Wife is borrowing my underwear - Working DADT

[Julie1123]

We recently found out we're expecting our first kid and my wife has hit the stage in the pregnancy where her underwear is no longer fitting. She wears a medium and I wear a large. Instead of buying all new, she asked if she could borrow some of mine. I told her I had thought of that as an option too but didn't want to bring it up and told her she was welcome to help herself to whatever she wanted to wear. I think today was the first day that she did. :)

[Macey]

Forget the darn underwear …. CONGRATS on the BRAND NEW PERSON you're expecting! :)

[Dannie1]

Congrats on both accounts. Help me out. New to forum chat, what does DADT mean?

[Elizabeth G]

Hi Julie,

Congrats on both fronts! You must be thrilled:yippee:

Hi Dannie,

DADT = Don't Ask Don't Tell

[Julie1123]

Thank you all! We’re excited!

Dannie, as Elizabeth said, it means don’t ask don’t tell. Basically, my wife knows about my crossdressing but doesn’t want to see or think about me that way. So as long as I keep things out of sight and don’t talk about it unless she does everything is good. I have a dresser and part of our shared closet to keep things in. She’s pro-trans rights so I don’t think it’s an out and out dislike but something personal keeping her from accepting it fully. If I had to guess it would be concerns about persecution and embarrassment if we were open about it.

[RADER]

Congrats. on your new Family Addition.
Although never expecting, My wife would hit my drawer for Pantyhose all the time.
She said it was like having a back up service in the house all the time.
Rader

[Dannie1]

That means I have a dadt situation. Thank you for clarification both.

[NikkiFacade]

Congrats on the new addition! My wife shares my things and I share hers. She borrows my boy things and girl things. I think it's great you guys can share! That's what best friends do right?

[Julie1123]

That's excellent, Rader!

Nikki, unfortunately I'm tall and skinny and my wife is short and a bit curvy so in general sharing isn't really an option. Hoping this opens her up a bit more though.

[Majella St Gerard]

DADT= Don't Ask Don't Take (my panties). Cotton panties are cheap, buy her her own. Would she lend you a pair? Just saying.
Congratulations and all but she don't want to know anything about crossdressing but wants to raid your pant draw. I'd draw a line at borrowing panties until the DADT is renegotiated.
Just my 2 cents.
Again congratulations.

[KayC]

I don't think either partner should take/use each other's things without permission. What's wrong with having some personal space and privacy? A person shouldn't have to lock up their clothes, it should be a matter of consideration and respect for each other.

[abbiedrake]

Contrary to what some others say Julie I think this is a good thing. And I don't believe it's something you could or should use as a bargaining chip. I'll bet that your wife appreciates the gesture and will repay you somehow in future.

[Kiwi Primrose]

Congratulations on both counts and I think DADT will eventually be a distant memory. You already have shared experience and the child will enhance that. All the best for your future.

[Crissy 107]

Let me add my Congrats also and I think that she asked to borrow your panties is a small sign of acceptance so take it for what it is and be happy. I happily take all the small steps forward that I can.

[Stiletto Gurl]

Haha. This is awesome! My wife has asked if I had any pantyhose she could wear to work because she was out! ☺️

[Kelly DeWinter]

Congratulations to both you and your wife. Make sure you do as much as you can for her as her pregnancy progresses. As for the other thing, I would recommend taking her shopping, I would not confuse necessity for acceptance. Shopping for her or with her will go more towards showing you care.

[Maid_Marion]

Talking is good for a relationship. Sometimes it is best to just "pay forward" and don't worry about getting a return. Just talking is good progress.

[BTWimRobin]

Congratulations to the both of you. So exciting that you are expecting your first child. Keeping the lines of communication open is key to more support and acceptance.

[Abbey11]

Congratulations to you both, the sharing was your suggestion and your wife is now accepting the offer :hugs:

[VivienneH]

Congratulations on both counts to you both! Xx.