Does the image of your fem self in your mirror match the one in your mind?

[docrobbysherry]

Mine does. But, I'm kind of an odd duck. Not even thinking about dressing until was in my 50's I missed out on presenting as a young woman!:sad:

Folks wonder why I wear body prosthesis and masks? It's so I can see a pretty, young, woman in my mirror!:daydreaming:

Do u see the woman u dream of becoming in your mirror? If not, why not? If so, how did u manage it?:straightface:

[Bobbysue]

No. In my mind I'm stone fox. In the mirror I'm not. But from waist down in a mini skirt,hose and heels I like it.

[Helen_Highwater]

Facially I know I present in such a way as it's very possible some who know me could pass me by in a crowd. Would I like to look even more female then that has to be a yes but I've got to go with that mother nature gave me.

I'm fairly confident in my ability to dress such that face aside, an observer may well not even give it any consideration as to me being male. So in that respect yes I meet my expectations of the mental image I have of me.

I've accepted that I'll never look like a young female version of myself so I'll settle for looking like the more mature lady version.

[Kris Burton]

In my mind, I am no older than 40, with a largely unlined face and fit body. That goes for my male mode too, ego and vanity taking charge. In reality, I am pushing 70 and am pretty weathered to say the least. The mirror, or a picture tells the real story. I am aware but its fun to let the imagination run wild.

Interestingly, I recently dressed up,took a few pics and faceapped them. Without even trying, it was like I had the facelift of the century. It was like I knocked off 25 years.THAT matched my expectations, but it was a little unnerving at the same time. But I'm going to do it again!

[SaraLin]

in short: The mirror is NOT a friend of mine.

[alwayshave]

Not a chance. Though I have to admit I look like my sister when dressed, which is not what I'm shooting for.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Interesting, for the longest time I NEVER could get a firm MENTAL grip on what I actually looked like as a woman----Until the digital photo age and improvements in my makeup skills. NOW My images (Physical and mental) more or less match up.--I can at least get a fair grip on what I am "supposed" to look like as a woman, and compose my photo angles to look that way, concealing my less than perfect "manly" aspects.------It seems I can only "see" "bits and pieces" of my self in a mirror---never getting the full effect.---HOWEVER with a good PHOTO I can see the entire, overall effect and it "sticks" in my mind.--Thus becoming my "self-image" .

[Pumped]

Every so often I surprise myself and the image in the mirror meets my expectations and I see a sexy woman, but then, every so often the truth comes charging in. I regain some humility and that 60 year old guy in a dress is looking back at me!

[Brenda Freeman]

It took a make over with someone who knows about make up for tgirls and the right wig to love how I looked in the mirror. I was 50 that year, waited way to long. It changed how i felt about myself the part I hid for so long.

[Sandi Beech]

Doc,

Well I definitely have a mismatch between where I am vs where I want to be. I have to say when I first fully dressed up at the age of 30, I was pretty darned good looking, but got stressed out about it and purged for a long time.

I do the best I can do with what I have to work with, and it seems good enough for the people I meet. The main things I would like to do is loose some weight and get an eyelid lift to improve my looks. Granted, I use a lot more makeup than I should, but I like to transform as much as I can.

I am quite lucky to have youthful looking shapely legs. Mine are much more feminine than most guys, and at least I have one good asset to show off.

Sandi

[Raychel]

Yes it does, Doesn't make any sense, but it does.
Full fem from the neck down and just me from the neck up
My mind is confused, just like my appearance :heehee:

[NancySue]

Over the years, generally yes. As with life, I?ve had great days, good days and what! days. Recently, I?ve toned down a little on the advice of my former model wife, coupled with todays mode of women seemingly wearing less, if any makeup. A must to blend in. I remember the old adage ?beauty is in the eye of the beholder?.

[Krisi]

Yes, what I see in the mirror is pretty close to what is in my mind.

While I would like to see (and be) a twenty something "hot chick", I have more realistic expectations than that.

[crobeson96]

I look at my wife's face and see the pretty young thing I married and have loved for forty years. Yes, there are wrinkles there but most of them are because of me. Nothing to stop me wanting to kiss her every single time. She has taught me the meaning of female beauty, the truth about it.

All of my crossdressing life, every time I put on enough makeup to say that's what I was doing, I thought I look like my sister. The mirror says female but I could hardly be attracted to my sister, could I? More recently with FaceApp, I think I look like my memories of my mother when she was younger than I am now. Again, pretty but hardly erotic to me.

When I dress it is the weirdest combination of relaxation, satisfaction and excitement. But the woman in the mirror is more of a close friend.

I submit respectfully for your sisterly analysis! How I appreciate this forum.

-Camilla

[Stephanie47]

It does not matter if I am dressed in male mode or female mode the reflection in the mirror is way off reality. I figured that out when I looked at the images of pictures of myself in male mode. The images are definitely different than what I see in the mirror. I learned a long time ago to avoid mirrors when I am en femme. There are three mirrors in our home; two above bathroom sinks and one full length mirror in one bathroom. I am an in-home dresser so I forego makeup when at home. There is no necessity for it since I avoid mirrors. Nobody is going to see me, so why bother with makeup. At 74 I look like a grandpa or a grandma. I have no illusions about that fact. Frankly, I am more concerned with the neck down than the neck up.

[Territx]

Sometimes - it does and then other times - not so much! I can get some great looks at times when everything comes together. The other times, I just wish the hair, outfit, or makeup had looked like what I wanted . . . or that I had left the chips, etc. on the plate!

[kellyanne]

Pretty well, have the same look forever.

Every time I tried a different wig hair color or a longer style - past the shoulders - then I feel a strong feeling of mismatch.
I have a red head, platinum blonde etc but they just don't jive with the skin tones and it does not look or feel right.

Wearing whites / beige tones on top also dampen a sense of self here - I need color next to my face to pop my eyes.

[CharlotteCD]

Now that my makeup skills have become consistent, I recognise Charlotte in the same way I recognise my male presented self.

I used to think "Wow, is that really me?", and now it's just "it's good to see you again Charlotte"

Do I look like how I want to? Of course not. I'd look like Rachel Brosnahan if I did. I don't have stupid fantasies of looking like a GG any more. I just play the cards I've been dealt.

[Jessica Secret]

For me yes it does, in fact it exceeds it! I think I look gorgeous in beautiful/romantic lingerie, and it's a very rewarding feeling to see myself and look/feel beautiful.

[Bobbi46]

I don't trust mirrors, they always break !!!! lol

[DianeT]

One thing I know for sure is that even in full nines I am incapable of telling whether the creature in the mirror or the picture looks more like a female or a male. I could tell for every other dresser, but not for me. I recognize myself too much, and know I'm male. So the mirrors and pictures scream "male, with female cues". This said, I am not aiming at looking like any particular woman, I just want to see a feminine version of me, so whatever result I get is interesting, and therefore satisfying to some degree.

[Geena75]

I am on the fringe here. I don't see (recognize) my regular self in the mirror. In some ways, I look better than I was imagining. I know that may change when I clear off my face for a full female look, but time will tell.

[MarinaTwelve200]

DianeT--That's why I depend on Photos to judge what I look like----Something about the immediate "feedback" from a mirror prevents many of us from seeing the entire image.---perhaps we focus on various parts and not the whole or perhaps the 3-D aspect throws us off----Photos, on the other hand, let us see the entire "picture". I have also noticed it works best to film VIDEOS instead of snapshots. Snapshots might encourage us to pose "stiffly" or "Unnaturally. Take the VIDEO and use frame captures over interesting areas for more natural "Stills".

[sometimes_miss]

Well, there's no way I would ever look anything like a female in the mirror, so I just don't look in mirrors when I'm wearing girl clothes. No sense spoiling the illusion.

[Maid_Marion]

I have really great figure for wearing women's clothes. :)

Marion

[kimdl93]

I look very much as I expect to look :(. Perhaps a little better at a considerable distance from the camera, like deep in center field, like Marla Hooch in A League of Their Own

[Teri Ray]

I always think I can look better than I actually do when dressed. My make up skills demonstrate that I do better one day than the next. All I really do is try to look my best.

[XemmaX]

sometimes i look in the mirror and think 'wow grrllll you look amazing' and sometimes 'you look like a donkey with make up on'...

[JustJennifer]

Yes, more or less. When the makeup's right and light is flattering.

I took a long, long, long break from dressing up -- 30 years -- and part of what got me back into this was simply wondering what that cute girl I saw in the mirror all those years ago looked like now. Had she aged well, or had the years taken a horrible toll on her? I needed to know.

Have you ever run into an old friend you haven't seen in years? At first you're taken aback at how the years have changed them, but in a few moments all that melts away, then and now merge into a complete picture, and you're with your friend again. That's what I experienced when I looked into the mirror after the long break. She's still me, and I am still her, both of us starting to show our age but still hanging in there.

[Cheryl T]

At times the reflection matches my inner woman. At times it doesn't.
I'm sure that's true drab or fab for most.

Sure I'd love to be a little shorter, a little thinner, a lot younger and so on, but I've accepted myself. I know I'll never be that model in the magazine and that's fine, so long as I can be the me I know I am.

[DianeT]

@MarinaTwelve200 Honestly I like myself better in the mirror than in pictures. Pictures (as far as I am concerned) are a harsher judge than the mirror, and I like them for that very reason. Looking at a video I get a feeling closer to what I experienced in front of the mirror (which makes sense since both are "live"). Very seldom, a photo may give a better look than the mirror, because I catched a favorable and more forgiving angle. In some of these particular shots, I can see a more feminine creature. But it so resembles me that calling it a woman is still a long shot away.
Agree that videos are more natural, without question. And they give justice to the wig, the hair movement and flow that I find very nice is totally lost in pictures.

[Alice Torn]

When i have been all done up wig to heels , i like teh image of the very tall senior long legged lady in the mirror. The kid of lady i wished i had in my life , but never had the chance to meet and date.

[Karren H]

No. My mind has created an image that would be impossible for me to attain with out a lot of surgery. Sigh.

[docrobbysherry]

It does not matter if I am dressed in male mode or female mode the reflection in the mirror is way off reality. I figured that out when I looked at the images of pictures of myself in male mode. The images are definitely different than what I see in the mirror. I learned a long time ago to avoid mirrors when I am en femme. There are three mirrors in our home; two above bathroom sinks and one full length mirror in one bathroom. I am an in-home dresser so I forego makeup when at home. There is no necessity for it since I avoid mirrors. Nobody is going to see me, so why bother with makeup. At 74 I look like a grandpa or a grandma. I have no illusions about that fact. Frankly, I am more concerned with the neck down than the neck up.
Thanks for your honest response, Steph. But, I refuse to force Sherry to live in my 78 year old, "real world"!:sad:
Like u, using prosthesis and pads, I can present a young woman's figure. But, unlike u I refuse to look at an old man's face on that sexy body!:devil:


Now that my makeup skills have become consistent, I recognise Charlotte in the same way I recognise my male presented self.

I used to think "Wow, is that really me?", and now it's just "it's good to see you again Charlotte"

Do I look like how I want to? Of course not. I'd look like Rachel Brosnahan if I did. I don't have stupid fantasies of looking like a GG any more. I just play the cards I've been dealt.
Well, the whole point of my post was to see who's in touch with their fantasy female, Charlotte. If I wanted to see Rachel Brosnahan, (whoever she is) in my mirror? I WOULD!:daydreaming:


One thing I know for sure is that even in full nines I am incapable of telling whether the creature in the mirror or the picture looks more like a female or a male. I could tell for every other dresser, but not for me. I recognize myself too much, and know I'm male. So the mirrors and pictures scream "male, with female cues". This said, I am not aiming at looking like any particular woman, I just want to see a feminine version of me, so whatever result I get is interesting, and therefore satisfying to some degree.One of the first things I had to do when I began dressed 25 years ago was remove ANY and EVERY vestige of the male me from my mirror. Because it turned, (turns), me off!:thumbsdn:
After all these years it's become automatic to present a completely female figure. No matter what outfit I'm wearing! The cherry on top is when I turn the old man's face on that figure into that of a 20's/30's woman!:devil:


I look very much as I expect to look :(. Perhaps a little better at a considerable distance from the camera, like deep in center field, like Marla Hooch in A League of Their Own Well, I had hoped to discuss our fantasy women. And, leave reality, passing, what we expect to see, etc. behind, Kim. But, I realize many here r stuck in their private real worlds. And, especially with Halloween coming up? That makes me very sad!:cry:

[Sandi Beech]

Doc,
I was just thinking about when I first joined a couple of years ago, and I recall being puzzled by your comments regarding the wearing of masks. So you kind of fooled me for a while until I figured out what you were talking about, since I had never seen such masks before.

As one who ventures out into similar venues as you, I totally understand the thrill of feeling like you are one of the younger crowd. That is only possible with acceptance, and we have certainly had some fun outings - of course I am not a world traveler like you, but I do get around.

I will be on the road for Halloween myself so I am trying to figure out what to wear now, woo hoo. I hope you have a great Halloween outing too.

Sandi

[Charlotte Haynes]

Sort of. My male mode definitely does not, though. I genuinely appear to have brown hair when I look in the mirror but any photo of me or CCTV camera disagrees.

[Veronica Lacey]

My physical mirror image while dressed en femme is certainly not congruent with what I imagine that part of my inner female self to be.

This goes hand-in-hand with how I actually feel while wearing the clothing. I wear forms and heels when dressing to enjoy a closer-to-true female form and experience but because I don't expect to look like a woman there is no disappointment. However, the clothing's fabrics, colours and fit do mirror how I feel inside. That really is the mirror I observe in my mind. :)

[Linda K.]

I'm not even close! However, I am working on it! :daydreaming:

[Maryannnite71]

Not as much as I?d like , but still love seeing what looking back

[Kitty Sue]

Nope, the woman in my mind does not match the one in the mirror. However, I am okay with that these days.

[SarahLynn]

Many, many years ago when I was in New York City, I had a lady friend who one day made me up to look like a woman. She did this while I was sleeping, taking a nap on her couch. She, with her sisters help, did a full face makeover then fit me with a wig. I woke and as usual needed to attend to some business in the facility. I walked in did what needed doing and then as I was washing my hands looked into the mirror. WOW Where did that lady come from. Yes, I knew it was me but suffering cat whiskers she was one hot chick. She wasn't just hot she had that quality that said class. Even though the shirt was male, from the neck up was all female. They had a plan to have me attend a lingerie party one of the other sisters was going to have. If I had gone to that party someone most certainly would have gotten my attention and I'd have been outed in a NY Second. You can guess how if you were to see the lingerie they were modeling.

Now when I dress to the nines or even dress down I look for that woman. The closest I've come to her was during the time when I had my own long hair and could dress in a style that was common for the ladies of my youth, suits, knee and ankle length skirts, heels, solid colour blouse, etc.. Today that lady is long gone and I know it. She will never again visit the home of Sarah Lynn. But she will remain in my mind and Sarah Lynn will have the pleasure of searching for her in the carousel of time.

[Chloe from Colorado]

When my wife does my make up, yes, when I do it, not so much!

[Jane G]

Great thread. Not sure I have a female image in my mind as such. I see myself in the mirror and relate to the image as me. In photos I see the two sides. A few I think I look feminine, others I see my male side. The beauty of that is I can delete those I don't like. Much as my wife does and though our thought process is no doubt slightly different in choosing which, I suspect it is broadly similar.