All these years.............

[CarlaWestin]

..........and I've never told any of my siblings or immediate family anything about my activity.
I can only speculate what was thrown around during divorce long ago.

Accepted by family? Any confidant siblings? A parent?

[docrobbysherry]

I had to tell my adult daughter when she moved back in or she would have caught me!:doh:

Otherwise? They wouldn't know!:heehee:

[RADER]

Only my late Wife knew of my dressing. I bet when I die, there will be a lot of head scratching and wondering.
O' Well, I won't be around to notice anything.
Rader

[AngelaYVR]

I told my mum years ago in case I ever ended up under a bus. I told my daughter this summer because she's finished school and was ready to find out about this important part of my life. Not much of a chance I will tell my brothers.

[sometimes_miss]

Nope, no success story here. My ex wife blackmailed me during the divorce, said if I didn't give her everything, she's out me to my family, friends and co-workers. Knowing her as I thought I did, I wanted to head her off, and at least let my family know from my own mouth rather than hers. My mother was shocked, and remained in denial for the rest of her life. My sister looked horrified, as I also disclosed that I was molested by her childhood's best friend's older brother. She still avoids contact with me. After those two failures, I didn't tell anyone else. I gave my wife everything she asked for. AFAIK, she held up her end of the agreement.
Rather than risk the whole 'He's a freak!' fiasco, I first disclosed that I had been sexually abused as a child. Of course, thanks to our lovely news media having previously screwed up the logic, and instead of telling that child molesters had almost always been abused themselves, they make the news more juicy by saying that children who are molested are more likely to become child molesters themselves. The few friends I told, gradually removed me from their lives. Nope, I stopped telling anyone about my problems.

[Elizabeth G]

My wife has known for several years now. She's not thrilled but she works with me on it. I told both of my brothers in the last few months and in both cases it went very well. I also told both of my adult children and have had no problems there either. The only immediate family member who I have not told is my father and I'm hesitant to do so. He is quite old and is also old school. First off I don't think he would get it. I think it would knock him for a loop. I would not expect him to be very accepting.

[Judy-Somthing]

I was out to all my friends and family in my teens but my wife to be didn't like it so I went "INTO THE CLOSET" ARRRRRRRR!
After I found this web-site 2-1/2 years ago I started to like who I am rather than hating being a CD-er.
I told the wife about me like to dress, it went bad for over a year.
My daughter was bumming that my SO and I were arguing quite a bit and asked why! I told her about my dressing, she said "SO" and then drove over to my son's house and told him,
He said "what's wrong with that"

[bridget thronton]

My wife and adult children were told by me along with their spouses - no problems with any of them

[Micki_Finn]

Yeah, my family knows. They are supportive.

[Ashanti]

I just told my younger sister about my CDing about six months ago. She is very accepting of the fact. I regret not telling her about it sooner, maybe not in the childhood years, but when we were all adults. As a matter of fact, today I received great tips from her regarding make up and foundations.

[Michelle Crossfire]

Both my parents have passed away. I never mentioned a thing to them. My sisters are not intelligent enough to understand and are quite hypocritical, so there is no chance I will ever mention anything to them. I don't see my daughter thanks to the ineptness of family court. My current wife is the only family member who knows, who supports me, as I have mentioned on more than one occasion on this site. Her family knows nothing, and I am not changing that.

[CayleeMarie]

As for me, my wife knows and is very accepting and supportive. The only other people who know is a couple whom I have known for a very long time who support my Caylee time in their home. I would love to tell my oldest stepdaughter who is MTF trans, because I think she is the only one in my circle who would truly get it. Otherwise no one else knows, mostly because my wife is terrified of the potential negative judgment that will befall me if anyone else knew.

[BTWimRobin]

My wife is the only person I've told. She's okay with it but I think she's hoping it would go away.. I have an elderly aunt who I take care of. I've been thinking about coming out to her. I don't think she would be the least bit surprised. As a kid growing up I was always in her things.

[JennB]

Just long term X-G/F knew about my dressing, she marginally tolerated, but honestly never felt like was fully allowed to express that part of myself with her, might be part of the reason she is an X; when you can't really be yourself. Fortunate enough my wife who knows is accepting and doesn't mind when the Jenn part of me expresses. But just an at home thing for me, so it hasn't developed some of the other challenges and decision points that I know many have or have to work(ed) through.

[Sandi Beech]

Carla, for me, there is no chance of telling any family members. I know them well and it would go badly. As for my wife, she has only busted me for owning items like pantyhose. Just having one pair in the drawer would land me in the doghouse for a week. I can not imagine what she would do if she found my current stash. Anyhow, looks like you have a birthday coming up according to your profile so happy B-day in advance.

Sandi

[sara66]

My wife knows and is supportive, but still doesn't want to see me dressed. My sister knows and we have been out shopping and lunch together. I have been helping her through some personal issues over the last year so has just gave me some cosmetics. She will call sometimes and we will do some online shopping together.
Sara

[GretchenM]

A lot of my family knows, but I do not feel rejection from anyone except one sister in law who is very conservative and doesn't accept much of anything that isn't consistent with stereotypical and traditional behavior. One sister in law and my youngest daughter, who is a therapist, are the most accepting. My wife is tolerant but not really very supportive. But nobody has seen Gretchen in her full plumage, but they have seen enough of preference for feminine colors in men's clothing and the occasional women's T or sweatshirt that are quite plain to get the picture. It's OK. Not fully what I would prefer but acceptable.

[CarlaWestin]

I had to tell my adult daughter when she moved back in or she would have caught me!:doh:

Otherwise? They wouldn't know!:heehee:

Geez! I forgot that I've told my fabulous Daughter a couple of years ago. Totally accepting and she wants to meet Carla someday.
Bonus: it completely cheezed off the ex. Yawn!

[alwayshave]

Carla, I have stated here before, my mother is aware.

[Sidney]

My wife knows of my crossdressing and is accepting. Also I have told our two adult daughters who are happy and accepting of my fem side. I have also come out to two male friends who have been very accepting and actually encouraging. LOL, one admitted he had a fem side and that his wife knows and is very supportive. He and I have lunch about once a week but have not seen each other enfem, only pictures. I dont broadcast my Sidney side however the few I have told love me for all of me.

[cdinmd206]

I have not told any of my family about my CDing. The ex wife knew I loved wearing lingerie before we were married and loved it when we were both wearing stockings, garter belt, panties and heels. She tolerated it when I said I would like to fully dress and go out out sometime. At first she would go out with me and then later on preferred to stay at home. After the daughter left for college and I tried dressing at home I could see she really did not like it so I stopped. The daughter may suspect I do but has never asked. If she does I will be honest with her. I have a very good female friend who I may come out to in the near future.

[April Rose]

I told my wife before we were married. It has varied over time, often due to unrelated factors, but for the most part she has been supportive. I dress every day at home, but don't go out, per her request. She recently told me she was grateful to have a man in a dress who loved her rather than someone more masculine who was abusive.

I came out to my son when he was 22. He was fine with it. It turned out he had known since he was 14. Since my wife and I had been "hippie" types, he was sure there was pot in the house and he went through the whole house looking for it. There wasn't any. We hadn't smoked it in years. What he did find was my diaries. Oops.

My older brother walked in on me while I was cooking dinner in a skirt. Again, ok with it.

I didn't feel it was right for my wife to have to be in the closet with me, so I told her she was free to talk our situation over with anyone she felt comfortable sharing it with. the first person she told was her sister. Turned out she already knew as well. It seems I'd confided with her years before when I was loaded. We used to party a lot in the old days.;)

Others know as well, to the extent that really, I have no control over it whatsoever. It's all good, it has seldom been brought up unless by me. The few conversations I've had about it have been reassuring.

A transitioned Sister once told me: "If they liked you before, they'll like you after. If they didn't like you before they won't like you after." I think that is true for CD's as well.

[Sarah Doepner]

My parents and only sibling died well before I was ready to come out and I don't think they knew beyond me being caught a couple of times in my early teens.

After about 25 years of marriage my wife found out, partially thorough me being surprised but probably more because I needed to tell her. After a week of anxiety while she did her research, she decided much of what she loved about me was represented in my embrace of femininity. That was it for years until she passed away and I was effectively returned to the closet. I didn't like that and a few years later I sat my adult daughter down and told her. She said "We were wondering when you were going to tell us." Long before my wife knew it seems my middle son had found links on the family computer that outed me. They never said a word until I brought it up and have been fine.

Since then I started sharing it very selectively except for the day a grand-nephew stopped in unexpectedly and found me, so I explained to him and he was good with it. No problem except his grandfather, my brother-in-law is very homophobic/transphobic and has a drinking temper. So I told his older sister and a couple others on that side of the family to build some strategic allies for when he finds out. In the last 18 months I started hormones and now I'm out to most of my closest friends, all with support and even a few jokes here and there. There are some former co-workers who I've come out to and even though we were employed in Law Enforcement, there has been nothing there but support. It's becoming a secret the way there are secret "Hidden Mickys" around Disneyland. The only negative is the reluctance to tell my brother-in-law and the older he gets and the worse his health becomes, the less of an issue he becomes.

[Teresa]

Carla,
I recently posted a thread titled , " The whole World and it's neighbour knows " that's how it appears to be now . My wife reeled off a list of people who knew around my old home town , I must admit for once it felt OK to be told this because she could no longer make me feel ashamed or guilty , she is now learning how to deal with it . I know it will never feel normal to her as it does for me but it's not my problem anymore my life has permanently changed there is no going back to the way it was .

[carhill2mn]

My wife knew that I liked to wear women's clothes, etc. She also knew that I liked to go out and present as a woman. Her acceptance varied over the years from sort-of, to that is terrible, to DADT, to OMG no, to acceptance again.

When we told our daughters and husbands that we were getting a divorce she told them that I liked to wear women's clothes. They really did not care. They were much more upset about the divorce. This really ticked off my wife!

[Devi SM]

Carla, I'm sorry to crash in this thread that's yours again but I see you're crying without tears or at least i can't see them.
Believe me that the tough part of the story we feared with wife was the kids. 3 married men with amazing women but you know who was radical and fundamental to go out to the world? My three kids. One if them came to us one day asking me why I don't come out and be happy, he told us love us unconditionally because we had taught him to be a good man and a good husband and part ok that was honesty. The rest is history
You can see pics of us with wife, kids in my Instagram.....may be you're not trans (I think you are) may be you don't have the urgency to live as a woman (o may be you have but you know you could satisfy it) t hi is life is just one, and as someone told the story of a survey to old people in hospices and rest home, asked about their regrets on life, almost all of them said that the main regrets were to not have done some things in life that was too late now...

Devi

[StacieVS]

I have told my fiancee, my children from a previous marriage, future step-daughter, mom, and best friend and all have been supportive. My fiancee and future step-daughter love helping me shop for clothes and are starting to teach me about makeup.

I have not told my father or siblings and probably will not. We have not been close for many years.

[Bobbi46]

Easy for some not easy for others my dressing was severely suppressed because of the work I did, nothing lasts for ever and 2 divorces followed finally finding my kids after trying for close on 20 yrs succeeded in that but now fearful of telling them for losing them once again!
if only i could find a way of telling my kids I would.

[Lea]

I have told both of my wives.
During my divorce my first wife threatened to use it against me in order to keep me from having custody of my daughter. In the end she did not but only because I would have been fired from work and then no alimony or child support.
My second wife knows and has been supportive until this year. For some reason she does not want to see it this year. We have been married 15 years.
I have never told anyone else.
I did go out dressed with my mom and wife one Halloween but she has no idea.

[Stevie Allyn]

My wife has known since April 2004. She found out a few hours after I did when she got home from work to find me wearing some of her old clothes she had put aside to take to a charity shop. Apparently I had the biggest smile ever on my face ...

Pretty much anyone I care about now knows - sisters, their husbands, nieces and nephews I told maybe ten years ago. In-laws know but they were told more recently - in-law cousins found out at a meal at our house when I left the table part way through the evening and returned wearing my then favourite skirt and top.

The weekend before last I outed myself on Facebook to all my FB friends and also on the Whatsapp group for fans of the semi-professional football (soccer) team we support. Everyone who has commented has been supportive. If anyone is at all anti then I see that as their problem, not mine.

Talking to my wife yesterday we realised her foster sister may not know, but she's coming round to our place this evening and we'll make sure she does know tonight. Wouldn't want her and her husband being shocked at the Christmas get together where I'll probably be wearing a dress :battingeyelashes:

There's a couple of friends who we haven't told as my wife reckons the woman just wouldn't be able to cope with the info.

[candykowal]

There was a time, when everyone in my immediate family knew I was living as a girl...but I am in the closet, sort of...for over25 years now!.
Mom raised me to embrace my feminine traits and I was her last child, a girl she didn't get...but that's a whole novel.
I was taught a hard lesson after college, being engaged twice to girls who couldn't get passed my femininity.
So I went deep into the closet and gave up presenting as a girl, when I met my current and only wife, I was 35 when I purged.
Family members who knew teenager and college girl Candice, knew about my failed engagements so they were all pretty keen about not offering info about my past.
Nothing about me being transgendered was mentioned or suggested.
What my wife got was from the family is I was coddled and pampered as the youngest of all boys, and was a sickly baby.
I gave up all my efforts to transition after I met my current wife and purged for over 15 years since we married.
There are maybe 3 people in the family who, "know all" ...and are still alive.
Keeping the secret of my girly past reaffirms my thoughts that by staying in the closet, that is keeping my marriage of over 25 years working.
She married a husband, not a transgendered girl. I would feel very selfish if I forced my desires to be femme whenever I want on her....or her family and our friends.
Sure I would be naive to think she doesn't know more than she says, I have natural breasts and a lot of feminine traits, after all...
By keeping Candice separate from my husband self, I keep our DADT relationship working.
Today, after all is said and done, I am comfortable with both side and don't mind if I am husband or my Candice self.
But it is sure a lot of fun to reminisce and relive my youthful days!

309168

[Laura28]

What a great story!

[JenniferR771]

Oh gosh, Candy. You were so cute in high school!

My wife knows--but DADT relationship.
Two adult daughters know--but they are sort of neutral on the idea.
Younger brother knows--again rather neutral--he has not mentioned my cding in years.
Good question, Carla. Be nice to your daughter.

[DanielleDubois]

Only my wife knows... and the pets we have had :). As for my wife we have gone through the total spectrum. Total secrecy, to DADT, to not minding seeing Danielle, to every permutation in between, to the current situation where we can talk about most Danielle things and she will ask how a Danielle day went but does not want to see Danielle. But even with open discussion sometimes the unexpected negative reaction occurs. The other day I was telling her I had bought several new wigs and she was quite upset about the money I spend on Danielle stuff. I calmly tried to to explain yearly it was less than she spends on her hobbies but it was one of those times that rational discussion was not going to cut through her emotional reaction.