"I'm a transbian."

[docrobbysherry]

I've seen this many times online. It's supposed to mean a M to F trans that likes women, I think. :brolleyes:

But, I don't like it for a number of reasons. What do think of it?:straightface:

[Tracy Irving]

It doesn't affect me. I'm going to do whatever I want regardless of any label someone tries to stick on me.

[Ineke Vashon]

Sounds a bit like a crosstown busline to me.

Ineke

[biancabellelover]

The description works for me. That is, I’m somewhere on the Trans spectrum but am only sexually attracted to women.

But I’m not a great fan of labels, particularly and especially labels I then have to explain.

I just describe myself as a Crossdresser.

Michelle.

[Princess Chantal]

I have seen it used by mtf transgender folks who have an attraction/preference for mtf transgender folks. All of my transsexual friends that have preference for women (trans or not) tend to describe theirselves as lesbians.
People have labelled my relationship with Vanessa (a crossdresser) as a transbian couple, in which is a term I personally would never use to describe us.

[Charlotte7]

The thing is, we just don't have enough labels yet.

[Teresa]

Charlotte,
Are you serious ?

Don't you think the general public are confused enough over the labels now , even on this forum they are used and misused .

I personally want to intergrate with the public so I do want them to understand and accept me , most haven't got their heads round the basic labels .

Sherry,
Sorry the label doesn't do much for me , I'm trying hard not to use labels anymore but if I do I just tell people I'm TG and leave it to them to think about it and ask any questions if they feel the need . Otherwise my label now simply says Teresa .

[Crissy 107]

Teresa, I think Charlotte may have been kidding.
Crissy

[Charlotte7]

Charlotte,
Are you serious ?

Don't you think the general public are confused enough over the labels now , even on this forum they are used and misused .

There are two ways to answer this question;

Yes, of course I'm serious, deadly serious, only when every minutiae of us and our ways is dissected and labelled can we break free from public misunderstanding and the tyranny of oppression.

No, I'm not being in the remotest bit serious

I'll let you pick ;)

[Bobbi46]

I think we have enough labels for now yes there are others perhaps fine tuning a particular gender but generally there are enough labels out there already for the unknowing ones to understand our various differences.

[Lacey New]

Well, if it is supposed to describe a cross dresser who is only sexually attracted to women, then I suppose I’m one. But I agree, do we really need another term supposedly defining us? Or is this another example of identity politics splitting us into little micro groups so we can have only our own agenda and be offended by others whose agenda is slightly different?

[Teresa]

Charlotte,
On a serious note I find the public aren't interested in dissecting us to see what makes us tick . I did ask the question on the forum that suggested they mostly see us all as crossdressers , what anatomy we have or don't have isn't important to them , they see what they want to see and accept you or not on that basis . I'm happy to say it's going very well for me .

It was a fun story but at my daughter's wedding in my speech I told both my children I was very proud of them with all the letters they can now use after their names , I added the ones my wife gives me aren't repeatable in public !!

[MarinaTwelve200]

"Labels" are necessary. We think in WORDS and if we have no word for something we cannot think about it. ---- The RESOLUTION of the mind is a direct function of VOCABULARY it's a lot better to have an "HD" mind than a "480p" one.

[Beverley Sims]

Sorry Sherry,
I am not a labels person I am just me.

I have no explanation for my thinking or any abnormalities I might have.

[kimdl93]

I have no need for another term, but those who do are welcome to it.

[Aunt Kelly]

As If the lesbian community didn't have enough animus for us already.... And yes. I find it glib and offensive.

[Krisi]

I've never heard that term before but it's not uncommon on this forum for a crossdresser to say he is a "male lesbian". Try that as a pickup line in a lesbian bar. ;)

[Robertacd]

More labels... So what other labels does adopting this one make you feel superior over or is it only used in the derogatory?

[Micki_Finn]

I’ve never seen it used personally but I feel like the term is a little... flippant? I guess I’d have to see it in use

[Jaylyn]

I don't really care for labels as related to that person is different and not a normal person. I don't even like the term normal because who's to say what normal is any more? I think of my self as a man that enjoys dressing from time to time. Not daily do I dress. I wear my panties more than the full dressed up look like a lady does and wear what I enjoy and feel good wearing. Putting a label on something conjures up many negative thoughts in those minds that do not know what definition is meant by the word. We already have too many negatives why add another word that can push us farther from being accepted as just who we are a human that enjoys wearing the softer prettier clothes. I like the old saying " I don't care what you call me just as long as you don't forget to call me for supper" ( but then when mom called us to supper we had to go clean up so I guess even that calling had something different in its meaning.

[Sarah Doepner]

I'm not fond of it since it tends to blend sexuality and gender at a time when we have been attempting to pry the two apart as we attempt to explain who we are. And I agree with Kelly that we really don't need to aggravate anyone else in the LGBTQ+ community.

Besides, you are Sherry and that's the only label that really works for you.

[Stacy Darling]

I'm "PAN"

Everything is fine if it's your scene!

Loving is loving!

[Foxy Lady]

My wife calls me a lesbian in a mans body, I sort of like it.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Sherry :hugs:, If my:love:Wife called me that I would be OK with it. >Orchid..O:daydreaming:O..

[Jenny22]

I've never heard the term used, but I have no real problem with it as defined. "What's in a name .....?"

I once (a bit jokingly) described myself as 'hetero-flexible.' Can someone define that so it makes sense?

[JaytoJillian]

meh. meh. meh.

[Micki_Finn]

Heteroflexible is actually a thing.
I've never heard the term used, but I have no real problem with it as defined. "What's in a name .....?"

I once (a bit jokingly) described myself as 'hetero-flexible.' Can someone define that so it makes sense?

[GracieRose]

The description describes me.
The word doesn't enthuse me.
I feel that I'm a lesbian in a male body.

[Fran in skirts]

Just another label to be used against us. I do not use labels and do not believe in labels. As far as I am concerned labels are for cans and boxes and I am not one of those. The only label that includes me is HUMAN!

[Ressie]

Sounds stoopid. period. :eek:

[DanielleCD]

This is one of those compound words that is trying to describe two different things together... gender and sexual preference. Just trying to put everyone in little boxes to sort them out without realizing that we don't live in boxes and the world isn't black and white. JMTC

[Roxanne Lanyon]

I am a Girl! So there! And that makes me ever so happy, too!
Being Roxanne Forever!

[Joyce Swindell]

Or an airline! Fly Transbian Airlines

- - - Updated - - -

A compound word..... still just a word. Labels....also just a word.... calling out other words. So as long as we communicate with them, conversations will go on. Be offended or not, perpetuate it or don't. Only one thing in life is change. It may catch on....who knows? I say live and let live. What ever happened to the teachings sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me?

[Sarasometimes]

I'm with Sarah in that it joins two things together that are independent of each other equals more confusion and misunderstandings.

Charlotte7 "Surely you can't be serious?" "I'm dead serious and don't call me Shirley?" Sorry I thought this thread needed and Airplane reference to lighten the mood.

[LeannS]

sorry my label making machine is out of label making material

[Jenny22]

Yep. I searched and found same, Micki. It's akin to Bi-curious.

[Alice Torn]

DRS, I don't like it, just another term. When will it end!! Crazy times we live in, in spite of some good things, and more tolerance for us who are different. I am just "unusual". i think , that you and i both are dealing with Autogynophelia or aroused and attracted to our other side, all dolled up in the mirror. The lady we transform into, is what and who we are attracted to .

[Asew]

I think the term has a place since so many people think dressers are into men, so this easily conveys they like to dress and like women. If I felt like a woman I might even use this term.

[Devi SM]

Charlotte,
Are you serious ?

Don't you think the general public are confused enough over the labels now , even on this forum they are used and misused .

I personally want to intergrate with the public so I do want them to understand and accept me , most haven't got their heads round the basic labels .

Sherry,
Sorry the label doesn't do much for me , I'm trying hard not to use labels anymore but if I do I just tell people I'm TG and leave it to them to think about it and ask any questions if they feel the need . Otherwise my label now simply says Teresa .

I completely agree with Teresa.
People need labels and talking about sex it comes to be very confusing.
My own experience is weird. Everything begins with me being bisexual but never interested in men dressed or naked but sex was great, top or bottom.
After went out to wife, as a condition she asked me no more that kind of sex, while sex with her was great but after being in hormones something crucially changed in my mind. I realized that gender is not the same as sex. Thoug the t blocker the libido hasn't dissapear, have with sex still being great but now I hate, feel remorse and find disgusting all that bisexual activity I had, so s2x with wife is great, more now with real boobies both enjoy activity there and down the way to have sex has changed too, I think, like lesbians do, more oral and manual stimulation. We're happy and completely satisfy but I dont like transbian, i prefer lesbian but no longer promiscous.

[Bobbi46]

I think Transbian is a horrible word, I thought we had enough words to describe/explain the different sections of our community. Surely another one is just going to confuse/complicate the issue.

[Confucius]

I still like the term heterosexual crossdresser. It's simple and clear. No need to add terms to confuse the public.

[Lygophilia]

Whatever...

[docrobbysherry]

The description describes me.
The word doesn't enthuse me.
I feel that I'm a lesbian in a male body.

I like that about as much as I do, "transbian", Gracie!:doh:
Here's the dictionary definition of "lesbian:
1. a homosexual woman. synonyms: homosexual woman, gay woman; informalbutch, femme; offensivedyke, bulldyke,

U can call yourself a unicorn in a man's body for all I care. But, few people will understand or agree with u!:straightface:

[Patience]

Whatever...Good answer.

By the way, would “Transbian” and “Lesgender” be interchangeable?

[Heather Chasen]

I am a human! I look like a human , I move like a numan , I sound like a human. I am a human bieng I am not a number or a label I am human!!!

[Aunt Kelly]

I think the term has a place since so many people think dressers are into men, so this easily conveys they like to dress and like women. If I felt like a woman I might even use this term.

No. Just no. Putting on women's clothes does not make you a woman. If you are not a woman you can't be a lesbian, no matter how cute or clever you think think the misappropriation of the term.

Shaking head...

[docrobbysherry]

So, Heather, would u answer these questions with, "I'm a human"?

"U dress in woman's things, r u gay?"

"R u transgender or a transsexual"?

"Do u always go to work dressed like that?"

[Patience]

If you are not a woman you can't be a lesbian, no matter how cute or clever you think think the misappropriation of the term.

Shaking head...I thought “lesbian” was the correct term to describe the sexual orientation of the female counterpart of a heterosexual crossdressing male.

I don't think the GG lesbians are up in arms about us borrowing it...

[t-girlxsophie]

I was Trisexual for a while,try anything (at least once) :)
Sophie

[Aunt Kelly]

Think again, Patience. And know with certainty that the lesbian community (generally speaking) considers your assertion to be laughable. A sizable number have no use even for transwomen. Get dressed and go hit on the girls at a lesbian bar if you doubt me.

[docrobbysherry]

Mykell, I noticed u referred to your friend as a "fem lesbian". Does she refer to u as a "male lesbian"? If so, you've just hedged on what u posted!:heehee:

U must see Aunt Kelly's point? U and your friend can call you anything u like.
But, u can't expect everyone else to understand and/or agree!:brolleyes:

[Patience]

Think again, Patience. And know with certainty that the lesbian community (generally speaking) considers your assertion to be laughable.I'm not sure anyone here is fully qualified to speak for "the lesbian community (generally speaking)", but if your assertion is based on people you know, I fear you are courting the acquaintance of some bitter, nasty, and mean-spirited lesbians. Laughing at another person's legitimate questions concerning sexuality? Really?


A sizable number have no use even for transwomen. Get dressed and go hit on the girls at a lesbian bar if you doubt me.

I'm beginning to get a sense of where you are going wrong. The notion that I need to go to a lesbian bar to have my lesbian credentials validated is disingenuous. You seem be under the impression that lesbians are only attracted to other lesbians when that's obviously not the case. Lesbians, Aunt Kelly, are attracted to Women. Whether the women they are attracted to are lesbian or not is totally beside the point.

I can't speak for other CDers, of course, but if I am presenting myself as a female, with the clothes, the makeup, the accessories and all that goes with it, it just stands to reason that my natural attraction to females (which does not change when I'm dressed) must also be re-framed from a feminine perspective. So, to emphasize the fact I am presenting as a female but am attracted to women, "Lesbian" is the most apt descriptor.

Transwoman? Moi?

[Aunt Kelly]

Yet again, no. A lesbian is, by definition, a woman who is attracted to women. By your own description, you are heterosexual male. Being a crossdresser does not change that. Again, I invite you to test out your (at best) naive assertion with real lesbians.
BTW, most of the lesbians whom I can count among personal acquaintances are not mean spirited, nasty or bitter, but I will wager that even they would scoff at yet another crossdresser trying call himself a lesbian.

[Alice B]

Sherry, I do not think there is a defination for you. You are so far ahead of the rest of us in presentation and ideas. You set a standard that no one else has even come close to. And for one - I love it. There is no defining you

[Princess Chantal]

I can’t ever recall the “lesbian in a man’s body” statement ever being said or received with seriousness. Seems to be used lightheartedly for some giggles and laughs.

[sometimes_miss]

It's more honest than stating that you're a lesbian if you are a male, and more accurate than stating that you're a lesbian when you're actually a MTF TS who is, and perhaps always has been strictly attracted to GG females. Lesbians are GG females who are attracted to Females. Most people still don't think of MTF TS post op females, as the same as female at birth, GG females. Perhaps the whole identification issue comes down to growing up male, and thinking that 'a hole is a hole is a hole', and they're all the same, because to a lot of men, sex is defined to them as intercourse, and in that alone, perhaps there is not enough difference in their minds.

Perhaps think of it this way: You can take a Corvette and change all the bodywork including the interior to make it look just like a Ferrari Daytona, and without having an actual Ferrari Daytona to compare it to, you just might be able to fool people into thinking it's the genuine article; but under all the externals, where no one can see without getting really, really close and 'looking underneath the hood', it's still a Chevy.


I was Trisexual for a while,try anything (at least once) :)
Sophie

In my younger days, I used to joke that I must be buysexual; that I must be so unnattractive to women, that I'd always have to buy it.

[Tracy Irving]

First let me say that I don't care if anyone wants to use the male lesbian term or not. I have no skin in that game.


If you are not a woman you can't be a lesbian

So, if you are a man, you can not be a lesbian.

If you are a man who thinks he is a woman, you can not be a lesbian

If you are a man who wants to be a woman, you can not be a lesbian

If you are a man living as a woman, fully integrated in your community, you can not be a lesbian.

Only a biological woman can be a lesbian.

Gender is irrelevant.

If men can't be lesbians and women can be lesbians then men can't be (or become) women. They can only pretend to be women.

Good luck trying to convince some of the members of that!

[Micki_Finn]

Getting back to the term “Transbian” I had an epiphany on the perfect use for the term. General consensus seems to be its questionable to use for “crossdressers attracted to women”. I say the term Transbian is perfect for describing crossdressers who are attracted to other crossdressers.

[Roxanne Lanyon]

But, is it true if a frog had wings, he would not bump his ass every time he came iin for a landing? Wearing a skirt, of course!
Roxanne

[JulesLynne]

First there was the “Gay Community.”
Then it slowly morphed into LGB.
Slowly added the T.
Then somehow “Queer” turned from a 1980s insult hurled by grade school kids into the Q on LGBTQ.
Then we added the Intersexed and Androgynous.
I honestly don’t know what the + in LGBTQIA+ stands for.

So in spite of adding all of these labels, somehow the term “transbian” is offensive?

I get it—everyone is entitled to their own opinions and identities. So if someone wants to apply the label “transbian” to themselves, why should that bother me or anyone else? Just like some people used to use the term “queer” in a derogatory way, others today embrace it to describe themselves.

[Aunt Kelly]

First let me say that I don't care if anyone wants to use the male lesbian term or not. I have no skin in that game.



So, if you are a man, you can not be a lesbian.

So stipulated, providing that we define "man" as one who identifies as male.



If you are a man who thinks he is a woman, you can not be a lesbian

If you are a man who wants to be a woman, you can not be a lesbian

If you are a man living as a woman, fully integrated in your community, you can not be a lesbian.

Only a biological woman can be a lesbian.

Gender is irrelevant.

If men can't be lesbians and women can be lesbians then men can't be (or become) women. They can only pretend to be women.

Good luck trying to convince some of the members of that!

Now you are completely off the rails. To define us by our genetics, and nothing else, is absurd. It certainly flies in the face of virtually everything we have learned about gender identity. If you want to take such a position, logic would make your above-quoted statements true. Unfortunately, reality can be rather nuanced from time to time, and the reality is that the consensus of those most learned in the field renders your premise inaccurate, and thereby, your conclusion incorrect.

[Tracy Irving]

If you are not a woman you can't be a lesbian

Your quote, not mine. All I did was present a logical continuation of YOUR view. A view I do not agree with.
When you ignored gender you insulted many members here.

Thank you for admitting your premise is inaccurate and your conclusion incorrect.

I want everyone to find the happiness they seek. I don't want to fight or argue with anyone but I will always speak up for and defend those who are told they can't.