attraction feelings

[JaniceP]

Hi Girls.

When we/you are totally dressed from skin out( PRETTY LINGERIE ETC.) in the cutest Girly Feminine outfit. Being a Hetro Male--After dressing and feeling so totally Feminine, could see yourself surrendering to the advances of a totally nice male?:brolleyes:

[Vickii*]

Hi there Janice!!!

I am totally the same way. I'm starting to feel like maybe I might be bisexual, and that's okay! :)

[docrobbysherry]

Most of us have or have had that fantasy, Janice. But, most of us arent attracted to men. Just the fantasy of being a sexy woman with a man.:battingeyelashes:

Personally, I surrender to that impulse quite often. However, I'm the man who gets to be with Sherry!:D

[Micki_Finn]

Chances are it’s all just fantasy. As someone who is genuinely bisexual, I can tell you that there is a HUGE difference between having fantasies or watching pornography, and real bisexuality.

[Tracii G]

You are having a fantasy more than likely.
Ponder this question if you were in that situation would you actually act on it? Be honest now.
You are in it hot and heavy with the guy would you be repulsed because you are with another male doing the dirty deed?
90% of hetro CDers would actually run from that situation.
If you are wondering if you are Bi or gay then probably not and you are in fantasy land.
I know I am gay there is no doub't in my mind.

[Robertacd]

No, as much as I feel like I "should be" and have even fantasized about it. I can honestly say that DRAG or DRAB I am not sexually attracted to GM's.

[Teresa]

Janice ,
Not really but I would love to have a GG companion but then I'm not fully a hetro male .

I had to think for a moment exactly how I do feel , it doesn't feel like CDing anymore , I'm not saying I feel cutley feminine , it's easier to say I don't feel male , I just feel totally comfortable as Teresa . Saying that I'm not one for surrendering easliy to anyone , getting where I am now has been tough , I can afford to be picky now !

[Micki_Finn]

I’m going to add that no woman should ever “surrender” to advances, nor should a man attempt to make a woman. Being with someone should be a woman’s conscious choice, not something that she’s pestered, pressured, or bullied into.

[deebra]

Traci G, you said if you are wondering you probialy are not. Try this. Like JaniceP said you are totally dressed and you can feel the sexy lingerie that makes you feel veeeerrry feminine what's to say you might just decide to take advantage of the opportunity and decide to perform like a woman and you find out you like it. You like what you did to the guy and liked doing it as a woman, it made you feel more womanly and so good you want to do it again. You have just found out that you aren't totally hetro but bi. Didn't all women have to try it the first time, nearly all of them like it, why not JaniceP.

Teresa you said you are not fully a hetro male, I take that to mean if this guy comes along one night and the two of you really click and he leans over and kisses you, touches you knee below where your skirt is and you feeling like a woman I think you will willing want to go further. Under the right conditions especially fully dressed CD's going further would just be a chance to feel more womanly validating that you are to a large degree a woman and not just a CD.

[Robertacd]

Deebra there is a big difference between fantasy and reality. As I said I have fantasized about this, but I know me and I know I could never go through with it in reality.

Tracii is right, if there is any question in your mind then you are probably not.

[Micki_Finn]

Deebra,

No, not all women have tried bisexuality and no, “nearly all” didn’t like it. I know far more women who have tried it and decided it wasn’t for them, or simply never tried it. This is just male fantasy that women are all canoodling behind closed doors.

So what if there’s some example of a man experimenting with bisexuality. Even if it weren’t purely rhetorical as yours was, it doesn’t disprove Tracii’s statement of “if you’re wondering, then probably not.

Finally, you imply that ANY crossdresser, given the right conditions, would engage sexually with a man. Sorry hon, again your fantasies are taking over and you need to look at reality.

[Tracii G]

Deebra you are projecting what YOU think women do and you do fantasize quite a bit in your posts.
Not to mention you have a few fetishes too.
Fetishes are OK so don't get me wrong.
If you have to question if you are gay or bisexual then there is a problem because if there is one thing you do know is your sexual preference.

[Jodie_Lynn]

WOW, somebody has been watching too much porn.

Didn't all women have to try it the first time, nearly all of them like it,

Perhaps I hang out with the wrong crowd, but of all the cis-women I know, only one has professed to 'kissing a girl and liking it", but she was a lesbian, and knew it since grade school.

Contrary to popular belief(and the fervid dreams of porn producers), women DO NOT put on sexy lingerie and have sensual pillow fights before falling into each others arms in lust as soon as the boys are gone.


Like many, when dressed as a male, I had no inclination for any intimacy with males. It wasn't until my first romantic encounter with a man, dressed as Jodie, that I discovered that I liked men. I mean, I really, liked men! :o So I suppose you could categorize me as gay, but, since I consider myself a transwoman, does that label really apply?

I'm not being judgmental, but for all the girls who wonder "What would it be like...?", all I can say is: be careful, you may find that you aren't as hetero as you think....

[deebra]

Micki-Finn, , I was not saying women had sex with other women and became lesbians.
Jodie's 5th paragraph says the same thing I said and it "turned her". Her 6th paragraph says exactly what I meant.
Jodie having tried and found out doesn't that make your life so much better? Suppose you hadn't tried, look at the pleasure "as a woman" you would be missing
Janice P, if the above described opportunity comes along are you going to give it a try, a lot of good advise above to think about.

[Jenny22]

After several good get togethers with a man I found to be very nice to me (I'm TG), and a romantic encounter was suggested by him, my fantasies could well become realities.

[Judy-Somthing]

No, when I was in my late teens a few male friends wanted to do me while I was dressed.
I'm just so addicted to females!

[Susan Smokes]

I had to leave my fantasy, the urges became to strong, and I needed to know what I might be missing out on. I reached a point when I did not care If I was bi, so I surrendered to another Crossdresser. I will keep this PG, and just say, It was great, and I have no regrets. Sometimes you just have to leave you comfort zone, and try new things. Try It you just might like It!

[Diane Smith]

I am completely turned off by the thought of performing any sexual act with a male. Every one of us is different, though. I have no problem if Deebra wants to try it, but please don't assume we all share your fantasies.

- Diane

[Becoming Brianna]

For me it's all emotional. I don't really respond to physical cues that much. I need to have a bond and be in love and see a relationship that's going somewhere before I think about it. I've had feelings for men and for women but how I feel about the person is so much more important than anything else. I don't know what that makes me. I always felt that if I had a preference it would be for women but as I have begun exploring my gender identity and expression the idea of being with a man has entered my head much more consistently than before. It doesn't really matter because the Genesis of my exploration isn't really sexual in nature. I just want my partner to love me for me. Right now I'm with a beautiful woman and I think I have that kind of love (I still haven't talked to her about my most recent foray into self discovery I prefer to have the conversation face to face in a few days) so I'm happy. I love her so much and really don't want to lose her so I hope she accepts me.

[docrobbysherry]

I've been with a few clean cut, slim, young guys. And, they were VERY attentive and flattering! And, I'd had a few drinks. Could I have made out with them? Probably. But, could I have felt them up or vice versa? NO! Because I'm NOT attracted to male parts!:doh:
That's how u tell, deebra. If you're NOT attracted to male parts u AREN'T going to enjoy going down on a man, PERIOD!:straightface:


Micki-Finn, I meant the CD tried oral sex on the guy, I was not saying women had sex with other women and became lesbians.
Jodie's 5th paragraph says the same thing I said and it "turned her". Her 6th paragraph says exactly what I meant.
Jodie having tried and found out doesn't that make your life so much better? Suppose you hadn't tried, look at the pleasure "as a woman" you would be missing
Janice P, if the above described opportunity comes along are you going to give it a try, a lot of good advise above to think about.

[Majella St Gerard]

Depending on the man, I will flirt and let them touch me byt I'm up front about my sexuality and what is not going to happen. But it is fun. But I kinda get off on it. And I don't consider myself to be bisexual. Taboo sex is a turn on. To me anyway.

[Beverley Sims]

When I was twenty, I flirted with guys with the encouragement of my girlfriends, but it was generally hands off and keep your distance.

A couple of passionate embraces were fun at the time.

[DaisyLawrence]

And I wonder why the general population think all crossdressers are pervs. Deebra, I've said it before and I'll say it again, why oh why do you not just open an account at one of those 'private' sites where everyone else is just like you and just enjoy yourself instead of pratting about on a publically open site like this tarring anyone with gender identity issues with your own fantasy brush? Fetlife comes to mine, I believe that is private.

[deebra]

Doc I take you at your word you are not attracted to male parts, however you also say when you try new things even if they are out of your comfort zone you may experience new excitement and growth that you never expected. Sounds like you have never tried it so you don't know. Several members have said the same thing until they tried it, liked it and now find it to be very enjoyable especially when dressed as a woman. I do watch transsexual porn, most are very very good at it and you can learn how to be good at it and it turns you in the direction that it's no different for a CD to do this than a GG. Everyone has to try new things for the first time, it may not be great but it gets a little better the second time and then it's something you want and dressed as and presenting as a woman makes it no different than a GG doing the same thing. Kinda like smoking or eating brocelli, after trying it several time you like it. CD's first learning to do this is no different than GG's first learning to do this. I do accept that not everyone enjoys smoking or brocelli no matter how much they try. If you are wondering the answer is yes, I was invited over a friends house one night, dressed, drove over and being dressed and fulfilling the role as a woman took CDing to a whole new level... to feeling as much like a woman as you possibly could.

[BrendaPDX]

Fantasy, maybe; reality probably not.

[Nikki A.]

Not attracted to males in either mode. So I guess that makes me a hetero male lesbian?

[sometimes_miss]

could see yourself surrendering to the advances of a totally nice male?:brolleyes:
Nope. I'm heterosexual. If you can 'see yourself' being attracted to a 'totally nice male', then you're either gay or bisexual. Not that there's anything wrong with that!
I'm just always amazed that there are so many guys here who think that they are 'totally straight', yet admit that 'when dressed as a girl', only then do they find themselves attracted to, and fantasizing about having sex or a romantic relationship of some kind with a man.

[Teresa]

Deebra,
I'm trying to avoid using the term male lesbian but that is how I feel inside , so I would only relate to a GG under those circumstances . OK I admit some members of my social group are making their intentions obvious , there is very mild interplay but nothing that would upset other people in public , my brain just isn't wired that way to relate to another guy no matter how he is dressed .

While I prefer not to say too much but I've seen some members regret the few minutes of experimentation afterwards , some friendships have been totally ruined .

[Tracii G]

Deebra its broccoli.
Porn is just disgusting to me and it makes me think why does some one spend hours watching it?
Is it they have no sex life? Spouse has cut them off? Have fantasies that rule their every waking moment?
Maybe I am too old fashion and the word love actually means something.

[Di]

This topic comes up ALOT!
So having a discussion is a good thing.:)
To most of you keeping it pg - I thank you for remembering this is a support forum for family and friends as well.
To those who keep posting their point of view repeatedly including salacious comments . KNOCK it off .

[Tracy Irving]

It doesn't matter how nice he is, I have never been attracted to a man. This view doesn't change with what I am wearing.

[Teresa]

Tracii,
I do belive that is the crux of the subject , it's not love but purely sex . People in loving relationships don't need the World and it's neighbour to know !

[Becoming Brianna]

I think a lot of this boils down to security in identity and the fragility of masculinity far too many possess. I think more people fit more towards the middle of the sexuality continuum and that of masculinity and femininity than would like to admit it and CDing for some provides the protection and almost the social permission to express and act on those thoughts both sexual and non-sexual. I have had romantic feelings for both genders both when I identified strictly as male and tried to suppress any thoughts of potential transition or feminine expression in any form and now that I'm exploring the real me to see where I actually fit. My journey isn't sexual it's a quest for truth and authenticity to find out who exactly the real me is and what she needs. All I know is that even though I prefer women if I ever do end up with a male partner any shame I may have felt in that is gone and I can thank letting go of the rigidity of what everyone saw me as and wanted me to be for that. I'm still in the process of accepting myself and figuring out what exactly it is that I need to accept and I have a long way to go but I'm on my way and that makes me happy.

[Tracii G]

Like its been said before many here claim to be straight but are really not but just haven't admitted it to themselves.
How wearing womens clothes somehow magically makes them bi or whatever.No no it doesn't.
I don't buy that for one second just wearing a dress makes you want to submit to a man sexually.
One may fantasize about it but thats it.
If you are bi or gay you just know it from a very early age.If you are straight you wouldn't understand it because you don't know the feeling.

[LydiaL]

I admit to having fantasies of attracting a man or another CDer while dressed. If that means I tend towards Bi, so be it.

But it is unlikely that anything will ever come of such feelings for me.

[Becoming Brianna]

Suppression is a powerful force. I'm not saying that dressing as a woman makes someone bi or gay. If someone's gay bi or trans then they always were. But many factors (family reaction social cost among others) can force someone to suppress those desires in an attempt to be "perfect" or at least "normal" The acceptance of the need to CD can be for these people that true self coming out just like how seeing oneself as a woman for the first time can help a trans person realize that it's more than clothes or sex but a reflection of who they really are. For a gay or bi CD it's probably not that same deep connection with themselves so much as a conduit or tool to help them accept their sexuality as it always was. No magic. Just acceptance. Most of what I've just typed here is speculative because I don't have a lot of experience outside my assigned gender yet but I imagine that these words may hold some validity. It's the only way I can rationalize this phenomenon of people "only being attracted to men when CDing" but perhaps I'm way off base here.

[Cheshire girl]

It’s flattering to be found attractive by men but that’s as far as it goes for me.

[Leslie Mary S]

I have read all the post to this point and went back to the OP post. My answer is NO. I have no desires to be a woman. I just like the cloths, shoes, make-up etc. I find that I do not even have a desire to have a relationship even in drab. The last time I was in a relationship it was great but my SO (were I got the name Mary from) died. With that all sexual desires left.
Now I am thinking of dropping the "Mary" portion of my name and just be "Leslie Shy".

[Gina_83]

For me my CDing is a very special thing I share with my wife, so no, I don't think crossdressing has anything to do with being attracted to the same sex. I think if one is attracted to the same sex, or both sexes, then that would present whether one was dressed or not.

[Jodie_Lynn]

>>SNIP<<
Sounds like you have never tried it so you don't know. Several members have said the same thing until they tried it, liked it and now find it to be very enjoyable especially when dressed as a woman.

But not everyone finds that they enjoy it. I know several CD's who 'gave it ago', and found out that they really didn't like it. And that's absolutely fine. Not everyone has the same tastes or desires. I say this because I don't want to support your position that the "D" is magical and will make every CD into a bi-/gay individual.


I do watch transsexual porn, most are very very good at it and you can learn how to be good at it and it turns you in the direction that it's no different for a CD to do this than a GG. Everyone has to try new things for the first time

No, not everyone has to try new things. Some people are very comfortable with the boundaries they choose not to cross. And to be brutally honest here, it sounds like you may be a teeny-tiny bit uncomfortable knowing that you engage in activities that others don't find appealing. Your attempts to paint every CD/Transperson with the same brush is obvious, and obviously desperate.

I know many girls who will never, ever, engage romantically with a man, even if you held a gun to their head. That is their choice.
I also know girls who were confirmed gay LONG before they ever put on an article of feminine clothing. And some of them have come to realize that they prefer presenting as female, and some have even come to think they were trans.

On these boards, we have a HUGE range of people; from those who only indulge in panty wear, up to people who are in transition and living 24/7. Some folk who have never stepped out of the house (and don't intend to) to folks who are out and in the public eye.

As for myself, I am Transgender. In therapy, and trying to build up the courage to go full time & start HRT. Currently, because of my work situation, this is dicey. I have a BF, who treats me like a woman, and cares for me as Jodie. Since I have boy parts, and he has boy parts, I have no problem accepting the label of "gay". Perhaps, Deebra, you need to discard the porn fantasy, and accept that you are gay. At least until the outside body matches the inner mind.


An aside, and food for thought:
Talking to my ex-wife, when she pointed out that, with male genitals, anytime I am with a man, it is gay sex. I had to agree, but asked her: "If I had all the surgeries, hormones, and lived 24/7, would I still be gay?" She replied, honestly, that she didn't know. Thoughts? Opinions?

[Micki_Finn]

Jodie: first of all, don’t worry too much about Deebra. She’s so hot and passable that she’s on another level than the rest of us (or something).

Second, I firmly believe in the principle that trans women ARE women. Therefore, since you are trans, you are a woman, and thus sex with a man for you would be straight sex. Judging by “parts” simply does not work. For example, what about a man who has maybe lost... things... in some sort of accident. Would that mean he has lesbian sexual with women? Or women who have been circumcised? They don’t have ALL of the female parts so are they genderless?

[Jodie_Lynn]

This topic comes up ALOT!
So having a discussion is a good thing.:)
To most of you keeping it pg - I thank you for remembering this is a support forum for family and friends as well.
To those who keep posting their point of view repeatedly including salacious comments . KNOCK it off .

I sincerely hope I'm not being salacious.
Am I? :sad:

- - - Updated - - -


Jodie: first of all, don’t worry too much about Deebra. She’s so hot and passable that she’s on another level than the rest of us (or something).

Second, I firmly believe in the principle that trans women ARE women. Therefore, since you are trans, you are a woman, and thus sex with a man for you would be straight sex. Judging by “parts” simply does not work. For example, what about a man who has maybe lost... things... in some sort of accident. Would that mean he has lesbian sexual with women? Or women who have been circumcised? They don’t have ALL of the female parts so are they genderless?

I fully agree with you!
I posed the question to some family members: "If a woman had a double mastectomy, and a full hysterectomy, is she still a woman? If a man lost his 'junk', is he still a man?" The answer they gave was "Of course!" I asked 'why?', and they were lost for an answer. I suggested there was a mental component that signaled "I am male/I am female" beyond the physical markers of gender. I think I left them confused.

[HollyGreene]

I have never had any desire to be with a man. Quite the opposite. When I'm dressed, I think about being with women. I guess I'm just a lesbian in a man's body.

[sometimes_miss]

I think more people fit more towards the middle of the sexuality continuum and that of masculinity and femininity than would like to admit it
We have to be careful about statements where we profess that a lot of the population 'OH, look, everyone is really just like ME!', because it's usually just our own insecurity, which is generating wishful thinking in order to feel that we are actually part of the norm.

There's nothing wrong with being different.

[Tracii G]

Good point sometimes miss.
I never understood why people want to be the same as someone else.
Being different is what I strive for.
I was a hippy in the late 60s and while on a "trip" I realized I was just like everyone else,long hair,tye dyed clothes, dirty jeans etc.
The next day I stopped being a follower and decided to be myself and blaze my own trail.

[Lara A]

One thing I have realized in my relatively long time on this earth is that we are all different in some ways, and at the same time we are all very similar. Lots of our stories are similar inasmuch as how we have trodden our paths, but we all tread slightly different paths. That is just the human condition. In these differences are differences of sexuality, how we feel about fellow humans, and there are a whole lot of contributory factors. All I can speak about is my feeling that we are born with certain proclivities that seldom change. I have always felt somewhere in between the gender stereotypes of man and woman, and have been attracted to the male as well as to the female. I have had encounters with men while dressed and not dressed, women while dressed and not dressed, and a lot in between while dressed and not dressed. I have loved all of those encounters, and derived a great deal of satisfaction, both sexual and relational with all of them bar very few. Thank god for diversity and our ability to embrace it :) Let's try not to get wrapped up in pedantics, taboos and denial.

[Michellebrown]

I am attracted to men only

[BTWimRobin]

I think for some it's a balancing act between fantasy vs. reality. A long time ago, I was propositioned by a man and I turned him down. Does that make me straight? Who knows? I have since not been in a similar situation. Sometimes I think I am straight with a few curves. For me, those curves live in my fantasy world where pretty much anything goes. In reality, I love being with and everything about women too much to want to even consider crossing the line. Quite honestly, the only person I want to be with is my wife.

[Lindseynrva]

One thing I have realized in my relatively long time on this earth is that we are all different in some ways, and at the same time we are all very similar. Lots of our stories are similar inasmuch as how we have trodden our paths, but we all tread slightly different paths. That is just the human condition. In these differences are differences of sexuality, how we feel about fellow humans, and there are a whole lot of contributory factors. All I can speak about is my feeling that we are born with certain proclivities that seldom change. I have always felt somewhere in between the gender stereotypes of man and woman, and have been attracted to the male as well as to the female. I have had encounters with men while dressed and not dressed, women while dressed and not dressed, and a lot in between while dressed and not dressed. I have loved all of those encounters, and derived a great deal of satisfaction, both sexual and relational with all of them bar very few. Thank god for diversity and our ability to embrace it :) Let's try not to get wrapped up in pedantics, taboos and denial.

Well said and I too have travelled a similar path. All experiences were mostly good and satisfying for everyone involved. It’s our one life, no dress rehearsal so go live and enjoy it!

[Angie G]

not me I'm 100% lesbian. :hugs:
Angie

[Bobbi46]

I have men friends and women friends but when I see an attractive woman I know which way I am leaning.

[t-girlxsophie]

Jodie: first of all, don’t worry too much about Deebra. She’s so hot and passable that she’s on another level than the rest of us (or something).

Harsh,but true summation :D

[Lovinhose]

Wow, I'm new here but I'm amazed at the comments.If you don't have or haven't had sex with a man while dressed fully as a woman, you don't know what you're missing! It has NOTHING to do with being attracted to the man, but has everything to do with being attracted to the woman you feel like at that moment! Personally I don't get these 'crossdressers' who wear 'women's' jeans and insist they're straight. Why dress if you're just gonna wear jeans, and the label doesn't matter. You don't have to be attracted to the man or his equipment, but when you feel what he does with it, and turns you into a real woman (rhetorically speaking), you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. Some already know what I mean.

As far as being Bi...watching porn or fantasizing about being with a man does not make you Bi, and while actually being with a man while dressed as a woman TECHNICALLY makes you Bi, I don't consider it to be bisexual, as you are emotionally a woman at that moment. Full blown Bi would be if you engage in sex with a man AS a man.

Also, while there ARE straight crossdressers, most who say they're straight are lying to themselves and everyone else. That's fine, many are (unnecessarily) ashamed of it, but when someone decides to be honest with themselves, a whole new world opens up.

[Leslie Mary S]

LovinHose. I am a Straight Cross Dresser. I have no desire for sex with either a man or a woman. I just like the feel of the cloths. I do enjoy going out on rare occurrences all dolled up. I still don't feel the need for sex with a man. To date, no man has hit on me when enfem either but 8 woman have hit on me in drab.
So therefore, you statement that all CDers who are saying they are straight and do no desire a mans relation are lieing is wrong.
I learned a long time ago to never make "absolute Statements" because there is always that one exception that destroys the absoluteness.

[Michellebrown]

Lovinghose

I agree with you 100% i feel the sam

[Michellebej]

When I first started out my public answer was always "NO". No matter how I felt inside. There was no way I would own up to it, especially on a public forum such as this. I often wondered what I would do in a situation where it really happened. When the time came for my first experiance with a man; I never even thought about it. I just did it. As automatically as with a GG. Afterwards there was no second guessing, no guilt, nothing but acceptance that I would be doing this again.

As for women being bisexual. Most of my social circle are GGs. With only a couple of exceptions they have all admitted to either having thoughts of being with a woman or actually being with a woman. Mind you this is not the same as being "bisexual". I just looked this up. Officially less than 2 percent consider themselves bisexual. Yet; according to a recent study at Boise State University, at least 60 percent of women studied ( mostly younger college age women) consider themselves bi-curious. And other studies suggest that number goes up, and some say way up as women age.

[Roxanne Lanyon]

No, it is not pure sex for me. Roxanne is a happy bi "gurl", and so would adore a man in her life. She (or, I) so want a lover, a male SO who understands, and wants me, as Roxanne. I have so much love and adoration to give, and do not want to live alone for the rest of my life. Yes, I want to kiss, hug, snuggle, adore, be obedient to, a male in my life. I do not see any other way. Surely, there is someone out there, who will let me be happy as Roxanne.

- - - Updated - - -


One thing I have realized in my relatively long time on this earth is that we are all different in some ways, and at the same time we are all very similar. Lots of our stories are similar inasmuch as how we have trodden our paths, but we all tread slightly different paths. That is just the human condition. In these differences are differences of sexuality, how we feel about fellow humans, and there are a whole lot of contributory factors. All I can speak about is my feeling that we are born with certain proclivities that seldom change. I have always felt somewhere in between the gender stereotypes of man and woman, and have been attracted to the male as well as to the female. I have had encounters with men while dressed and not dressed, women while dressed and not dressed, and a lot in between while dressed and not dressed. I have loved all of those encounters, and derived a great deal of satisfaction, both sexual and relational with all of them bar very few. Thank god for diversity and our ability to embrace it :) Let's try not to get wrapped up in pedantics, taboos and denial.

Wonderful assessment, and I fully agree-Roxanne Lanyon

[Donna June]

I have a male friend who has come over a few times, when I am dressed, and we take girlfriend / boyfriend type pictures together, I'm the girl:) A lot of fun. He has hugged me and kisses me when he leaves. It was kind of nice and it gets my fantasies going, but I doubt I would let it go anymore than that.

[JenniferMBlack]

Only you know if you will ever go on with it and only you can decide how far you will go. For me not a question, I would in a heartbeat but dont have to be dressed. But then I am bi so there is that.

[abbiedrake]

Roxanne '... be obedient to...'?! Have you seen what year it is? A personal desire to have a dominant partner is fine but please don't suggest that obedience is somehow linked to being a woman.
Likewise Livinhose. I've tried sex with men. It's not for me. I'm straight. It is what it is. I thought I might be bi but I'm not. But also I wear women's jeans. I'm a liar, am I? You're very simply playing into that tired old narrative that all CDs are gay. Thanks. Oh and you're emphatically wrong. Like Lana Mae I'm a straight crossdresser. Why do we care about the labels? Well, personally, I don't but they are a simple and accurate description of who and what I am. It's not a case of 'protesting too much'. We're not in denial. Nor are we homophobic for pointing to own personal sexual preferences.

Surely a community as diverse and allegedly accepting as this can discuss both gender roles and sexuality without resort to anachronistic sexism and homophobia (or insinuations of such).

[Ressie]

The question doesn't really apply to me since I'm not totally hetero. I also don't know what feminine feels like since I'm not a woman.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I had to leave my fantasy, the urges became to strong, and I needed to know what I might be missing out on. I reached a point when I did not care if I was bi, so I surrendered to another Crossdresser. I will keep this PG, and just say, It was great, and I have no regrets. Sometimes you just have to leave your comfort zone, and try new things. Try It you just might like It!

Surrender to a man, NO. But I've seen some very attractive crossdressers. Would I ever kiss or make out with them? Maybe. Did I? I don't kiss and tell

[Sallee]

Another great question which I wonder about. I consider myself a hetro CD I do love dressing. I have been with a mail as a CD and I can say I didn't like it. generally don't find men attractive and have a hard time seeing what ggs see in men. I have been flirted with by guys and I love it but when it comes to touching not so much.
All this just makes our hobby so much more mysterious and strange

[sometimes_miss]

I generally don't find men attractive and have a hard time seeing what ggs see in men.
They see: Indications of leadership, which include intelligence, confidence, decisiveness, general lack of concern about other people's objections to his decisions; for women, height seems to matter a great deal, and most will initially not find a man shorter than herself even of possible interest, though that might change if he has exceptional other qualities. Indicators of strength (musculature, build and if he appears to be exceptionally physically fit, and again, height), awareness of what's going on around him, his tendency to be at the center the group during social interactions, his lack of spontaneous submissive behavior in social settings, displays of wealth and status, posture, and how other men seem to naturally behave somehow subordinate to him. FWIW, a lot of quite tall men seem to behave almost apologetic for their height; the alpha male, even when short, does not behave that way, nor does he usually behave aggressively; his status is clear to pretty much everyone around him. While there are some men that women consider 'beautiful', for the most part, a handsome physical appearance is only of secondary importance compared to everything else. As Kissinger once said, 'Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac'.

Even then, when a guy walks into a room and the women perk up and notice, I don't immediately see what THEY see in him. It's not what draws my attention. OTOH, when a hot woman walks in the room, all the women notice her. Something to do with the inherent feminine nature to be aware of her female competition in the social realm.

[phili]

I have found myself everywhere on the spectrum from -"Guys? Yuck. I'm totally straight" to "I am a woman and only interested romantically in men." to "I am gay and prefer being a man with other men" to "I am a male lesbian". My explanation is that humans compartmentalize A LOT- as a natural way to stay focused and get things done. The internal walls seem real and solid, and perhaps for some of us they are, or simply last a lifetime. It is fair not to assume that these walls are fiction, but in my case they were.

[Sissy_Michelle]

JaniceP,

It would seem that you have created a good discussion. Some pushed away into shyness over what they thought was okay to discuss to some firmly standing their ground preaching...

My feelings towards this is not a “label” or you must be this way to that.

If you are out and are attracted to someone then why shouldn’t you be happy? Regardless if they are male or female. If you are afraid of labels and what would others think then you need to look at what matters more to you the label or other people

Be yourself.

@—}——-
Michelle

[Lovinhose]

LovinHose. I am a Straight Cross Dresser. I have no desire for sex with either a man or a woman. I just like the feel of the cloths. I do enjoy going out on rare occurrences all dolled up. I still don't feel the need for sex with a man. To date, no man has hit on me when enfem either but 8 woman have hit on me in drab.
So therefore, you statement that all CDers who are saying they are straight and do no desire a mans relation are lieing is wrong.
I learned a long time ago to never make "absolute Statements" because there is always that one exception that destroys the absoluteness.

If you read my reply again, you might notice I said 'MOST' and not all, as you implied I stated 'absolutely.' Maybe you were in a hurry and missed that part...

[Jodie_Lynn]

A

>>SNIP<<

All this just makes our hobby so much more mysterious and strange

For some of us, it's not a hobby. ;)

[StefaniLara]

I could, and I have. In the past couple of years, I've been with men almost exclusively, though not in any meaningful way.

[Wendi]

Hi Hun. I have to admit I am pretty jealous. About to head into surgery for the 2nd time in 6 months. :( It is what it is. I love you and our friendship. I wish you all the best!!! All My LOVE Wendi :)

[Leslie Mary S]

If you read my reply again, you might notice I said 'MOST' and not all, as you implied I stated 'absolutely.' Maybe you were in a hurry and missed that part...
your correct you did say most. but still the uses of the word "most" has little relevance.Most implies "almost all". where as the use of "some" would have been better.

[Jennifer Soames]

WOW,

I don't want to add to the core discussion but would say we are all individuals so don't equate you with me and expect to get a tick. Just enjoy yourselves, whatever that includes.

I did love the discussion. for me: I love the attention of women and being girlfriends, if anything else comes up I will make up my mind at the time, with little regret. I do however value my privacy so am very discrete about Jenny, and as such don't currently plan to make a big thing about anything. The key is acceptance of self and some people struggle with this so give them some latitude and if you disagree that's good, but be kind. Most of us here know what fear is! don't be the person who generates it.

Jen

[Leslie Mary S]

Hi Hun. I have to admit I am pretty jealous. About to head into surgery for the 2nd time in 6 months. :( It is what it is. I love you and our friendship. I wish you all the best!!! All My LOVE Wendi :)

I hope I speak for all but I do for myself. Good luck on the surgery. we pray for you.
Leslie Mary Shy
The Southern Lady hiding in Yankee man's work cloths.

[Kate Jennings]

Everyone has their own feelings, for me:

When in male mode, I identify as a heterosexual man.
I will notice a good looking or together guy but I'm not attracted to men.

When I am dressed, I am very attracted to men and I have acted upon that attraction.

When dressed, I am still attracted to women and have been with women while dressed and the holy grail, a couple!

[Trione]

Never say never. I have been attracked to a few guy in male mode. Wife even enjoy watching a guy hit on me in male mode. We went to a party one night and I was dressed to the nines, if I was going to submit to a guy that would of been the night, but the only one to hit on me was a lesbian. Now I'm at and age that if anyone hits on me I would welcome it.