View Full Version : OMG! I Did It!!
Wendy-Lyn
01-30-2022, 05:04 AM
Today I went shopping en-femme for the very first time.
I had planned to go to the park as Wendy today and have lunch. So I bought a burger and a coffee, went to the park and changed in the car. I wore a black top, black & white patterned skirt, pull-ups and sandals, and my auburn wig - and my new forms of course. Went into the park and sat on the grass eating my lunch, and then went for a walk to look at the roses. There were a few people there, walking their dogs or watching their kids playing in the kids' playground. No-one gave me a second glance.
But while eating lunch I noticed that my toenails needed a trim, and the polish was chipped. I had planned to buy some nail-polish remover, but had forgotten. I didn't want to get changed again as I was enjoying myself, and thought that since it was a Sunday afternoon there probably wouldn't be a lot of people in town. There wasn't. So I decided to go and get some. I found a park right outside the store I wanted, braced myself, and just walked in.
I browsed till I found what I wanted - I bought the remover, another bottle of nail-polish, a stick of concealer to cover my tattoos, and a stick of lippy. Then when I headed to the checkout I realised I'd left my purse in the car. So - back to the car to retrieve it, went back and paid, and left the store. No funny looks there either. I then walked up and down the block for a while, window-shopping, then headed home via another change in the car.
My heart was in my mouth most of the time, and my adrenaline levels were probably off the scale - but it went far better than I could have hoped. I wore my covid mask, which did help me feel more comfortable and less worried about being seen by someone I knew. I feel as if I've really achieved something, and am so happy.
Jolene Robertson
01-30-2022, 05:18 AM
Congrats, Nothing like that first step out in the real world. No holding you back now, the world didn't end either.
Nylon Wendy
01-30-2022, 05:43 AM
Well done Wendy, I too ventured out for the first time last year and my experience was similar to yours. One thing that was identical to your trip was that no one cared or even looked at me. Act like a woman, dress sensibly and you'll pass. My only exception is my voice, I've never tried to change it and when asked by shop assistants if I need help, I politely reply in my normal voice. And still no one cares.
Femi9
01-30-2022, 06:34 AM
Well done to you! I still don't have courage to venture into crowded places. I've been out in the car and to quiet areas a couple of times but nothing more. Maybe one day!
kimdl93
01-30-2022, 07:08 AM
Congratulations on a successful first shopping trip.
alwayshave
01-30-2022, 07:42 AM
Wendy-lyn, Congrats on enter a store en-femme. The covid mask does give that feeling of anonymity that allows you to feel more confident.
Linda K.
01-30-2022, 07:50 AM
Congrats Wendy!! I hope this gives you more confidence to go out more often, your heart drops back down to where it belongs, and you never lose the excitement of being out and about as Wendy! I am so happy you were finally able to experience what it is like! Take some pictures next time to share with us!
:cheer:
Kris Burton
01-30-2022, 08:06 AM
You did it Wendy - you're out and about! No turning back now-congrats!
Kimberly A.
01-30-2022, 08:30 AM
Way to go, Wendy! :) I know how nerve-wracking it is to go out for the first time en femme, I remember that well..... The first time I did it was a little over two years ago. But as time goes on and you do it more and more, it'll become like second nature to you and you'll be wondering: "Why in the WORLD didn't I do this sooner?!" (if you're not already wondering that). LOL
But, sounds like you had a good outing and I hope you have a lot more! :)
britskye
01-30-2022, 09:03 AM
congrats wendy, sounds like an exciting day
Teri Ray
01-30-2022, 09:51 AM
The fun and excitement always starts with that first step. Continue to have fun and stay safe.
Maid_Marion
01-30-2022, 10:21 AM
Hi Wendy
Congratulations! Shopping can be one of the safer activities for going out dressed.
Marion
ziggie
01-30-2022, 10:25 AM
Congratulations. I"m not near that brave.
NancySue
01-30-2022, 10:29 AM
Way to go! Your experience reminds me of my first time going out. Heartbeat and adrenaline. Congratulations. You?ve opened up a whole new world from which you?ll never go back. Enjoy.
Barbara Jo
01-30-2022, 10:35 AM
It is scary the first time in public as female for us .
However, once you realize that no one will laugh, point etc at you and just treat you as another woman, all your fears will disappear. :)
bridget thronton
01-30-2022, 10:38 AM
Great first outing - easy to forget your purse if you are not used to wearing one
Debbie Denier
01-30-2022, 10:53 AM
Congratulations Wendy. You are a braver girl than me.
Jolene G
01-30-2022, 11:30 AM
Wow congrats!
MarinaTwelve200
01-30-2022, 11:44 AM
I'M not THAT Brave (or "foolish"?) to try it myself.----Good for you! However, I never felt the NEED to go out ANYWAY. The only TWO times I have went out dressed was for my adult Sunday school Halloween party, and later A "womanless Beauty contest", both a few years ago. I felt "justified" because I had "legit reasons". I will have to admit it DID give me an interesting "BUZZ".---but still not enough for me actually WANT to go out dressed for no obvious reason. While I might look good in my pictures, I can't seem to make myself "move" right, and I AM also sort of big. ("scaled-up")
candykowal
01-30-2022, 12:44 PM
Cool experience Wendy...you're officially a seasoned veteran....that all it takes.
A little "Leap of Faith" and confidence goes a long way to being a accepting female in public.
Put a camera in your purse and capture these moments and keep the pictures no matter how you think they look.
In the future you will look back on all of this and realize...."You come a long way baby!"
Philippa Grace
01-30-2022, 12:56 PM
Well done Wendy, it must have felt great! I'm definitely not that brave yet, maybe one day! I was working away from home a few months ago, which gave me a fantastic opportunity to dress at nights, and I did go for a walk one night fully dressed, but I was way out in the countryside and I was 99% sure that no one was around, was still a bit of a thrill though!
Heather76
01-30-2022, 10:31 PM
OMG!!! Wendy, that is absolutely fabulous. You had to have experienced a tremendous adrenaline rush. I'd like to live vicariously thru you because I just don't see myself ever going out in public. The 3 questions I have to ask and hope you will answer.
1. Have you done any practice on changing your voice or did you simply speak in your normal voice? The reason I ask is because I have a very deep voice and know there is no way I could alter the pitch enough to not give myself away.
2. Have you practiced walking in female mode so you wouldn't walk like a linebacker? I don't know if I could master a more feminine walk. Maybe with practice........
3. Had you put on makeup or didn't you use any? I've just started putting on makeup in the late evenings and I know this will be a long process to get it anywhere near reasonable.
Anyway, I have never intended to go out en femme; but, your experience sure makes me want to consider it and also makes me a tad bit jealous.
Wendy-Lyn
01-30-2022, 11:55 PM
Heather, I haven't tried to alter my voice, but I do speak more softly and try to use less of an 'Aussie male' kind of speech. I'm working on the walk, and am not too bad in flats, but I bought a pair of shoes with 2" platform heels last week and they are diabolical to walk in. I'm only wearing them around the unit until I feel more confident in them.
For makeup, I used some concealer to cover my visible tattoos, and applied a little lipstick, and that was all. My painted toenails were visible as I was wearing my sandals, and I wore a bracelet, an anklet, and a silver neck-chain.
One lesson I did learn, though, is this - as a video camera my phone makes a great phone. The video I shot with it was a disaster.
Sandi Beech
01-31-2022, 12:00 AM
Those first trips out are certainly special even with the high anxiety levels. It is certainly something you will never forget. So imagine how great it will feel to have the same enjoyment, but lose the anxiety. After you go out enough, you will still use caution, but your stress level will drop significantly so please keep that in mind.
Glad you got to experience it. It is a lot of fun for sure.
Sandi
BTWimRobin
01-31-2022, 07:30 AM
And the world did not end. Congratulations on your awesome achievement :)
Jenni6521
01-31-2022, 09:29 AM
So happy for you. Going out is such a great experience.
Remee
01-31-2022, 09:54 AM
Well done Wendy. I am not brave enough yet but hopefully one of these days.
-Remee
Karen G
02-01-2022, 05:55 PM
Congratulations Wendy! The moment you realize you are out there doing what you always wanted is just magical. I hope you get a lot more opportunities to do it again. I have only went out two times and I absolutely love it. Unforgettable experience.
Wendy me
02-03-2022, 11:13 AM
From one Wendy to another Wendy very nice
Lori Ann Westlake
02-03-2022, 02:57 PM
Congratulations, Wendy! Don't forget your purse next time! Most women carry theirs around as a matter of course.
One thing you didn't mention: did you SPEAK during the transaction at the checkout? I've hardly been out very much myself, but a couple of times I've bought things in a grocery store while dressed. Luckily I was able to get by at the checkout without opening my mouth. I may possibly have "passed," but I knew my voice would give me away. If you had to speak, that was all the more daring!
Wendy-Lyn
02-03-2022, 04:36 PM
I did, Lori, yes.
But I did speak more softly and slowly, and tried to avoid any typical 'Aussie male' aspects of my speech. And no slang.
Lana Mae
02-03-2022, 04:54 PM
Wendy-Lyn, congrats on getting out! It gets easier every time! I was where you are now and am now out 24/7/365! Get out there and enjoy! Hugs Lana Mae
Wendy-Lyn
02-04-2022, 05:21 PM
OK, this outing to buy makeup seems to have started something both exhilarating and wonderful.
Since that trip I've been out several times. Twice I went en-femme to my local KFC drive-thru then went and ate in a park, and just yesterday did the same at McDonalds as I was on my way to visit the grave of my mother and brother. I was dressed to blend, so felt fairly comfortable. There were no flowers so I went to a store and bought some, then went back and placed them on the grave. I got called 'Darl' and 'Hon' by two separate GGs at Maccas, which felt good.
On a darker note, I then went to enjoy my hobby of photographing and videoing trains (I'm a former railwayman and life-long railfan). I went to a location near my town which I am very familiar with, got out of the car and started to walk to my usual vantage point close to a main highway. Suddenly I realised just how vulnerable I was there, as a woman on her own.
I went straight back to the car and left, and went to a more woman-friendly location in town.
Here is a pic of me placing the flowers on Mum's grave.
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SaraLin
02-05-2022, 06:50 AM
Lovely way to honor both your mother's memory AND your feminine self - at the same time.
Kudos!
Kerry Michaels
02-06-2022, 12:41 PM
A few years back my father died and I was off work for a few weeks. One day I dressed up and went out to a national trust house. I was told I couldn?t go in with my heels because of the floors. I said I had flats in the car but I just went home.
It was a strange experience and I?m reasonably sure I was having some sort of mental break. I didn?t do it agin.
I?ve gone for a walk at night a few times but but generally, I?m terrified of it.
Barbara Jo
02-06-2022, 01:03 PM
1. Have you done any practice on changing your voice or did you simply speak in your normal voice? The reason I ask is because I have a very deep voice and know there is no way I could alter the pitch enough to not give myself away.
There is an old "trick" that might help.....
Tighten you throat a bit as if you were about to gargle.. then speak rather softly
It will raise you pitch a bit without resorting to a falsetto.
Practice this at home a bit so it becomes second nature for you when interacting in public as a female .:)
Kelli_cd
02-06-2022, 03:03 PM
I read somewhere that if you raise your normal boy voice up a 6th, that it helps, too. If you're unsure about the 6th, think about the scale:
Do - Re - Mi - Fa - Sol - La
You want to raise your normal voice to La.
Wendy-Lyn
02-15-2022, 09:57 PM
Went out again this morning, flying my drone. Got clocked by these two guys who pulled up close to where I was flying from, but had a pleasant interaction with them anyway - they were more interested in the drone than in the old CDer flying it.
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Joanne108
02-15-2022, 11:24 PM
That's great! Going out in public in retrospect is one of the bravest things I've ever done! I am sure that's was the same for you! Leaving the car and walking into a store while being fully dressed! I remember my first time too! It is an truly an accomplishment to go out in public while dressed as a woman!
BrendaPDX
02-16-2022, 07:24 AM
Hi Wendy!
I am so happy for you! You go girl! I went to a coffee shop and left my purse on the table, had to go back to the table, thinking what woman would forget her purse on the table. Congratulations! I wish I could say it gets easier, but isn't that part of the trill?
Brenda
--Missy--
02-16-2022, 07:32 AM
Is that a selfie you shot from the drone? I love it! Thanks for sharing.
Wendy-Lyn
02-16-2022, 03:14 PM
It is, Missy, yes.
I made several flights at different locations around the area.
I actually think this is a better pic, but I wanted to show the two guys in the other one.
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