The little things we have to remember

[CharlotteCD]

There are so many little things that can get us caught, and I was discussing the kind of checks I have to do with a friend, and she was totally blown away - apparently she was feeling a sweat just thinking about how stressful it is.

Thought maybe it might be a good thread to have some examples, and maybe some of the things that have been noticed. I'm not thinking clothes, because they're a dead obvious giveaway - i'm thinking the unusual things that we need to keep on top of.

- Lipstick marks on mugs or glasses
- Unusual colour hair around the house or in a hairbrush
- Wig caps, which are really easy to drop
- Earrings and earring backs. I wear magnetics, and they are a nightmare!
- Buttons on outfits, which can easily pop if you've put on a few COVID lbs.
- Makeup brushes, which are round, and therefore roll away!
- High heel marks on the floor


Any others?

[Star01]

You can add eyebrow pencils falling out of my laundry basket.

[Helen_Highwater]

Marks on the skin left by a bra, holdups or those left on feet by strappy heels. As for wig caps, they can leave a mark across your forehead if you're not careful.

[darla_g]

occupational hazards?

[CharlotteCD]

Opinion was that those of us who are successful in hiding in plain sight are like undercover spies. I can see that comparison :heehee:

[Cheryl T]

Don't forget those who wore mom's or sis' clothes.

Put everything back EXACTLY where it came from.
Make sure there are no marks from deodorant in the underarm areas.
God forbid you get a run wearing Her stockings.

[Stephanie47]

Marks on the skin left by a bra, holdups or those left on feet by strappy heels. As for wig caps, they can leave a mark across your forehead if you're not careful.

Helen, I had to chuckle at this although when it happened to me in the mid 1960's it was traumatic. I dabbled in my mother's lingerie draw. I love her open bottom girdles. Loved the tight feel as it held up a pair of her stockings. She and my brother and sister were gone for the day to upstate New York. I wore her girdle all morning. When I took it off in the late morning it was "oh, shit." The seams were imbedded on my skin. I had an appointment for a physical to work a part time job for the United Parcel Service. I spent as much time as possible kneading my skin trying to remove those lines. I really did not know if I was successful as I could not see my butt at the physical. It was a thorough physical......I did not get the job. See other postings on what is was like to wear women's clothing in the 1960's.

[SherriePall]

And my problem: press-on (and even glued-on) nails popping off into some black hole to be found by your better half. Cheryl, you could write those for SO's, too, before telling.

[docrobbysherry]

Which is why DADT properly discussed and organized, can be so freeing!:):thumbsup:

[Sandi Beech]

I had a false eyelash fall off one time and tore the house up looking for it. It is something that would be hard to explain seeing how my wife has never worn any before.

Sandi

[Krisi]

Before I introduced my wife to my little "hobby", she went out of town for a week. Before she returned I had to clean the house in case of any of those little giveaways and then make it messy again so she wouldn't know I had vacuumed. ;)

It's so much better now.

[Pumped]

Charlotte, it sounds like you are in a just don't relationship instead af DADT. My feelings are DADT has some "grace" for the missed clothing or jewelry. DADT to me she knows but doesn't want to see you dressed. It is damned hard to keep it all undercover.

[CharlotteCD]

It's certainly DADT rather than Don't. I am very confident that I left an office style dress out recently - either she put it away, or I put it in a very unusual place, and I am so OCD that I wouldn't have put it where I did. She didn't say anything, and we've been fine.

[Geena75]

My 'cover ups' included clearing the snow off the deck (I enjoy stepping out, even in winter, and having a smoke and looking at my reflection in the sliding glass doors) so the heel prints won't show, watching for make up dust, and trying to clean the wash cloth from washing off the make up. I do most all the laundry, so when there are make up stains on the neck of my undershirt, she won't see. When I wash my work clothes, I toss in the panties, but have to be sure to put the clothes in, and take them out of the dryer myself.

[Territx]

Interesting topic for some of us. A number of these are all too familiar, as I have had close calls with several: the eyelashes/missing stick on nail, the marks on the skin (bra straps, corset marks, and the wig cap line), etc.

I wish I didn't have the issue but that is a discussion for another thread.

[DianeT]

In an attempt to make a useful contribution to that important topic, here is a list of severe bloopers that will give you away even to the most unsuspecting wife:
- Remembering your wife's birthday
- Selecting your wife's Netflix profile and only realizing after a minute
- Remembering that the Smiths are coming for dinner tonight
- Nailing a color or floral pattern match
- Putting a Kleenex box and a bottle of water in your car (a classic that works it's magic even without the spare pair of pantyhose in the glove compartment)
- Noticing your wife's new haircut
- Making a detour to avoid a walk in a park at 3am
- Leaving your jeans pockets empty
- Remembering which dress your wife wore the day before
Stay away from these glaring mistakes that
will tell you every single time.
You've been warned!

[Karren H]

Leaving a pair of heels and a bra in the wardrobe.... that did it....

[Sometimes Steffi]

Having sequins fall off a dress and hide in the carpet. They only reflect light from one direction, which makes them particularly hard to find.

Clothing tags that escape.

[Jillcder]

The bra and waist clincher marks can be challenging I also made the mistake in the early dressing years of dressing before a dermatologist appointment and was panicking over the bra marks on my shoulders since then I of course bought a property fitting bra to help eliminate the marks. Makeup dust in the extra bathroom also caught my wife?s attention when she was cleaning the sink I told her I had no idea what that red colored dust was.

[Christie ann]

Those early breast forms ( 2 baggies filled with rice) left out. Or, mascara even days later she can just feel it’s presence.

[Teri Ray]

I have had many of those "oh heck I missed that" moments like others have mentioned ....lost nails, long hairs on the brush, lipstick marks on a glass but my worst fail was not completely removing eyeliner and mascara . My daughters came over after a dressing session and asked.....dad are you wearing mascara? Well I some how created the excuse of all time and got away with it.

But over the years I have hundreds of "tells" and am so happy that I finally had "the talk" and no longer have to hide the evidence of my desires. I am one lucky person to have a wife who makes effort to understand my desire and still loves me.

[Tammy Lynn Tx]

I have a helpful and supportive wife and I buy her clothing ocassionslly. when she wears them out and her friends ask where she got it, she isn't bashful about telling them that I got it for her. She says I have a better taste in clothes for her than she does. She asked me ( ages ago) how I do it, it's easy I pick out clothes I think would look good on her.

[Alexis00]

Opinion was that those of us who are successful in hiding in plain sight are like undercover spies. I can see that comparison :heehee:At work when a woman stops by your desk to ask, “Do you have eye shadow on?”

And then going to the bathroom and discovering yes, you do still have blue eye shadow you somehow didn’t remove last night.....

[Teresa]

Charlotte,
I remember well the tell tale marks of a bra and suspender belt, they do take a while to disappear .
I was caught out by badly removed makeup .
Shaved body parts , very hard to disguise .
Errant earrings , if they could talk they'd be shouting , " look at me I'm hiding under this chair !"
Going for a drive and panic sets in when were're miles from home , " What if I break down or someone runs into me ?"

It feels so good to have all that behind me , I guess you could call it a " Bootcamp " for CDers , I did my training and passed with flying colours !

Steffi,
The point about sequins is an ineteresting one . The Klass company and I would guess others now give a disclaimer about the shedding of sequins . A SA in the Klass shop was telling it came about because an irrate husband complained when the dress of a lady he was having a fling with left sequins on his clothes , his wife eventually divorced him .

[CharlotteCD]

I have unending sympathy for a cd'er caught due to a shed sequin, but a cheating spouse? Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. No sympathy here.

[Teresa]

Charlotte,
The company still chose to cover their backs .

To add to that story , I was in the Klass shop looking for sequined tops , the SA brought about a dozen different ones and finally a dress , by the time I'd tried all the tops on I was covered in sequins , my hair , my makeup , the floor was like shimmering snow flakes . I asked why she'd brought the dress in silver and blue , she winked and said because it will suit you , how right she was , so I bought it along with one top . I wore the dress to our Xmas party and loved it so much I bought the gold and black version as well in the sales

[Beverley Sims]

As for bra marks, I have permanent indentations around my chest, a result of a tight bra over too many years.

That is difficult to hide if I ever need medical treatment. :-)

[MargaretJ]

I have a lovely, sparkly, silver dress, that whenever I wear it, leaves bits of glitter all over the place. My pre-prepared answer in case anyone asks is, "oh I was in the attic looking for something, and moved the box with the Christmas decorations".:D

[KristyPa]

The first thing that came to me was press on nails. Almost every time I wore them i would lose one. The most common way I would lose one would be while running my fingers through my hair to get the look I wanted. Then it was pure panic trying to find it one time while driving i looked the the mirror and seen a nail stuck to my hair.

After i said no more press or glue on nails I just started letting my nails grow longer then I would just nail polish them. One day at a meeting a girl slide over a bottle of nail polish to me I just slide it back over and said nothing. I guess her point was my longer nails.
Doing you own nails it can take some work to make sure you get all the nail polish off from around all the edges.

Good thread, Thank you

[CarlaWestin]

Although we're in a DADT situation, there are certain 'tells' that I don't conceal. As I haven't worked in 10 months, I've let my nails grow, shaped them and keep them polished in clear coat.
My hands look genuinely senior feminine. And I love it.
She's seen me bop into the kitchen for a late night snack wearing only Elila panties but, I've gotten no negativity about it.
And to think, I used to be so focused on every detail in the situational awareness experience before getting to this point.

[jacques]

- lingering perfume!

[Jane G]

Great thread, all so true. But does it matter.

I go to great lengths to put away my female appearance before my wife walks through the door. I know she appreciates that. I also know she has a very good idea of my life whilst she is out earning a crust for our table. It is what it is. Now and then my wife will walk in when I am fully dressed. I simply say good shift and go get changed. Me being around the house dressed is not for her, as much as I would like that. it is not our life. Me having a chunk of female tenancies she accepts. I choose so many of her clothes, as we have such similar taste there and in many other areas

[BrendaPDX]

Hi Charlotte,

So many good pointers here. Hear are some of my failings.
- Waterproof mascara and eyeliner. Who knew you had to use makeup remover not just soap and water!
- Press on nails that have popped off. OMG, the car, the park, the floor, my purse? I found them all; YES!
- Using her makeup and not putting it back just right.
- Not putting all of my makeup back, I left some on the bathroom counter.
- Lipstick on a coffee cup. I caught this one.
- Left my purse on the kitchen table. I caught this one too.
Here's to a very sympathetic DADT.

Thanks for the fun memories.

Brenda

[Helen_Highwater]

I can't remember who but someone posted recently about washing knickers etc out while showering. Well having washed a pair of lacy blue ones while drying off I placed them on the bathroom radiator, and then promptly forgot to take them with me. I noticed them when going to brush my teeth before bed and as far as I know they went unobserved by my SO. Oh it's so easily done!

[lucy_miller]

The first fail for me was when my wife took my overnight bag for a weekend away and found one of those little tubes of eyelash glue. I guess we?ve been semi DADT since. Over the years comments about dark colour under eyes, over plucked brow and shape of finger nails are most regular observations but I have found myself first point of blame for other family members leaving or using things and once a female watch was found on the sofa that I?m sure my wife still thinks was mine when it probably came from one of my daughters friends.

[Alexis00]

Leaving a pair of heels and a bra in the wardrobe.... that did it....

Did that lead to a talk with wife? That didn’t go so well for me after a few years.

[Devi SM]

This is an interesting thread but I suppose that you're talking about to not be caught for your wife, so it wouldst be easier to the wife?

I just say....

[CrossKimmy]

- lingering perfume!

Scents are a big time give away.

As I am still closeted I try to be as perfect as possible. Even if there?s a piece of pink string or something on the ground.

[Donna42]

It?s always stressful wondering if I put everything back in the drawers correctly

[WandaRae2009]

My wife found an eyelash one that I dropped. She just screamed and wanted me to call the exterminator for that bug with all the legs. LOL

[kellyanne]

- Pink towels
I had used them for years but when some friends came over, forgot to stash them

- Mascara - always good to clean it off before visiting :O(

- lingering girlie scents - often we can't smell because they are bound to receptors

- 2 sided make up mirrors - think my buddy is really wondering.

- Pink razors - Ironically , I use Daisy Fresh because all male razors chopped up my face and then went on to shave my body for 20 + years but
even a straight safety razor was no good vs my stubble, worst were BICs -

Not so many visitors these years with everyone married up and largely associate with other married people.

[JeanTG]

My experience with my wife has been that no matter how thorough I am at covering my tracks, even if I am 100% perfect in covering my tracks, she still knows when I've been dressing.

Wives can read us like a book. It's not just pink threads or lost eyelashes and earrings. It's mannerisms, moods, etc. Women are really, really intuitive. DADT? They can always T even if we don't.

Oh and the other thing I learned... don't EVER wear her stuff.

[Rachel Anne]

Press on nails
Dropped laundry
Wig Caps
Bobby pins
Hairs shed from wigs.

I always vacuum before someone comes over. Catches many of these things...

[Jenn A116]

So many good points here. For me its typically a missing press on nail. We never seem to notice they are gone until we've walked around the whole house, leaving a huge search area. ;)

[stefaniec]

There's too many to list (which I understand is probably not helpful) but it seems "digital" cover-ups are conspicuously missing here. Sure, clearing your browser history or using incognito mode is usually enough to prevent anyone from seeing what your online habits are on a shared device or if they happen to use your device.

But it wasn't until I was caught digitally that I realized I left so much more evidence than I originally thought. I will caveat I was caught via a very glaring misstep on my part (leaving pics in an extremely prominent, easy to find folder) but a gf or wife who is suspicious and determined can quite easily find a trail of crossdresser related website visits if you're not careful.

And proof that you've visited certain sites certainly has the potential to be a little more damning than makeup remnants.

[barbaralegs76]

When I was young, I use to remove makeup with soap. Until I use waterproof eyelasher from my mom.
I couldn't remove it even if I try. I didn't know about it, in the 80's, no internet, and no nothing to inform myself.
That day I went later with my mom to do some shopping, and one lady says: "Hey kid, you have awesome eyelashes!", and my mom says: "Yes, he has". She didn't say anything else, beause I still have long elelashes. I really hope she didn't get it. That was the last time I use soap, and I use makeup remover.

Today, I'm very careful to drop everything to the garbage, clean and vacum if there is any wig hair or something. I don't use any perfume or deodorant while I'm Barbara, in order to not leave marks on sexy clothes. It was terrible when I was storing an awesome pair of stilletos, because I was thinking: "What if I get sick and I need to go to the hospital, and while there, my wide finds my stilletos???". finally, I drop them to the garbage and I preffer to buy a new pair, and wig, pantyhoses (one or 1st skin, 2nd for a new color layer, and a 3rd one with net type, that looks amazing), when the moment arrives. Sometimes also I buy sexy costumes and colored contact lenses to make the perfect Barbara. anyway, I don't know how to makeup myself, I know it can be better, but I need to practice more.

Kisses!

[April Rose]

I haven't really had those problems for years, but these threads make me wonder how my mother could NOT have known all those years ago.

[AndieB]

What did me in a few years ago with my wife was not taking the time to properly wipe off this heavy red matte lipstick that I had on while she went to a concert. Some of it came off with a makeup wipe, but she knew right away and supposedly her gay friend did too. But they were both pretty drunk so perhaps he forgot. Don't think she did!

Anyways, I have a few others that could be dead giveaways to someone very observant to a CD.

-leftover glitter the makeup wipes somehow miss, especially around the eyes
-black eyeliner that is 'stuck' along the lash line that remains if you're not being careful
-clip-on earring indents (I always forget about this one)
-slivers of red nail polish remaining on certain fingers

[CharlotteCD]

I haven't really had those problems for years, but these threads make me wonder how my mother could NOT have known all those years ago.

My parents knew, 100%. They questioned me when I was 4-8 and a caught with my sister's knickers in my room. They always asked if I wore them or wanted to be a girl, which their anti-lgbt attitude meant that I always said no.

I was so stupid when I was young. It's absurd to think that my sister didn't know I was taking her clothes either.

If only I'd admitted it when I was 4 or 5, and said I wanted to be a girl. Maybe parental love would have overcome their social prejudice.

[Jade P]

Recently I misplaced a pair of my panties in my house. I cant find them anywhere. My wife knows I crossdress, but hates it. So I hope I find them before she or someone else finds them.

[CharlotteCD]

I've got a new one to add to the list. I chucked an old top in the household waste bin a few days back (no use even to the fabric collectors), and then when I put it out on the kerb the next day, the bin promptly got blown over in the wind. Fortunately I heard it - the bags tactically covering had come out of the bin when it fell, so this white and flowery top was on clear display.

Oops.

[kellyanne]

OUAT we had a corporate exercise where 10 of us had to bring in an object that represented some core quality of character. Then we had to write them down and submit them without a name- mine was Swiss Army pen knife signifying self reliance.

They were typed up and placed on aboard - they were all pretty common objects.

One Lady got every single one correct - matching each to the person.

The average was probably 4/10 for the rest of us.

Like your reply, she had specific mannerisms, moods and things she attached to the person and voila it al made sense to her - still find it amazing she did it.

Some of the people she had recently met.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I've had the opposite problems, like fake nails that I couldn't get off.

The worst one was when I had a makeover and the MA put false eyelashes on me. I liked them so much, I slept in them. The next morning I tries to pull them off, and they wouldn't come off. And my wife was due home in 3 hours. I panicked, but then I got lucky. I took a shower, and the glue softened in the hot water.

Another tough one is underdressing in panties. Every time I underdress, I throw a pair of clean tighty whities into the dirty laundry. I want to make sure that the weekly count comes out right.

When I need to throw anything out, whether it's clothes, price tags, shipping boxes and such, I try to throw them away in a public trash can, not my trash can.

I had set up a PO Box near work, and I had a secret checking account for paying for girl stuff. When my work location moved, I closed that PO Box and opened another closer to home. I filed a change of address with the bank, and they sent that notification to my home address. That was a triple whammy. My wife found both my PO Boxes and my secret bank account.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Many Many years ago I had a problem with wayward sequins,

We now have a very workable DA/DT with my:love:Wife,
She knows about every thing , But just don't want to see me while dressed, >Orchid**o:daydreaming:o**