Easing my wife into my dressing

[Breanna1975]

I am working towards letting my wife know I have started dressing..I have a pedi appointment coming up and I said I am getting my nails done with colored polish..I said I wanna feel pretty..she replied I should wanna feel pretty..also she does my brows regularly..what's your thoughts going forward??

[Ricky Rayne]

Keep a open Conversation with her. She sounds open to it but dont assume anything. So stay open to her questions if she has any, be honest with her and yourself. AND do not rush even if she is acceptiong to you dressing take it at a pace she is comfortable with but still let you be you!

[kimdl93]

Seems like you have already begun the conversation. I would suggest spending some time thinking seriously about what/where you would like this to go and then have those frank conversations with your wife. Oh?and listen more than you talk

[Crissy 107]

Good advice from Kim, your wife seems to being open to this side of you so you need to talk some more about it. Do not push too much but go slow. Good luck with the pedicure, it is one of my favorite things

[Kris Burton]

Breanna -I think you have already done the most important thing - you have not tried to hide. It appears you have been upfront since the beginning, and there is no sneakiness in anything you have done so far. You should have no problem continuing on this path. Go slowly as everyone has said, but always keep her aware of the moves that you make...the clothing you purchase, if you wish to step out into the community, etc. Compromise may often be necessary, be willing to do that when necessary. Make sure you always keep her in the loop of what you are doing and how your persona is developing.

[Heather76]

The fact your wife said, you "should wanna feel pretty" would indicate to me she already knows you dress. I don't believe you have to work towards telling her that. What you may have to work towards is telling her to what extent you dress or want to dress. From your post, it sounds as though you told her you're going to have your nails colored. And, if she already does your brows regularly, she certainly isn't ignorant and naive enough not to have a good idea the journey you're on. After you have the pedi, why not proudly display your nails to her and ask the innocent question, "What color and type of outfit do you think would show this pedicure off the best?" If she says to keep your socks on, she may not be on board yet. If she says such and such a color of skirt & top/dress/etc. you're home free.

[docrobbysherry]

If I ever meet your wife I'll ask her for u!:heehee:

[ziggie]

A others have said, you seem to be off to a good start. Don't push, but don't hide. Be open, ask about limits when appropriate, and listen to what she says.

[NancyJ]

As evidenced by the comments from others, there is a lot that we do not know about your relationship with your wife and what she does and does not know about your crossdressing. If I told my wife that I wanted to feel pretty, (unfortunately) she would laugh and tell me that perhaps I can wear pretty clothes, but pretty is for women and I am not a woman. I have never been a fan of the stealth approach. I think we tend to be better off laying our cards on the table face up. Nancy

[Di]

If I ever meet your wife I'll ask her for u!:heehee:
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I absolutely loath the guessing games, leaving hints approach.
But that is just me.
And to be fair so do most wives .
After they do find out , they will remember the games .

[DianeT]

Breanna, if your wife was even suspecting that you could be dressing, she would bomb you with questions. Is it the case? No? Then she doesn't know.

[alwayshave]

Breanna, It sounds like your talking to your wife. Just take it slow and heed what she says.

[char GG]

A pedi is not crossdressing. I know several men that get pedis. If you really want to CD, tell her that. The term “easing my wife into CDing” itself doesn’t ring true here. What you’ve done is tell her you want a pedi with color. Big difference.

Have a real conversation and tell her what and how you want to do crossdress. Don’t think that she can be “trained” into accepting and try not to second guess what she is thinking. Best of luck with your conversation with her.

[Stephanie47]

We do not have much to go on. Reading your prior posts you have ordered panties, and, now you're going to get a pedi. You said you and your wife are conservative. I tend to agree with the GG's. Creeping along with the expectation a wife will accept some level of cross dressing can blow up in your face. Doing your eye brows means nothing by itself. When I get my hair cut I always get my eye brows worked on. My wife hates guys on television who have bushy eye brows. That in itself has zero to do with wearing women's attire. Wait and see what your wife's reaction is t colorizing your toe nails. If your end game is to totally emulate a woman; wig, makeup, dress, hosiery and heels, and, pseudo breasts, she may not want to go there at all. A woman may think coloring toe nails and wearing panties is only a fetish. But, going further and further may raise a red flag with a woman; "Where the heck is this guy going?"

[WillowHanna]

Breanna, I'm still very new to all of this and so is my wife. We've had many talks about everything.

I own multi panties and she say "panties don't bother me, wear them whenever, they are just underwear."
I own 3 bra's but don't own any forms.
The first one doesn't add anything it's more for role-playing in the bedroom.
One is a 40b that has padded cups but no underwire, she has no issue with this bra. As it really doesn't add any extra shape..
My last bra is a 38c padded cups and underwire. It give much more shaping to my chest. Also, with out padding it with socks the underwire bothers me, when I pad it the underwire isn't an issue.
As of our talks, the 38c bra is too much right now. She isn't use to seeing me with a chest. So I don't wear it often around her.

We have had the talks about how far I want to go on this path and if I want to transition and I told honestly right now, no I don't see that being end game. I just want to look and feel like a women sometimes.

Our money is very tight, so I don't own any women's outerwear, dresses, jeans, shirts, ect. I also don't own any forms or wigs because of this fact. We talked and she knows I'd like to buy all of these things. But it's just not in the cards right now.

She knows, that right now, it's a sometimes thing. I.E. I wear panties when not at work, but only wear bra's occasionally.

Moral of all this is allow this a new and fluid situation to both of us, and it sounds the same for you. Keep the lines of communication open and honest. And above all respect boundaries, even as they shift and grow.

[Breanna1975]

Thank you for all the helpful advice! Going to strike up the conversation this weekend when we are out clothes shopping..

[Linda K.]

I said I wanna feel pretty..she replied I should wanna feel pretty..also she does my brows regularly..what's your thoughts going forward??

You need to keep this conversation moving forward and ask her what her thoughts are about this. She seems to be okay with you wanting a pedi and helps you with your look. Talk to her about her feelings on this. It sounds like you have something good waiting for you in your future. Good luck!

[mykell]

if you are going to be honest dont start this in a public venue, sit down at home and have a conversation.
give her the respect to absorb this and deal with it in a comfortable place in your home, it may not go as smoothly as you anticipate.

she may need time to herself to have this revaluation sink in....its a serious matter, please take it that way....you will be puting her in the closet if she wishes no one to know of this.

not trying to be mean, just want to offer some experience with the subject....