It's going to be a sad day?

[Maria 60]

My last post I bought a new wig and tonight I was putting it away, more like hidding it. My wife asked me since I have a new wig why I don't throw out some of my old ugly ones, Maria is not a very good throw out person. As she was looking in my drawer she pointed out how much stuff I have and why I don't wear a lot of it and that when I dress I usally wear the same thing and if she doesn't know about something. She asked if Maria is planning to evolve or I'm I planning some big coming out and why I don't wear more of my stuff and what am I saving it for. She said we are not old but we're heading close to our 60s and maybe I should start enjoying my stuff, she pointed out how many slips I have and I barely wear them and when I was planning too. I told her it's hard for me to get dolled up to just sit in the house and if I do dress better is when I go for my Friday drives once in a while. She said all she was saying is we are not getting younger and maybe I should start enjoying my stuff I'm saving for she doesn't know what or when. She was right because I'm seeing a lot of my friends having medical problems and this really bad feeling came over me. I told her its going to be a very sad day when I have to give up my slips, and even give up my other stuff. She asked why I don't wear my slips to bed and get some use out of them and maybe start wearing more of my better hoisiey when I go for my drives. I'm sitting here now thinking about the future of my dressing and coming to the realization that one day I am probably going to have to remove my stuff. Did anyone else here come to the realization that we are getting older and what's going to happen to our fem stuff and what items are you going to be the hardest to let go. I hope I don't get anyone feeling like s*#t like I'm feeling now, but I'm going to start wearing and enjoy my stuff. Thanks.

[April Rose]

I'm 69 and I have known pretty clearly that I am getting older for some time now. Just yesterday I heard that yet another old friend has been diagnosed with cancer. They are dropping like flies.

Tempus fugit, my dear. What do you have your things for, if you're not going to wear them? Listen to your wife.

For myself, I'll only let go of things that are out of style, or that I don't wear anymore. When I'm dead somebody else is going to have to go through my dresses and other things, to dispose of them. It's not going to be my problem.

[Sandi Beech]

Hey there Maria. I am a little confused about why you are thinking you will have to give up your clothes, unless it is more a concern about health in the long run. We are actually fairly close in age and I am buying more for my stash all the time. I am more worried about getting caught by my wife and having to toss everything.

Besides may as well live it up as long as you can. Best wishes

Sandi

[Robertacd]

Why don't you just come out? Then you could wear anything any time.

I was once like that with tons of clothes that I never wore. After a while I even started questioning why I keep buying more. My answer was since in my heart these are the clothing I should be wearing, but I don't. So in my mind I have nothing to wear. Hence the constant desire to buy more clothes...

After I came out that need to hold clothing went away because I wear my clothes and I only buy clothes that I will wear out in public.

[RADER]

I am 72, with health problems, But I still have a ton of dresses, skirts and undies.
Should I start throwing things out, well maybe, but why should I. Just because I do not
wear it often, does not mean that I will not some day.
I have packed away a few things that are near the end of there life, I can always throw
the box away when I am ready to.
Rader

[Jean 103]

They are your things, you should enjoy them.

Also if you like wearing the same thing all the time, give up there's no hope. Just kidding.

Do what makes you happy. Live life, the future is not guaranteed.

My rule is if I will not wear it , than it goes. That and if I try something on three times and I don't choose to wear it, than it becomes a contender for the donation pile.

[AngelaYVR]

Sort your clothes, watch Sideways and wear your nice clothes! Life is for enjoying now, not some indeterminate point in the future.

[Tracii G]

OMG 56 is not the end of the world Maria.
You have lots of time left to enjoy what you have so why not enjoy it?
I have vintage instruments that most people would guard in a safe but I take them out and play them because thats what they were made for.I have one instrument called a Gittern which was made in the 1500s and worth ridiculous money but I play it a lot.
What good do they do me if I don't play them?
Wear what you have in your collection and enjoy the pieces you have

[Majella St Gerard]

Buying stuff and hording it and not wearing it seems very odd to me, what's the sense of that? If the wife is ok with it, go for it.
I'm 57 and I make full use of my extensive wardrobe.
Granted my situation is different than yours, I don't have someone to dictate what I can or can not do.

[Helen_Highwater]

Maria,

I can understand that getting dolled up to stay indoors might seem a waste. However there's pleasure to be found just seeing yourself in all your finery looking back from the mirror.

And why not wear some of these things while out for a drive? You've bought them, you must therfore like them so wear them.

Also, is your SO telling you something here? Is she saying to you that perhaps now is the time in your life to start pushing the boundaries. To get out more. A recognition that your CD'ing is such a part of you it needs to be given full reign?

Perhaps a discussion about your future dressing taking you out more is on the cards.

[NancyJ]

Wow Maria, what I would give for my wife to ENCOURAGE me to crossdress, rather than to ignore that I do so. You are one lucky gal. Seems like she is giving you a push to live life to the fullest. Perhaps the two of you could discuss ways to expand your experiences beyond the solo Friday drives. Sounds like an opportunity to me. Take it. Nancy

[kimdl93]

It occurs to me daily. Your wife is right and I think you should listen to her advice.

[Stevie Allyn]

Hi Maria.

I'm with your wife and the others who are saying you should wear your clothes more. If you feel getting fully dressed up just to stay at home isn't worth the effort just make a "date" with your wife where you have a nice candle-lit meal at home where both of you dress up for the occasion. That can be good fun for the two of you.

[GretchenM]

I too think your wife's thoughts are very relevant and you should consider them very seriously. How you do it is up to you, but you need to consider her advice - she knows you, maybe better than you know you. Love sometimes works that way.

At 74 I often ponder the time when the behavior will need to end. But I always come around to deciding it does not have to end unless I am physically unable. Jenny22 is 85 and is still dressing and loving it. No need to fear the end point. It may never come and more likely than not it will always be a part of you to some extent, even if it is minimal. It is who you are.

[SherriePall]

Maria -- I get a kick out of you youngsters. Wear them. Have fun. So what if you're not going to the opera or some fancy ball and have no reason to wear this item or that. Get all dolled up. Otherwise, you'll be 10 years older and start having regrets.

[Stephanie47]

Darn straight I am realizing I am getting older...72. Locally, my mother-in-law is the eldest of the clan (85). My brother is 73 and lives across the country from me. I figure when my MIL passes away I'll be the oldest person at family gatherings. Maria, I wish my wife was like your wife. I know I am not immortal. I'm in decent health, but, who knows what tomorrow will bring? I have way too many dresses (162). I have a passion for full slips. I know if I were to pass on today my local favorite charity shop (America Cancer Society) or a battered women's shelter will be well stocked. With such an understanding wife I would encourage you to dress up as much as you can. I cannot think of anything more fulfilling than being able to be fully en femme (dress, hosiery and heels, panty, bra, slip and wig) and preparing dinner alongside my wife. I would encourage you to dress up and encourage your wife to do the same. Two lovely ladies enjoying their leisure time together. What a great way to age out of this world. Do it!

[Debra Russell]

Maria, I am 74 and dress and go out as much as possible. I have never seen a picture of you (please post one-you have beautiful legs) is seems as though you only go out for drives - not much to get dressed for. If you actually get out, like shopping or running errands you would make use of all those clothes and you would not wonder what to do with them and probably want to add to your wardrobe.

Please Maria - bite the bullet get out and be seen, you will never regret it - and post the results to give others inspiration ………………………………..Debra

[Jenny22]

I've had to slow down on buying new girl's things. For too long I bought what was 'so pretty and just had to have.' My closet is stuffed. I have Many skirts and tops that I rarely wear, and could go, but stay. But I have started to rotate more thru my dresses, and try not to wear the same thing twice in a row. Now anything I purchase is truly a must have.

[Teresa]

Maria,
When you go out on a more regular basis you do get to appreciate the items that work and the ones are just there for sentimental reasons . I don't wear any of my slips because they are all on or below the knee , I wear bras that are comfortable and practical to wear all day , the pretty lacey ones are OK for a couple of hours .

Occasionally I wonder what will happen to my things if anything happens to me , the conclusion is everyone knows how I present myself so it should come as no surprise .

[kimdl93]

Dang, you girls are making me feel like a youngster at 67!

[Andy1087]

I would be so happy to get dolled up correctly and stay at home. I just wish I could I had the skills to look half way decent dressed, but alas I do not. I also envy the fact that your wife encourages your dressing.

[Ressie]

Don't look into a possible future of having your clothes taken away somehow. There's no way to really know what the future holds which includes tomorrow or even what will happen in the next few minutes. Of course as we age there will very likely be physical or mental problems that develop. So do your best to take good care of yourself now to prevent future illness.

The present is all we really have so wear whatever you want whenever possible. And don't worry so much!

[monalisa]

I can relate to what you are saying and feeling. I have built up an extensive wardrobe and recently started donating many unworn items. Still I have so many gowns and dresses that I will never wear but hate to part with them. I need to dress more and enjoy everything and maybe wear some things out.

[Alice Torn]

I am only 65 1/2 yrs, have been in good physical shape, but seldom good emotional and mental shape. Now, just recently, have a bad knee, and several expensive dental problems, and always have had trouble getting a good night 's sleep. I have no wife or kids, only animals. No close friends where i live. I could die, in my apartment, and not be discovered, until someone walking down the hallway, smells something really bad, or my rent is way late, and the manager checks. One thing i fear much, is gettin hurt badly, or serious illness, and not able to care for my pets, and my brother or sister coming here and finding my storage container full of my stash! It would be hell on earth for me!! I purged 99% of my things a few yrs or so ago, and really miss even just looking at the dresses on hangers! But, i just missed getting into a horrible traffic accident a few weeks ago, after i made a left turn onto the highway at night. I think a lot about death, as many of my friends have died off recently.