Drinking and dressing on New Years - a bad story to share

[Sandi Beech]

I cannot help but think about what happened on Jan 1 2018 now that New Year?s is approaching. This was really bad, and I doubt I will ever do anything so stupid again. I just want to share it since I know some people get depressed during the holidays and could slip into a disastrous drinking episode like this. Please learn from me - do not drink in excess.

It all started in 2017. I already have a lengthy history in my introduction so I will not repeat it all - just where necessary to make sense. 2017 was when I started traveling a lot for work. I had just been on the receiving end of my wife's wrath over my wanting to sleep in pantyhose and jockey 2018 boy shorts as pajama bottoms. That is when I mostly gave up on any dressing at home and started the expansion of dressing when away from home. In that fall, I went dressed up to an out of town bar and met a couple of lovely women in their late thirties. We spent several hours talking about everything from pantyhose to music and their new lesbian relationship. One of them had previously been married and has grown kids. Trust me; we are not the only ones with secrets to tell in gay bars. Moving on with the story, I am not really a drinker. I really only drink beer and wine, and may go a week or two without a single drink or even wanting one, but I do like to drink some in bars especially when I want to dance. The night I was hanging out with these two women, one said to me - you ever try Jack Daniels fire? I said no, so she bought the 3 of us a shot. Wow that stuff is something. It is like big red gum plus alcohol. Later, I bought the 3 of us a shot. Pretty soon we were all singing to some music being played as I laughed about it being girl?s night out. I have very fond memories of that night. They were very kind to me.

When we were at the end of the year, I was thinking about how much fun I had hanging out with them that fall, so I bought a bottle of Jack Daniels fire just to reminisce. This was a huge mistake. I was working in the garage that night and my wife was watching TV. I took a shot on my way into the garage. Then I took another going back out. At some point I guess I was feeling emboldened so I put my pantyhose and boyshorts on while my wife was in the other room. I went to get another shot and I vaguely remember thinking it would be easier to just take a swig out of the bottle. I do not remember much after that. The next thing I do remember is my wife yelling at me lying down on the floor which woke me up. Apparently I threw up all over the carpeting and was quite sick. I also remember her pulling off my hose and putting pajamas on me. It was a bad night. It was also a very bad new year?s day. I felt very ill the entire day, and let?s just say the wife was extremely POd at me. I spent a long time in the dog house over this.

After 1 day of recovery I had to try to get the smell out of the carpet which was terrible. I spent 2 hours just cleaning the carpet over and over. I really do not know how much I drank because my wife poured the bottle out, but it was way more than I should have, and then some. To this day I regret that night so much that I will likely never have anything at all to drink on new year?s. I just thought I would share this to perhaps help maybe one person not go crazy with drinking during this holiday period.

PS, I know this was stupid, and extremely dangerous, so I am not wanting to get bashed over it. I just wanted to share. This was clearly a down moment in time for me.

Sandi

[Sallee]

At least you weren't thinking about driving. You can count it as a lesson learned and a relatively cheap one.

[Micki_Finn]

I’m the king of blackout drunk. Or I was in high school. You may not remember now, but unless you had a bad reaction with medication, at SOME point you made a conscious decision to over drink. Hopefully the hangover will be enough of a deterrent going forward.

[Crissy 107]

No reason to over drink, I have done it and it is never good. Do not even think of getting behind the wheel, that is why we have Uber and Lyft. Drink smart and have some fun.

[Leslie Langford]

Sandi, I respect your courage for being so forthright about your not-so-"excellent adventure" during last year's New Year's Eve and for "owning" your bad judgement and questionable behavior at that time. Lesson learned for both yourself and others here who might be inclined to go down that same road.

But enough with the self-flagellation...at what point does your wife start to take ownership as well for treating you so shabbily so as to drive you to this point of desperation. For the "high crime" of crossdressing and wanting to wear pantyhose in her presence? Is she so virtuous, upstanding, and without skeletons in her own closet that she can act so "holier-than-thou", judgmental, and aspire to be a candidate for sainthood?

[Tracii G]

I make big mistakes if I drink whiskey so I gave that up years ago.
I woke up in the front yard covered in snow one year.
Woke up in a jail cell with my lip busted open and my right hand knuckles looking like hamburger.
My cell mate said must have been one hell of a fight I said I don't know but it feels like it was.
The arresting officer came by to check on me and he said he was glad I didn't fight with him because of the damage I did to the two other guys.
I stopped drinking that very night.
Tip: never mix whiskey with fruit or energy drinks or cinnamon.

[paulinescotlandcd]

But enough with the self-flagellation...at what point does your wife start to take ownership as well for treating you so shabbily so as to drive you to this point of desperation. For the "high crime" of crossdressing and wanting to wear pantyhose in her presence? Is she so virtuous, upstanding, and without skeletons in her own closet that she can act so "holier-than-thou", judgmental, and aspire to be a candidate for sainthood?

I am with Leslie here, jeez she needs to lighten up just a little. As for drink I gave up the stuff many years ago. The wife is not fond of drink and at most I might every six months or so have a couple of glasses of rose wine - but then i stop.

[Sandi Beech]

Incidentally I have never gotten in a car after drinking. In this case, I was working on my car so I could not drive if I wanted to. I had the 260V hybrid battery removed. Fortunately I did not fry myself.

I am not going to blame my wife for not being able to accept the whole me. I just wish I could have been one of the lucky ones with an accepting spouse. Sometimes it does get me a bit down on the whole situation, but I do not want to go down the road to the big D over it. I sat on jury duty for a divorce case one time, and I had to help divvy up 1,000,000 in assets. The guy got an old car he was restoring and his tools; that is it. I thought it was unfair, but it kind of scared me into what could happen, so I will not be pushing my luck.

Gee Tracii, that is a pretty scary story as well. Glad you were not permanently damaged. By the way, you probably heard about the stabbing in Nashville recently. I was at that same bar only a week before - it is scary what can happen.

Anyhow, like I said I really don't drink that much which may be partly why I have made some mistakes with the hard stuff. You ladies may find this really odd, but I would have been drinking beer were it not for my cheap lipstick which is so easy to make a mess with. I think it was Jessie Mae who recently posted a picture of a mug with a large lipstick print. For that reason, I have been drinking mixed drinks with straws instead of using beer bottles when going out dressed up - just to keep my lipstick from smearing. When I went shopping recently I asked an Este Lauder rep about the messy lipstick problem and she suggested I try their matt liquid lipstick. That stuff is great. I can drink out of beer bottles with no mess at all. The stuff hardly smears and I get much tighter edges with it. So it is kind of funny that going to a 29 dollar lipstick is what I needed to keep me out of trouble. Now I can stick to beer and keep out of trouble. Live and learn.

Sandi

[BrendaPDX]

WOW! Thanks for reminder. I have a tendency to over do it, so thanks.

[kimdl93]

I certainly am not going to offer any lectures on the perils of alcohol... not after all many and varied stupid, alcohol-involved mistakes I have made in my life. Sorry you had such an extremely bad experience. Not to make any excuses, but I can empathize with how one might get carried away with the combination of personal frustrations, pleasant memories and powerful drink.

[Pumped]

At least you weren't thinking about driving. You can count it as a lesson learned and a relatively cheap one.

Or lucky it didn't happen in a bar. No telling what might happen in the wrong situation.

As for alcohol, I have a few once in a while, but never had any issues having a few drinks and stopping before it got out of hand. I never drank enough to get out of control of pass out, never any fights, Never got stupid drunk. I would just get to the point of a good buzz, then quit.

I remember years ago a bunch of us went to a bar to listen to a band and dance. i knew we were going to be there all evening so i started early, have a few drinks and started drinking water about 9:00. I was pretty loopy by 9:00 and everyone else was just getting started. When the bar closed down I tried to get the car keys from the guy that was driving. He was smashed, and I was darned near sober. All he remembered was me being pretty lit up by 9:00 and figured he should drive! I finally talked him out of his keys and drove us all home.

[Sharon budd]

What is worse drinking or crossdressing? Not sure which one has given me most problems? I for one will not say don't drink, just as I would not say don't go out dressed, because it may have bad consequences. I assume we are all adults and can make our own choices. No one is going to tell me what not to do .

[Pumped]

Sure, do what ever you want, just realize there are consequences to pay if something gets out of hand because you are smashed! I can't tell you how many times people have whined to me about getting arrested, puking or blacked out drunk, or ending up in a strange bed, the list goes on. All because they can not handle their booze, but it was not their fault!:bonk:

[Angela Marie]

I enjoy a drink with dinner but that's about it. I never could understand the whole New Years drink until you drop thing.

[Helen_Highwater]

Forget New Years, combining CD'ing, especially those first time out ventures with a bit of dutch courage is a bad bad idea. Sandi's tale is one we all should take note of. If you want to dress, in whatever fashion, do it with a clear head. Stay in control, be the mistress of your own destiny. As Sandi's story illustrates, it's oh too easy for things to go pear shaped very quickly.

[LydiaL]

I am OK with dressing on New Years Eve. But I now limit the celebration to a couple/3 drinks with dinner, fall asleep on the couch about 9 PM. Wake up to the loud commotion on the television right at midnight. Say cheers and fall back to sleep.

:cheers:

(What a party pooper!)

[Stephanie47]

I've had discussions with the women in my family; daughter and granddaughter. My wife was already educated before I met her. The problem with over indulging, intentionally or unintentionally, is the loss of control and the real prospect someone will take advantage of you. This is not limited to male on female, but, also male on male or female on female. There is a totally misguided belief that in order to have fun a person must get a "buzz on." I remember that phrase from a coworker/friend who questioned why I did not want a beer at an afternoon Seattle Mariner game. In order for himself to have fun he had to have a "buzz on." As bad stories can go my wife's male cousin had way too many drinks and ended up being charged in the death of three elderly men and women who were killed by his pickup truck. He had no recollection of the accident at all. Of driving the truck. There was a witness who left the scene who said another man was driving, but, that person was nowhere to be found. He did eight years in the slammer for something he may have done or maybe not. That may be an extreme case.

There are people who intentionally get wasted. Others, who do not regularly drink end up unintentionally wasted. Sometimes a heavy drinker who may blow the legal limit has better control than a non drinker who has just one on New Year's Eve or the backyard BBQ.

As to go out en femme my self imposed rule is absolutely zero alcohol. It's bad enough to explain to your family your outfit when someone runs into you rather than you running into someone and ending up in jail or the emergency room.

In order to have fun, you do not have to drink.

[Marianne S]

Woke up in a jail cell with my lip busted open and my right hand knuckles looking like hamburger. [...]

The arresting officer came by to check on me and he said he was glad I didn't fight with him because of the damage I did to the two other guys.

Yeah, well, at least you've got SOMETHING to be proud of, right? "If you think I look bad, you ought to have seen the other two guys!" ;)


Tip: never mix whiskey with fruit or energy drinks or cinnamon.

Taken together, tastes too good to resist!

[Sandi Beech]

Hi all , well anyhow you all got the full story of what happened that night. I don?t want to tell anyone I know about all the details like the pantyhose part of the story. By the way, I don?t want to sound like it?s all bad experiences I have had. Some outings have been great so I will have to share some of those experiences as well when I have a chance. Have a happy new year next week.

Sandi

[Nadia Wren]

By the way, I don?t want to sound like it?s all bad experiences I have had.

Sandi

Over a bottle of wine, I told my SO about my dressing. Over other bottles of wine we'd dress together.
Over some White Russians and Roxy Music, I told my BF about my dressing. She didn't believe me, so the next night I brought over my stilettos and walked in them for her.
Fortunately, I've never had a bad experience dressing when alcohol was involved, but I can see where it could be a slippery slope.

[Chloe_S]

Oh my. That does sound like an awful night. I don't see how a couple of shots could get you so drunk. I hope you don't have some sort of drinking problem. :/

[Teresa]

Sandi,
Lesson learned , overthing in moderation !

I can obviously see why your wife went ballistic because it was self inflicted . I suffered at the butt end of others . A group of us were attending a dinner party , drink was flowing fairly freely , I was drinking whisky and dry ginger/water . I felt OK but as the evening wore on I began to feel very weird , not the usual build up with drink but almost total wipeout . It appeared after that the host and his friend were topping up my whisky with vodka , I also discovered that was his usual habit , to invite someone as , " Their spot of sport for the evening !" . I never went to his parties again , he wasn't aware I'd had kidney problems in the past and he could have killed me with alcohol poisoning .

[CynthiaD]

Sandi, Drinking to excess is bad no matter what you’re wearing. I’m an alcoholic, but I’ve been sober for over forty years. I still struggle with it, but for me, the only way to keep from getting sloppy drunk is not to take that first drink. Be careful.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I don't drink and dress. My daughter was arrested at a sobriety checkpoint. She was waiting for the officer to come over to check her out when she ran through the traffic cones. She claimed that she fell asleep at the wheel. I don't really know what the truth was. She flunked the field sobriety test. She had several small (8oz) open bottles of wine in the car. She said that she collected the bottles from everyone at the party as souvenirs. I believe her, but have to admit that is didn't look very good. She was arrested, handcuffed, brought before a magistrate and put in jail. She wasn't released until 10 AM the next morning.

I think the wort thing for me would be being put in jail while dressed. The jails are segregated by sex. I don't know what would be wore: being in the male jail with a dress on in the female with a dress. I don't want to experience either, so I just don't drink while dressed.

[docrobbysherry]

To drinking and dressing!:thumbsdn:

Personally? I "F" up everything for Sherry if I try to drink and dress!:doh:

[sometimes_miss]

For the "high crime" of crossdressing and wanting to wear pantyhose in her presence? Is she so virtuous, upstanding, and without skeletons in her own closet that she can act so "holier-than-thou", judgmental, and aspire to be a candidate for sainthood?
Women reserve the right of deception, and judgement of what's unacceptable, for themselves. My ex considered my crossdressing as unacceptable, as according to her, it was a 'lie by omission'. Of course her own past history of psych problems, wasn't something she felt was necessary to tell me about.


What is worse drinking or crossdressing? Not sure which one has given me most problems? I for one will not say don't drink, just as I would not say don't go out dressed, because it may have bad consequences. I assume we are all adults and can make our own choices. No one is going to tell me what not to do .
Crossdressing, or altering the gender image that she was attracted to, is unfortunately something that can destroy any sexual attraction that a woman feels for us. Many women can accept adultery, even murder as acceptable in a mate, as long as he's still 'a real, masculine man', because she still has that underlying animal sexual attraction to him. But change the masculinity by being a crossdresser? Oh, no, that changes everything. And once the sexual attraction is gone, the romantic love can easily follow. Then, she will seek another male to support her feeling of being a desireable female, and that male won't be you. Once the romantic love is gone, often, so is the marriage/relationship.


Oh my. That does sound like an awful night. I don't see how a couple of shots could get you so drunk.
It all depends on tolerance. If you never drink, a few shots can easily get you quite intoxicated.