What does Cding mean to you!

[sparks]

Hello! Troubled soul here these days! I'm trying to find out maybe too much to fast! And my head hurts under the pressure! A wonderful girl once asked me "what does CDing mean to me!"
Well I can't put my finger on it! It has meant many different things to me in the past and even now in the Present! It has erotic, it has been escapeism, it has been secretive and yes hurtful! It is had to nuture this part of myself when I'm forever shutting it down!
I haven't fully dressed in seven years and in someways it has been good not too! In other ways to surpress something that has been there in me since at least age four is tough on ones soul!
The last couple months here have been fantastic as I've let at least part of myself loose and rampant! On the other hand as another girl has to me she has just rushed into things to fast! Yep that's me diving in without a thought of water in the pool!
Mel I miss you! and CG hang in there!
To the rest of you girls if you don't mind baring your yourself alittle I ask
What does CDing mean to you?!?

[Casey Morgan]

Sparks, I know what you mean about things going too fast. Sometimes I find myself desperate to find the "right" adjective(s) to describe myself. Then I go play solitaire for awhile and come back here when the fuzziness lifts.

To me CDing is a validation of all those things that had always been "wrong" with me. I was equally happy playing street football with the guys as playing Mother May I with my sister and her friends. Now, at least on an intellectual level, I know there's nothing wrong with me. I'm just different than most folks.

It means that even though I represent a different aspect of society, I still represent society. I'm not a "them" anymore. Every group needs members to fulfill different roles. Whatever the heck I am, hear me roar.

It means I can work on (possibly) the last piece of accepting myself. That trip started the day I clicked the Register button on this site. It means that sometimes I just have to admit that I don't fully know who I am because I never let myself find out. It means I really do have the courage to step back and take a good look at myself. It means that I also have the obligation to do so.

It means that I'm not just physically a person anymore, I'm mentally and emotionally a person too.

[Marla S]

Julie has pretty good summed up the development in this thread.
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27131
The more self-accaptence growth and the more the sexual aspect diminishes, the more it becomes a wonderfull experience of self-awareness, as well as awareness for others.

If there weren't all these constrains due to acceptance and stuff, it would be pure joie de vivre.

So, I think it means pretty much.:happy:

[Aileen]

It feels sexy wearing pantyhose. I would say we probably enjoy wearing dresses and pantyhose and high heels for the same reason women do.

[Julie Avery]

To me, crossdressing means doing something that's very much a part of me, and always has been since my first glimmerings of a sense of "being engendered".

I love feeling a breeze on my shaved legs and saying "yes, I like this," and not feeling bad about it. I love imagining that I'm on the "feminine" side of the great gender divide.

It means breaking the bonds of stereotypes to which I've always felt compelled to conform - uncomfortably! - and saying "yow, this is awesome!"

Fishing, football, baseball, all the "guy" things I used to enjoy are still fun to me. They're fun, but not meaningful to me in the same way that crossdressing is. When I crossdress, I am myself. And so very often, in public, I am not myself.

Unlike adolescents, I have no illusions that life on earth goes on forever. And I know what makes me happy. I'd like to do as much of what makes me happy as I can, while I still have time.

Funny thing is, I could swear that the more I do that, the kinder and gentler I become toward others. I kid you not.

[Jenni]

To me, it means being able to express my true inner self, and not feeling the stress of deception. It means being able to wear soft things with my fave colors, and smelling nice. It's the only time I can say I'm truly relaxed, and at peace with myself.

[Robyn2006]

Spent so many years in denial, thinking that this would become a thing of a silly past. But it wouldn't let go... and I'm now so glad that it didn't, for it it had I never could have possibly felt complete. The plain truth of it is that only when I'm completely dressed as the woman I long to be, as I am now typing these words, do I feel I'm myself, every other moment of my life is becoming more and more some pretense of a life society has laid out for me, hardly a life that depicts who I really am. But gladly I'm far more now rushing towards my womanhood than running away from it.

Robyn

[Adrienne Heels]

I think crossdressing to me is becoming the person I really want to be. I want to be the pretty working mom secretary type I dress as. A lot of this may have to do with my mom always saying to me she really wanted a daughter.

[Teresa Amina]

Wow, I suppressed it for years but always there was that Other self leaking through. Now things have opened up for All of me and it is really overwhelming on occaision. What does cding mean to me? Being All of myself, not just that functional day-to-day self that gets too paranoid about what the World will do if I'm just Me.

[Jolene]

To me, it means being able to express my true inner self, and not feeling the stress of deception. It means being able to wear soft things with my fave colors, and smelling nice. It's the only time I can say I'm truly relaxed, and at peace with myself.

I agree Jenni and with most of what the others have posted here. We all have our reasons and feelings about what crossdressing means to us and it is nice to chat about them here together ... Jolene

[Lawren]

That's a tough question to answer but I will try to be brief.
CDing is a change of persona. An expression of freedom to be the individual that I am. I have always been "politically incorrect" and CDing fits into that as well. It is also the wonderfull feeling of wearing clothing that is, to me, soft, silky, sexy, and sensuously comfortable. CDing is another opportunity for me to be, secretly, unique among my friends. Yes, there is also a sexual side to CDing for me but I have somewhat gotten passed that stage. CDing is also an experience that releases both mind and body from the everyday stresses of life because I can briefly step into a fantasyland of my own devising.
Wow! I could probably ramble on forever on this subject but I will spare you the agony. :cheeky:

[Kordia]

CDing to me has always allowed me to be the fantasy girl of my dreams! I read some members replys that say they have "gotten by" the sexual aspects of CDing. Wow! I have been cding since around age 6 and it still gives me a powerfully erotic charge while getting dressed, putting on makeup and prancing around in a sexy pair of heels in front of a mirror and letting my mind be a fantasy playground for as long as possible!