How good was it

[Sabine Janus]

So I'm curious- For those who disclosed to their SO after marriage and had the marriage dissolve how good was the marriage BEFORE you disclosed or were found out.

1) Good
2) OK
3) Bad

And then was crossdressing the deal breaker?

I have the theory that a good marriage would endure, but in a weaker marriage, there is no reason to tough it out.

[Raychel]

I told my wife after many years of marriage,
The crossdressing really was on the back burner.
We had a very rough marriage, We fought almost all the time.
Only small sections that were ok.
So the marriage was definitely bad. (Learned al lot from that)

The crossdressing was not a deal breaker.
I have been working on divorce for 4 years now, she is still fighting against.

So the dressing had nothing to do with it.

[kimdl93]

Well, I was married for 16 years to my second wife. She knew I enjoyed wearing panties and pantyhose even before we became engaged, but at the time it was pretty clear she did not want to see me fully dressed. Over the last decade of our marriage I slowly but consistently pushed the envelope, thinking that like a frog in a pot, she would grow accustomed. I was quite wrong. When the crossdressing water got too warm for her comfort she jumped away from what she described as a mostly good marriage.

Over duration of the marriage, we seldom disagreed and when we did it was civil and respectful. There really was no other causal factor.

[Debbie Denier]

My wife found my clothing about 10 years ago. Insisted I purged immediately which I did. She doesn?t want to know. She said she felt ashamed and had no one else to confide in. I then came out to my mother.I had a wardrobe at her home for 10 years until she passed away last year, Purged all the contents since and have few opportunities now. Still with wife get on with her ok but relationship not the same as it was.Gone from good to ok.

[Bianca Fay]

My marriage was classified in the "okay" category. Unfortunately, we were both quite young and we rushed into marriage without knowing each other very well.

We had only been married for about 6 months the first time she caught me wearing a pair of her pantyhose. She was rightfully shocked and made it very clear that I was never to do it again.

Well, like an idiot, I continued wearing her nylons and would do so in situations where I was bound to be caught. And I was. Numerous times. Our marriage lasted for a couple more years but she finally had enough. After catching me again for the umpteenth time, I was directed to the living room couch to sleep (as usual whenever I was discovered) but the following morning she wanted me to move out.

So that was the end. On a positive note she gave me the pair of pantyhose I had been wearing the previous evening! Her gesture wasn't intended to be kind, the pantyhose were thrown at me in a manner meant to be ridiculing. Regardless, I took them with me.

Years later I was able to apologize for my actions and we reconnected on a friendship level before she finally moved to a different city. Ironically enough, prior to moving she became an ally in my 'hobby' which included shopping for hosiery.

[SaraLin]

My first marriage got ruined my me. My crossdressing wasn't really a factor in it. It was OK - but I wanted to get out into the world and live. She didn't.
So I did and she didn't. The end.

My second marriage was a major mistake. It was lust-based to a woman who warned me that she never lasted more than three years with a man.
When she started cheating and running around, she blamed it on my dressing, but I found out that one of the men she was sleeping with was also CD, so we both know better.

My third (and hopefully last) marriage is "pretty good", but she knew up front about me.
I'd label it "wonderful" except that she is less than supportive of my feminine side. To this day, after 20+ years of marriage, she still doesn't want to see me in anything more than my nighties. It gets difficult at times, but I love her and am willing to make the sacrifice - most of the time. I still "sneak" in a little girl time in places, but very seldom and very little (no makeup, etc.)

[Cheryl T]

Our marriage was good, very good. Just before our 10th anniversary she "discovered" me.
We worked through it and I went back in the closet.
Just before our 25th I came out to her and told her I had to be me. If it was something she couldn't handle then I would accept that. We again worked through it and she became accepting and eventually fully accepting. Things only got better from there.
I count myself very lucky to have her.

[Pumped]

You didn't have great as a choice!

My marriage was great before, got a little shakey on the reveal, and continues to be great.

When we were dealing with the reveal I asked my wife if she was considering divorce. She said "Hell no, we will work this out!"

[ellbee]

Just want to say...

As never-married, I find this thread very interesting! :eek: :yippee: :thumbsup: