Do you pass - as a man?

[Gemma Rhodes]

Hi Girls,

This question was posed on another forum and brought some very interesting answers so I thought I would ask it here.

We TGs worry a lot about passing in our female roles. But have you stopped to think how well you pass as a male?

When in drab do you "conform" to all the usual male traits or not? ie sports, beer, womanising, cars, DIY etc etc

Gemma xx

[HaleyPink2000]

Actually I get called Ma'am even in drab clothing at stores etc. I don't know why. I have even gone into a Walmart in Camo top to bottom and been called Ma'am. Shopping for kids toys for christmas a lady and her child in the store called me Ma'am as they did pardon themselves while passing in the isle.

So no I don't or must not be passing in my male role very well. It's very evident to me when I take off my hat that I have hair missing from my age.
But while wearing a hat many must just look at my body shape and that I don't have an adams apple and think I'm female.

Even in service it was that way. People saying things about " your build like a girl " or "You have a womans ass".

For me thats ok! I'd rather look like a woman anyway.
But I do love my male side also.

[Yes I am]

Hi Girls,

This question was posed on another forum and brought some very interesting answers so I thought I would ask it here.

We TGs worry a lot about passing in our female roles. But have you stopped to think how well you pass as a male?

When in drab do you "conform" to all the usual male traits or not? ie sports, beer, womanising, cars, DIY etc etc

Gemma xx

Not all men are beer-guzzling, womanizing sports' fans. I don't do these things, I am a man, and yes I do love to crossdress.

[Tiffy]

Pass as a man? For sure 200% And no, I still have male traits even dressed:sad:

Kisses, April Marie

[Gemma Rhodes]

Not all men are beer-guzzling, womanizing sports' fans. I don't do these things, I am a man, and yes I do love to crossdress.

I know that, but this is the stereotypical male image, whether right or wrong!!

[Yes I am]

I know that, but this is the stereotypical male image, whether right or wrong!!

It's crap though, I reject these stereotypes. Being a man has nothing to do with drinking beer, watching sports or acting like a pig towards the opposite sex, or even cars.

[Annaliese]

When I was young I used to play with the dolls with the girl next door. Then I got teased by some boys, I stop playing with dolls and started geting in fight all the time so I would not be called a girl.

I use to put a lot of effort in to conforming to that male image of sports, beer and womanising and all it did was make me un happy. In high school all I wanted to do was be friends with the girls, but because I was trying so hard to be the big man geting in fights and drinking hard(all the time hiding my dressing). The girls thought I was an Ass hole and the boys thought I was a prick. I had a 30 year class reunion a few years back and one of my class mate commented on what a ass hole I was in high school and how bad I had treated her she still had bad feeling towards me, she was also the girl I played dolls with when I was younger. I regert that time in my live for being a coward and not just being the person I was.

Thanks for this Thread

Anna

[Casey Morgan]

Good question Gemma. Thank you.

I try very hard to pass as a man. Sure, some of it comes naturally. But there's always been a part of me that kicks in and says "better not do that" when I start getting away from that "ideal". Like just now when I Googled for the song that starts "tell me why you're crying my son". ("Day Is Done", I know the Peter Paul & Mary version) just typing those six words already has me misty-eyed. And that little voice is saying "shut up, shut up, shut up". And I mentioned in another thread that I think the Kremlin building lit up at night looks pretty. Or is that "architecturally and asthetically pleasing"? :D

As to the things you mentioned, some I enjoy and some I don't. I like sports and beer. But I hate DIY, mostly because I hate getting grease and grime on me. And I could never be a "player".

So as I said, I have to work at passing. I've got the look down but if I "slip up" there's some clues that suggest all is not as simple as it seems.

[Kathleengurl]

That's a great point. Sometimes.. I've tried to dress like a woman trying to pass as a man. It helps me to feel more fem even while in 'drab-ish'.
-k-

[EricaCD]

I would guess that nearly every single person I know (other than my wife) would be genuinely shocked to find out I am a CD. I do not have any noticeable feminine affectations or traits when in drab. Which, of course, makes learning to pass that much more difficult :(

[Laurie Ann]

I would have to second Ericas comments.

[DonnaT]

Yep, I pass as a man even when dressed :cool:

[Reana]

Yep, I pass as a man even when dressed :cool:

Donna, I don't know whether that's true or not but it's a very cute reply.

For myself, I feel I pass very well as a male. And, I even do some of those other things ( some beer, limited sports, especially cars) but never the "pig" thing. No one will ever know or suspect any more than I care to show or tell. That having been said, I'm so open and candid that most persons would have to do no more than ask. The older I get the less I care who knows. :D

[christine55]

When I was doing telephone customer support I was surprised by how often I got called Maam or Miss. My voice is not feminine. I am sure it was my manner of dealing with the clients, not agressive, trying to help them etc.
Hugs, Christine

[Lissa Stevens]

I don't "pass" as a man, I am a man. There is no doubt when endrab what I am, as there is no doubt enfemme that I am still a man. I have dressed as long as I can remember. It is as much a part of me as watching sports, fishing, hunting and yes the occasional beer.

[Katrina]

I pass as a guy when in drab. While I'm not a big sports guy, womanizer, or other things, I like beer and DIY stuff. I think my shapely eyebrows are starting to make me look more fem and of course, my tight jeans too.

[Deborah]

I tried asking this question along time ago and got the same amount of flak over what i was trying to say. :rolleyes:

Back on topic though..... no i don't have any of the stereotypical traits.

[Teresa Amina]

Great thread! You learn to get by as a man even if you've got that part of you that isn't. Go along to get along has always been a good survival technique but of course there is that Teresa Me that winces occaisionally at some of it.

[Jodi Lynn]

I have been called ma'am a few times when in drab, and I almost allways get mistaken for female on the phone.

[suzanne claire]

I pass as a man .As a professional my attire needs to project a certain male image. While I am only 5 feet 7inches and not overweight, I do look like a male whenever I am dressed as such.However it is so much more fun to be dressed as a real girl.:D

[Maria2004]

I've always passed as a man, unless I wore shorts and no shirt, then I got a little ribbing for being so thin, which has payed off since I discovered I was CD, apparently I "pass" as a female when dressed, which is ironic since I used to be obsessed with passing but no longer care if I do or don't.

[Adrienne Heels]

I pass as a guy....like beer and sports.....even though I was 81% feminine when I took that test on the internet the other day.

I actually have to work on my walk and mannerisms to look more fem.

Karyn

[Rachel Morley]

When in drab do you "conform" to all the usual male traits or not? ie sports, beer, womanising, cars, DIY etc etc
Sports...no (except for golf, I hate nearly all sports)
Beer...no (I prefer wine)
cars...no (I am interested in them, but mostly I use them to get to work and that's all)
womanizing.....NO. I never have and never will.
DIY...I can if I have to, but I'd rather not. (I usually pay someone else to do it).

Also I have been mistaken for a women en homme a couple of times when I've been dressed in "feminized male mode". :)

[Mona]

I've learned to pass as a man very well, sports, beer, drag racing, but I have maintained a sensitivity and caring more than my fellow males, and I have to be careful about expressing my femininity when en drab.

[carson]

Hi Girls,

This question was posed on another forum and brought some very interesting answers so I thought I would ask it here.

We TGs worry a lot about passing in our female roles. But have you stopped to think how well you pass as a male?

When in drab do you "conform" to all the usual male traits or not? ie sports, beer, womanising, cars, DIY etc etc

Gemma xx

I don't swill beer, I don't watch sports on TV and I am definately not a womanizer. But at 6'3", 195lbs, weathered face at 44yrs and still benching 300lbs at the gym...yeah, I look like a guy when in drab. I even look like a guy en femme. And I like guns, cigars and expensive scotch. But I do think I look pretty good in my feminine persona although, as Dustin Hoffman said of Tootsie, "I just wish I were prettier." :GE:

[Billijo49504]

Red neck, white sock and blue ribbon beer. OK, I lied, Canadian whiskey for me, and I think I pass as a man. I'm a factory rat, and I fit in. If they only knew???BJ

[Ibuki_Warpetal]

I pass as male (usually), but not as a "man".

I don't do manly things or act hard.

[Bridget]

Yeah, but people do see me as somewhat eccentric. I mean, I insist on doing everything myself, from fixing my bike to cooking. Typical masculine thing to do. I'm big on DIY. I play lots of video games, like most of my male college peers. I dress, more or less, like a lot of other males, with the exception of wearing better fitting pants, or occasionally girl jeans.

And through a lot of my high school, everyone came to me with their problems and i lent a listening ear, and sort of did my best to bandage the wounded in a social sense. I cook a lot. More than most girls here actually, so I'm not sure if that counts. I get slightly more emotionally perturbed by things, but it may just be that as a culture, males are simply made to repress their emotions.

So honestly, i don't know.

[Cathy Anderson]

When in drab do you "conform" to all the usual male traits or not? ie sports, beer, womanising, cars, DIY etc etc
What about guns and rasslin'? :)

> I know that, but this is the stereotypical male image, whether right or wrong!!

It's a stereotype. It's a male stereotype. But I wouldn't agree that it is *the* male stereotype.

I've noticed this issue in several different posts lately and would like to comment on it.

It seems like there's a tendency to equate all manner of "boorish" and negative male traits as being the essential male attributes. If that's so *no wonder people want to be women*.

But I absolutely do not think it's true. This would be like defining women in terms of the worst female traits: weak, gossipy, fickle, vain, etc.

I can't help but think that this narrow and overly negative view of maleness is related to CDing for some. Hence my thread and new web page on positive male role models.

Anyway, back to your question. Yes, I pass as a male. But no, I don't display any of the traits you mention. But I don't know what DIY is--if it means "do it yourself", yes I'm that way.

Cathy

[Wenda]

As many of the others have posted, I dont like the negative stereotypes of the beer swilling, thoughtless, sloppy, smelly, clueless assole guy. When I am in normal mode, nobody would consider that I have feminine traits. When did this business of being a guy gives you license to be a jerk emerge.

[Joy Carter]

Well I help around the house, I garden, take her shopping enjoy long talks (IM) with a girlfriend from high school. Have a vintage Chevy that I work on my self had two motorcycles (sold them). Will DIY when I have to, watch guy stuff on TV. But when streesed I remark to myself "Why The Hell Wasn't I Born A Woman ?" But alass I do pass as a man whilst in drab, yuck!

[HaleyPink2000]

Actually I'd hope I pass a femme even in male mode. Or at least that I would look to others like I might not be a male, keeping them guessing would be best for me. Like I said even in drab.

So, I'd rather be enfemme most of the time. After next week it will be easier as I am going to retire on the 31st. Woo hooo!
Home alone most of the days of the week.

[Alex R]

Yes I pass as a man, basically I suppose 'cos I am one and like doing "typical" male things like having a beer, watching football and all that stuff.

That, however doesn't make me macho, or an mcp, or uncaring, want to play away or show any other less than favourable traits that is often unfortunately seen by some males as being expected behaviour.

I've really just started dressing seriously in the last few months but still enjoy as much as always the male things.

I'm just over six feet, weigh 200 lbs and have to admit that passing as a woman would be difficult. But then I don't feel I actually want to pass as a woman, it's just that I like dressing like one.

No harm in that is there?

[Monica Elena]

Yes I pass.
I think I am a good male impersonator.:)

[Toni Shelton]

I have tried to be a beer drinking, pick-up driving, womanizing, welder type. It didn't work. My wife and I had problems, my kids hated me, and people didn't want to be around me.
All that didn't work, I still wanted to crossdress. I wanted to be me and didn't know how.
The last year or so since I told my wife I had to dress or die, has been wonderful. For the first time in my life I know who I am and want to continue living life as Toni. I do all the laundry, cooking, making of the beds, i.e. housework, in our home. My SO calls me her little housewife and I Love It.
Life is WONDERFUL now that I know who I am

Love
Toni

PS; I am not a very good male impersonator.
I Love to shop, and am not going to change.

[Kieron Andrew]

dunno gemma youve met me??? do i???

[Katiegirl]

Yes I pass as a man I think, however I don't drink a great deal, I am not keen on Sports but keep up todate with the soccer & cricket scores, so people think I do. I keep my home clean & tidy and I prefer the company of women to men.

Several women have commented that I am not like other men so I do wonder if they suspect I have a very strong female side to me.

:)

[Kathi-Anne]

I have to say that I pass as a man. I am 6'4" and weigh 225-230 Lbs and also bench 300 at the gym. My shoulders are too wide to pass as a female. My legs are another story.

[Karen Edmonton]

In drab , NO one would know that I crossdress . But I don't act the stereotypical male either. I think most people who know me just think of me as a nice guy that thinks of others first .

[MsEva]

Balance, ladies..balance...I pass without a doubt as a man. I think I can even pass (if the lighting is right..hehe) as a woman. I think we all have male and female traits..that is part of being human. I drink beer, watch sports, but can cry at chick movies without trying...it is not easy being me..or us.0.02

[_Janelle_]

I would guess that nearly every single person I know (other than my wife) would be genuinely shocked to find out I am a CD. I do not have any noticeable feminine affectations or traits when in drab. Which, of course, makes learning to pass that much more difficult :(

I right there with Erica - Anyone that knows me would be pretty stunned, I would think, to find out that I crossdress. I have some of the typical male stuff - I watch sports on occasion but can take it or leave it. I would much rather drink good red wine than beer, but I still like a beer with the right food. I don't womanise and never did. I have what some might call a forceful personality - I tend to think that I know how to do something better than anyone else - its also called a driver personality. I like working on cars and driving fast.
That having been said, I never felt comfortable around a bunch of guys, being guys as it were. I always felt I didn't quite fit in for some reason. I think I know why now!! :D
I can listen and watch someone's mannerisms and then reflect that person back at them and that seems to work well to schmooze people, although other times I couldn't give a crap what others think.

[Jesse69]

I definitely pass as a male, and if people don't know any bad gossip about me they think I'm a "dude." I'm only into road biking as a sport, and I don't watch sports much. I also don't like beer and I don't go to bars. When I talked about how some women like sissies at work my coworker said I'm definitely not a sissy and am a real man. Jeez - my coworkers don't know I'm a crossdressor with a major fetish - like I have over 40 skirt suits! I used to be quite a dude but crossdressing ruined that.

Only once at a McDonalds did a lady ask a man - "Is that a man?" - When she was referring to me. She probably knows through gossip that I buy a lot of womens clothes.

[JeanneF]

I'm kind of a 50/50 mix. Quite a few of my guy friends tease me about things like my highlighted hair (and various other "metrosexual" tendencies), love of shopping, willingness to watch "chick" stuff like Sex and the City or Bridget Jones, and fairly feminine mannerisms in general, but at the same time i'm very into cars and motorcycles, a rabid football fan, a beer drinker (real beer...not Bud Light), gun collector (vintage shotguns, mostly), etc...typical guy things. The friends of mine who know about Lisa have mostly said they weren't exactly surprised, but actually they would have guessed more likely that I was gay.

[Felicity]

I ignored this thread for a long time, but I decided to look into it.

Who believes in stereotypes anymore anyway? Isn’t that being a bit Neanderthal? I pass just fine as a man on a day to day life. I let myself shed a tear without embarrassment when watching a tear jerker and most women appreciate that. I may be a crossdresser, but I love women. The only homosexual tendencies I have is wondering what sex is like for women. Since it is impossible with today’s technology for me to ever actually know, when it comes to sex, I’m perfectly happy being male.

I am one that visits strip clubs from time to time. Over the years, I have become friend with some dancers. One of them even knows of my crossdressing and we have played dress up on several occasions. I have even taken some exotic dancers to Cathie’s (http://yellowpages.superpages.com/profile~SRC_com411~N_cathie%27s~STYPE_S~T_Portland ~S_OR~Z_~CID_99999999990~LID_ms1LP3IbFQTCARwMtssXp Q%3D%3D.htm) to buy them hot dancewear. I am known to buy stuff for women there and I buy stuff for myself from time to time too, including hot shoes!

I am happy being male, I just like to enjoy some things women enjoy too. Until my shaved legs and underarms are revealed, As far as I know I am seen as a male. Very few people know I crossdress. I do not try to pass as a woman as I don’t want to be a woman. If somehow, I could become 100% female, and I mean a real female. No surgery, hormone treatments, etc, I would consider that. However, if such a reversal was possible, it could be reversed too, should I change my mind!

[crusadergirl]

Yes I pass as A man but i don't worry about that stuff b/c i am just me The sexy Crusadergirl I am loved by all

[Kimberly]

<--- camp GM

To put it bluntley - no I don't conform, and I don't want to!