line”ish. If you want to compliment a strange woman in public 1) don’t comment on her body (which you seem to have figured out) and 2) be specific! (“I love your blouse” as opposed to “you look good”, “That skirt is a gorgeous color” as opposed to “you’re so pretty”)


So true.

I've complimented women many times, and I've also had a positive reaction. But, like Micki said, I look her in the eyes and complement her on something that's not even vaguely about her body.

Like:

Oh, I love your pendant.

Those shoes are so cute.

That perfume is wonderful.

I love your nail polish.

In all of those cases, she started a short conversation about whee she got it.

[Beverley Sims]

I am never the first to compliment anyone, it can go terribly wrong, on the other hand if I get the compliment I smile and say thank you, any further and it needs a lot of forethought for a suitable reply.

Occasionally the conversation becomes easy and can be quitefriendly and lengthy.

That gives me a lot of satisfaction then.

[AngelaYVR]

You seem to only want to compliment the women wearing "sexy" things, in that case don't.

But as a general topic, if you're standing in a queue with a woman or sitting near her in a cafe and you like her clothes (not her cleavage) then go right ahead! As I was walking home today a guy busking on a guitar called out "hello beautiful" and he said it in such a nice way that it made me smile and say thank you. Just be genuine and people will sense that.

[alwayshave]

I was buying shoes (men's) at a Johnson & Murphy in downtown D.C. The young lady waiting on me was striking and had on a beautiful dress. While settling up at the register, I said "I hope you don't mind me saying, that is a beautiful dress." She said "Thank you, I love it too." I then left. My depend on how you frame the compliment.

[deebra]

Now for the rest of the question that no one answered Or maybe not directly. As a male crossdresser I am dressed in tan ankle boots, tan boot cut jeans and a V neck top made from a soft feminine material, peach or lavender in color, all coordinated and matching very nicely. Is it in good taste for someone to give me a compliment clearly acknowledging I look very nice as a male wearing nicely fitting girl clothes and knowingly risk embarrassing me or validating it is O.K. and they like it? Now the reverse, if this were you would you appreciate being clocked/outed as a male crossdresser wearing girl clothes, maybe even with small boobs? Would you appreciate the compliment or be embarrassed and scared right out of your panties? Really want to hear from you, all opinions appreciated.

Deebra

[Stephanie47]

Ok, I'll bite. Is it good taste for a person to give a MtF crossdressers a compliment? And, is it different than a man in general or a MtF crossdresser in particular to offer a compliment to a woman?

I think a lot women would be extremely apprehensive of any guy offering a compliment, if she does not know the guy. It conveys creepiness. Why is this guy so interested in me? At the grocery aisle? If a woman is at a 'pick up joint' I believe she may be expecting such an encounter. And, encouraging an encounter.

As to a woman encountering a MtF cross dresser and offering a comment? Assuming the comment is not a negative comment, perhaps the positive comment is made to confer acceptance of MtF cross dressers. A bit of encouragement. An attempt to put someone at ease. I have to assume the MtF cross dresser is tastefully attired. I've seen some MtF cross dressers I'd totally avoid in the same manner I would avoid a natural woman attired in the same manner.

[char GG]

I am just wondering if you would like it?

My husband gets lots of compliments, usually from women, and he likes it. He doesn't get offended if they know he's a CDer.

I have complimented CDers in my husband's social group because we all know they are CDers. If I saw a CDer that I didn't know, I would be hesitant to offer a compliment. Not sure if they want to be acknowledged in any way. Some are kind of skittish.

I complimented a guy (who was in guy mode) on his "flight six pack" tee shirt! He seemed happy.

[Desiree2bababe]

I don't think I've met a woman who doesn't love a compliment. While shopping for heels at DSW the other week, a drop dead gorgeous woman was seeing how a pair of 5 inch heels felt and I could not help myself in telling her they looked super hot on her. She just smiled.

[Jenny22]

"This day and age we're living in gives cause for apprehension .... " as the song goes. So just be careful how you form a compliment to a female (Micki Finn's is right on). My complements are almost always on their nail polish, and they always smile and say thanks.
However, if at check out, the cashier is youngish and her nail polish is a mess, I may offer her, "your polish could be much prettier" (or similar). "I know. I'm going to polish them tonight" (or similar) is her normal response.

[AllieSF]

I get them and don't mind them at all. Now some of my very serious (in thought) close trans (TS) friends may have a completely different take on the situation. Some just want people to leave them alone and because of their personal sensitivities, prefer that no one acknowledges that they look good "for a MtF trans person). Char asked the correct question because it does not matter how I or others feel. It is how you feel. If starting out receiving compliments, I personally would accept them for what they are, someone accepting who you are and what it took to get there, there being out in public open to looks, jeers, compliments or whatever.

[Fran in skirts]

I will always give a smile and look them in the eye and give them what ever complement they have coming whether it is for clothing or makeup (nails etc.). I have never had anyone get mad or upset because of it. :)

Fran

[Leslie Langford]

Personally, I wouldn't rise to the bait.

The woman wearing the low cut top and showing off excessive boobage knew EXACTLY what she was doing. One doesn't randomly throw together such an outfit by rummaging through the laundry hamper because there didn't happen to be anything else clean to wear that particular day, so she's either some sort of attention-seeking exhibitionist or else at a particular point in her monthly cycle where she is fertile and her subconscious is causing her to telegraph that to a potential mate in this manner the way nature intended.

Then again, maybe it's a set-up to entrap some unwary male into uttering what could be construed as an inappropriate comment to make an example of him in this age of #metoo. That, or else she could be a streetwalking hooker whose trademark clothing usually consists of over-the-top sexy attire to catch the eye of a potential "John".

Either way, nothing good could ever come of acknowledging either this woman's physique or in-your-face clothing style coming from a man. The preferred course of action here would be more along the lines of "Move along, folks, nothing to see here" as the cops would typically say at an accident scene or the like.

[TracyT]

I often compliment women but I do it specifically: "Your hair looks nice." "I love your nail color!" "What a cute skirt!" For obvious reasons I notice when a woman has cut or colored or curled her hair, and they never fail to appreciate it when I notice and compliment them. I wouldn't go for "nice legs." That's a little on the creepy side.

[Ineke Vashon]

I bought a ticket from a pretty young (emphasis young!) woman at a museum entrance. She had on a gorgeous blouse. Without thinking I said "what a pretty blouse." She half fell of her chair and ran away, laughing hysterically :jump:. Oh well.

Ineke

[susan54]

I feel more confident about giving compliments when I am dressed up myself. There is probably an unspoken assumption that a man in a dress is probably not trying to pick someone up. I am fortunate to work with some very stylish young women and I am wary of how I compliment them. I get a lot of positive feedback about my legs, my figure and my outfits and all this makes going out dressed so much more fun. The best compliment I ever got was shopping in a dress agency as a man, I tried on an expensive dress. The owner asked to see me in it. I had added forms and heels (I do not even own hip pads), and when I emerged she said "That's not fair". I bought the dress and it remains a favourite.

[Kiwi Primrose]

My approach is usually "am I allowed to say how much I like........".
It works every time and leads to lovely conversations.

[Sometimes Steffi]

Sometimes, I lead off with, "I know this is a very chic thing to say, but I love your ..."