Are ALL crossdresser transgender?

[Kimberly A.]

Hey y'all! :) First of all, I have shot two videos, plus pics to post tomorrow night, (one video will be posted to the forum, the other will not)..... Anyway, the video I shot tonight will not be posted here, but in that vid, I talk about a topic that I've heard another M to F CD'er/trans woman talk about in one of her vids on YouTube. This particular person, I feel should remain nameless on here, out of respect for her. Anyway, her topic in that particular video was, (from what I gathered from what she was saying and I could be mistaken), that some people think that ALL CD'ers are trans, or we all eventually become trans.... Now, I do think that CD'ing is just a step below being transgender, but if there are people who believe that all CD'ers are trans, I think they are wrong and I think that is a kind of a stereotype. It's like saying all CD'ers are gay or bi and that's not true either, because I'm none of those things. However, of course I know that most if not all transgenders start out being CD'ers, but not all CD'ers become trans.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have NO problem with anyone who is trans, gay or bi. But also, I don't believe that ALL CD'ers are transgender. Now me, I have, on more than one occasion said that I'm very happy being a man, having male anatomy and only being a crossdresser, being able to easily and quickly remove my feminine things. While I do have a very strong feminine side, (obviously LOL), I have NO desire, whatsoever to completely transition into a woman. I never have and probably never will be trans, nor do I want to.

Also, I think that the transgenders on this forum might have more insight on this than anyone else here..... But, what do y'all think? Do y'all think that all CD'ers are trans or will eventually become trans?

P.S.
The vid that I shot tonight, the one that I won't be posting to the forum, of course y'all can see that one as well once I get it gets uploaded to YouTube. LOL

[Karren H]

Personally, I don’t think anyone is a step below or above anyone else! Here or anywhere else. And that labels do not mater.

[Kimberly A.]

Karren, I think you might've misunderstood some of what I said..... I'm saying that CROSSDRESSING, I believe is a step below being transgender, NOT that anyone is over or under anyone else. Also, I'm not trying to label anyone here, trans people are just that, they're transgender, it's how they identify themselves, (from what I understand, or they identify as the opposite gender assigned at birth), and us CD'ers, apparently label ourselves as such. Yes, I know some people here detest labels or labeling, but it is what it is. *Shrugs*..... I meant NO disrespect towards anyone, of course.

[Pumped]

I strongly believe you can CD and not be transgender and no desire to transition. Myself, I love getting dressed but have no desire to transition.
Now, on the other hand, I believe CD'ers are gender fluid or have some sort of gender identity issues.

[Debs]

Hmmm?, some days I dont want to ever change back into male clothes, then yet again I do ?, does that make sense ?

[JustJennifer]

I don't believe that all crossdressers are transgender or will inevitably become interested in transitioning. But if the question is whether some people believe that to be true, then the answer is yes, some people out there definitely believe that's the case. (They're not right, IMO, but people will believe what they will.)

I have no interest in transitioning now -- that ship sailed long ago, and I have accepted who I am. When I was a kid though, back in the 60s/70s, I truly believed with all my heart that there had been a horrible cosmic mistake and I had been born in the wrong body. Unfortunately, given my circumstances and the times, there wasn't anything for it other than to "man up," hide that desire, and get on with the business of being a man. While I often have a "two roads diverged in a yellow wood" mindset about it, I know that to label myself as transgender would be an insult to those who actually are. I'm just a CD.

[Kris Burton]

I believe there are many reasons why a person might be compelled to crossdress. I think it is the portal that most if not all TG persons pass, for some it may indicate gender fluidity or gender identity related issues, some might simply enjoy the sensual feeling feeling of wearing women's clothes, and have no desire to transition at all. I'm sure if you would poll each of us on this forum, you would get a get some variant on one of these, and probably a lot more.
For me, I just know I am quite happy being CD, and that it seems to fill a very deep need within me. Since finally addressing this side of me, I have never felt better psychologically. It gives me great satisfaction to know that I am CD, and has helped me accept who I am.

[GaleWarning]

A quick English language lesson - the prefix "trans" as in transgender, means "to cross" or "across".
Crossdressers such as I dress to cross gender boundaries, not to get angry. Quite the opposite!
I regard all crossdressers as members of the transgender community.

The problem people such as I have, and faintly resent, is that MtF heterosexual crossdressers are deeply misunderstood and regarded as lesser beings by too many people in our community. Kimberly, I believe you are mistaken to believe that "... CDing is just a step below being transgender ...".

Please show me and others like myself some respect!

[MonicaPVD]

The further we travel down this road, the more we learn just how broad our spectrum of different experiences is. I know for a fact today that I would have preferred to transition years ago. That was not practical or advisable at the time, so I have used crossdressing as a coping mechanism. I'm going to make a wild guess that there are many in a similar situation. That said, I have met many CDs who simply enjoy dressing up and have zero hangups over their gender identity. Ditto for the question of sexual orientation. The spectrum is wide and there are no.right or wrong answers, only personal journeys. Enjoy yours.

[Mermaiden]

For me, I?m definitely a crossdresser and feel happy and relaxed in female clothing. But I just don?t think of myself as a woman, not saying I wouldn?t mind if I were, but it is not me. So I conclude I am not transgender, just crossdresser.

[StacyG]

I'm pretty sure Kimberly meant that CDing is a "step" towards transgender for some people. She's not placing one in more importance over another.
This site has been very helpful for me understanding and accepting that I'm just a man who really enjoys women's clothe and being feminine. I'm passive and that why my ex wives didn't stick around. I have a GG who is a lesbian and calls me trans and I've been trying to figure out how to say, the only trans I am is transvestite, just a plain ole CD.

[Sidney]

I am no longer in counseling but spent close to six years of weekly gender counseling and three in marriage counseling. I have now become very comfortable with who I am. I dress probably 99% of the time dressed in womens cloths. The other 1% I wear my man suit to funerals or weddings and occasionally to family functions. All my family live in other states and I know if they met Sidney they could not accept it and tear the family up. I have no desire to transition.
So I suppose answering this question I'm just a crossdresser even though I basically spend 99% of my time dressed as a woman.
There is a pretty large TG organization where I live. I tried to participate but was told.by many members I was a phoney BECAUSE I WAS NOT FULLY TRANSITIONING. I no longer associate with these Transgender people. The Transgender spectrum in very
long and varied. We all started out wearing panties at the beginning of the spectrum other's wind up at the other end transitioning. So I guess I'm a transitioning crossdresser. I hate labels.

[Aunt Kelly]

Oh, thank goodness. Someone has revived the "labels" debate. This dead horse was overdue for another beating.

[Cheryl T]

I always thought I was simply a crossdresser, but the last 10 years and in particular the last 3 have me reconsidering.
In the back of my mind I always wished I had been born female. Now that I spend the majority of my time this way and have become so very comfortable with myself I don't know that my original thought is true any longer. I'm not sure that I will take any more steps forward, but I know I'm not going back.

[Liene]

I'm glad to see this topic to be honest, because I'm struggling with my crossdressing lately. It's not at all new for me - I'm carrying it with me for over 20 years now - but I can't say I've found inner peace yet.

For the longest time I thought I was just a man (albeit not the most 'manly' one) who liked wearing womans clothing from time to time, especially while being under a lot of - what I thought - workrelated stress. Being in womans clothes relaxed me somehow.

Recently I switched jobs and I've yet to experience this workrelated stress, but still, I'm feeling something's not quite right. I tried to be honest with myself and I had to admit I'm not drawn into this 'wearing womans clothes' thing because of external factors but because of incongruency within myself.

My wife casually asked me the other day 'how's your day?' and that's when I told her I was (am) struggling with my crossdressing. In trying to explain to her what I feel, I told her I sometimes want to feel like a woman, be a woman. It's not just wearing the clothes, it's about being beautiful as a woman.

This was a big one for me to tell her. It also felt really strange hearing those words coming out of my mouth, but it felt true. It messed with my head afterwards.
I'm ok with being a man and I'm not considering myself a transgender, but there's definitely something going on in terms of gender.
Like many told before, gender's a spectrum, and I'm only recently understanding this, which feels nice. I think this is the path to finally accept myself for who I am.

It will stay difficult to express all the aspects of my gender because of society, kids, wife, family, friends, work, ... but at least I'm learning to accept myself more and more.

Are all crossdressers transgender? I don't think so. It depends on so many things, starting with you're place on the gender spectrum.

(thanks for listening, glad I could tell my story)

[sometimes_miss]

The perhaps subconscious desire to adopt the female behavior and attire, is obvious in crossdressers. The question remains, why; and most still haven't figured that out. At some point, we simply want to adopt the image and behavior of a female. For some, it starts very early in life; other, later on. We don't know what is the cause, as it happens at different ages for all of us. I'm lucky; it started at a particular time in my life, most likely as a result of outside influence. Then going through childhood and adolescence believing that I was truly supposed to be female, may have resulted in a permanent feeling to that effect, winding up with a permanent condition of gender identity dysphoria. And of course, that only being kept under control, by giving in to it, dressing, behaving and trying to 'feel' that I was actually female. When in normal male clothing, basically 'acting' as if I'm a normal male, I always feel just that: That I'm playing a part, behaving like I'm something I'm not. I only feel normal when dressed, behaving, and thinking that I'm female. Does this make me transgender? Probably not; I don't have any of the natural feelings and behaviors of a genetic 'born female' person. I don't communicate like a woman, don't have any innate female desires. No desire for children, no interest in babies, no nesting impulses, etc.. So what am I?
I'm a messed up male. Stuck with feeling like I'm supposed to be a girl, ever since I was a kid, and told that by someone who was using me for his own sexual gratification. I was told repeatedly that I was supposed to be a girl all throughout my childhood, and for some reason, it stuck. So I'm apparently stuck with that feeling for the rest of my life. Before that, I was a normal boy.

[Debbie Denier]

I am definitely CD and have no desire for gender transition. I believe a lot of modern support groups focus on TG and don?t always cater for the CD. I agree with Kimberley in the respect that some TGs look at CDs as if they are from some level that is beneath them. I have come across that before.When I was a teenager the thought of transition crossed my mind .But I accept who I am and what I am . Support groups are mixed now a one size fits all . 30 years ago they catered more for CDs or TVs as they were known as then..Some of the modern day labels can become distorted , He she, her binary non binary. Some of them for effect and political correctness. I don?t think CD would have same enjoyment if I changed.

[Georgia_Maine]

I feel that the gender variant community, as I call it, truly is a broad spectrum individuals, from the “gender curious” who only crossdress once to those who know that they were born in the body of the wrong sex. Only they can label themselves as to who they are gender-wise. For me it comes down to two questions:

1. What is your physical sex? (that’s the easy one)

2. Which sex do you identify as mentally and emotionally?

If both answers are the same, then one is cisgender, whether they crossdress or not. If the answers are opposite, then one is transgender, whether they express their transgenderism or not. If, like me, question 2 can’t be answered except by saying, “I’m both or neither, but just me”, then you probably are in the TG/non-binary part of the spectrum. At least that’s how I see it.

[Taylor186]

"Are ALL crossdressers transgender?"

Some say yes, others say no. There is no right or wrong answer given the terms are not well defined, agreed to, or universally understood.

[Charlotte Sparkle]

I have often questioned if I'm transgender and I even blogged about it recently, here is an extract of my blog entry:


During my adult life, I've continuously battled to try and understand myself. I've questioned why it is that I'm wired differently to other males and why I need to dress in womens clothing. I've asked myself why it is that I'm attracted to feminine things such as makeup, jewellery, perfumes etc. What is that makes me look at women and wish I had their hairstyle or bodyshape? Why is it when I see women wearing pretty outfits I need to have those outfit too?

GENDER DYSPHORIA?

Many a time I've questioned whether I feel the need to be a full time female but truthfully the answer is no. I've never felt that I've been born in the wrong body and it was only when reaching puberty that I started to to crossdress. Through mid adolescence there was something thrilling and erotic about dressing in womens clothes, however by the time I'd reached my early twenties dressing for erotic thrills had lessened and I found myself wanting to be more like a woman whenever I dressed.

I began to buy wigs, makeup, jewellery and perfumes, I started shaving my body hair and eventually I got my ears pierced. I bought hip & butt enhancers and breast forms too, all tricks of the trade for creating a feminine shape.

Whenever I dressed and donned a wig and makeup I'd look in the mirror and I would get hung up on how I looked. Despite all my best efforts I always felt I needed to do more to create that perfect vision of what I wanted to be.

For such a long time I've always looked at transgender women with envious eyes. I am jealous of their transformations, how feminine they have become, their female looks, their smooth skin and their new upper body appendages.

I used used to question whether I was transgender or not and according to what I've read on the internet, some would say yes whilst others would say no. I'm still no clearer to be honest, but to be on the safe side I don't say I'm transgender any more and instead use the term crossdresser.



You can read the full blog entry at: https://in-the-pink-fog.blogspot.com/2021/11/opening-up-and-writting-stuff-down-part.html

[docrobbysherry]

But statistically, if I recall correctly there r way more CD's than those who actually transition.:straightface:

Of course, I do everything the hard way! When I began dressing in my 50's I wanted to transition.:battingeyelashes:

It was only after a couple years here on CD.com that I realized I was at best, a CD.

I actually think of myself of more as a female impersonator now!:eek:

[BTWimRobin]

I believe we are on a very broad spectrum where you can be all male to all female and everything in between. I also believe your place on the spectrum can be dynamic. There are days I am all guy (not many) and there are days when I'm almost all female. Most of the time I'm stuck in the middle. If I were younger and knowing then what I know now I would most likely seek some level of gender counseling.

So here's a thought .... What if clothing, and fashion did not exist and all men and women just went around naked, would you still feel the need to be or emulate a woman?

[GaleWarning]

If we were all naked, there would still be some of us who feel the need emulate a person of the opposite sex, and ways in which to do this - for example, by doing work usually done by those people.

[Felicia M]

What Monica said.

[April Rose]

Over the years I have spent so much time and energy trying to decide or define who I am, and it no longer seems productive. My focus now on on letting myself BE who I am, and let definitions take care of themselves. I am tentatively hopeful that will be a more productive path.

[Julie MA]

I believe everyone is gender non-binary, having both masculine and feminine traits, thoughts, behaviors, and identifications. If you equate non-binary with transgender, then, everyone is transgender, to varying degrees, and therefore, all crossdressers are transgender. Not to be confused with male and female genetics and birth assignment. Also not to be confused with man and woman, which are societal and cultural constructs.

Julie

[Kimberly A.]

Hi Debs, I second that! LOL..... When I'm en femme, I don't wanna get out of it sometimes, but I know that I have to and it sucks.

[ReineD]

You’ll not reach a consensus on determining whether all, none, or some CDers are trans, for the simple reason that everyone defines being "trans" differently. The various personal definitions run the gamut from feeling that one is a woman and wanting to transition to feeling feminine only when wearing the clothes, and from enjoying sex with men as one’s "true" gender to only enjoying the fantasy of being a "woman" with a man.

Even the Oxford dictionary definition is ambiguous: "transgender: denoting or relating to a person whose sense of personal identity and gender does not correspond with their birth sex." So does "not correspond with their birth sex" mean all the time? Some of the time? Only when dressed? Only when dressed a certain way? And is appearing in male mode for work and with the wife and kids excruciatingly painful? No big deal?

Also the DSM-5 states that the condition of Gender Dysphoria "must also be associated with clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning". This means an inability to cope with life presenting as a man - experiencing debilitating anxiety and major clinical depression unless one is able to live as one’s true gender. But does this mean all the time? Part of the time with male-mode being tolerable the rest of the time?

You can ask 10 people these questions and you’ll get 10 different answers.

[Kimberly A.]

Hi, GaleWarning. :) I meant no disrespect, whatsoever and I'm sorry if you took it that way..... I was simply implying that for one, not all CD'ers are transgender, which seems to be the consensus here and everyone agrees on that. Secondly, I do still believe that while I said, (and I think you may've misunderstood me as well), that CD'ing is a step below transitioning, so please allow me to re-phrase. From what I've gathered, CD'ing for most if not all transgenders is the next step, or perhaps the first step into transitioning. Now of course, I cannot be 100% sure about that myself, because I'm not trans. But please, do not take what I said as an insult on you or anyone else who is trans, because that's not how I meant it. I have the utmost respect for everyone here and everyone who is a CD or transgender, or anyone who identifies as being LGBTQ.

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Now, I will once again reply to all because there were so many comments to my original post..... I agree with some of what y'all said, and disagree with some. The reason I disagree with some is, I do NOT believe that everyone is non-binary, or gender-fluid or that everyone has masculine and feminine traits. I have also, on more than one occasion said that aside from my feminine side, I'm quite masculine myself in my "male mode". Other than CD'ing once or twice a week, I'm 100% male and I'm happy with myself. I'm very happy being a CD'er and having male anatomy. I do not identify with the LGBTQ community at all, (although some might wanna argue with me on that, that's fine), but I choose not to identify as such. I'm not a lesbian, (obviously cause I'm not a female), I'm not gay, bi, transgender, or whatever the Q stands for. LOL..... I'm not non-binary or gender-fluid either, I'm not confused as what's between my legs. If I had to, I COULD stop being a CD'er although it would be difficult and I would miss being Kimberly. I do not believe that all CD'ers are trans and that every CD'er has the desire to be trans either.

[Sarah Doepner]

I think a major problem with this kind of question happened when Transgender became a synonym for Transexual in many people's minds. I loved the term Transgender as an umbrella term that covered the entire range of behaviors, presentation, self-identification and choices once a person challenged or wandered off the Cis Heteronormative path. I used the term Transgender to describe me when I was just starting to crossdress as well as after I started to transition. It's not worth arguing over now, and it may be that we eventually need to define pronouns and where we are on the gender spectrum when we meet someone.

Or, and even better, just move away from the labels and as long as we are treated with some respect, not worry about it.

[ReineD]

I think a major problem with this kind of question happened when Transgender became a synonym for Transexual in many people's minds.

I agree. But I think people began using the umbrella term "transgender" as a substitute for everything because no one could agree on definitions for transsexual, crossdresser, non-binary, gender fluid, etc, etc, etc. :)

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Please show me and others like myself some respect!

I took it that Kimberly A was describing the severity of the condition rather than ascribing worthiness. It's just that some people feel the need to dress more often than others, yet no one is "worth" more or less than anyone else.

[oh to be rachel]

The old joke goes: "What's the difference between a crossdresser and a transgender person?" "Two years!"

That aside, I'd bet that most transgendered people dabbled in clothing of the opposite sex before they ever mentally committed to transitioning.

[Geena75]

Are all Crossdressers Transgender? I hope not, or else I'd have to repeal my membership.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Transgender is when one IDENTIFIES with the opposite biosex. Homosexual is when one is attracted to the same biosex. Bisexual is an attraction to either biosex. ALL have been known to Cross-Dress. (the verb) A Crossdresser (noun) (or transvestite) is generally designated so because they are none of the former. SO he is assumed to be otherwise "Straight". It is understandable why a transsexual/Transgendered person would also cross dress. and Gays are known for it too.----But we already have TERMS to call them. The straight guy who just cross-dresses has no other term So a CROSS DRESSER is a straight person who cross-dresses and has no other issues.----I kind of like textbook definitions, being a Scientist, anyway. One cannot talk about or even think straight about things one has no set definition for.---We THINK in words. Some people still use childhood and teenager definitions for such things and remained confused even into adulthood. Later day Political exploitation also has a role in further confusion.---Folks need to decide on proper definitions and stick with them.---At least for their own logical analysis. And make sure you are on the "same page" with others you talk to about it. ---If a person says, "they don't like labels" it means they prefer to think and work with nebulous concepts at best, and cannot have a clear understanding of the subject matter.

[Maid_Marion]

I find it much easier to interact socially presenting as female.

Marion

[Kelli_cd]

CDing might be part of the journey to fully transitioning. I just don't feel it can be classified as a "step below" transitioning.

[LeslieSD]

I am late to the party. :)

The main issue here is the meaning of these terms. The meaning of the terms do evolve over time. When I first looked (many years ago), the group who just want to wear cloth of opposite sex but otherwise happy with where they are is called "transvestite". The group who wanted to alter their genital is called "transsexual".

Things are different over the decades. The term "transgender" (as the T in LGBT) is invented to cover the whole spectrum of gender variant people, including transvestite and transsexual (because both these two terms starts with a root "trans"). The term "crossdresser" is used more and more in place of transvestite.

The confusion is that people somewhat wrongfully equate "transgender" with "transsexual", because "crossdresser" is not "trans". That is wrong. Crossdressers are a part on the transgender spectrum and belongs to under the overall transgender umbrella.

[alwayshave]

I believe yes, because it is a spectrum in my humble opinion.

[TheHiddenMe]

Oh, thank goodness. Someone has revived the "labels" debate. This dead horse was overdue for another beating.

What she said, but the answer is yes, crossdressing is part of the transgender spectrum.

[AngelaYVR]

I think the delineation exists right at the point where your reasons for dressing are for thrills or because it completes you as a person. I fall into the latter camp but started off in the first and although I have no plans to to take it any further, I consider myself to be TG to some extent, a conclusion that I initially fought for a long time.

[JaneAshland]

I totally get what you are saying. We all have some desire, at various levels, to associate with the female within us, and address, for lack of better words, a femininity gene that drives us to female clothing and appearance. You can define as many levels, from just wearing, touching a few pieces of clothing to fully transitioning to a female. I started many years ago just wearing pantyhose, then added a bra, shoes, dress, makeup, wig etc etc until I now dress completely as a woman when I can. It relaxes me, calms me down. Nothing wrong with trying to define, categorize, and/or figure out what the heck is driving us...then again, it does not really matter, just relax, and be yourself. I wish I understood this years ago, as I am sure I would of taken a different path in life. Some of us don't care, we just do it, and others are trying to analyze and figure out what is going on inside our bodies. Nothing wrong with either.

[MarinaTwelve200]

What she said, but the answer is yes, crossdressing is part of the transgender spectrum.

Transgender DO Cross-dress---but that is the VERB. A "Crossdresser" is a STRAIGHT person who cross-dresses for NO Trans-Gender based reasons. Usually as a heterosexual fetish, escapism, "taboo-tripping" and SM among others. There IS a difference. Not being attracted to same sex or identifying with the other is an entirely different psychology. A Gay guy might Cross-Dress, but he is GAY, not a "Crossdresser". Really, "Transvestite" is a better term, but it is somewhat archaic nowadays.

[Kimberly A.]

The confusion is that people somewhat wrongfully equate "transgender" with "transsexual", because "crossdresser" is not "trans". That is wrong. Crossdressers are a part on the transgender spectrum and belongs to under the overall transgender umbrella.

Leslie, I have to disagree with you..... Tbh, I think this whole thing is becoming less and less about facts and more and more about people's opinions and perspectives. Anyway, the reason I disagree with you there is because I am NOT transgender. Now, if you're using "transvestite" interchangeably with "crossdresser", as in a crossdresser is the same as a transvestite then yes, ok I have no problem with that or with being known as a "transvestite". But, the way I understand it is, if you're ONLY a CD'er and you're not trying to completely turn yourself into the opposite gender, then you are not a transgender, which is the case with me..... Am I correct on that or not? Also, I am NOT transgender and I feel that I do not belong under the "transgender umbrella". If I were turning myself into a woman, then yes, I would be trans but I am not doing that. I haven't had, nor will I ever have any cosmetic surgery to change my features from masculine to feminine, or any SRS, nor will I ever begin HRT..... Therefore, I AM NOT TRANSGENDER!!

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Transgender is when one IDENTIFIES with the opposite biosex. Homosexual is when one is attracted to the same biosex. Bisexual is an attraction to either biosex. ALL have been known to Cross-Dress. .

Marina, I have to disagree with you there as well..... NOT all gays, bi's or lesbians have been known to crossdress. There are some quite masculine gay men, and quite feminine lesbians, (or so I've read) who would never wear the clothing of the opposite gender.

[Di]

This thread is done


Labels cause , arguing, hurt feelings ect . we often fail to remember that at the core we are all human.

Everyone has their Reality and life and not everyone is the same .

Remember that !

I am done editing this post .