Outside

[Jen.nd]

Why is it so hard to go out in the public eye dressed up!!! I tell myself for days that im going to do it, I get all dolled up and then critique myself to no end and say welp look like a dude in a skirt... I have gone out twice dressed and it was a rush and soooo fun so does anyone have any tips to get past this?!

Pic is of what I'm wearing today and trying to go out and about in. To dressy??

[Diane426]

We have all gone through what your going through. Baby steps are best. For me going out early on a weekday worked best. You just need to trust your inner fem feeling. You might want to dress down a little for mid day mall runs. Try nice pair of fem pants and a pretty top to build confidence.

[Cass42]

Been there,ask a couple friends to go out with you

[Stephanie47]

If you're looking for some confidence building let me say "You look terrific!" I see a fine looking woman and not "a dude in a dress." I think you're being over critical of yourself. I will not say "Just Do It!" If you have not yet gone for an evening drive I recommend that to start breaking in. That's what I did and still do when I have the opportunity. I always make sure my gas tank is full and all my lights are in working order so I do not get stopped by a cop. It does not make any difference if a cop acts professionally, it is still nerve wracking. I stay off the Interstate because I want to be on a city street if my car were to break down. The exits are usually too far apart on the Interstate and I would not want to be lit up in a stream of car headlights.

In the beginning I created reasons to get out of my car; grabbed a free newspaper from one of those type boxes, mail a letter, return library books to the night return slot. Gradually I took and still do take strolls in a quiet residential neighborhood in the early evening. I am tall (six foot). I am self conscious of my height. I like strolling in a gently falling rain so I can use an umbrella which would conceal my very masculine face and in part obscure some of my height. An umbrella can also be lowered when passing someone so he or she will not see my face.

Baby steps. Do what is within your comfort zone. My comfort zone does not include shopping en femme; six foot and 200 pounds! Ugh! I'll just take a stroll until the calling melts away.

[Joyce Swindell]

Encouraging friends or SO is always a help for the second opinions as we are our worst critic, as well as someone to go with you.
Be confidant in knowing that there isn't too many people who look that closely and 90% of them don't care. They might get a chuckle or something but then have their own agendas and won't spend a second to voice or do anything. On a very rare occasion you might get a look or comment but it's always in passing.

The picture you posted shows you and I would bet cash money this is where you are on that spectrum of being noticed as a "dude in a skirt"......not likely.

[Beverley Sims]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with your appearance, all you seem to lack is a little confidence.

Just get out there for 5 mins, then 10 mins. then....☺☺☺

[docrobbysherry]

Gong out with other girls helps me. I'm usually not the homeliest, most masculine, most social, or most outspoken!:straightface:

Nor, the most feminine looking, acting, or the prettiest!:heehee:

[kimdl93]

Its stage fright, I suppose. You certainly do not need to worry about how you look....but even with a healthy level of confidence in your appearance, some nervousness is natural. Best you can do is just accept the momentary nerves as part of the process...and just step out the door each time.

[Jen.nd]

Thank you for all the kind comments and for all the tips im going to work on it!!! I cant wait to get over this hump!

[kellyanne]

I am to self conscious about my height and square jaw.
Probably a group scenario is best for myself, if I had a femme stature, I would certainly have gone out more.

[Lana Mae]

Check the venue and dress as those present dress! Grocery store generally some form of pants and a nice top! For example! This is not to say skirts are not worn or dresses but usually Sunday or late afternoon when coming home from work! If you look scared people will notice! Go in like you would in male mode, like you own the place and have a right to be there! Because you do have a right to be there! First few times cause butterflies! The secret is to get them to fly in formation! Best wishes and be safe! Hugs Lana Mae

[AngelaYVR]

Initially, all we want is to be mistaken for women. After you’ve been going out for some time, it just switches to wanting to express yourself however you look and be accepted/tolerated for it. The catch is that you have to go out enough to develop that sense of detachment. If it makes you feel any better, we have all experienced that nervousness but really that is what makes it such a thrill in the beginning. Be friendly and confident, that’s what people will notice about you.

[Teresa]

Jen.Cd,
Apart from a few evening drives I'd never been out in public before I attended a dinner dance held at a hotel for my social group . So I guess I jumped in at the deep end wearing a full length ballgown and 4" heels , what amazed me was I didn't feel nervous at all , it just felt right . After driving the thirty miles walking across the car park did make my more nervous , I kept thinking what have I forgotten to do ? The night went well , even in high heels I found dancing wasn't a problem , I never really looked back after that .
I will accept dressing up to the nines for an evening out and dressing for everyday is totally different , when i moved to my new home town I'd made the decision to go full time , what to wear for doing everyday jobs , how much makeup , had I chosen the right wig ? After my first day of doing every concievable job and registering at my new doctors I was exhausted but BOY did it feel good !

To me the biggest hurdle to get over is try and stop thinking you're a guy , try and get into a mindset of how a woman would do things and not how you might have done it in male mode . OK you're voice might not register right and you feel your bigger hands or broader shoulders will give the game away but then consider people come in all shapes and sizes , there are masculine looking women and feminine looking men so you will fit into that mix at some point . The other point for most of us is don't go OTT if you wish to blend in , consider how many women you see wearing skirts or dresses and higher heels . That's why I find heeled wedges a great compromise for the summer and heeled ankle boots acceptable for the winter months . I've been fulltime three years and haven't had a single problem , YES you can do it , it's just a matter of believing in yourself and confidence .

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Jen :hugs:, You look 110% passible, Go for it, >Orchid**O:daydreaming:O**

[Teri Ray]

I wish there was a good suggestion for how to get over being nervous about getting out enfemme for the first time. There isn't. But you look great in your picture and I am sure if you get out you will find that the world is not focused on you. Others here will tell you that most people pay little or no attention to others (least not the ones who choose to blend) or they just dont care. I can relate that my experience is being out as Teri I never believed that I was passing, but neither was I dressed to stand out. I know others knew that I was a man in a dress but I didnt care and neither did the people passing by. I bet others will confirm that if you act confident then you have a great start. Just look for safe venues. If you wouldnt feel comfortable going some where as your drab self its likely it isnt safe to go dressed. I always felt that being out dressed was the most exciting and scary venture I have ever taken. Have fun and be safe.

[TheHiddenMe]

Not sure how many places there are to go in your part of North Dakota but my first regular times out were to a popular mall. I quickly found out NOBODY cared. I've been out over 200 times since in the last 4+ years, and still no one cares. I walked for and hour and a half yesterday with a GG friend in a popular park and no one said anything--and then we went to a restaurant without issues.

These days, just put on a mask and you are even more anonymous.

You look appropriately dressed to me. The only way to get comfortable going out dressed is to go out dressed.

So just do it.

[Rachelakld]

you look very fem, so it's not a looks issue
I started in the early hours, before most people were at the shops (early opening cafe etc), eventually early at the shopping mall.
One day I realized 2 things,
1) no one cared and
2) I didn't care

[Connie D50]

You look great my first time out I set up a make over (if you haven't had one you well love it) a town over. It gave me the confidences it go out had a wonderful time, that was 45 years ago. Been going out sense lol.

[Helen_Highwater]

Jen,

"Why is it so hard to go out in the public eye dressed up!!!" Why, because even relatively younge members have grown up being told that males dressed in female clothing was either perverted, or wrong, or just downright strange. It's only recently that society began to accepting initially Gays into the mainstream and latterly the Trans community as well.

Overcoming that thought, the notion that as soon as you step outside there will be a lynch mob waiting for you is hard to do. We've all wrestled with it. The thing is once you manage to take those first steps you quickly realise as others have said, no-one really notices us.

Once you overcome the initial nerves and start to relax and act more naturally, you will, if your avatar is anything to go by, merge into the crowd. Dress appropriately for the time and place and you'll be fine.

Have you done the drive though fast food thing yet? That short interaction with someone you'll never see again. Things like that are confidence boosters as is going to an ATM or pay at pump filling stations. Short duration that gets you started.

Shopping malls however are by far the safest and most enjoyable places to start. A crowd to hide in, most too busy wrapped up in what they're doing to notice you. Got for it.

[BrendaPDX]

Jen, You look beautiful, that is the only thing that stands out. As silly as it sounds Walmart isn't bad, just hold your head high and don't make eye contact. In general, in The Great Pacific Northwest women don't wear skirts or dresses when out and about; jeans, yoga pants, training shoes, and knit tops are about it. Half the fun for me is just getting out, I love the adrenaline rush, it hits me so hard I can't stop my hands from shaking and I love it. I know I am definitely a fringe person. You look great! The only thing that might get you noticed is that you look too good, at least for my area. Remember to have fun, that's what it's all about. Brenda

[Cheryl T]

The fear of the unknown keeps us contained at home.

First of all you look wonderful.
The question is ... where are you going and what are the other women there wearing? If it's the mall and all are in jeans and a blouse with flats, then yes you are overdressed and you will attract attention. If you are shopping at Nordstrom then you're fine as other women will be dressed similarly.
If your attire is not the norm for the venue then all eyes are on you. If you are dressed as all others then you are in the background.

People tend to stare at the outliers. Those that are too tall, too fat, too short, too skinny, over dressed, under dressed.
If you wish to wear that outfit then do so. It's perfect and you look wonderful.
Hold your head up, show confidence not fear and carry yourself in a manner that shows "I Belong Here" and ignore those around you. Don't be watching to see if they are watching.

My first time out I was the deer in the headlights. I would glance all around to see who was staring and that's when I realized no one was looking at me. They all had things to do, places to be and were concerned with what was happening in Their World. I wasn't part of that world so I was ignored. That's when I learned no one really cares.

Confidence. It's your best friend.

[Aunt Kelly]

Your look is terrific, Jen. A bit much for grocery shopping, but a meal at a nice restaurant? Perfect. If that's too much interaction, try the mall at lunchtime. You'll be just another office worker running an errand on her break.
Keep in mind that, as good as you look, you will eventually get clocked, so be ready to accept that with a confident smile. People will treat you according to how you present yourself. That's something to be enjoyed so don't fear it. Embrace it!

[rachelatshop]

Hi Jen
No we are our own worst critics, plus for all of our lives we have been told that what we are doing is wrong. So it is very hard to get past that. It takes many trips out to build confidence. Best of luck and happy dressing always and may the force be always with you.
Rach

[Michaela Jane]

I feel your pain, I have been out en femme, in a dress for a drive, never got out of the car. Recently, I went to an interstate rest area dressed in a skirt & blouse, wig etc with the intention of sitting at a picnic table. It was all going well until a guy drew up to park in the spot right next to me, despite there being 6 more spaces to my right. I bottled out then and drove off. It's all in my head I know, one day I will get out of the car in a dress or skirt. Until then, I make do with all femme clothes that let me pass as a guy in public.

[Sandi Beech]

The fear can be quite real. In the past I have actually had my hands shaking before. What is interesting is that I used that to my advantage a few times. One example, I was shopping in a Walgreens and I told the lady at the checkout I was nervous because I did not usually go out dressed this way. Her response was an understanding and comforting one. So even if someone spots you as a man in a dress, it is all fine. Personally I preferred going to places like a pharmacy over going to the grocery. Now I can do stuff I would not have imagined I could do in the past so it is possible to overcome the fear and make progress. It really is mostly in our heads but it does take some effort to move things forward.

Sandi

[Teresa]

Sandi,
That is the next hurdle , stop feeling you need to explain yourself , I would never tell anyone now , " I don't usually dress this way " . I will add that going to my builder's merchant did need a little more courage but after I was called madam a couple of times that problem faded away , I always felt sorry for women who tried to shop in builder's merchants , they were often ignored and treated like idiots .

[Sandi Beech]

Teresa,

I did not feel a need to explain myself, but I figured it would be better than having them think I was nervous because I was shoplifting or doing some other nefarious activity. I am quite a bit further along now, and have gone dressed into home improvement stores or wherever I want. Keep in mind I do not really dress to blend either. I just wear what I like on me. We all have various means to get beyond the fear factor. I am just saying that has worked for me, and there is hope for people gripped by those fears. If you know how shy I really am, it is surprising I have come so far. It can be quite liberating to get beyond the fear factor.

Sandi

[MiniRock]

I think Angela and Sandi have the right idea Jen: if you can keep a lid on the fear, you don't really have to be all that convincing. The first time I left the house was only in 2019, without even a wig. But I noticed that the better I felt about how I looked, in terms of clothing, makeup and wig, the easier it got. But at six feet without heels and a bit tarty, I have little chance of blending, let alone passing. But like everybody here says, you can move around in public dressed as a woman without much difficulty if you choose your locations. Personally, I find it quite easy to get a really early (and hence empty) Srassehbahn (tram) into the centre of town, where the boulevards are wider, most of the people are tourists rather than locals and it's easy to vary ones route to suit the conditions. When if it starts to get too busy for comfort, you can go home.

[Teresa]

Sandi,
I didn't mean DIY stores I meant trade stores where the tradesmen buy their materials .

[Karren H]

You look awesome and very appropriately dressed! I remember the fear the first time I went out but just grab the door handle and go for it. The next time will be easier and easier! Don't forget all the accessories that eny other woman would take with her.... and a fem face mask! If I can do it anyone can..... This is me out on a business trip in the rain... have to have a feminine umbrella!

[Sometimes Steffi]

There's two ways to do it.

I'll give you an analogy. I'm originally from Boston, where the water is typically cold, especially if the beach is not in the Gulf Stream. If you want to go into the water, there's two ways to do it.

1. Go to the edge of the water, and get your feet wet. Then walk in slowly until the water is up to your knees, and then up to your waist. The, dive in for a swim.

2. Stand about 50 feet from the water's edge. Take a running start and keep running full speed until tou're up to your waist and then dive in for a swim.

Both ways work, but I'm a type 2 kind of girl.

However, when I swam in Lake Yellowstone which is fed by snow melt and at at elevation of approximately 7,000 feet above sea level, I opted for method 1. At each stage, I waited until I couldn't feel my feet any longer.

[luuv2dress]

You've been out before just step out and go.
I get my urges and just get dressed and go, I went out today ended up getting busy in the store panty sale!!!!. I'm sure they noticed the giant lady but nobody said a word. I'm really starting to notice that no one cares and goes about their business.I use to get dressed then scare myself out of going out not so much these days.

- - - Updated - - -

yes dress for the time of day and where you my be heading, over dressed draws attention, blend in and nov=body notices


We have all gone through what your going through. Baby steps are best. For me going out early on a weekday worked best. You just need to trust your inner fem feeling. You might want to dress down a little for mid day mall runs. Try nice pair of fem pants and a pretty top to build confidence.

[Angela Marie]

When I first started dressing my makeup skills were very rudimentary so I would never venture out, perhaps only in my car for a short drive at night. After a few makeover I got better, but still never went out in public. On day I traveled about 100 miles from home for a makeover. The guy did an awesome job and I looked great. I stopped in a drugstore on the way home, but only for a few brief seconds. When I got home I was in the bathroom about to take the makeup off. I looked in the mirror and thought to myself; "i've driven over 200 mile today, I look great, so why am I not going out" I went back into my car and headed for the supermarket; not the one in my neighborhood. I wasn't that brave yet lol. When I arrived my stomach was churning. I got out and walked in. No problem whatsoever. A lot of smiles from women, and several from men. Since then, about 10 years ago, I have gone out continuously. I still take precautions but going out is a part of my life now. You have to be comfortable in your own skin. It takes time. No need to rush.

[Krisi]

"Too dressy"? Where are you going? I would lose the heels unless you're going to a high end shopping mall. Most women would wear flats. And of course, you need a purse.

[CrossKimmy]

I totally relate. But girl you are gorgeous!! Show the world who you are! It?s selfish keeping that beauty locked away!

[Star01]

I cannot wrap my head around the compulsion to go out in public. I am challenged to shop and have an indoor only wardrobe. My costume store wigs are only good enough for private photo sessions and I could never discretely store even the most basic of wardrobes. No complaints, that is my lot in life as far as my dressing goes. True, we make our own opportunities but the making part has bigger hurdles for some of us.

I have underdressed with ear studs, rings and some subtle makeup and got some femme items, makeup and panties. I?m in line next to a guy who looks like an NFL lineman and the clerk starts telling me how pretty my rings are. That was flattering in a way but also scary as this is a small town and the dollar store is within walking distance. A neighbor catches wind of something like that and it?s all over town.

My dream is to get a presentable wig and wardrobe, make friends who can serve as wing girls and get a room somewhere out of the area. The realities knock me back to earth. There are no support groups where I live and I avoid driving into the cities where that sort of thing exists. There is an urge to try it but I am a long ways and much expense from being able to do that.

[CynthiaD]

Try tricking yourself into doing it.

First, tell yourself you’re just going to step out of the door, and then run back in.
But when you get out, tell yourself, that maybe you’ll just walk over to the car before you run back in.
After you get to the car, tell yourself that you’ll just get in and sit for a while before you run back in.
Now after you’re sitting in the car, tell yourself hat it wouldn’t hurt to drive around the block once before you run back in.
When you get to the end of the block, “accidentally” turn the wrong way, and go for a longer drive that takes you past the mall.
Once you get to the mall, tell yourself that it wouldn’t hurt to drive around the parking lot a bit.
Then “accidentally” pull into a parking space, telling yourself it wouldn’t hurt to just sit there a while.
But then notice a stray tissue and a trash can right near the front of your favorite store.
When you get to the trashcan, tell yourself that since you’re at the front door of the store you might just take a peek inside, and then run back to your car.
Once you’re in the store, tell yourself that as long as you’re there anyway, you might take a peek at the dresses.
Once you get to the dresses, you’ve made it. Buy yourself something pretty.
And buy yourself a nice lunch at that cafe you’ve been meaning to try.

[jazmine]

Jen. You look amazing! I wish I cold look that good! So you ask any tips on how to get over the fear and just get out? Hmmm, outside of all the great comments and advice in this thread, I would say, I don 't have anything. For me it was the scariest thing I have ever done. One day I just got to the point, "I have to do this". I did, and it got easier over time. Now I go out in daylight, shopping or dining with only the tiny slightest of worry. In fact today, my wife and I stopped off for a drink at a pub, and our waiter came over and said, "what can I get you ladies". I didn't hear it but when I started yapping, he became EXTREMELY apologetic. My wife said, "don't worry, he gets that all the time". When he left I asked my wife what that was all about. She told me he mistaken me for female. Although I was tickled pink, I was dumbfounded. I wasn't anywhere trying to present female. I was in my sloppy guy form in a t-shirt and cargo pants with my converse and leather jacket with my baseball hat backwards. Was he going on my long hair and earrings? Lol......maybe because it's how I trim my eye brows. I don't know. Anyways, if I would have used my crappy attempt at a softer voice, he would probably never had a second thought. Go at your own pace. When you are ready, you will leave your comfort zone without "too" much second guessing and fear.

[Maid_Marion]

Hi Jen,

You look good! Entirely appropriate for going to an upscale mall or eating out at nice restaurant.

Marion

[OliviaB]

Hello all, today i went out alone for shopping in an hypermarket dressed as a woman. first time alone, my past experiences dressed as a woman were with my girlfriend on special occasions. i read a lot of your advices and considered to be dressed as not to be remnarked, but still in the way i like. Well going through the shop was just perfect, nobody noticed me, even i noticed a man that looked at me, but like a man looking a woman. my fear was to go to the cashier, well again it went perfect, the lady asked me : 'madam do you need the stamps' , and i was really happy coming back home, it made my week ned. worse think is to get rid of the fake nails...takes you 1 hour

[Lydianne]

@OliviaB:

This is very, very cool! 👍.

You should be shouting about this experience from the rooftops instead of trying to sneak it in incog! :lurk:. It didn't work anyway because I see you! 🧐 :wave2: . . .


. . . and now everyone else will! :tongueout.


This would have been worthy of its own thread - even if it weren't your first post ( welcome to the community, btw!! :gh: ), because it wouldn't take much searching to find out that going out is one of the aspects that gets the most support requests here.


So seeing another success report like yours is always appreciated because it helps others! 📈.


Congratulations! 🍾 🥳.

- L.





- - - Updated - - -

( I was hoping I had left enough time between them so that it wouldn't concatenate. Oh, well! :sigh: )


@Star01:


I cannot wrap my head around the compulsion to go out in public. I am challenged to shop and have an indoor only wardrobe.

For some, it's not a head thing. For me, it was more of a soul thing.


I dressed indoors and was happy to do so until the end of time, . . . until it started to hurt that nobody could see how I felt internally ( that was actually far down the line of an escalation ):


- First, I became unhappy about my male body shape, and that led to me starting to use hip padding.

- Then I became extremely unhappy about my face, and that began a long, desperate and almost self-destructive makeup journey.

- Then I became unhappy that nobody could see how I felt about myself.


That feeling kept growing until I couldn't hold it back any longer. "Progression", they call it.


On the day I stepped outside for the first time, I was fully prepared to become the laughing stock of the neighbourhood :haha: :straightface:.

- L.

[ellbee]

I get all dolled up and then critique myself to no end and say welp look like a dude in a skirt...

Then don't wear a skirt (and heels)? :D


I suppose it depends on where you live, and where & when you go. But personally? I *rarely* see a GG in a skirt & heels. But black leggings abound, to be sure -- or at least until shorts-weather arrives.

Maybe the skirt is making you feel way more self-conscious than perhaps you should? :strugglin


Look around whenever you're out & about (as a guy). Make a mental note of what the GG's are wearing, particularly in your age group. Also make note of the time of day, the day of week, the location, the season & weather, etc. This will give you a better feel of what perhaps *you* might feel more comfortable wearing when planning your next outing.

This would help you to "blend"... Which means there will be less eyes on you... Which means you'll be that much less jittery.

Because if a GG were to wear what you're wearing? Yes, she would get a lot of attention. And as such, so would you. ;)



Anyway, as others previously alluded to...

Take a word from Nike: "Just Do It"

Only way you're gonna be able to get over that hump.


BTW, you look great! :battingeyelashes:

[kimdl93]

Ellbee and others are right - you will feel a bit less conspicuous if you’re dressed similarly to other women...age and situation appropriate as they say. At the same time, its entirely ok to wear a skirt and cute top like the one you’re pictured in. Just choose a venue where its suitable, even if you’re dressed a bit more smartly than some other women. I’m thinking a that outfit would look great for a nice restaurant, a wine bar, nice coffee shop, museum, live theatre or even a better quality women’s clothing store.

[Kimberly A.]

Hi Jen. :) I know it's been a few days since you've posted this and you've gotten a lot of replies since then, but I'll still put in my 2 cents. LOL

Anyway, I honestly don't see what's ailing you here..... You look like a cute girl to me and way more passable than me as well. I see you've gone out dressed twice so far before you posted this pic? Well, if you could do it twice before, what's stopping you from doing it now? I go out dressed quite often, any time I get the chance and I know I'm not the most passable CD'er out there and some people have probably figured that I'm a dude in a dress or a skirt..... But I don't care what other people think, I am very comfortable going out en femme. Like you said, it's such a rush and soooo much fun! LOL So just put on your big girl panties and go for it! :bs:

[Lori Ann Westlake]

You're looking good, Jen. Go do it, if that's what you want the most. I've done it a few times myself, although I'm really "in the closet."

[Jen.nd]

Again thank you everyone for the kind word! Planning on dressing down a bit and going to a bigger town tomorrow. Just have to remember what u all say that people are usually consumed with there own day to day life not me!

[Natalie5004]

And they do not care. It is all in your head. If you want to do it......

[Sallee]

Congrats, Jen on your trip tomorrow. Hopefully it will go well and be relatively boring because nobody cares or notices. Maybe just some dirty old men who think you're just another hot chick
I have gone out many times over the years. I don't dress often but when I do the first step out requires a deep breathe and a here goes The first step is hard and the next few minutes are a confidence builder because I am not being noticed or at least not being stared at. I do dress down, slacks, flats, minimal makeup but good beard cover. One thing for sure it is always fun and a great buzz. After a bit of time it kind of becomes normal and no one real notices. NOw that doesn't say they aren't snickering behind my back but I don't know that and I had a great time.
So get out there and show the gurl off.

[kimdl93]

Have fun, Jen! You will soon forget your fears.

[michellecd9999]

You look great and totally passable! Go out and enjoy the RUSH! I do!

[Devi SM]

Dear Jen,

Long ago I learn that fear is the child of ignorance.

I explain myself because many people get the word ignorance as an insult.

We all ignore what the future will bring. We can do plans, dream or fear about the future but we don't know what will happen. We can predict the daily future will repeat as it has been happening but to change any important element in the scenario creates a bigger uncertainty and for many is a cause of fear and all the feelings you can imagine.

To go out dressed as a woman change completely our scenario and our instinct of survival makes fear it but those are just instincts. We can carefully plan, as thieves planning an assault to a bank all the possibilities, that will give us some "knowledge" in the future.

Applying the last, you have yo thing when and where you will go dressed. That attire yours is ok if you go to the office on a weekday, or your a business woman, what in the area I live I'd not common and you would call the attention. That's a very important point. In the first outs you don't want to call the attention but just fit in the multitude to "learn" what happen, so stop being ignorant of what's going on when you are like a woman. May be just some jeans and a normal blouse or tee would be better but remember that's my appreciation of your enviroment..

Go out as a male in a day like when you plan to go in femme, to the place where and see what women oof your age dress.

Finally just going out will teach you, believe me, that nothing will happen. Today so many people know something about transpeople but just try to blen with them.

Knowledge will kill the ignorance and she will have no kids.

Mho.

Devi

[Leslie Mary S]

In your photo, I see a strikingly good looking woman dressed for a job in a office where big money is in action.
It is not the "Stay at home mom with kids" or "I am off duty from my office" look.
Now many women wear blue jeans, or leggings, and a pull over causal top.
For this look, look around and see what other women are wearing.
When I dress to go out, I too, tend to like to dress up too.
I am not into the "everyday" look. I know I can not pass so I don't even try.
Yesterday I too looked around and saw only one woman wearing a top and skirt. Also all were wearing sneakers, deck shoes, or sandals. and minimal makeup. The days of "Dressing to the nines" for shopping are long gone down here in my area (Urban South-East USA).
But I still love your look.

[NaughtyMichelle]

First of all, you look great. But remember, it's more than looks. Acting like a woman is important too. I mean how you walk, how you sit, mannerisms, etc.

I've seen some very attractive crossdresssers give it all away by not paying attention to details.

[AndieB]

I'm right there with you! I haven't been out in public yet and have only driven around to and from makeovers. But that is going to change very soon. Just being on this forum has given me the confidence to make the next step, so I would definitely listen to the great people here as they know their stuff through experience. And whatever you do, don't feel like you're alone because there's probably hundreds or thousands of people trying to take that step as well. :hugs: