Shopping...!

[Stacy_CD]

Hi everybody.

Well, as I'm just starting with crossdressing (well, technically, I started when I was like 12, but...), I need to build a wardrobe in a big way. Aside from being a bit of a poor student, I'm having trouble mustering up the balls to just walk into a department store and pick some nice items up for myself. I had a few things from a store catered to CDs, but those things are gone, and now problem 1 is getting out there.

I was just hoping somebody here would be able to give me some good advice, or a kick-in-the-ass to get me going!

-Stacy

[PTPJen]

Hi Stacy, Welcome to the fourm.

You don't say where you live, but if you go to almost any major city you buying stuff isn't a big deal. Most people I approch in a regular shop wnat to sell me a product and not interested in the dressing part of shutting you down. In the past 20 years I have only had one experiance by phone where someone told me they didn't sell to men becayuse of the wig size.

What I found is to come up with a list of things you need, places to go and call a few days in adavance and tell them you are a crossdresser and will they help you there, I'm sure most will say yes, I usually stay away from Male salespeople, but most women sales people are very good about it, just be up front about it. If you would love to chat just E-mail me back.

[Lawren]

Put on your best poker face and go in and buy what you want. I have been doing that for a long time and no one has ever openly done anything derogatory toward me. The worst that has happened to me was a few stares. It does take a bit of courage but the only way to conquer your fears is to face them down. Sometimes it helps me to buy something masculine and/or unisex also so that I appear to be shopping for myself and some one else too. Sometimes when I get to checkout I will make some kind of remark like, "The things I do for her", or, "Do you think this will look good on me?", to the cashier just to throw them off guard a bit. It usually draws a smile out of them and breaks the tension and disarms them. There are many different things you can say to some one without actually lying or giving yourself away. Be creative and most of all be relaxed.

Happy shopping!

[Yes I am]

Never go shopping alone, you need someone to tell you if what you're buying really looks good on you or not. Also, the fear factor is almost non-existent when you bring a friend along with you.

[Sage GG]

Stacy
if money is a bit of a problem did you ever think of thrift stores? there is a place near where we live that I was able to get a pale green skirt suit for three bucks ,a belt for 50 cents, even a leather(?) jumper for another three bucks. Look around before you hit an expensive dept store.

Do you ever stop at tag sales?

[Wendy me]

just go out and do it no one realy cares what you buy and the more you do it it getts easyer and easyer....

[michelle19845]

stacey,
some of the best ways are to go to a walmart or meijer that has a self checkout system.all you exchange in conversation is thanks,have a nice day.rather than a cashier scanning your items.
secondly,i say a thrift store like a good will or salvation army or resale shop.there tends to be older women that run them and they aren't as involved in what you buy.
you can always try online shopping too as long as you're the only one recieving the mail.
hope it's of some help.

michelle19845

[JeanneF]

For saving money, check if there's a Plato's Closet in your area. It's a used clothing store chain that markets to the teen/early 20s marketplace. Lots of really cute stuff from Abercrombie, American Eagle, Express, Gap and other mall-type stores. Good shoe selection too.

The only downside is that the staff there is usually girls in their early 20s, but a little flirting and joking with them while paying breaks any tension that there could be. I've actually gone out on a few dates recently with a girl from one of the stores at the mall that I shop at...we got chatting about dressing, and she asked me if I wanted to get coffee with her when she got off work. :happy:

[GypsyKaren]

Goodwill is the place to go, that's where I get most of my things at. I find lots of cute stuff, and you can't beat the prices. Don't worry about what others think, they could care less, and it's your life to live as you see fit, not theirs.

Karen

[michellecd9999]

Go into a thrift store or consignment store. Tell them you have to do a skit or even a cross-dress party, just make an excuse, act like you don't like it. They will help you and probably enjoy it! You won't spend a lot of money and will come away with at least one outfit per store!
Michelle

[Stacy_CD]

Thanks everybody!

I know it's all mental. If I walk in with confidence, everybody else's opinions will just bounce off me. I'm trying to convince myself I don't care what these random strangers will think, and I think that in my mind, but in my heart I guess it still scares me.

I just wanted to mention I'm from Toronto, so if anybody has any Toronto-specific suggestions, that'd be just great as well. Think i'll hit up some thrift stores soon.

[Karren H]

Yeah, shop at Kohl's at their clearence's and you can try your fem clothing on in the mens dressing rooms. And don't forget to ask for a gift reciept. Makes it look like your buying for your girlfriend. And Walmart with the self checkouts, is a great place to buy lingerie if your embarased to take bras and panties through a regular checkout!!! And above all else, have fun!!!

Love Karren

[Joy Carter]

I was totaly spazed out the first time (never bought any bras though) but it got easyier the more I did it. Asking for gift boxes and gift receipts are good ploys to use. Have fun and look good doing it.

[EricaCD]

Honey, honey, honey....

There is a beautiful thing called the Internet. You never interface with a single living soul. Hundreds of stores will cheerfully ship to you, and you are talking about a few bucks a package - hardly enough to deter even a semi-broke girl.

I never shop in person for clothes (only cosmetics). That has not stopped me from going absolutely hogwild on buying. Enjoy!

Erica

[carol ann]

I don't advise stores that cater primarily for crossdressers - they are inevitably more expensive that department stores.

I have for many years gone into larger stores and shopped around and now do it without the slightes quarm. If someone makes a comment or asks who a particular item of clothing is for then I either ignore the question and ask one in return or i might say I want a present for my wife/sister etc but it never comes to that.

i have even bought breast forms and bra enhancers. When i wanted a wig I did say it was for me for a fancy dress party not having the courage to say i would wear it most weeks at some time. Harder to find shoe shops that sell larger size shoes but whereI have I have never been questioned. Most sales staff are traine d to be sensitive to buyers needs.

[michelleD]

Over the past few years I have had Good experiences at locally own busniesses specializing in lingerie. The women working at the shops are very helpful, know I'm looking for sales, finding and assisting with the proper fit, especially with shapewear, inserts(padding) and wigs. The privately owned shops appricate the business and have told me there are a few other gents,who come in to make personal purchases. A few items such as nylons and thongs I buy at department stores sales. Thrift store are great for the rest of the wardrobe. enjoy shopping its one of the best sensations of dressing as a lady.

[Caitlintgsd]

I've never had any problems at mainstream stores. The only time I shop at the tg specialty stores is when I'm looking for shoes. I did pick up a cute leather skirt at Glamour Boutique in Las Vegas last week though. The only time I've ever been questioned was at a Lane Bryant. The salesperson asked if it was a gift for someone else. I didn't eleborate.

[wendy]

here are some things I've done when I first started buying items to 'get over' my fear :

- try to go to a store that has no 'attendant' in the clothing department. That way you don't feel pressured to make a quick judgement or feel that someone maybe watching you.
- try and go when the store first opens, and try to go on a weekday. Most of the time you wind up having alot of time to browse around looking thru the racks before the first customer even steps foot into that department.
- if you can, thrift stores. I find most people there are engrossed in finding that perfect item and couldn't careless what you are doing.

After a while, you'll find that no one really bats an eye with you browsing thru lingerie/women's clothing. In today's society, I find alot of women buying men's stuff and vice versa.