Things that your Feminine Side steers you Towards?

[Charlotte Sparkle]

I'm currently growing my hair out and as part of the journey I've taken to dyeing my hair to rid myself of the grey.

There isn't anything wrong with grey but the issue I have is that I'm really grey on the sides but still have a good head of light brown hair on the top. These two colours make it look as though I'm wearing a toupee and so I'd rather just have it one colour all over.

I've experimented with a few different hair dyes in the past to find a shade that's right but usually I've ended up going darker shades.

Yesterday I thought I'd nailed the correct shade as the box indicated a 'light brown' however the results were much darker. As a result the grey has gone but now I'm dark brown all over and it is very noticeable.

I don't mind the colour and my Wife is okay with it but when I go back to work after Xmas people will definitely notice and some will probably comment.

The fact that I'm growing my hair long and I'm dyeing it is a result of my feminine side steering me down that path.

Tomorrow I'm getting my nostril pierced again and I'm going to put in a tiny nose stud which will also be very noticeable but my feminine side is steering me down that path too.

A good few years back I had my ears pierced knowing that it would draw attention to myself but yet I found my feminine side steering me towards getting it done. It resulted in a few comments from fellow workers which was a bit embarrassing but nevertheless my feminine side had caused me to get them done so I could start wearing proper earrrings.

My feminine side continuously steers me towards shaving my body hair and has done so for a long time now.

Hair removal once resulted in a hair removal cream mishap, it's a funny story now when I look back but it certainly wasn't at the time.

I had put hair removal cream on my back and chest before relaxing in the bath and I mistakenly got some cream on the bath. After washing the cream off my back and chest, I lay back in the bath and relaxed for a good thirty minutes after a stressful day at work. During this time the cream that had been left on the bath had found it's way onto the back of my head and it was only when I got out that I realised the full extent of the mishap!

As I began drying my hair with a towel I began to notice hair on it and thats when I realised with horror that the hair removal cream had disolved clumps of my hair! I ended up having to shave the rest of my hair, so not only was I hair free on my chest and back but now I was bald too. As you can imagine that was a talking point at work for a good few months!

My feminine side once steered me towards getting my eyebrows shaped and tinted one lunchtime whilst at work and that ended in disaster. I hadn't told the lady carrying out the procedure that I wanted them shaping in a more feminine way so she only gave them a quick tidy up then proceeded to dye them jet black! I looked in the mirror and my stomach churned, I looked like Groucho Marx and everyone was going to notice this big time!

I ended up calling in sick that afternoon and hurried home to try and rectify things. I ended up cutting my eyebrows short with a pair of scissors so that they weren't that noticeable but people still noticed.

Is it just me or has your Feminine Side steered you towards things you wouldn't ordinarily do as a male?

[Kris Burton]

Absolutely! I just can't do them all. I would like to have my ears pierced, the earrings available are so much prettier than the clip ons which I use when en femme.. However, you have to keep some sort of rings in to maintain the holes. Draws too much attention at this point.

If I could,I would have hair that looks exactly like the wig you see me wearing in my avatar - that's why I chose it (and the fact it was on sale). As a young man I wore my hair quite long, even for '60s-'70s standards, and I would happily grow it all back and more, but male pattern baldness had other ideas. I guess I still could, but it would not have the desired effect.

I am lucky however, I do not have much body hair (that would be TMI for anywhere else but here!) Eyebrows very sparse, very little hair on legs, none at all under arms or chest - just a quick shave takes care of it all - and I always do - I never even used to bother! Facially, until recently I always wore a mustache or goatee, even a beard at times, since 1975. I'm clean shaven now, and I always shave nice and close, and daily to avoid the stubble effect that a lot of guys seem to like - wearing their testosterone visibly. I actually enjoy feeling my face clean and smooth. Sideburns gone too - it just wouldn't do with the wig.

So yes, my feminine side has steered me in this direction...and it feels right!

[Karren H]

Well certainly she has! Pretty sure if she was not in control that I would not have a pair of 38D breasts! And an obsession to grow them larger! Once you have them it is hard to turn back. Plus a lot of male attributes have been dampened or reduced if not eliminated.

[Christie ann]

Would spending hours shopping online for dresses and skirts count?

- - - Updated - - -

What about being the only male in the waiting room reading a woman’s magazine?

[Bruce64]

I spend a few hours each week looking at Women wearing Lingerie, mostly try ons. Pantyhose, Brassiere, lots on youtube and of course Panties shopping, I have probably been to almost all the lingerie stores in Toronto. Not all stores are nice and friendly. And of course I stop going through my Spouse panty drawer.

[Jessica Secret]

It's steered me towards having a boyfriend and loving/wanting gorgeous lingerie & forms - other than those things, nothing specific.

[Celee]

I?ve noticed that I talk more with my hands than I used to and sometimes I?ll exaggerate my arm motions when I walk.

[docrobbysherry]

Thank u so much for your post, Charlotte! For years I've regretted not having a noticeable "female side".:sad:

But, after reading how much work and time u spend on Charlotte? I'm suddenly happy just being Sherry! Fake that she is!:heehee:

[Debbie Denier]

I have learned to exercise more self control as I have got older. If I didn?t it would have got out of control and me in trouble. Like Kris I grew my hair long in the late 70s early 80s . Being clean shaven at the time I could pull of the feminine persona better then than I can now. It did steer me into doing things such as trying on dresses on impulse when in drab. This got me into difficult situations sometimes. Some SAs were helpful , others did not hide their disgust or asked me to leave.I now do my research and am a lot more discrete. A lot of my hair has departed with age so a wig is now the solution. Still not got that to the standard I would like but hey ho.I find that compromise and balance works the best for me.

[Geena75]

My feminine side may try to steer me, but my male side has both hands on the wheel. Otherwise, I would be looking to have my ears pierced and some other notions not to be recommended under my circumstances. I've succumbed a few times, like shaving my legs, buying dresses or shoes.

[Ricky Rayne]

It steered to growing my hair to the middle of my back. So no wigs.. I don't wear forms so I got my nipples pierced. I think that was the most fem I have ever felt .

[alwayshave]

I get my eyebrows threaded every few weeks and have never had an issue. Are there other feminine things I'd like to do but can't, sure. But my wife and job are controlling any outward changes.

[NancySue]

For the recent past, I?ve developed a daily routine for skin care focusing on my face and post shaved legs. Washing my face with special soap, applying moisturizer every morning and nighttime, daily use of special makeup base, and a spray or two of my favorite perfume. Washing my hose and bras by hand with gentle care, hanging to dry then neatly folding and putting away. Fun.

[Linda K.]

My feminine side steers me towards the strappy sandals with 4" heels shelf!!! :daydreaming:

[Jolene G]

It has steered me to browsing online and buying all things feminine.

[Remee]

It has steered me to be more healthy, I am now walking daily almost 3-4 miles (wearing Sports-bra and forms) outside even in cold weather.

[Breanna1975]

Skin care and doing cardio at the gym besides just weight lifting

[Erin Lafleur]

[QUOTE=Kris Burton;4557096]Absolutely! I just can't do them all. I would like to have my ears pierced, the earrings available are so much prettier than the clip ons which I use when en femme.. However, you have to keep some sort of rings in to maintain the holes. Draws too much attention at this point.

Kris, I definitely agree with you that the prettiest earrings are usually for those who have pierced ears. Like you, I'm not ready to take that step either so I was able to come up with something of a compromise product. They are clip on thingamajigs that you simply attach the pierced earrings onto. They work great, and they open up a whole new world of earring possibilities for those not quite ready to make the jump to being pierced. Best of both worlds I say!

https://www.amazon.com/BronaGrand-20pcs-Earring-Converter-Silver/dp/B077TNPZMT/ref=sr_1_8?crid=1FEVM9UBZ9AMI&keywords=clip+on+earring+adaptor&qid=1641698440&sprefix=clip+on+earring+ada%2Caps%2C104&sr=8-8

[April Rose]

Today I spent the afternoon sewing. Does that count? I've had pierced ears for six months now(exactly 2 comments in six months by the way, both of them positive.) (gold hoops the size of a nickel. ) I am also in the process of having my beard removed by electrolysis. That turns out to be less noticeable than you'd think. Skin care is pretty basic; dove soap and moisturizer at night. My bedroom is decorated in a feminine way and I decorate with cut flowers when the budget allows.

These days I find myself more concerned with overcoming my inhibitions than I am with resisting my effeminate impulses.

[Kris Burton]

Erin... I just put them in my Amazon cart. Looks good!

[Lana Mae]

My feminine side led me to become a transwoman! Harry slowly faded away and Lana slowly stepped up! Harry is where Lana used to be! One of biggest steps from male to female was getting my ears pierced! I had vowed as a male never to get any piercings! It went back and forth but Lana won! Hugs Lana Mae

[Wendy-Lyn]

For me, it would have to be shopping.
My male side always hated shopping, especially for clothing. But now I can happily spend an hour or two simply walking through the stores and looking at clothing and accessories. I don't even have to actually buy anything, although I usually do end up with something in my basket even if it's only a pair of pull-up stockings or similar. And I'm a total sucker for a pretty bralette or a nice pair of panties.
Another would be jewellery and other 'bling' items.
Male me hates wearing any jewellery or bling at any time - but I love to wear at least some jewellery all the time, although I'm not one to go overboard.
On the agenda for the near future are getting my ears pierced, and learning how to do basic makeup (I'm woeful at it, and find it hard to see what I'm doing).

[Arindam]

The terms "male-side/female-side" don't make sense to me. I prefer the categories offered by Jungian typology, which --of course-- still gets me into trouble with those who want to promote or prohibit activities and preferences on the basis of gender.

Thus, though born a male, I truly hate football/baseball/basketball, poker, working on cars, etc. and can easily spend hours in a fabric shop, planning my next quilt. As a kid, I wanted to do what my sisters did. In those days, the early 50's, most women still knew how to sew and taught their daughters. So when my sisters began to embroider, I thought it looked like fun and wanted to try. "Nope", both parents said. "That's for girls." When my sisters began painting their nails, I thought it looked cool. Again, "Boys don't paint their nails." So, I offered a compromise. "Can I use clear polish?" You don't have to guess how that went.

I've been beat up too many times, over too many years, to worry about whether what I want to do is "male" or "female". More important to me has become this question: "How can I make it happen?" If that means roping my way 60' feet up a tree to drop a limb, I do it. If that means scaling a 10,000 foot peak, I do it. If that means learning to square-dance by joining a gay men's group, I do it. If that means three days lapping in the fit of a packing gland on a steam turbine generator, so I can get a sign off, I do it. If it means shopping for pocket bras, I do it. But my favorite gender-normed activity is quilting, because it's a world of texture, color, and patterning that's typically denied to males, not though explicit prohibition, but though the usual "gentle" cues of "guys don't do that".

[Wendy-Lyn]

Sorry if you wonder why I used the 'male/female' terms - I'll try to explain why I do.
I use the terms to help me clarify my thoughts as I come to terms with the fact that I'm not 'just a crossdresser', as I thought for many years. I have finally realised and accepted that I'm more somewhere on the transgender spectrum - and I'm trying to work out just where that 'somewhere' actually is. Once I did, all sorts of things in my life and in my past have suddenly begun to make sense, but a lot of things are still a bit (or a lot) confused.
This was what which drew me to this forum in the first place. I lurked and read and observed for some time before I decided to join. And the girls here have been an invaluable source of help - I've read their posts going back for over 150 pages. Some of the advice I found has made this entire thing much easier than it otherwise would have been.
So if I seem confused sometimes, or express myself badly, or use the wrong terminology, please bear with me.

[Arindam]

Sorry if you wonder why I used the 'male/female' terms . So if I seem confused sometimes, or express myself badly, or use the wrong terminology, please bear with me.

Wendy,

You shouldn't feel any need to apologize. In fact, it's me who should be doing so for stepping into your thread. Like you, I came here to try to figure out who and what I am. Reading what others have struggled with has been hugely helpful.

I'm forced to conclude that I'm not a 'cross dresser' as most in this forum would define the term and practice the activity. I'm just a guy whose likes/dislikes and activities have always cut across the usual gender-normed boundaries. But I definitely don't think of myself as a repressed female trapped in a male body, nor would I be willing to involve a partner in my own psycho-sexual dramas.

There are just too many other, more worthwhile things to do with friends, like heading out on a lake, as late afternoon shadows lengthen, each of you in their own boat or float tube, to cast flies to rising fish. Yeah, there's a bit of friendly competition going on. But it's more about companionship and a shared experience as he --or she-- spots a ring form and lays out a tight looping, 60 feet of line. "Nice one", you call over across the water.

Arindam

[ziggie]

I don't know about my feminine side, but this thread has steered me towards Amazon on this cold and dreary winter's day.

[DianeT]

I'm afraid that answering that question will essentially drive us into a world of gender stereotypes, the kind that we usually hate when it comes to our liberty of dressing as we wish. But that's okay, as long as we admit they are stereotypes. I dress as a female stereotype myself (heels and all), however I don't act "like a female" (assuming such a thing really exists) and don't have supposedly gendered activities. I'm not driven to any particular activity when dressed that I wouldn't do in male mode. Doing my usual stuff (watching tv, using the computer) in female attire is exotic enough for me, I'm mighty content with that.