Cross dressing and weight

[MiniRock]

One thing that's bothered me over the last couple of years is that I'm finding it ever harder to keep my weight down. Clearly I don't like it from a health point of view. Moreover it is not flattering even when dressed as a man. But worse than that somehow is that, if I can't keep my physique at least reasonably in trim, I know it's going to ruin and probably kill my desire to cross dress. Because my motivation is entirely to feel and look, within the bounds of reality, sexy. Fortunately, if I wear a bit of shapewear, it holds my stomach in well enough that my favourite pink frock still looks pretty slinky. But if and when it doesn't, that will be the end for me. The thought of a beer gut hanging over sexy lacy knickers just doesn't hit the spot!

Clearly women suffer this issue too as they age any many seem to content themselves with wearing practical - feminine certainty - but by no means sexy clothing. And from some of the photos on this sight, it seems that some of you are happy to take the same route.

Actually, this ties into the question of passing as well. Because, for example, I've been advised here to try lower heels and a wig in order to be able to go out in the daytime. The latter I might get round to, but the former has somewhat less appeal - although of course many women manage to look very sexy and elegant without looking like hookers. But not, imho, if they're fat.

So my question to you possibly older ladies out there is, idoes weight gain affect your motivation to dress up? Or are you content to transition (in a different sense than that usually meant on this forum) towards age and figure appropriate clothing? Or perhaps, as is my suspicion, this is something that highlights the difference between those of us who are men in women's clothing and those of us who actually want to feel like women. Thoughts thereon also sought.

[DanielleDubois]

I am 65 and have thought about your question in my posted thread " WYSIWYG or "How do you feel about Cleveland" "

[Beverley Sims]

I am 5' 7" and weigh 145lbs, a bit shapeless but in jeans and a top I present reasonably well.

[Maid_Marion]

I keep in shape gardening and maintaining the yard. I've even figured out ways of stretching it out to all all year activity. My waist line is not only two inches less than it was a decade ago, but I now carry my weight in the right places, even though I weigh half a stone less (7 lbs). My doctor says that whatever I'm doing is fine, as long as I don't lose any more weight.

[Angela Marie]

At 64 i'm between 5ft 6 and 7. Yeah we do shrink a bit as we get older. Fortunately I have exercised regularly for 40 years. Your weight is going to shift as you age; nothing you can do about that. Exercise should include aerobic and weight training, and a healthy diet is just as important.
But remember; aside from looking good in clothes, the real benefit is to your health. In the end that is what really counts.

[Roxanne Lanyon]

Oh my, weight is the ting I worry about so much! Now that I have reached 70, (I could simply cry!), my weight will just not go down, no matter what I do. I have tried diets, exercise, whatever, but I still stay around a size 2X Plus! Oh girls, help me, please! I now have a little heart problems, atrial fibulation, and a slightly leaky heart valve, and I take a lot of pills, daily. I go to the gym three times a week, but I cannot get too vigorous because of getting winded. But I hardly eat anything (I would make a good, cheap date!) but cannot seem to lose a pound! I am at a lose! And I adore wearing pretty dresses, and things. Oh, girls, Roxanne sometimes feels like she is such a mess, and just wants to cry!
Roxanne Lanyon

[sara66]

I am 300lbs and a size 24 to 28. The only thing that bothers me is that I cant always find what I like in my size and sometimes I don't like the way things look on me. This may because I have no hips and carry my weight in my middle. It is no different that finding large size shoe. On the up side I have lost 30+lbs since I told my wife.

Sara

[GretchenM]

At 73 I am a bit overweight and my doctor has told me to lose weight. So, I have tried. I ate less and exercised more for a few weeks. The scale remained on 205. So, I went back to my prior routine and after a couple of weeks the scale still read 205. Then came a holiday and I ate and drank more. Now the scale read 206. So I practically starved myself for 2 weeks and the scale read 204. I questioned the scale. I tested it by standing on the scale holding a heavy box. The weight difference was the weight of the box. Scale is honest and trustworthy. Conclusion? Some of us just have great difficulty losing weight. When it comes to our biology we are not created equal.

Women who are 73 rarely ever do the sexy thing because their interest in sex pretty much died a few years earlier. Things change and so do we. My solution? There are some really pretty tunic tops. Far from sexy, but quite feminine. In short, adapt to the changes that will come as you age. There is more to life than being sexy looking as male or female. And you can still be attractive even though perhaps no longer sexy.

But then perhaps you will have better luck at losing weight than I have. I'm still trying, but the scale still reads 205, no matter what I do. It's biology and as a biologist I can assure you that living organisms, as individuals, often do not follow the rules. It sometimes takes the road less traveled. After all, I am TG.

[alwayshave]

I am dieting so that my muffin top is less noticeable. Health concerns are an issue as well. I'm 6'2 240, size 18W.

[Maid_Marion]

A scale really helps when cooking for one. When I measure out pancake mix the most accurate way to do that is by weight. It also ensures consistent portion sizes. Cooking is also a way to get some exercise.

[Micki_Finn]

You seem to be under the impression that women are just “sexy” up until a certain point at which they become matrons. Women fight tooth and nail every day to live up to the beauty standard. Diet, exercise, skin care, hair care ,hair removal, shape wear, make up, plastic surgery etc etc.

If you want to be “sexy” you have to make the commitment.

[Stephanie47]

I'm six foot even these days which is down from six foot two decades ago...spinal collapse as part of the aging process. When I was six foot two I ranged from a ghastly looking 138 pounds to maybe 190 pounds. As the shrinkage in height occurred the weight did go up. When I was renewing my driver's license one year the clerk suggested I update my weight. Egads! That really hurt looking at 215 pounds IN PRINT! That motivated me to dump the beer and soda. Now at six foot even money it's 195-200 pounds. The measurements come in at 42-38-40, so I am a larger person than most males and 99.95% females. What's a cross dresser to do? I cannot fix the visual. I can plaster on all the makeup I want with a trowel. It will not change a thing.

At my age (71) I still only wear dresses, no pants. That's my thing. I find there are plenty of dresses on the market that look terrific on women in their 40-60 age range who still work outside the home. Two inches above the knee and downward look fine on me. In my mind the days of wearing a mini dress are long gone. I'm never going to have a slim waist. I accentuate the bust line and wear dresses such as sheaths and empire waists which fit at the bust and not the waist. If I was five foot six my body proportions would be the same as most women in my age group.

I don't feel like a man in women's clothing although I look like a man in women's clothing. I don't know what it feels to be a woman since I am not. The clothes just reflect how I feel for the day. Some days when I do have the entire day or more to do anything I want, there is no motivation to don a pretty dress. I just do not think in terms of male or female anymore.

[Anna Gracie]

Growing old is something different for us.
Exercise and the right diet is a must for my lifestyle. Candy, fast food and soft drinks are banned in my house. I just think its worth a lot more to wear a nice dress then eating garbage.

[Robertacd]

Well being on the large size all my life I take it as an insult that you are basically saying that fat women can't be sexy.

I have seen lots of BBW's that were very sexy dressed and undressed.

Anyway I find a bit of fat helps a lot as it's soft and pliable, very easy to get a feminine figure when you have some fat to push around with shapeware.

Here is an example of how fat helps me with Crossdressing

https://m.imgur.com/a/MU2G1aZ
(https://m.imgur.com/a/MU2G1aZ)
EDIT: Fixed the link

[Tracii G]

Perhaps you have low testosterone that can cause your issue.
Maybe you should get checked by your Dr and he can make a suggestions of what you can do.
Personally being fat hasn't stopped me from dressing because for me its not about the clothes its about matching the inside to the outside.
Having extra fat helps fill in wrinkles in the face so thats one positive aspect. Helps to make real looking cleavage too.
Dressing the way you like is fine and we all have things about our bodies we don't like so welcome to the club.
Being short and fat isn't my choice but its reality and I will have to deal with it.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Yes Mini, my weight is directly linked to my desire to dress. I'm about 5kg or 11lb over my norm and it's killed the desire stone dead...apart from underwear of course... nothing seems to affect that.

I'm dreading Christmas... I know I'll put on more.

Good luck and keep away from the strudel.

[docrobbysherry]

MiniRock, if I can't look sexy, what's the point?:battingeyelashes:

I'm 75 and when I got serious about Sherry's figure 10 years ago I quit my gym and made gradual diet changes. Even little things, like switching from beer to wine and eating smarter and liter at nite, make a huge difference. I lost 20 pounds and they stayed off! Almost all from my "spare tire". Which was terribly unfem!:doh:

My health, flexibility, and attitude r great for my age. Because I feel the way I look!:D
Anyone can do what I did if their quality of life is more important than just eating and drinking!:sad:

What I see in my mirror makes it all worthwhile!:daydreaming:

298615

[Rachel Anne]

I'm 5 8 and 165 about a size 10, although for bottoms only I can go to a 6 depending if I wear hip pads or not (my Rago cinchers can provide enough curves without depending on the look I'm trying to do). I was about 20# heavier this summer and started a modest diet which has been good for about 4# per month. I've got about 10# left to go to my target of 155. "Frame size" along with height apparently determines what your ideal weight should be, and determining frame size is done by measuring your wrist and checking a chart. When I do it this way, I'm off-scale low for male, but right on the border for small and medium frame for female (funny side note, my mother always had to buy "women's watches" and "slim" clothes for me growing up because men's watches/clothes were impossibly large for me...if only she knew I'd have been happy with my sister's hand me downs ;)).

If I stick to that chart, I should be 140-145 for women, but considering I'm not one and besides, there is no way I could ever get down that low now and not look terrible. So I settled on 155 which is where there is some overlap in what's considered ideal for both.

Over the years, I've learned which brands seem to cater to "realistic women", and I've found those fit well. Right now I'm about a 10 from Ann Taylor & J.Crew, and if I finish my program, I might be able to do an 8, which would make me happy. I could easily wear 6s and mediums in my early 20s (when I was about 145#), so I'll take that as a win if I get there.

[Devi SM]

I'm 5'8" 59 years old. The pursuing of a sexy girly shape was in my mind from the beginning and I lost from 220 to 165 lbs with keto.
I still on keto is a life style way not just eat, but, sleep, exercise, etc. Now in 7 months on HRT I had had to double or fix my diet because before I start it I was in 156 and has been impossible to lose weight, more than that I gained some. Hormones make more difficult to lose weight and i gain some may be for fat redistribution ution. Gain on hips, tighs and of course breast.
No all women have that hourglass shape. When getting older women get in menopause that is a unbalance on hormones and that make them gain weight but most of the time at waist level as men. Some try diets and exercise but it doesn't work for all. Hormones es are a powerful enemy of that lovely hourglass shape but I think, if not already give up, all women want that shape so if you want to be a woman or look like the shape is fundamental...

[Gillian Gigs]

Too many of us suffer from the middle age 'spread' and have to fight to keep the weight off. A couple of things that have helped me are;

1. I work hard at keeping sugar out of my diet. Sugar is every where and it is a constant battle to stay on top of it. Sugar is the problem, not fat, and the sugar industry has fooled us all into cutting out fat, and not sugar. Yes, we need to reduce our fat intake also.
2. We all need to get off our fat butts and get walking. Walking is the best exercise to loose weight and it is not hard on the joints. Look for ways to walk, instead of driving. Look for ways to increase the amount of steps you take in a day. The biggest muscles in the body are found in the legs, so start using those legs. As a benefit to walking my legs look a lot better in hosiery now than they did 2 years ago. Not in a muscular way either, just firmer, and sleeker. It helps with the stomach also.
3. The more exercise you do, the more energy you will have. This sounds like a contradiction, but it is proven that exercise increases your metabolism which has all kinds of benefits.
4. And now for the bad news, beer and liquor don't help with keeping your weight under control. Too often some kind of junk food is added to the drinks, which doubles up on the problem of increased intake.

Whether male, or female, if you want to cut a nice figure it takes discipline and work, but there are rewards and benefits. In my case I am into smaller sizes now and have more to choose from. Coming down two sizes in women clothing makes a big difference.

[sometimes_miss]

Try the Atkins diet. Remove all carbs until you have reached your desired weight, then add a few grams a day until you see yourself gaining weight again. Then cut back a little to maintain where you want to be. The Atkins diet has all kinds of yummy satisfying things in it, like BACON.

[Majella St Gerard]

I just lost about 40 lbs and love that I can confidently wear slinky and form fitting outfits, when I was heavier I still wore things I would categorize as sexy but they hid my girth. I also don't find fat attractive, if you're a big girl or guy, wear clothes that are flattering to your figure. Many here and GG's out in the wild do not dress appropriately for their size, 5'5" at 200 lbs in a bodycon dress is not sexy, unless that is what you're into, not me (there are exceptions).

[Vickie_CDTV]

I have been a large person my whole life. It never affected my desire to dress one way or another. I like big women, it is all good as far as I am concerned.

[Tania75]

I weigh in at 72kg, which is around 160lb, and 5'10 in height, and worry if I get over 73kg. Today I had a day off work and went down to my local shopping center (yes, to buy a bra and briefs), but also observing the ladies, for style tips, of course, and it quickly became obvious that it is not your figure which makes you look great, it's your style and how you carry it which is more important. Ladies with a fuller figure don't seem to get obsessed with the supermodel look and concentrate on a classy sophisticated look, which looks beautiful, no matter what the shape.
Summing up, look your best, no matter what your figure is, and most importantly, do it in style.

[Becky Blue]

I am not sure if I fit into your definition of an 'older lady' I hope not. For me Becky is my motivation to keep healthy and to eat well. I very successfully lost 6kgs 13 Pounds on the 5 2 fast diet, it also changed my eating habits forever. i had to stop the diet as my wife started complaining about being too thin.

[OCCarly]

If you think losing weight as a biological male is tough guess what? It’s a lot harder for women. After a year or two of transgender hormone replacement therapy I found that when my estrogen was up, I was hungry all the time. My wife laughed at me and said, “Now you know how to be a woman.”

I’ve found that I have to work a lot harder to lose weight or maintain it. The solution? Ballet workout DVD’s (plus my Tai Chi DVD’s and my stationary bike).

The fun part of working out now is wearing all the cute clothes, especially a leotard and tights for ballet.

So get some women’s exercise DVD’s, get some cute workout clothes, and get to it!

Hugs, Carly

[kayegirl]

Carry, I am with you on the ballet exercise, except that rather than use dvds or whatever, I actually attend an over 55's ballet classes. I'm the only male in a class of 14, but it is very enjoyable, and as a bonus, not only does it keep the weight under control, but it tightens up the tummy muscles, and has improved my general posture no end.

[faltenrock]

I'm about 5'10 and my weight is between 160 and 170 pounds. I try to keep my weight in thatregion which is not very dirfficult for me to do.
Whenever I'll go out for a weekend I'll go down to about 160 and I keeo my eye on staying around 165 .

[Stacy Darling]

I know this chic!

She has the face, and I have the body!

Therefore neither of us could be content right !!! ???

YET when together it matters how?
More thoughts,
Stacy!

[MiniRock]

Wow, thanks for all the great replies ladies; it's been a delight reading them all. So here are my further thoughts based on what you've all said.

1) Dieting/healthy eating/exercise advice welcome and taken on board. I think in a sense, I was admitting to my own failure, i.e. the need to gradually eat less and less the older one gets. It certainly does take a bit of will power, and I'm encouraged now to try even harder.
2) I wasn't really implying that fat women are not attractive. Some larger women certainly are very sexy. And they have a right to look just how they want. Incidentally, @Roberta, you don't look overweight to me, at least not in your avatar. People come in all shapes and sizes and some people are naturally a bit cuddlier than others I think. But myself personally, I know when I'm overweight and I honestly don't like how it looks (irrespective of dress). I'm naturally athletically built and a sagging belly looks to me awful. Hitherto, when I've gained weight, as I have several times in my life, I've dealt with it by eating less (no rocket science involved, but sometimes easier said than done). I need to make the same effort again but, somehow, I feel the change of shape that I'm beginning to see around my middle, the loss of waist for example, is not just weight, it's somehow age related. And not in a way that makes a dress look better. Although I'm encouraged by the photos of those of you who are considerably older than me and still look great.
3) It does seem that there are quite a few of you out there who, like me, indeed feel the need to be of the correct weight to get the most from dressing up. I take this as a net positive for such men and I find it sad that some wives and partners do not therefore value their men's cross dressing proclivities as something to be valued for its positive health benefit on the men they purport to love. In a similar vein, my children's mother would have far rather I relaxed by drinking alcohol than by putting on a frock. Of course, she had no worries that the neighbours would frown upon the alcohol. I don't suppose they'd have cared much about cross dressing either but in her head it was a deal breaker.
4) One final observation which might resonate with other ladies: I once bought a dress with a belt and it was immediately apparent that it the belt couldn't be used because it sat around my chest, even though the length was about right. Skirts and blouse combinations don't suffer from the same problem although even then, the waist is not really where it is meant to be. And I suspect that is how the majority of us get away with wearing clothes designed for the opposite sex. Dresses, in particular the stretchy, form fitting types, don't really have much of a built in shape. Consequently, they adjust to the body of whoever puts them on. Disguise the fact that our shoulders are a bit too big and our hips a bit too small with a jacket and, hey presto, you look great (especially in a photo taken from a low angle). Agree?

Sorry for the long post, by the way. No need to read it all if you find it too boring :)

[Robertacd]

I am a size 16-18 and weigh about 220 pounds so thanks for the compliment.

Click on my avatar and it will take you to my profile where you can see more of the same picture.

[Tracii G]

Some dresses have belts just under the breasts thats just a style so why couldn't you wear it ?

Where the belt is located really doesn't matter.
Womens clothes aren't made for men so whats the problem? You have to work around small things like that to make the item of clothing work for you.

[docrobbysherry]

Minirock, altho I enjoy that Sherry has a sexy figure? That's not about hiding my hips. It's about wearing hip pads!

The MAIN reason I stay in shape is for my health. :)
Looking good is nice, but feeling good at 75 is EVERYTHING!:D
And, I do most of the time. Which explains my energy and productivity. :battingeyelashes:

Also, fat held around your middle is supposed to be the most deadly place. Besides eating better I recommend crunches to maintain core strength. I do 120 every morning on the floor. Along with stretching excersizes, while my tea is cooking!

Remember, diets and excersize r NOT weight loss tools in the long run. Only diet change will work for a life time!:thumbsup:

[MiniRock]

Glad to hear it Sherry. You certainly do still look good though, even if it's only a byproduct of wanting to stay healthy.

[Robertacd]

Some dresses have belts just under the breasts thats just a style so why couldn't you wear it ?


Tracii is correct an "Empire Waist (https://www.liveabout.com/the-empire-waist-dress-4114200)" is supposed to be that high and they work quite well on larger women. In fact an Empire Waist is my favorite dress style.

[MiniRock]

Ok Roberta, thanks for the clarification, I stand corrected. The particular dress I am talking about though was simply a poor fit on me, leastwise with the belt. Without the belt it was half decent, notwithstanding the empty belt loops. I suspect that my waist in the other dresses that I have is also at a different height than would be the case, were a woman to wear them. It´s just that the bodycon/shift style is very flexible in that regard and still looks OK. Perhaps the Empire Waist is also somewhat universal.

[Nancie64]

Just busted the 73 mark last week and over the last year it has been harder to get in the mood to dress. Of course I have put on a few pounds and have tried different things to take the weight off but nothing seems to work. Even a part time job that requires some harder work but no help. Maybe a little has to do with the feel that my SO and Nancie have drifted apart over the same period of time. Maybe it's just the age thing?

[TheHiddenMe]

Weight loss (or gain) is a math game.

Each pound is 3,500 calories. Burn 3,500 calories more than you eat, you lose a pound--and vice versa.

The main way to lose weight is by controlling your calorie intake. When I really want to lose weight, I count calories using the MyFitnessPal app.

Research shows there is no diet that does better than others. The best diet is one you will stick to.

Exercise will make you healthier but it is very hard to Exercise enough on a daily basis to lose weight. I exercise regularly--I do shorter triathlons and running races up to half-marathons--but you can still gain weight if you overeat.

I like to weigh less because my race times are better and If it into slimmer girls clothes. But it's a constant battle, and the graph of my daily weigh-ins looks like a roller coaster ride.

[Tracii G]

Everybody is different and no two peoples metabolisms are the same so you can't say "math" is the absolute answer.
Some people can eat 1500 calories a day and do moderate working out or exercise and still gain weight.
Some people are predisposed to gaining weight.

[Teresa]

MiniRock,
I know this question isn't meant to be provocative so I'm not going to start hopping up and down .

In some repects we have to say beauty is in the eye of the beholder , what one person finds attractive another will find it unattractive . Is it fair to give statistics ? I can't say, it possibly rubs it in to someone who is having a problem controlling their weight . I assume you have ruled out any medical problems so is it more to do with a lack of control over your diet ? To some they must find me annoying , I could eat a horse and not put on an ounce , some people only have to look at food and put weight on .

From your question you appear to have reached a crossroad , do you truly wish to present yourself fully dressed ? Also do you wish to go out more in the public gaze in daylight and not always in clubs and bars as you do at the moment . I ask that because of your comment about sexual appeal . I know it's a fine balancing act between looking good or not so good and looking attractive / sexy . This year I am seeing far more ads on TV for larger clothes to make more ample women look sexy for the the party season . Obviously there is a growing market , some women just have to tell themselves this is as good as it gets , I've done my best just go and enjoy yourself , good for them !

Sorry I've gone round the houses before I reply , I don't have the problem at the age of 67 , being 140 lbs at 5' 7" , I admit I love it . If I gained weight would it stop me , I guess if I drank and ate too much I would blame myself and possibly hate myself for it . If I had problems controlling it for medical reasons I would possibly say to hell with it this is me , I can still dress and enjoy life , it doesn't stop me having fun . As for the passing question , we all come in various shapes and sizes , it stil poses the same question passing as what ??

I apologise , perhaps I should have read all your replies before replying .

[MiniRock]

Hi Teresa,

No, I'm not trying to rile people. I'll happily defend anybody's right to be any weight they wish. I'm just interested in whether there are other ladies out there who keep their weight under control as a byproduct of their desire to look a certain way in a dress. Tracii is right though, everybody is different. If you eat more than your body needs you will gain weight. If you eat less, you will lose it. The difficulty is that, in many cases, our enjoyment of food exceeds our need of it. That is certainly the case for me. Irrespective of what other people think, I regard myself currently as too fat. And I have only myself to blame. And it does spoil how I want dresses look on me. Which, in a sense, is a motivation to me, over and above the health benefits, to lose the weight again. And reading the replies here, it does seem that there is a significant number of ladies who are of the same mind.

Mini

[Teresa]

Mini,
At least you know you can control it if and when you wish to , my weight control is basiaclly now because I live alone , I cook basic meals, one day I 'll make sure I eat vegetables another I will have a meal with salads maybe a treat is something with chips ( French fries ) , last night I had with burgers and salad . I also walk the dog every morning , I admit she is a tie but it gets me out in all weathers to exercise her and I meet some lovely people on the walks .

I hope to return to your city , I had the briefest of trips on a river cruise along the Danube , it is a wonderful way to see part of your lovely country . Two things on my bucket list , retrace my steps and do the cruise again as Teresa and ski some of your lovely slopes in winter .

[Mickitv]

I do understand how you feel about how you look as you age. I have been trying to keep the philosophy of "Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." However, there are many days that I struggle with it just like any woman.

[DanielleCD]

I struggled with my weight for years.. the larger I got, the less my feminine side could exist... feminine clothes when I was 270 lbs at 5'9" just don't look good or feel comfortable at all. A friend of my wife's gave her a book Wheat Belly that we read. The science behind it, actual science rather than ancedotal, supported it's process. It's very keto oriented. We went all in... I lost 1-2 lbs a week for a year.
Today I'm 170 lbs and comfortably wear a size 14, with Spanx a size 12. I look and feel good now. When I see myself in the mirror dressed, I look and feel feminine. One day I intend to write a long post of my weight loss and exercise regime.. don't want to hijack this thread. Goal, see where my body settles weight wise... and hopefully a size 10. Maybe?

[TheHiddenMe]

Everybody is different and no two peoples metabolisms are the same so you can't say "math" is the absolute answer.
Some people can eat 1500 calories a day and do moderate working out or exercise and still gain weight.
Some people are predisposed to gaining weight.


I agree that the largest calorie burn is your basal metabolism, and everyone's basal matabolism is different. So what I can consume on a daily basis is different than any one else on this board.

But the math is the same for everyone. One pound is 3,500 calories.

As to diets such as the Wheat Belly: Diet books are mostly marketing campaigns with little (or no) scientific proof. There are at least 100 (thousand) diet books and they all can't be right. The only part of the diet that works is consuming less calories than you burn. All of the rest of the claims are 99.9% bunk.

[Jane G]

I am 6ft 4. I have spent my entire life trying to stay in shape. There was a time, just a few years ago, I crept up to 17stone 8lbs. Best clevage I ever had. ;). Bit to heavy for comfort though. Hard work and a bit of discipline and I am back down to 15stone 9lbs these days and still trying to lose just a bit more. I feel far better for it. Though that wonderfull clevage has vanished.

[Tracii G]

I don't feel I have lost any femininity in my presentation due to my weight and in ways it has helped to round out my figure in certain places. I don't feel at all negative about it.
I actually physically feel much better now than I did at 155-160 lbs.
Its all been because of medication so its not a genetic thing and I really have no reason to complain.

[missynicole]

I agree 100% with Angela. I exercise about 8 times a week, cardio and weights, wear my fitbit and log most of my food...i am her height and am currently at 165# heading for 160#....i feel great and i think look good in shorter skirts and dresses....some days it is difficult but i keep motivational pics of women i want to look like on my phone...and i think of my man or rather my future man and I want to look good for him....xoxoxo MN

[LovingThePanties]

I've always been in very good shape...for a guy! Not that I'd necessarily want to do anything about it because I spend the overwhelming majority of my time as a guy, but I'm way too muscular to look sexy in most female clothing. It's kind of frustrating because if I didn't have such a muscular build, I wouldn't only pass, but I'd be legitimately attractive when dressed. The upside is that I fill out a pair of yoga pants very, very nicely and will never need shapewear to augment my backside.

[Eemz]

Larger men's sizes are usually taller as well which doesn't work for me. It's actually easier for me to find women's clothes that fit. But if I lost weight it would increase the range of clothes I could wear, so that is a motivation. But overall I'm just trying to look like me, which as someone mentioned earlier may be the difference.

[PantyBoots]

Here are some interesting articles from John Barban, fitness guru:

https://johnbarban.com/mark-haubs-twinkie-weight-loss-diet-works/

https://johnbarban.com/weight-loss-fallacies-2lbs-per-week-and-1200-calories-per-day/

[Jody0712]

Weight is a big issue for most of us. I was 225 lbs in 2016 when I decided it was time to get with it. Through diet and exercise I am now 160 lbs. It was hard at first, but once I saw some results it kept me going. Cycling was the biggest aid in losing and keeping the weight off.

[Judy-Somthing]

The main thing I hate is just about all of the sexy dresses are for smaller women than sz 18.

[TheHiddenMe]

Thanks for the link on the Barban article, especially the first, which in turn links to an article on the "Twinkie diet", which is consistent with the reading I've done (it's calories that count, not the foods that make up the calories).

Exercise is a component in weight loss, but it is secondary to controlling the calories you consume. When I run, my gizmo (watch) says I burn about 125 calories a mile.

When you do the math, that means you have to run about a marathon to lose a pound. It is hard to lose weight only through exercise.

[myrrhlynn]

... (it's calories that count, not the foods that make up the calories)....

sorry, but you couldn't be more wrong.

there are three basic macronutrients; fat, carbohydrates and protein.
they each have a profoundly different hormonal effect on your digestion.

i've been losing weight at a rate of about 10lbs/month for the past 4-5 months.
i have mainly been following the teaching/ lectures/ guidelines of two people.

Dr Robert Lustig on sugar/ processed food.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmC4Rm5cpOI
Dr Jason Fung on diet/ fasting, understanding the 2 compartment problem.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIuj-oMN-Fk

[Alice B]

Without question this is a major influence upon my dressing, selection of clothing and confidence. I am close to 77 and do not want to wear or appear as an old lady. I look much younger from the chest up, but dipping south s another story. With two artifical knees and hips I am afraid it may be too late. I am not happy with dressing at home only, even with my wife reaching total acceptance. I find it hard to even think of going shopping. Any solutios would be appreciated

[Sandra_Dodds]

Have added about 15 lbs over the last 2-3 years and that means I no longer fit into my favourite skirts and have gone up a couple of sizes. I know that I need to eat healthier and exercise more but being disciplined enough to do it is another matter. If anything, I think my cross-dressing goals - to fit into my smaller sized outfits (and not look 4 months pregnant!) provide more motivation than fitting into my male clothes.

[Maid_Marion]

I think it more about eating reasonable quantities than eating "healthy." Healthy is a buzz word used to sell more expensive products and diets.
I eat and cook tasty food made with fat, salt, and sugar. I cook small portions to limit my calorie intake. I'll often eat candy or ice cream
while I cook, as I have a sweet tooth. I'll also bake and freeze. But, no muffin top here.

[Miss V]

I've always been underweight. It's not really a huge problem with dressing, other than having an almost non-existent ass. And being thin makes you look a bit older than you are.

Where I live, being overweight would actually make you loook more female, since most women here are "big".

[TheHiddenMe]

sorry, but you couldn't be more wrong.

there are three basic macronutrients; fat, carbohydrates and protein.
they each have a profoundly different hormonal effect on your digestion.

i've been losing weight at a rate of about 10lbs/month for the past 4-5 months.
i have mainly been following the teaching/ lectures/ guidelines of two people.

Dr Robert Lustig on sugar/ processed food.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmC4Rm5cpOI
Dr Jason Fung on diet/ fasting, understanding the 2 compartment problem.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIuj-oMN-Fk

Well, if I'm wrong, then the science is wrong.

Because every study of diets shows that NONE of them work any better than any other.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.vox.com/platform/amp/2015/10/29/9639982/low-fat-high-protein-diet

Diet fadists like the ones you cite have a vested interest in pushing their theories, generally books to sell (which is why there are thousands of diet books). So their regimes are long on anecdote and short on evidence.

If you eat less sugar, you eat less empty calories. That's all.

Our bodies, because of hereditary reasons (we evolved from cave people) could eat lots of different stuff and make it work.

The science is on my side, not yours.

[Rhonda Jean]

Well, I've gained weight, but like a lot of other things that I thought would stop my dressing, it hasn't!

Let's see, I also thought:

Getting married
Having kids
Getting older
Thinning hair
Cutting my hair
Getting a new girlfriend
Having grandkids
Not being able go pass
A better job
More money
Living in the "right" neighborhood
Stuffy friends and neighbors
Working in an ultra-conservative business
Religion
Growing out of it
Getting tired of it

You get the point. I'm a lifer.

[myrrhlynn]

....

The science is on my side, not yours.

hard for me to believe the results i have gotten are based on science fiction.
other than severely cutting sugar, including fructose, i follow nobody's diet plan, only the times i eat.

Jason Fung and Robert Lufkin sell nothing but an idea.
follow the age-old diet recipe of "eat less & move more" and you will eventually fail.

[Devi SM]

ThehiddenMe,
I think that in part you're right like all diets in part are right but at the end of the day they are yoyo diets. People soon or later comes back to gain weight and in most of the cases the gain is bigger than the loss.

I'd been on Keto for 7 years. I have to say that Keto is a life style and the real one is not only what you but now you sleep, the amount of exercise and more things than just calories, fat or protein.
It has worked but as a proof that is not simple mathematics since I began on HRT I have to change and adjust my eating habits as well sleep and other things that at the end of the day have a huge influence on your body. Women's body are different than men's body. Age is another factor.
Some people without any malfunction in the system don't gain weight easily but others are like captures of fat.

I've been a climber, hiker in the highest tops of the world, yes Everest included and in those day the knowledge was a lot of calories needed, so a lot of pasta and sugar but today I can testify by myself that is wrong way.
You can eat no sugar at all, that's the ideal and natural way, and have a lot of calories from fat and proteins only.
As I said every body is different as every preference is different. There are men that love a curvy thick over weighted woman while others prefer the thin and like under famine women, as well other like "normal, ones.

If you want to have hips and tighs as a woman it must be some overweight in contrast of the waist needed, so this is very complicated and my finally word is that you do whatever to feel comfortable with yourself, diet, no diet, fat, slim etc, there's beauty on everything just be hapoy...

[Tracii G]

A lot of truth in your words Vanessa if you are happy and healthy at whatever weight then its all good.

[Michaelasfun]

My mantra here is just to learn your sizing from the places you buy from so it looks as good as possible. Not a size 0 here, but you can find nice stuff that fits you and look as good as you can. I don’t let it stop me ;)

[TheHiddenMe]

hard for me to believe the results i have gotten are based on science fiction.
other than severely cutting sugar, including fructose, i follow nobody's diet plan, only the times i eat.

Science, not science fiction. And the science behind weight loss is not science fiction. The idea that someone has a secret diet that works IS fiction.

If you cut sugar from your diet (especially processed sugar, like that in junk foods), you are cutting calories from your intake. If you consume less calories than you burn, you lose weight.


Jason Fung and Robert Lufkin sell nothing but an idea.

Call I call BS?

Jason Fung has five books he has written or co-authored.

Robert Lustig has three books he has written.

So the idea they are selling nothing but ideas is clearly false.

Plus, their professional reputations are fully invested in promoting their ideas.

Besides, how can both of these be true?

Fung says the problem is a hormonal imbalance, which fasting can cure (neither idea is supported by scientific studies).

Lustig says sugar--mostly refined added sugar (again, not supported by studies) is the evil, the poison.

So if Fung is right, Lustig has to be wrong--and vice versa.

The much easier answer is BOTH are wrong.

If you eat less sugar, you consume less calories, and lose weight. If you periodically fast, you eat less calories, and lose weight.

The simple answer is the correct answer.


follow the age-old diet recipe of "eat less & move more" and you will eventually fail.

There are some that fail (because they revert to old habits and eat more calories than they burn), but the science remains the same.

Since I retired in 2012, I've lost about 40 pounds. I know the biggest reason. At work, I was often surrounded by food. Endless food days for birthdays and the like. I had no willpower and could graze all day and eat 1,000 to 1,500 calories in junk food. I was also sitting in a car two hours a day, besides 8+ hours at a desk. Now I try not to buy junk food, and I'm a lot more active. But I can be active and overeat and put on weight, and the only time I can truly lose weight is when I make a conscious effort to control what I eat and create a calorie deficit.


I'd been on Keto for 7 years. I have to say that Keto is a life style and the real one is not only what you but now you sleep, the amount of exercise and more things than just calories, fat or protein. It has worked but as a proof that is not simple mathematics since I began on HRT I have to change and adjust my eating habits as well sleep and other things that at the end of the day have a huge influence on your body. Women's body are different than men's body. Age is another factor. Some people without any malfunction in the system don't gain weight easily but others are like captures of fat.

As you say, there is a lot involved to a regime which includes life style. There is no scientific proof a keto (high fat) regime is better than a high-carb diet. The proof does not exist. It may "work" for you, but there is no scientific proof behind the curtain of the claims.

This blog entry at this website pretty well sums up what I am trying to say. If you are interested, give it a read. Especially look at the second chart. It gives the name of six popular diets, a short-hand description of each diet, followed by "By creating a caloric deficit" in the How it Works column for each diet.

https://www.myoleanfitness.com/cico-evidence-based-truth/

CICO is Calories In, Calories Out. It is what matters in weight loss. Everything else is just marketing.

[Devi SM]

ThehiddenMe,
I don't know where you want arrive. That you have all the truth and knowledge based on the books you had read is very wrong. As a sample you mention just one of the tendencies of keto. As I said, and repeat it again, keto is more than the carbs or no carbs, fat, kind of fat, proteins amount or kind of, is a life style that include many other elements. I mention some, have you heard a out blue light, insulin, HGH, fat liver, etc? You say that's very simple to eat less calories that you burn. If you do that you start eating muscle tissue because the last of the reserves the body eat when starving is the fat tissue.
As you see, it's very hard to have the only recipe, because there are recipes as human beings are. It's be really naive to think that my knowledge is good for everybody and the rest is wrong.
Science about human being and diets is in diapers. Some years ago it was a true fact that eggs were dangerous for cholesterol, today is a proven error. Years ago they showed up with vegetable oil, today is a know carcinogen when used in some ways, just to mention that the called science is just attempts to explain the process called metabolism. Hormones play a huge role in diet as well other elements as potassium, sodium and magnesium just to mention some.

You can keep discussing trying to show other's error or misconceptions but all we are really watering our feet in the ocean of knowledge about health where even Doctors, no Mds, are trying to float without sink....

What works for me probably won't work for you. As you said, for your work environment, you didn't have the power to care about what you eat. That never has been a problem for me so your limited knowledge wasn't applied to me. Today my job is completely different. I'm self employed starting my own business and I have fully control on what I eat. That should give me advantage to control the weight but I have a different element in my body that completely changes my scenario. Now I need some fat to redistribute and specific exercise no to burn but to give shape without produce muse tissue ut jeep the ones I have.

To end this absurd discussion, we can present our ideas, concepts, experiences but no call others wrong because they haven't read the books you have read.