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View Full Version : Big step today - going out fully dressed in daylight for the first time



JennyUK
12-05-2020, 05:03 PM
I took a big step today. I went out just after noon fully dressed, and wearing make-up. I've never done this before. I've been out in the car in the evening and gone shopping at the supermarket, but never during the day.

I made the decision to go and get some groceries from a local mini market. I will admit, wearing the mask helped, but I had spent time ensuring my make-up was on point.

From parking the car to entering the store, there were a handful of people around. Nobody looked twice or if they "made" me, they just went on with their business. The same thing happened in the store.
I grabbed what I needed, paid the cashier, and left without incident.

A few doors away there's a charity (thrift) shop - I went in and browsed the women's clothing, and purchased two new tops. The lady at the counter looked at me and smiled, and she said "those will look good on you".

I'm sure she knew I was CD, but she didn't care, and was ever so pleasant.

I returned home with a new found confidence. It's surprised me how easy it was, to walk with a positive stride and just act normal (I wasn't nervous), and it's opened a door to me that I have wanted to walk through for a while.

I'm feeling really good tonight!

cindylouho
12-05-2020, 05:23 PM
Congratulaions Jenny, just bask in the afterglow girl.

Robertacd
12-05-2020, 05:25 PM
I am happy for you, it gets easier every time.

kayegirl
12-05-2020, 05:35 PM
Great news Jenny. I'm on the Yorkshire Lancashire border and often make trips across the line. I've never had a single negative experience in Lancashire.
Kaye

JennyUK
12-05-2020, 06:00 PM
Great news Jenny. I'm on the Yorkshire Lancashire border and often make trips across the line. I've never had a single negative experience in Lancashire.
Kaye

I'm close to West Yorkshire, in Oldham. My bravery continued, I went to a local Chinese takeaway to collect an order this evening, again no problems.

Stevie Allyn
12-05-2020, 06:05 PM
Well done Jenny. I wish I was as brave as you. One day, maybe.

sara_also
12-05-2020, 06:29 PM
you should feel good. You have now opened the door to a whole new world.
hope you have a wonderful life.
Sara

JennniferMcC
12-05-2020, 07:19 PM
Well done! Your world just got larger!😊

Samm
12-05-2020, 08:19 PM
Congratulations Jenny!
The hardest part is changing back

Lana Mae
12-05-2020, 08:32 PM
Congrats! Now you have been out it just gets easier! Enjoy! Best wishes on your journey! Hugs Lana Mae

JennyUK
12-05-2020, 08:42 PM
Well done! Your world just got larger!😊

After my venture out today, I know I can now go out as Jenny for so many mundane things, and that makes me happy. Collecting takeaway food, parcels, putting fuel in the car, so many everyday things. My main take from today is that people are so self-absorbed, they don't even really notice what or who is around them, staring into their phones, or just in a rush.

The biggest hurdle was my nosey neighbours, but today I have just decided to walk out and get in the car with confidence. If they do notice and figure things out, nothing is going to happen other than they label me or come up with their own theories as to who the "female" is at my house.

GracieRose
12-05-2020, 09:03 PM
Congratulations for getting over that first hurdle. Isn't it a great feeling? It always makes me happy.
I see you are expanding with your new found confidence. Enjoy!!!

Princess29
12-05-2020, 09:27 PM
onwards and upwards from here

Natalie5004
12-05-2020, 10:38 PM
Jenny, That is my experience exactly. Nobody cares.

Debs
12-06-2020, 05:22 AM
Ive found nobody really cares as long as your not entering into there space or interacting with them without invitation, just be aware of gangs of young ones, avoid, they will pick on anything slightly out of the norm.

Teresa
12-06-2020, 07:00 AM
Jenny,
I was going to say it's like falling off a log , once out there you wonder what all the fuss was about BUT I know it's not as easy as that . Gaining the confidence for the first time isn't easy , 101 things go through your mind . The important thing is getting your look right , making sure the makeup works without looking OTT , too much makeup beautifully applied can attreact more attention . Obviously wearing clothes that are appropriate is important .

As for being read as a guy or a CDer try turning it round and think you're being read as a woman , when you do you find you stop glancing over your shoulder looking for a reaction . Neighbours aren't a problem for me but it can be different if you have to consider a wife/partner , when I moved to my new home after my separation I introduced myself straight away and informed them I was TG and in the future I would appear as a woman , now they are all very normal with me .

Getting down to mundane things means you are comfortable with your situation , I admit it took me a while to mow my lawns and openly garden but now I don't see anything as an obstacle .

Well done , it can only get better .

Beverley Sims
12-06-2020, 10:18 AM
Jenny, I always like to hear about first steps especially when they work as well as yours.

Yes the world is your oyster now.

JaclynL61
12-06-2020, 10:24 AM
Congrats Jenny. It's such a great feeling to just go about your normal activities enfemme.

Angela Marie
12-06-2020, 05:27 PM
Congratulations. I remember the trepidation when I went out in the day for the first time. As someone said it gets easier. Congrats again, May you enjoy the experience many times more.

JennyUK
12-06-2020, 07:43 PM
Following yesterday's venture, I did the same again today. Wow, it really is that easy and so liberating. Today I went for groceries, and went for a brief walk about.

No issues, I was around people and nobody seemed to notice me or care. This is a game-changer for me, I'm now able to be happier knowing that I can choose to go out.

Due to my family commitments, I will be in male mode a lot of the time (my family is an obstacle to coming out publicly), but I'm happy with my first steps.

Thank you all for your lovely replies, it's encouraging and it's nice to hear the support from people like me.

Stevie Allyn
12-06-2020, 07:54 PM
And thank you Jenny for sharing your story. It's encouraging me to be more visible - currently I'm just wearing a femme top and bra with skinny jeans when out walking the dogs. So far people don't seem to notice or care - they're far more interested in the dogs or the brand of welly boots I wear!

Amelia_Rose
12-06-2020, 08:12 PM
Congratulations Jenny and thank you for sharing! I hope some day I can do the same...it's definitely something I want to experience, once I've gained the skill and confidence to do so safely.

Sometimes Steffi
12-06-2020, 11:35 PM
Congratulations Jenny, and many happy returns.

I felt the same fear going out the first time as you did, but it was so liberating.

I'm sure you'll remember this day forever and ask yourself why it took you so long to get up the "muffins" to do it.

adelinapa
12-07-2020, 12:30 AM
It's such a big step, someday I hope you can kinda laugh about how difficult it felt in the moment.

luuv2dress
12-07-2020, 02:22 AM
Congratulations, it’s always the little steps that lead to greater things. Continue to enjoy your outings more and more

prene
12-07-2020, 04:16 AM
Great job.

I did it first the same way ... it get easier and easier.

Krisi
12-07-2020, 10:46 AM
My main take from today is that people are so self-absorbed, they don't even really notice what or who is around them, staring into their phones, or just in a rush.

That gets posted here all the time, but in reality, it is not always the case. People notice (I know I do and so does my wife), but they are too polite to say anything. Most of the people, that is. There is a current thread from a girl who went out to a casino dressed a little more provocatively than she probably should have been and had to endure a lot of comments and laughs.

For me, the real problem is my voice. Like most of us, I don't sound like a woman when I talk and my attempts at a female voice are pretty weak.

I suppose having to wear a mask helps us to disguise our real identity, but this will pass eventually.

Helen_Highwater
12-07-2020, 01:49 PM
Jenny,

Once that genie is out of it's bottle there's no putting it back and why would you? It's far too much fun. Have you any things that you'd like to do while enfemme, hurdles to overcome? I remember the first time I used the women's changing rooms to try something on as being a nervy few moments but it's just a matter of acting with confidence like so many other things.

Sandra_Dodds
12-07-2020, 03:22 PM
For me, the real problem is my voice. Like most of us, I don't sound like a woman when I talk and my attempts at a female voice are pretty weak.


I've only mingled among people during the daylight twice and speaking is the part I fear most. I've been tempted to go into a convenience store and purchase a drink just for the thrill of presenting to another person but I haven't summoned the nerve out of fear they'll engage me in conversation. Well done Jenny for doing that.

JennyUK
12-07-2020, 04:39 PM
I've only mingled among people during the daylight twice and speaking is the part I fear most. I've been tempted to go into a convenience store and purchase a drink just for the thrill of presenting to another person but I haven't summoned the nerve out of fear they'll engage me in conversation. Well done Jenny for doing that.

The cashier at the convenience store was a young man, probably 25 at most. He must have known from my voice that I was CD, but he was just polite and professional, so well done him!