Big step forward with wife

[Mermaiden]

A few weeks ago I confessed to my wife I have progressed from just wearing panties, which is she cool with, to having purchased a dress. I didn’t expect enthusiasm but really want to be honest and share myself with her. She looked a bit uncomfortable and didn’t say much. The next morning she told me she had been reading on line and learned a lot of men don’t know how to dress to as a woman. Her point was most women don’t wear dresses, but rather jeans and yoga tights. She was trying to accept and help me. That was a positive response and an open door!

She took me out shopping for a pair of women’s jeans and joined me in the dressing booth to try them on. Then, to my great joy, she asked if I needed a top to go with them. Of course I’d been eyeing the racks of tops. We bought two.

Now I can wear women’s jean’s or tights with some feminine tops while we watch TV or read in the evening. I even wore my jeans with her to go out the movies.

I’m amazed by the tranquility this has brought. It’s not the end of it all, I’m sure. I haven’t broached bras with her as that would be pushing too far, at least for now. But I’m so pleased our marriage can accommodate this much.

[Maid_Marion]

Yes, it is wonderful that your wife is trying to help you out with your dressing! Best of luck to you both!

[Elizabeth G]

That sounds great, congrats!

You ate off to a great start but please be careful about going to far too fast. There are many stories here where an initially accepting partner pulls back after being overwhelmed by getting pushed to accept more than they are ready for.

I wish you the best of luck.

[kimdl93]

Sounds like she is willing to take the lead. Let her find a pace that works for her. Enjoy this. It’s a great place to be.

[Crissy 107]

Great news! Elizabeth is correct so taking it slow is the way to go.
Crissy

[Leslie Mary S]

Sounds like a great step forward. I bet she will even start talking to you about how a bra would help properly fill the top.

[Teri Ray]

Good news,

Keep up you communication and remain honest. Remember that your wife is your number one priority. Your desire to dress is secondary. Don't rush anything and you both will find your best path to dealing with your dressing desires. Best wishes.

[ElianaFrozenflame]

Awesome news, Mermaiden! Thanks for sharing. "Taking it slow" is great advice! I have a very accepting wife, and I've learned that is often better to ask for a little less than she has offered, at first. Wives (or at least mine, anyways), out of compasssion, sometimes offer up more than they themselves can handle. But given them the time and space, she is able to ease into what she verbally offered. It sounds like she is searching online to understand. I'd encourage you to engage her in what she has read. She has probably read more than just that "a lot of men do not know how to dress as a woman". It could make for a very connective talk.

[GretchenM]

That is great to hear. So happy for your achievement in finding a peaceful path forward. For many of us, it goes the other way no matter what we do.

But be careful. Women can be very experimental. They will sometimes do something just to see how the other person reacts. Not saying you should not trust her, but be aware that she might be setting a boundary that establishes what is acceptable to her. If you push beyond the boundary you will hear about it. It is good that you perceive the possibility that this is boundary setting and are cautious about approaching the bra issue. Just wait. Maybe drop some hints while out shopping together. If you pass by the intimates department let her see you look at a rack of bras noticeably longer than usual, but don't say anything or stop for a touchy-feely moment. Make sure she notices you looking. For example, if you are pushing the cart slow down a little as you pass the rack and then speed up. Hint, hint it with her. Once might not be enough. Maybe she will suggest that step; maybe not. Seeing her husband showing boobs is often well beyond the tolerance boundary for a lot of SOs and it get her hackles up. Approach with caution. Baby steps.

[Lisa516]

Great news, I did a bit of research and found the items below interesting

"Most wives are not comfortable sharing their femme identity with a cross-dressers femme self. Take away her role as the lead female and she is devastated!"

"Remember that you changed the dynamics of your marriage by coming out. You need to be respectful of your wife being the primary woman in the relationship, not your femme self. Your wife always comes first if you want your marriage to work."

A Happy wife is a happy life :)

[Jaylyn]

You are blessed to have a wife that accepts and is willing to move a little in the direction you are headed. Be careful though and not push it hard and fast. Mine started out and was very accepting and helped me a lot. I think I went way to fast and then out of the blue we became a DADT. She told me she didn't marry a Jaylyn but a Jay. I did make the choice to slow down and just accept that she is not on board any more and have stored every thing but my panties I still wear as much as I can. Things can go backward as fast as they go forward for us. Good luck

[Krisi]

Well that's good news but don't buy a lot of stuff before you buy your breast forms and hip pads. You'll wear different sizes then.

[Crissy 107]

Jaylyn, Unfortunately your story is not unique but happens when we take a small amount of acceptance and run with it.
Crissy

[Giselle(Oshawa)]

congrats sis take it slow and steady and give your wife a big hug for me

[Beverley Sims]

Yes,
it is a big step forward, but as others have expressed, don't push it or go too fast, one pointer I have is when you try something on, DON'T ask for your wife's opinion, she will let you know in her own good time. Enjoy what you have and the rest will come eventually.

[alwayshave]

Mermaiden, That sounds great. It sounds like she is trying to get you to blend rather than stand out.

[Diane Taylor]

That's wonderful that your wife has taken the steps she has. Wish you the best of luck as you move forward. Go slow, be patient, and you'll make better progress than by trying to dump everything out at once.

[Sherrii]

Yes as others have said, be sure to take it slow. After a while you might ask her if she doesn't think maybe " something to fill out the tops wouldn't look nice?"

[Micki_Finn]

It sounds like she took the opportunity to steer you away from the dress to something a little more androgynous. Shes a keeper lol.