Crossdressing at school frowned upon

[MsEva]

Hello all,
This news event hit the local TV stations and newspapers this week. I had to dig around to find it. They interviewed the student who wore a gown to school here in VA. He said he does not know why he likes to wear women's clothing he just does. The school freaked out and sent him home. His friends came to his defense.
Crossdressing Article
http://www.dailypress.com/news/local/middlepeninsula/dp-94278sy0mar28,0,1016642.story?coll=dp-news-local-mp

Sorry I do not know how to make a link for it. Perhaps a Mod could link the address.:happy:

[TGMarla]

I like the fact that the administration suggested to make the whole thing into a learning opportunity. I do not think that the school acted improperly. They are simply reflective of society at large, where a girl wearing a necktie is not questioned, but a dress on a male is. Women have been wearing some form of neckwear for centuries, like ribbons, bows, necklaces, chokers, et al. The jump to a tie is not a large one. But dresses are decidedly feminine in their nature. The dress he was wearing was black with sequins. Most decidedly feminine. There is never any question when one see a dress, that it is a garment that is intended for women. Yeah, yeah, I know.....kilts have been around for centuries, too. The traditional Greek military uniform is a kind of dress.... Let's face it, though. The school simply felt that it was not ready for this kind of thing, and I'm not going to chastize them for it. But it's pretty cool that it came to a head like it did!

[Lawren]

I can agree with the young man about making a point that the school's dress code needs to be amended but I think he went a bit overboard also. I think he could have made the point just as well by wearing a casual dress instead of a formal gown. That would have drawn less attention to the issue but would somewhat invalidate the school's argument about being disruptive. For a time it would be disruptive to a point, especially in the classrooms but not so much in the hallways. He would have blended in much better. Furthermore, in the classroom it is part of the teacher's responsibility to ensure that all students are paying attention which, in theory, would prevent disruptions of class. I think the school did react quite well as a whole but the issue still needs a lot of work but these things always do.

As for me, I am thankfull that these young people have the courage to force these issues. In the end it will make things better for us.

[Kimberley]

I think the school (typically) overreacted and created a bigger situation for themselves in doing so.

I am actually more interested in the event itself. Is this the beginning of the tides of change?

We have already seen some cross dressing between young couples in high school and I dont believe that has been challenged, so if there are no safety issues with that, how is there a safety issue here? Oh yeah, a dress is different.... forgot about that.

Just a few thoughts on societal hypocrasy.

Kimberley

[Teresa Amina]

So that's why it's called a "Dress" code!:D The times they are a changin'- back in the Olden Days (early 1970's) I would have been scared for my life to do that. Go Kid!

[Aileen]

I think the school has a right to ask for a certain amount of conformity from the kids. Children are little terrorists, after all, and it's not like a work situation.

[Megan_Renee]

Sorry, I have to dissent. I believe that they acted inappropriately. They have nothing in their dress code (I would presume, although some schools do mention it) prohibiting a boy in a dress. They have nothing in their dress code prohibitng the wearing of a pretty dress. If he would have worn a nice skirt suit, I'm sure they would have reacted exactly the same. The point is that they did not allow him to wear something completely within the confines of their dress code. Most schools have a simple dress code that prohibits revealing or offensive (clothes with swearing, etc) clothing.

The fact that he was wearing a dress is no big deal. Could he wear some nice slacks with a tight-cut blouse and breast forms without a problem? He would be within the dress code, there is nothing prohibiting breat forms (almost a garuntee here) in the code. What's the big deal?

I agree that they were just acting normally, but to use this as a teaching moment is probably a euphamism for "We'll make an example out of this student."

A few years back a school did ban cross-dressing. There was a cross-dressing school spirit day that was banned by the school after some parents flipped out at their son borrowing (ok, so he didn't ask) his mother's skirt for the event.

Anyway, I applaud this student, and I hope that they sue the school for discrimination.

Megan

[Shelby]

I work in a school from time to time dealing with the kids. First, Kids tend to believe that "it's all about me." It is natural for teens to push the envelope at this age. I listen to their big concerns and think how childish they sound. In 10 years they will realize how pathetic it all seemed. I remember when girls were wearing a shirt that had no backs - just a few tie strings. The schools banned those type of shirts as they were distracting and not safe. I'm a good guy, but even I couldn't stop from staring at their braless bare backs and think sexual thoughts. I once saw a cheerleaders skirt get hung up on the back of her desk chair without her realizing it. So I enjoyed that class and didn't pay attention to the teacher. I garuentee that a guy wearing a sequined gown sitting anywheres in a classroom is going to be a distraction.

Is this kid right about the policy - yes. He should have the right to wear a dress to school. Is it safe, maybe not if some kids decide they want to beat him up over it. A girl wears a provacative piece of clothing or lack of and it can bring out the worst in men. I think a more conservative choice of clothes would have made a better point. If you're trying to dress like the girls, then dress like the girls, like a demin skirt and a girly looking shirt.

The school, had to do what it felt was right as did he. Its a lesson learned by all. There was great epidode of Boston Public wear a boy was a TV. He was nominated for prom queen and won. Some girls took offense because he was guy horning in on their chances to win. The principle let him attend in a gown because they could not discriminate against who he was and the fact the student body nominated and elected him to win, not as a joke, but legit.

[Bernice]

well... maybe I was nuts, but I went to the student website, registered on the forum, and provided a wealth of factual reference material for their cause.

I hope they do teach the board some diversity tolerance. Kids are the future. Education is the key. I hear this all the time. So now seemed the time to practice what they preach.

Hugs,

Bernice

[Tina Dixon]

I just think it great that so many kids stood up for him, there is hope yet.

[ReginaK]

Sequins are a bit much for school. Had he stuck with something a little more conservative, he may have slipped under the radar.

I'm not saying he doesn't have the right to dress in sequins at school though. I completely support him.

[eleventhdr]

Exactly what we are fighting for. discrimination againest us male's being able to dress as we please. If female's girls can wear our clothing as hey now have for quite some time then why the heck can we not wear what is still considered girls clothing it is time for us to be allowed to wear what is most comfortable for us as well. Since female's consider what has been our clothing much more comfortable for them then the same does apply for us just as well.
We need to win this right right now indeed. I say we just take it it is our's and wating is not going to get it!:.

Suzy!:.

[Miriannah]

Part of me actually agrees with the school's decision, depending on what the area is like anyway. Most highschool kids are complete assholes, and I could easily see some homophobic jackass beating that poor guy up over it.

The act of him wearing the dress obviously is no big deal, and he should have the right to, but at the same time, he needs to consider the consequences that doing so might invoke. It's not like fighting/beating someone up in school has any real penalties, unlike the adult world. :(

I think that's what they meant by a 'learning experience' to be perfectly honest.

[ashlee chiffon]

it would have been better wearing a grey pleated skirt, white blouse *opaque so the white bra doesn't show*, white calf length socks, black maryjanes, white panties, and a grey sweather...no makeup, and clear nail polish..
proper schoolgirl attire!!! should end the distraction from individual style dressing! :rolleyes:

[Helen MC]

Over here in the UK in most schools, especially co-ed State Schools, girls have had the option for 15 years or so of wearing trousers (pants) in the school uniform colour for example grey or navy blue or the more conventional skirt in such colours instead. Boys have never been given that option. This is another example of the duel standard in clothing polices.

The problem is that a girl, even if she was wearing trousers for sexual reasons, can claim that she is doing so for comfort, warmth or modesty reasons, and these will be accepted without any question. She is also unlikely to be abused in any way by other pupils be they girls or boys for wearing trousers. In contrast a boy wearing a skirt to school, even if it is exactly the same colour , style and length as the girl pupils would wear as part of their uniform, would be automatically considered to be doing so for sexual reasons and would also be open to abuse by pupils of both genders. The closest a boy in a UK school could get to wearing a skirt is if he wore a kilt as some Scots lads do, and where it was perfectly acceptable for him to wear girls' school knickers in navy blue or bottle green, maroon, etc under it rather than boys' underpants. I also understand that at a Boarding School in England called Christ's Hospital both the Girls and Boys wear ankle length cassocks when in school although I don't know if they wear only their panties or underpants under these. I wonder what would happen if a Boy from an ethnic community wanted to wear a sarong or some apparently female type of garment to school. Would this be permitted in a State School?

[mskilmer]

The school did over react, in my opinion. They were just thinking of his safety? Riiiight. So nobody gets picked on or beat up for being different in OTHER ways at that school? Doubt it. You know ... as I read this article I kept thinking about interracial policy back in the 70's when I was in school. Students were allowed to kiss at school, but an interracial couple was not allowed. It was considered to be something that might instigate trouble ... same excuse as was used in this cross dressing article. Making a big fracas out of the issue only makes it more likely to be disruptive.

Having said that ... I do have sympathy for the school officials. Can you imagine having to "walk the line" with all the parents ... about ANY issue?! There's really no way to make everybody happy ... so you gotta go with mediocrity. It would be better to do the RIGHT thing, as you see it, and take the heat. But that seldom happens.

I applaud the student and his friends. I think he did a wonderful thing. Yes, I have a kid who will start high school next year. He's had some dress code "issues". I told him if he EVER get's kicked out of school for wearing innapropriate clothes ... I'll pay him $10 for having the self confidence to do it. He's a great kid.

I know ... I'm a poor role model ... I'm a bad parent ... yadayadayada ...

[AnnaMaria]

Because both my parents are teachers I can see both sides of the situation. While I don't feel the school had the right to send the boy home because of what he was wearing, I don't think the boy should have been quite so obvious about the situation. I agree that he should have choosen something a little more approperate for the setting.

The biggest problem is in the fact that there has already been some bad press about this type of thing because of the school that ban crossdressing as a result of parental outrage and the school board is probably going to do the same thing to try and prevent future problems with parents. They are looking to protect themselves more than the children they are suppose to be educating.

I think that it is great that the students were supportive of their friend in spite of the fact that they undoubtedly know that they are going against societial norms to do so. It makes me think that the new generation is learning some tollerance that we didn't get the chance to learn ourselves. God knows if I had done something like that when I was in high school I would have been sent to the hospital or worse by the backward a** country f**ks that I went to school with. And yes I say that with all seriousness, because that is exactly what they were. I went to a county school that was 9 miles out of town and was populated by farmers kids and rich kids whose parents were professionals of some sort or another. I am just glad that the father in question was willing to allow his son the opportunity to express himself without freaking out. The only other question that I have about the situation is where did the student get the dress and what does the mother have to say about the situation. Did he borrow it from mom or what.

OK I have ranted enough

Anna