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Wendy me
01-23-2020, 08:03 AM
I go every were with my wife as you know she is a cancer patient. And I do everything with her from doctors treatments to helping her with issues with her treatments.. we shop for groceries to clothing...

Somewhere abought two years ago we started buying for Wendy yoga pants and leggings cute pantries and tops ...actually it started before my back surgery... braletts ( without breast forms I am a 36 c ) and sports bras and I have a lot of fun being at all times at least pantries and a bra ..
My wife is real ok with this .
Now she tells me to do my makeup I have dark circles under my eyes .I have long blonde hair and
Because of her chemo she is thinning and wears a baseball cap...I do too with my ponytail sticking out the back ....

Her only problem is that when someone says hello ladies I don?t correct them..
When we have someone say hello ladies... she looks at me like say something then she goes you want to be a girl don?t you....I say something like I love to be your husband and also your girlfriend....

So what?s a cd trany husband do do I tone it down a bit or what ?

cdinmd206
01-23-2020, 08:10 AM
Since you say she is a cancer patient, and she is ok with you dressing then I say you do whatever pleases her. It is nice to be thought of as female but you wife's feeling come first

Teri Ray
01-23-2020, 08:14 AM
It is wonderful that you are doing so well at taking care of your wife. Sounds like you both are enjoying life and your wife sounds wonderful. I would recommend that you both have a serious talk and find where your boundaries lie. Open honest conversation is always a good thing and will provide improved understanding for both of you. Best wishes to you both.

Stephanie47
01-23-2020, 10:25 AM
I went through the entire breast cancer regime with my wife; chemo, surgery and then radiation. Several things usually seem to crop up during during treatment. For many women they identify greatly with their hair. I cannot explain it. Maybe it's natural for a guy to lose his hair over time. For women it can be traumatic. My wife could not stand her hair thinning and had her head shaved by a friend. Never went uncovered during the entire treatment. Some people when they go through a medical crisis come to realization "don't sweat the small stuff." She may be feeling as if she is losing her femininity, while your femininity is being enhanced and acknowledged.

It's a personal thing, but, I think my wife wanted her husband along for the ride and not a girl friend.

Robertacd
01-23-2020, 10:46 AM
So your wife is okay with you dressing and even days to wear makeup, but she is concerned about you wanting to be a woman?

Mixed messages much?

kimdl93
01-23-2020, 11:17 AM
It seems that question should be directed towards your wife. Thus far, you say she is real ok with it...ask her if she is real ok with you being ok with being seen as a woman.

Micki_Finn
01-23-2020, 11:52 AM
You tell your wife that you’d rather not embarrass the poor worker who made an honest mistake in misgendering you.

alwayshave
01-23-2020, 08:23 PM
Wendy, since she is fighting cancer, I'd do what ever makes her happy. Correct people for her.

Angie G
01-23-2020, 09:13 PM
Make tour wife happy at any cost. :hugs:
Angie

Crissy 107
01-23-2020, 10:31 PM
Wendy, since she is fighting cancer, I'd do what ever makes her happy. Correct people for her.

A lot of good responses here but I think Jamie and Danielle hit the nail on the head.

docrobbysherry
01-23-2020, 10:32 PM
Whatever 2 people do stay happy and together is fair, Wendy!:thumbsup:

Cding, cancer, whatever. It's only the 2 of you's business!:hugs:

Bobbi46
01-24-2020, 05:14 AM
Wendy the main thing here is to make sure your wife is happy at all times CD'ing can to an extent go on the back burner to ensure the happiness continues, just be you but be mindful to even maybe match her fashion style without trying to out do her.

Wendy me
01-24-2020, 05:30 PM
As some have said it’s all about my wife I agree 100% with that .today was a chemo day getting ready to go she said can I wear your sweater?i said yes any thing you want .... I asked her if it really bothers her that we get read as two ladies when we go out ...she said I worry that you want to be a girl... I told her I would do whatever she wants even dressing more male ... I just want you happy.... she told me that’s ok she just over thinks things ... tomorrow we are going shopping for some sweaters for her ....

Hell I would quit my fem side for her ...I know it never goes away but I would try for her

SaraLin
01-25-2020, 07:44 AM
And THAT is love.

And that she doesn't ask you to quit - shows her love for you.