Do you alter your voice when going en femme

[P_Alexis]

I have just came out as a cross dresser & according to my wife I am very manly. The way I was brought up was a man doesn't cry nor would he ever dress as a woman. I do have a deeper voice. If I was to dress in full female attire, talking to somebody they would straight up know I am a male. Of course I also don't have a woman's figure. When going out do you soften your voice or try to change the pitch? Try to sound more female.

Alexis

[Sandi Beech]

Perhaps I do talk a little softer just so it is harder for people at a distance to hear me, but for the most part I do not bother trying to speak with a female voice. I have met a lot of people while dressed and it is just not necessary.

Sandi

[April Rose]

There are things you can do to make your voice sound more feminine, but they are not necessarily intuitive and they take a lot of time and practice. If you are interested there are tutorials on You-tube that are a good place to start. You can raise your pitch, but just going falsetto will fool no one. If your physical presentation still says "Guy in a dress" I would work on that first.

I'm part of the way there voice wise, but I've spent hours and hours on it, and I still can't maintain it over time. It is very challenging.

[sometimes_miss]

Nope. I'm 'me' all the time; I don't have two personalities that I switch back and forth from, or anything like that. I don't change the way I walk, or move, either when I'm dressed in girl clothes. Well... I did try to mimic the cheerleader's movements when I do my sideline dance and cheer routine when I'm watching the game on TV when I'm in my cheerleader uniforms.

[Majella St Gerard]

If I am out shopping or running errands I will use the best female voice I can muster, but it's usually just for short sentences. When I'm out at a bar or club it is too loud for me to be heard so I just talk in my natural voice and try to soften it up a bit.

Peace & Love
Gerri

[VivianNewkirk]

I'm fortunate that a lifetime of public speaking experience makes it quite easy and natural for me to moderate my voice. Vivian's speech is more lilting and "come hither" than my rather commanding male voice.

[Marissa Q]

I'm like Sandi B. in that I modulate my pitch for less abruptness, more softness (with a pinch of vocal sugar added to sweeten up the tones). But I definitely don't try to force it as it ends up sounding all too strained and, quite frankly, horribly faux.
I'll also like to add that in doing the above, it actually helps bring some relaxation and calm to my entire bearing while dressed.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

No, I'm a guy and will fool no one. Perhaps because of that, or perhaps just because, I don't go out shopping or clubbing or anything en femme. I do take out the garbage or sometimes go the the gas station to fill up in a skirt and cute top however. My voice, my walk, my everything is still guy-me.

[missjoann49]

I try to talk a little softer

[CrossKimmy]

Absolutely! I need the whole thing to be female when presenting as such.

[GracieRose]

When out and about dressed, I try to move my voice from my throat to closer to my nasal cavity. I do speak softer and add a little sing-song lilt. Most of the time it is just a little bit of an improvement. However, sometimes it seems to fall into place and comes out pretty well. At those times, I am enjoying being me and not working hard at it. Can't get there on demand though. :sad:

[Kris Burton]

I've just begun to experiment with this, simply speaking more softly really. It has worked on the phone.

[Wendy-Lyn]

I can't make my voice sound like a woman's to save my life - it comes out like someone parodying a homosexual (and badly, at that), so I speak more slowly and much quieter than I do as Jimmy, and with a rising inflection. I also try NOT to speak like a typical Aussie male (very difficult as that's what I have been for 60+ years), and I keep the slang and swearing to a minimum. Aussie girls do swear, but not like a soldier, as Jimmy invariably does.

It's not that effective, and ensures I'll usually be clocked as soon as I speak, but it's the best I can do.

[DeeDee67]

I can at times, depends on how deeply I'm in a Pink fog. I definitely can do it in another accent but not my regular voice.

[Helen_Highwater]

I've posted this a few times but always worth repeating I feel.

The advice I was given by a speech therapist married to a CD'er was don't do the falsetto thing. Speak more softly and if you want to raise the pitch, start with your natural voice and sing; Do-Re-Mi. Ri or Mi is as high as you need to go. Softer more breathy voice, very slightly raised pitch is all that's required to at least get you started.

Also remember women tend to be more chatty. They are more likely to engage in conversation with someone they've never met than a male. What you say, how you say it can be considered simply as another mannerism to be mastered.

Speak with your eyes. Women will make eye contact if say talking to an SA.

I understand not altering your voice. I'm as guilty as the next at times. However I do look upon it in the same way as dressing to blend. People are more welcoming if it looks, sounds, like you've made the effort to be as "womanly" as you can.

[Princess Chantal]

No not at all, but then again I am okay with people knowing that I am a crossdresser. Actually I prefer that they do.

[BobbiKay]

I am a natural baritone, so I wouldn't fool anyone. But I do tend to speak with a higher pitch when interacting with women. My wife has remarked that she doesn't like my girly giggle. So maybe there's hope.
I haven't pursued retraining my voice in any serious way, but sometimes I sing along with the car radio, and try to do it in the same octave as the record. Not an octave down, as is often more comfortable for me.

[GretchenM]

Raising the pitch of your voice is hard to do and make it sound genuine. It takes loads of practice as well as feedback from someone else or recording your voice and correcting it by listening to it until you get it right. Takes a long time to get it genuine. Many who transition don't bother much anymore.

However, one thing that often has a greater impact than pitch is structure. Listen carefully to males and females talking. There is a considerable difference in the way they structure their sentences. Most apparent is that men tend to structure the sentence as more of a statement while women tend to lean more toward a statement coming out as more of an inquiry or question. It has been said that gender voice is more a matter of the way you speak rather than the pitch that you use. Keep in mind, women's voices vary in pitch as much as men's and in some parts of the range they overlap. But how they say things is really more telling.

[Andrea Renea]

I just speak in my normal voice. Maybe as others said a l
ittle softer tone. Not really fooling anyone.

Normally still addressed as ma'am.

[alwayshave]

I don't have the deepest voice, so I just attempt to speak more softly.

[Krisi]

I attempt to use a female voice. I wouldn't be able to carry on a conversation, but I can respond to comments like "Good morning." and "How are you today?" And say "Thank you." if someone holds a door for me.

As far as you not having a woman's figure, the rest of us don't either. That's what silicone and foam is for. ;)

[ellbee]

Also remember women tend to be more chatty. They are more likely to engage in conversation with someone they've never met than a male.

It probably depends on the situation, but yeah, you're right. Scientific fact! :p


I can do a pretty legit GG voice -- in very limited amounts. Like, just a word or two, or a short sentence. Gets way too tough after that.

Even when totally en femme, I'd only use it sparingly.


These days, I'm more about doing the whole "obvious women's outfit while presenting as a guy" thing, than anything. And as such, I just femmy up my voice a bit... Still a guy's voice, just shifted towards the feminine.

And yup, I now chat with my apartment neighbors all the time like that. I bump into at least one GG a day... In the hall, in the front lobby, out in the parking lot. And we always talk a bit! :battingeyelashes:


Of course, I run into some male-neighbors, too, while presenting like this. I tend to initiate conversation with them, as I don't want it to go a weird direction... Either certain things, or even not saying anything at all, which would be awkward & creepy! :eek: I just want it to be a normal vibe. A simple "Hi, how are you?" & maybe a smile will suffice. If it goes no further than that, still all good! :thumbsup:


But yeah, it's fun talking to people. If you act like a decent & friendly human, then odds are, they will reciprocate. :)

[Jillian Faith]

Absolutely. My late wife was my sounding board to help me achieve a more feminine tone when we went out as girlfriends.

[Linda E. Woodworth]

Nope, never have.

Still, I'm just as libel to be addressed as ma'am on the telephone and sir.

[ShirleyN]

Hi Alexis. I generally tend to speak a little more softly and slowly when I'm dressed en femme. Whether or not that sounds in any way feminine I don't know.

[Cheryl T]

I soften mine and raise the tone slightly, but I'm not sure it works.
I just don't want to seem too incongruous.

[josie_S]

Like many have said, I soften and modulate my voice. At some point, I heard that it's helpful to sing along with women artists/musicians to train your voice to soften and elevate the pitch...I try that in the car sometimes, but I'm not certain about the results :raisedeyebrow:

[MonicaPVD]

Like many others, I soften my voice and slow down a little. I find that trying to change the pitch of my voice sounds a bit forced and draws unnecessary attention, the exact opposite of my objective.

[Joyce Swindell]

I don't try to change pitch but I do try to leave out the bass in my voice. I agree it's very much how you speak in a female mannerism than tones. There are many women who have male tones, maybe a smoker or other issues.

[Heather76]

The first time I went to church with my wife, one of the gents in the choir (didn't know I couldn't carry a tune in a bucket) said, "Oh, wonderful, we need a bass in the choir." While I've never been out en femme, I'm not fooling anyone with my voice if I ever do go out.

[Veronica Lacey]

As I do not venture beyond my homestead it may be a moot point. With that said, should I ever take it into the real world I would simply speak in my normal male voice. I have no designs on passing as female and just want to be me: a man who prefers to wear what he wishes to.

[Maid_Marion]

I can tell my normal voice really bothers telemarketers because it doesn't match the name on their call lists!

[Yinlingyen]

I spend hours practicing my voice.
Now I can feel more confident conversing with sales assistants , baristas ect
Even as I being to start dressing up and putting my make up on I try to sing in a femme voice and this gets me all warmed up when I go out.

[Barbara Jo]

As others have said, speaking softer can help
Also, your voice should have some lilting cadence to it.

One thing that can raise pitch is something I was told a long time ago
Tighten your throat slightly as if you were about to gargle and speak.
it will raise you pitch without that awful falsetto.

[fun4metoo2004]

No. I don't bother. My voice is too deep to try to change it.

[Patience]

Not consciously.

I feel if I try to change my voice deliberately, it'll only seem like I'm trying to change my voice deliberately. It'd only look ridiculous. Make that more ridiculous.

If my voice changes in any way, I just let it happen spontaneously.