Another skill to master

[Helen_Highwater]

So I've just posted (https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?266538-Smitten&p=4391638#post4391638)about how infatuated I am with one of my daughter's dresses.

The realisation that had I seen this dress hanging on a rail in the shops I'd probably just discount it as being too simple, "Nah, nothing special. Move on". Now I realise that picking out those items that are the real winners, the standout drop dead head turners is a skill many GG's have that I've yet to fully develop.

As I say in the post, on the hanger this dress just looked nothing special. Being able to visulalise what it'll look like on, to know it's well worth a try on, well I can see it's something I'm going to need to work on.

I believe I can put together a good outfit. I've an eye for colours that work well together. Things complement each other and not clash but knowing that something like this LBD would be such a winner, well it's been a bit of a revelation.

Have you ever surprised yourself by trying something on more out of curiosity that anything to find you've hit on a real find. Can you spot that gorgeous little number hiding on the rail that everyone else walks by?

Any how, in the future I won't be going shopping, I'll be enhancing my skill set.

[Micki_Finn]

Fashion sense is one of those things that’s weirdly half skill, half talent. Knowledge and experience can get you far though. The trick is to not look at the clothes as an item themselves, but also their relationship to your body. Knowing fabrics helps too.

I can generally pick out something that’s going to be stunning just by looking at it. I don’t always know if it will work for me until I try it on.

[docrobbysherry]

I have no imagination and little fashion sense! :doh:

I only know what I like! And often? It takes me quite sometime after wearing an item, looking in the mirror, or even the photos, before I really like the piece or outfit!:daydreaming:

(Which helps explain some of the ridiculous photos I've posted!):eek:

[DanielleCD]

Agreed... something that takes time and experience... I have a couple of dresses that look stunning until I put them on... and then plain, simple LBD's that look fabulous.

[Elizabeth G]

I have a friend who owns a women's consignment shop and quite a bit of my wardrobe has come from her store.

I love to browse the racks but also the are times where I just ask her to make suggestions. On several occasions she has pulled things out for me that I wouldn't give a second glance to on the hanger but when I tried them on I really loved them. I do ok for myself and I'm getting better (I think) but she really has a great eye. I don't know if it's experience or a gift but it works for me.

[suzanne]

Over the last couple of years, I have learned what shapes and proportions work on my body, and that only a few of the items normally stocked in a dress shop will work. For example, only a sheath, or a shift or maybe an A line dress will work on me. I can totally ignore all those fit and flair dresses that look so nice on a curvy model. I curve, but in the wrong ways! LOL!

[Jillian Faith]

Sign me up for this skill training. Although like Helen I'm good with colors and coordinating outfits, I stumble a lot when seeing an outfit just hanging on a hanger as I have difficulty visualizing how it will look on me. I realized this deficit early on when my wife would go shopping hit a few sales and bring a load of clothes home for me to try on. I would look them over and swoon over several items. After trying on each item usually the items I'd swooned over did nothing for me but an item I'd passed over looked fabulous.

[Rhonda Jean]

I've had almost the opposite experience. A few years ago I had seen several women wearing long casual summer dresses. Simple things, and they looked so great in them that I had to have one! Looked so easy. I found out that for me, those simple dresses are very unforgiving. I knew they'd show every lump and bump, but I can deal with that. Hips, shoulders, neck... there's not a body part or a dimension that these things don't highlight in an unflattering way on me. I bet I tried on a hundred. Finally bought one that was the lesser of many evils. Wore it a couple of times and I don't think I even have it anymore.

[Cheryl T]

That's a 2 way street. Sometimes it's imagination and intuition and sometimes it's just trial and error.
I've found some wonderful items I thought were fabulous only to go "Ewww what was I thinking" when I tried them on in the dressing room.
Then there are those that I see and just know it's going to be wonderful and it is.

I think that's why they make dressing rooms and full length mirrors....lol

[CynthiaD]

Mostly it’s just trial and error for me, but my favorite dress is one I spotted while walking through Walmart. I looked at it and thought, “That would look fabulous on me.” And it does. Total cost: $12. I wish it were always that easy.

[Teresa]

Helen,
I would say I do have that gift but it's not just about choosing clothes it's possibly why I did OK as a photographer , knowing when something looks good or when an idea works . I've carried on now with my paintings , maybe it is an inborn talent how to make people look good and what helps them in doing so .

One LBD I spotted in a M&S outlet store just caught my attention , it looked good on the hangar and fitted so well when I tried it on , some clothes are like a hand in a glove , looking back I've made very few mistakes , I know what look I want and how to achieve it . I do admit some colours take confidence to wear but the art then is how to make them work .

[Asew]

There is definitely a huge learning curve when starting. When I first started buying my own clothes, I would maybe only buy 15% of the items I brought into the fitting room (though I would try on a lot of maybes to see if something not typically my style would work for me). Nowadays it is maybe 75% since I can tell if something is going to work or not. Sometimes at thrift store I bring something to the fitting room that probably won't work but I want to try it on to see if I could alter it somehow to make it work in another way (though for regular retail I want something that will fit and flatter straight off the hanger). I like the idea of that is a skill to master and not just shopping :)

[Helen_Highwater]

Asew,

I definitely feel is a learned skill. Some GG's never master it. They'll copy what Angelina Jolie wears to an swanky opening and not realise on them it hangs like a sack. Over guilding a lilly.

Similarly something simple like this dress, well if it flatters my frame then that shows keeping things simple can pay huge dividends. Eye catching on the rail isn't as I'm learning always an indicator that it'll hang as well on you.

[susan54]

I agree that this is a skill that takes a time to develop. I found that being professionally styled made a very big difference to both my confidence and my ability to pick an outfit. The other thing to try is booking a session with the professional stylist in a department store. This is usually free and their skills vary. I have had one who was rubbish but mostly they are good at what they do, and will pick things you would walk past and ask you to give them a try. One of my most stylish dresses looked frumpy and boring when I was shown it by the personal shopper in Fenwick in York. When I put it on it was fabulous and introduced me to Mandy Marsh dresses, and I now have about 10 of them. I wore that one to a classical concert that evening and loved it. I probably now buy 75% of what I try on too, and I find that certain designers suit my figure especially well - White Stuff and Betty Barclay. Generally the simpler the better with a really good cut - block colour and quality fabric. In fact I would say fabric is probably the most important bit. Prints and fussy detail are always going to be more difficult. I am on a couple of closed Facebook sites relating the style consultancy I used and it is very clear indeed that GGs who have had their consultations undergo a massive boost in confidence about what to wear and what to look for in the shops. They are happy to have male clients for their women's style classes and the other members of the Facebook sites know I am male. The consultations are pricey but you end up saving a fortune because the clothes you buy work for you. The only mistakes I make now are when I am rushed.

[NancySue]

I don’t have a good fashion sense. I like conservative styles. When I see something on a rack or in a catalog, I ask my wife’s opinion. She has a great sense of style which I totally respect. I love it when she surprises me with something she thinks might look good on me and something I’d like. She’s been correct 99% of the time.

[BrendaPDX]

Hi Helen, I had to laugh at myself, "fashion sense" I am just happy if it fits! I love your post, and it made me laugh about myself. Thanks

[Sarah Doepner]

This isn't a native language to me and even when I attempt to visualize something in the store as part of my wardrobe, I usually only come close. However, once I try things on I can see if it works or not. So I'm not sure if I have part of the skill set or if I've just developed an ability to finally match clothes with my age and frame. There are still moments when I see something and I'm smitten, only to take a deep breath and realize it would have worked for me 20 years and 40 pounds ago. I suppose that's a good thing, recognizing I have limits, but it does eliminate a lot of the fun.

[AngelaYVR]

I know I would have walked by that dress. I’m a little hung up when it comes to material and wouldn’t touch anything labeled as “jersey knit” or somesuch with a 10 foot pole because it looks awful after a few times being worn. Manufacturers love it because it’s cheap. Actually, I don’t think I’ve shopped for anything “new” in a couple of years, I buy exclusively from thrift and consignment to get the better made items from years ago. Back from the time you had interesting materials that felt nice, had texture and classic patterns. When you could find darting in fitted blouses and not the ugly square monstrosities they make today. Yes, I’m opinionated! ;)

But to answer your question, I rarely but still do surprise myself although the last time was a year and a half ago when I bought a light sleeveless summer dress, I was amazed it looked so good. It has a sleek finished look that still shows my shape but I never thought sleeveless would ever look good on me.

[KiraK]

I'm still so new to this that I haven't developed ANY sense of a particular style. At the moment, my shopping has been primarily Amazon purchases, and many returns. I have no idea how to really size myself as my dimensions are over the map,even for a male. A couple of things I have bought have been amazing and I love them, one or two things just did not end up looking anything like they looked in the pictures and went back.

As for brick and mortar shopping, I've only gone to local Walmarts and Targets for stockings and panties. Some of the most nerve wracking moments of my life. I tried to look around at a neighborhood Kohls, but the minute I was looking in the underwear section security started following me. I was immediately uncomfortable and chose to leave the store. Admittedly, I was dressed in male clothes at the time and most definitely do not look feminine in general, but still, I DO have a wedding ring on so it could've been for my wife for all they knew. I may have to do some research and find some CD friendly stores in the area. I'd really love to be able to try things on before I buy them and maybe get some higher quality fashions than Amazon has, but the thought scares me right now of buying in public. There's also the financial aspect, clothes from b/m stores are so much more expensive and I don't want to get addicted to buying clothes when money is kind of tight.

The real hard part for me now is seeing women I know wearing really cool and sexy clothes and I suddenly want to know where they bought them. That's a REALLY new concept for me. I've never been like that before in my life. There's also the added bonus of not being able to ask them because I'm afraid of being outed.